Ok here we are people, brand new chapter :) Thank you very much for the reviews in the first two chapies, i'm glad you like it, this is a chapie with no Rosalie in but i think it's a satisfying chapie :)

It's unbetaed so be patient, i hope u will like it :) (I haven't forgotten the ultimate love and the from light to darkness, but my muse is focused here for now :))

Enjoy...


Chapter 3 – Shaken

Now I know that the end comes
You knew since the beginning
Didn't want to believe it's true
You are alone again
My soul will be with you

Why's the clock even running
If my world isn't turning
Hear your voice in the doorway wind
You are alone again
I'm only waiting

You tear into pieces my heart
Before you leave with no repentance
I cried to you, my tears turn into blood
I'm ready to surrender
You say that I take it too hard
And all I ask is comprehension
Bring back to you a piece of my broken heart
I'm ready to surrender

I remember the moments
Life was short for the romance
Like a rose it will fade away
I'm leaving everything

No regrets, war is over
The return of a soldier
Put my hands on my bleeding heart
I'm leaving all behind
No longer waiting

You tear into pieces my heart
Before you leave with no repentance
I cried to you, my tears turn into blood
I'm ready to surrender
You say that I take it too hard
And all I ask is comprehension
Bring back to you a piece of my broken heart
I'm ready to surrender

I've waited for so long!

You tear into pieces my heart
Before you leave with no repentance
I cried to you, my tears turn into blood
I'm ready to surrender
You say that I take it too hard
And all I ask is comprehension
Bring back to you a piece of my broken heart
I'm ready to surrender
I'm ready to surrender

(Angra)

'I think you should really give him a chance, Hermione, at least one because this can't work as a second… he never had a first chance.' Luna said calmly as she set her teacup back on the table; Hermione huffed as the two women were sat in the living room.

Luna had learned about Harry's return by the Prophet that had started the chaos of the return and she had decided to visit her friend. The two women had gotten closer during Hermione's pregnancy as Ginny had put some distance between herself and Hermione and she had allowed only Ron to be close as he was the remaining best friend that refused to let her down after all the shit they had been in.

'I don't want to talk about it, Luna, really, I don't.' Hermione said as she sighed and looked at the pictures on the railing of the fireplace, her little daughter was smiling and waving back at her from the pictures. Hermione sighed at the thought of how confused Rosie would get if Harry was to get involved in their lives, her child was now with her grandparents who insisted to have her for the day and spoil her a little more, all the while giving some alone time to their daughter as to think over the situation.

'Oh I think you do, Hermione, come on, this is huge, he is back, you have a chance at normality, and don't lie to me about not having missed him.' Luna said and Hermione at times like this hated Luna for being so honest and clear with everything. Of course Hermione had missed Harry; of course she had missed his voice, his touch, his hand clutched with hers, the feeling of security close to him. All those things have been awakened after a lot of effort to put them in slumber, but along with them, the pain and the desperation and the anger and the disappointment have been awakened as well, if they were ever asleep inside her.

'I don't want to mess Rosie's life by having him invading her it out of the blue, Luna.' Hermione tried to use the greatest reason of her not wanting Harry back, she just couldn't imagine herself facing such a situation.

'You will mess Rosie's life later on, if she learns that her father actually returned, didn't know about her before so he wasn't really responsible for his absence in her life however you knew and denied his chance with her, she will hate you for denying such a thing for her.' Luna said and Hermione decided to get angry at her words about his absence instead of facing the truth in Luna's words.

'You know what? Yeah, of course Harry didn't know about Rosalie, and do you remember why? Because for more than four years he didn't give a darn as to send a letter and most importantly: to let anybody sent him a letter. Do you remember how many letters of mine came back unanswered, unsent? Do you remember how much I tried? Don't give him the chance to get away with it because he didn't know, if he had have cared, he would have known. If he had allowed me to inform him, he would have known and Rosalie wouldn't have to be through all this.' Hermione said angrily and Luna sighed calmly and nodded her head.

