Miss U

I stare at the glowing light of my cell phone which had just woke me up

It's 3 am. I text back and rub the sleep from my eyes

& ur awake. Need 2 C U.

I groaned to myself. Why can't I just tell him no?

Where? I text back, pulling on a pair of jeans. I pull my hair back into a ponytail and smooth out my white tank top before glossing my lips.

My room. Trey is out.

While sneaking out of my room, I glance toward Ivy's door, praying that she's asleep. I don't want to have to come up with a story to tell her if she asks me why I was sneaking around. I imagine that "oh about that, I've been making out with your boyfriend every time you turn your back. It's gotten complicated to meet during the day so I'm skipping out on sleep to get my Josh fix" would be a great way to strengthen our friendship.

"Hey gorgeous." Josh pulled me into his room before I'd had a chance to knock.

"Mmm by the way, I missed you too" I purred into his neck. Josh laid me back onto his bed, crawling on top of me. When his mouth met mine I felt like I could melt. Our hands roamed and we kissed so much that my lips were red and swollen. When I was with Josh, my heart felt whole. We were supposed to be together. I snapped out of my giddy daze when I realized his hand had made its way under my shirt, his other hand was attempting to push down the waist of my jeans.

"Josh, stop." My head and my heart were battling each other. There weren't words to describe how much I wanted to let him to continue. I've waited so long for my first time with Josh. But it couldn't be like this. I'd been pretty lax on my morals but I will not sleep with someone else's boyfriend.

"What is it Reed? What's wrong?"

"I have a hard time saying no to you. We've been sneaking around for weeks now, and its killing me. You have a girlfriend Josh, and as much as I want to touch you, as much as I want to be with you, at the end of the day you're still with Ivy. You tell me you love me and maybe you do, but I can't do this anymore. I can't keep waiting for you to decide what you want. You've made your choice. You chose Ivy. And this is the last time this will happen. It's not fair to Ivy and is sure as hell not fair to me!" I picked my coat off his bed and paused at the door "I love you Josh. And it hurts."