Mutant bride

By Todd Fan

Disclaimer: "Remember, nothing says "good job" like a firm, open-palm slap on the behind"

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Act 3 – A meeting

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We open on the Grey estate (which is really the Worthington estate, but let's not get into that right now), where Pietro opens the door, showing Jubilee trying to tidy up Scott's hair and shirt.

"Look at the way you're standing!", she scolds, "You look like you've got rickets or something!"

"…I feel so loved", says Scott with a sigh.

Jubes noticed everyone staring at her and chuckles nervously, leading her 'family' inside.

"Oh!", she says impressed, "Beautiful, innit?"

Pietro sniffs haughtily.

"Brownnoser", he mutters under his breath.

"Pot, kettle and black, Pie-Pie", smirks Pyro.

"It's not as big as our place, Dear", says Bobby, "Bit shabby, really, isn't it?"

Jubes smacks him with her fan.

"Shut up!"

Bobby winces, backing away from her.

"Last time I give you an ice rose", he mutters under his breath.

"Lord and Lady Grey", says Pietro, as they come down the stairs, "Mr and Mrs Summers"

"Why, you must be Miss Jean", grins Bobby stupidly at Amara, "Yes, I must say, you don't look a day over twenty"

"….I'm sixteen", says Amara.

Jubes smacks Bobby with her fan again, clearly enjoying having an excuse to do so.

"Smile, Darling", whispers Amara to Warren, who is looking glum.

With a great amount of effort, Warren manages something between a sneer and a malicious grin.

"…That'd scare babies away, easy", says Pyro.

"Well, hello", says Warren through his 'smile', "What a pleasure. Welcome to our home"

"Oh, thank you", giggles Jubes, fanning herself, "Oh, sexy Warren"

"…..Standing right here", says Bobby.

"We'll be taking tea in the west drawing room", says Amara, leading them off, "Oh, do come this way, it's just through here"

"Oh, I love what you've done with the place", says Jubes, "Who is your decorator?"

The 'parents' walk off, leaving Scott standing in the hall.

"…..Am I actually needed at all for this arranged marriage?", asks Scott.

He sighs, looking at an old piano with a single piece of heather in a vase on top. He plays a single note, before sitting down, playing happily.

Can I play the piano anymore?, he sings.

Of course you can!, sings Pyro.

Well, I couldn't before!, sings Scott. (1)

From up in her room, Jean hears the piano playing, going down to investigate, seeing Scott playing a semi-funeral march.

"Oh, that's nice", she mutters, walking over to him.

Scott finally realises she's there and squeaks, jumping up, knocking the piano chair over and making the vase fall down. He catches the vase before it breaks, looking sheepishly at Jean.

"Do forgive me", he says shyly.

"You play beautifully", smiles Jean.

"I…I do apologise, Miss Grey", stammers Scott, "How rude of me to…er..well…Excuse me"

He picks up the piano stool, going an interesting shade of scarlet.

"Mother won't let me play the piano", says Jean, "Music is 'improper' for a young lady. Too passionate, she says"

"Oh, I hope she gives him a heart attack", grins Pyro, watching as Scott gets redder.

"If I ask, Miss Grey", says Scott nervously, "..where is your chaperon?"

"Perhaps, in view of the circumstances", smirks Jean, "you could call me Jean"

"The circumstances of getting' hitched and all", chuckled Pyro.

"Yes, well, of course", Scot laughs nervously, "Jean"

"Yes, Scott?", asks Jean, cocking her head to the side.

Scott stammers, wringing the tie around his neck as he does so.

"Tomorrow, we are to be m…m…m.."

"Married", says Jean happily.

"Yes", says Scott nervously, "Ha…married"

"…I'm beginning to see why it took these two so long to hook up", says Pyro.

Jean smiles softly, ignoring Pyro.

"Since I was a child, I've dreamt of my wedding day", she says, sitting down at the piano, "I always hoped to find someone I was deeply in love with. Someone to spend the rest of my life with. Silly isn't it?"

"Yes, silly", says Scott, "Ha"

"……How do you EVER get dates?", asks Pyro.

Scott's eyes widen as he realises what he just said.

"No. No, not at all", he says, trying to dig himself out of his hole, "No"

He sits next to her on the piano, knocking over the vase.

"Oh, dear, I'm sorry", he says, picking up the vase.

Jean smiles, handing him the flower. Just as he takes it, the parents arrive.

"What impropriety is this?", gasps Amara.

"…Not like they were going at it on the piano or anything", says Pyro, then coughs, "not that I've ever done anything like that myself…"

"You shouldn't be alone together!", snaps Amara, "Here it is, one minute before five and you're not at the rehearsal!. Pastor Apocalypse is waiting, come at once!"

",……You made Apocalypse a pastor?", grins Pyro, flipping through the script, "boy, I really should read this in advance!"

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(1) – If you didn't catch on, this is not a song from the movie. It's Dr Zaius, from the Simpsons.

Oh yes, he is. Next time, a wedding rehearsal goes wrong. Do review, until next time…