'I totally agree, he's guilty for not communicating, but he's innocent of not knowing about Rosalie. Hermione, come on, we both know that, he was a right asshole for not allowing us communicate with him but he couldn't have predicted that you were expecting his child. Of course almost five years is a lot of time but still… he returned, he had been your best friend from more than the years of his absence, maybe you should put aside his absence and count his longer friendship, his longer care and love for you, even in the years you were something like a couple back then…' Luna said slowly and Hermione stood up and looked out of the window with her back at Luna. Hermione closed her eyes and breathed through her nose as she knew, Luna was right, but still… she couldn't give up everything so easily, she didn't deserve all that had happened, and Harry needed to be proven trustworthy again, not only for her but for her…their daughter. The responsibility was huge and even if she was tired of doing it on her own, she wouldn't mess up her child's life just because Harry wanted to try.

'I don't want him back,' Hermione lied and heard Luna snorting and standing up, Hermione turned around and saw Luna taking her purse and smiling at her.

'I have to go back to the magazine, think about what has happened, Hermione, think about of what you truly want and what not about yours and Rosie's life and make the right decisions, I won't tell you that Harry loves you, you already know that. You just need to accept it.' Luna said and Hermione sighed again and nodded her head mostly because she had nothing to say to her friend who had spoken the truth out loud.

~*~

Harry woke up with the feeling of his chest being heavy and his head full of thoughts and troubles. His first time with Hermione after so long had left her collapsed at his wake and that wasn't a nice start, the thought of that pair of girly, emerald eyes made his lips twitch upwards with the ghost of a smile as he stood up and stretched his body in his room in the Leaky Cauldron.

He looked out of the window of his chamber at Diagon Alley, he could hear a young boy from the street, selling the Prophet and screaming his head off about Harry Potter's return. He could imagine what would have happened when Hermione was pregnant and the Prophet would have noticed. Harry guessed that everyone around the world suspected that Hermione's child was his. That was the truth. He had a child with Hermione.

If things had been different, if he hadn't been a coward, this news would have been the best in his life, having a family was a dream of his ever since he was a child. And now that he had a family, he needed to try and get it back to him, if and ever Hermione allowed such a thing.

Harry had spent half of the night trying to realize that happiness had tried to reach him and he had turned his back at it without knowing. He hated himself for the things he could imagine Hermione would have been through, he hated the fact that his own child asked about who he was just a few hours ago, and he hated the fact that Ron and everyone else knew when he had no idea.

The stupid jealousy of Ron being the Prefect like Hermione instead of him back in their fifth year, consumed him again but this time about something way more important. Ron had a place in Rosalie's life and that hurt him like nothing else, and this time things were worse because now, Harry could blame none else but himself for losing all this when he could have it all.

Harry kept staring at the crowded street of the Alley, his mind still racing with what he had decided the previous night. Have a house close to Hermione's, learn everything about Rosalie and her mom, make himself trustworthy and useful for Hermione's full hands with their daughter were his first priorities, apply for a job as an Auror as to be close to Hermione who was also in the Ministry was a second decision and try to make her understand if not care about him again was as important.

Harry was amazed at the fact that he longed so much to see Rosalie and Hermione again. He hadn't gotten enough of Rose and Hermione the day before, partly because he was too shocked and partly because Hermione had cut short his first time ever with their daughter.

'…you don't belong here…' Hermione's voice came back in his memory, 'I had been trying to find you! You abandoned me! You abandoned her! You never gave me the chance to tell you what was going on! You wanted a family? You got one and you didn't even know! I though you died!!!' Harry closed his eyes as more of her words rushed back in his mind as he woke up more and more from his uneasy sleep, he hated the pain that had colored her words, pain caused by him, pain that he never imagined he would make her feel, not her, not Hermione.

'You have no idea how difficult it was for me!' Harry felt a tear of anger, pain and desperation ran down his cheek. 'You didn't care! You thought of yourself not of both of us! I was ready to end it in another way, I had learned about Rosalie! I was ready to take us out of that shit we had set up! But you ran away! Left me out! Like always! You have no right to tell me that you love me! You do all but that!'

'Leave, Harry, I mean it, let me be! You have hurt me enough! Let me and Rosalie alone! There's no place for you in her life, I have been trying to fill that place and I have succeeded, so leave! Go away!'

Harry opened his eyes and looked at the clouded sky of London, he hated all the pain he had caused, all the pain that now was backfiring on him, and he hated to know that Rosalie had no idea who her dad was.

'Hermione,' Harry sighed the name he loved so much, the name he had screamed out, the name he had whispered like now and the name he had called with gratitude, love, care, concern and even passion and lust. Hermione wasn't his once best friend, she had been his everything, and now, she was even more. He had lost her, his everything, his friend, his lover, his partner, the mother of his child.

'Me and my stupidity,' Harry sighed and he looked around the room for his shrank suitcases. It was time for him to get dressed, get out, take money from the bank, find a house and start a life.

~*~

Hermione entered her office in the Ministry late that day, being close to the top gave you privileges and that was a good thing, having a great friendship with the Minister also helped. Hermione had felt the eyes of all the Ministry staff along with the visitors' on her as she got in her office from the atrium.

Of course, people had learnt about Harry Potter's return and the Prophet hadn't hidden Rosalie's birthday in the previous day's issue, since the birthday was on the Battle's anniversary and Harry Potter had decided to return that specific day back in the Wizarding world.

Hermione hated the coincidence and she hated the fact that the day before none had worked as it was a holiday for the Wizarding community so everyone knew about everything. She started working on reports her team had left for her from the early morning, of course, being an Auror and a mom and having the chance to choose had let her more in the office and less in actual action, at first she hadn't liked it but when she realized that she was alone in the world and the only one for Rosalie, she had decided not to risk her life if it wasn't really necessary and her team truly needed her.

After all, Hermione had decided that she was done sacrificing herself for others, she needed the chance to raise her child…

She was lost in the paperwork for a long time and she actually jumped when two hours later, there was a knock on the door and Kingsley Shackelbolt's form could be outlined from the other side of the glass door.

'Come in!' Hermione called as she stood up, mostly out of respect for her old friend and Order co-member than the typical behavior of people seeing the minister. Kingsley entered the office with a big smile on his face as he looked at Hermione.

'I'm so sorry I didn't make it yesterday, I had to attend all those wishy-washy festivities instead of being there for the little princess, after all only we know how it was to fight, not those ambassadors that didn't help back then.' Kingsley said with a snort but happy eyes and Hermione chuckled and nodded as she knew about the games of politics in times that few people grieved for their losses and the rest simply lazed around on the holiday…

'It's totally fine, Kingsley, Rosalie had an eventful party anyway,' Hermione said, not giving too much away but being sure that Kingsley already knew probably. Kingsley sighed and nodded his head. Hermione caught the troubled face of her friend and waited for him to speak as he looked around him uneasy.

'Is there anything I should learn now?' Hermione finally asked and Kingsley cleared his throat. Hermione decided to sit back on her chair as she knew she would soon need support, Kingsley usually didn't look afraid to talk about something and they had their share of fights given she was an auror who wanted immediate action and he was the minister who wanted diplomacy.

'Everyone knows about Harry's return in the community,' Kingsley started and Hermione nodded her head, trying to ignore her heart that jumped at the sound of his name. 'And he is a hero, for everyone else, always was, actually.' Kingsley said and Hermione nodded her head again as she knew she would soon hear something she would hate. 'Well earlier today, when I arrived, the council was waiting for me; Harry applied for a job as an auror here in the ministry…' Kingsley said and looked at Hermione who gasped but waited with her breath caught.

'And the council wanted him desperately, his application proves that he finished his training in Salem and worked in the United States as an undercover auror there for a long time and now he wants to come here and the council of course wouldn't let the hero go away…' Kingsley said and Hermione shot up from her chair.

'Of course you're not losing your current position Hermione, you're still second in command,' Kingsley said and Hermione was ready to protest. 'But the council decided, as to have the ministry seem more friendly after the taxes set on the community, and have Harry as the head of the department…' Kingsley said and this time Hermione slammed her hands on the table with such force that frames and folders fell off the desk.

Kingsley closed the door behind him as he knew Hermione would explode any second now. 'I know you have tried a lot as to get the position and you're the youngest to be second in command, you can't imagine how Miles felt about losing his position but—'

'I DON'T CARE ABOUT HIM BEING MY SUPPERIOR!! I DON'T WANT HIM HERE AT ALL, EITHER AS A SUPERIOR OR SOMEOME BELOW ME!! I WANT HIM OUT OF HERE!! AWAY FROM ME!' Hermione finally bellowed with all her power and Kingsley just stood there, knowing what she had been through but not really being able to do something about it anymore.

'I know Hermione, really, but the council decided who's in and who's out and we can't change that.' Kingsley said and Hermione could feel angry tears ready to leave her eyes. She now realized she hadn't seen Miles in the office the moment she got in; she realized it just now with her mind clear from the previous night's events and full of that moment's news.

'Announce to the council, that since they dismissed Miles, and brought someone -someone out of the team and even the COUNTRY- as the head Auror, then I quit!' Hermione said after a moment as her mind was still full of furry, Kingsley sighed and spoke.

'Hermione, right now, you're furious, take your time, have a couple of days off and think about it,' Kingsley said and Hermione snorted.

'I was away for a holiday, yesterday, and the council decided to have a stranger as the head auror and Miles off, what is going to happen if I take days off?!' Hermione shouted and Kingsley sighed again, still patient because he knew…

'Harry is not a stranger, and believe me, Miles would go anyway-'

'And I would take his position…' Hermione interrupted and this time Kingsley had nothing to say, he knew that if Hermione was out of the ministry Harry wouldn't have a link to the rest of the team and the methods they used in the UK and that would be a huge functional problem as the council cared only about the Ministry's image and not the actual working of the most important of departments.

'Hermione, I know it's unfair, I voted against the whole thing myself but I can't change it, having yourself unemployed with a child and single won't solve anything. Take the days off, think over what you've sacrificed as to get where you are and I'm telling you again, it's unfair for you to lose the Head's position but you got already way too far for your age so don't spoil it because of… the past.' Kingsley said calmly and Hermione took a deep, shaky breath and collapsed back on her chair.

Her thought at the Burrow about her life getting shifted once again was coming true and only twenty-four hours had passed and the ground beneath her feet was trebling…

~*~

'I'll take it,' Harry said with a smile on his face, the old woman before him smiled as she nodded her head and conjured a quill with her wand as to sign the contacts. Harry had been informed from Ron that Hermione owned a flat in a block of flats that was almost full of magical people and that she had tried to find a house like that even in Muggle London as to have Rosalie away from the frenzy of the fame in the Wizarding World but also have her somewhere safe in case her magic slipped while she grew up.

Harry was lucky to find out that two flats were out for selling in the building and he chose the one on the same floor with Hermione's, just a couple of doors from her own. He signed the papers needed on the magical contact and then took out from his Muggle jacket's pocket a small bag full of galleons. The kind looking woman took the money and gave him the keys of the house, he thanked her, she apparated away after wishing him the best and just like that, Harry was Hermione's neighbor.

It had been hours ever since he had applied for a job in the ministry, went to the bank, met Ron briefly and then went shopping for his new house. With a wave of his wand, the house was cleaned and with another wave of his wand he moved all the shrank furniture from a bag he had with him, in less than a few moments, the two-bedroom apartment was full of furniture, stripped of decorations but ready to be filled with touches of the owner, for now, it was a clean, satisfying place to live.

Harry looked around him satisfied and took out of his pocket the first piece of decoration, the shrank frame with a picture of himself and Hermione at their first day of auror training some years back, when only true friendship was blossomed between them and nothing was changed, apart their troubled post-war status with the nightmares and the fears, troubles that had only subsided during their lustful affair even under those circumstances. Harry sighed as he enlarged the frame and placed it on the coffee table, where it could be displayed easily.

He looked around him again and could only hope that his life would soon find a rhythm with a job proving him able to help others and Hermione and Rosalie in this life, hopefully.

Little did he know that the sound of the elevator from outside, signaling Hermione's return would bring another major fight in less than two days from the moment he was back …


SOOOO? Harry is circling himself around Hermione's life, Harry doesn't know about the job yet so don't blame him hehe, what u think of it? you know how governments can be with people thought heroes so that's why harry took the Head position, please tell me what u think of the chapie and hermione and harry

thanks, please review