Okay, here is chapter three and do not forget to give me a review as well! P.S. I am doing POV switchs so look for this symbol. (-)


True Endless Love

Chapter Three

Waiting and Pain

'When was the last time I cried?' The question ran through my head. 'Of course, when I almost lost Jade to death.'

I wanted to cry now, how much pain must I go through to get to Jade, for him to notice that I have always been patiently waiting for him?

()

"Jade, I'm home." I stepped in through the door. It was about to rain and when I got home, I saw Jade with another woman in his arms and made an excuse to leave immediately from the front door.

"Ah, I forgot next months lessons in the office, I'll be back by dinner." I smiled at him and nodded in her direction. I shut the wood panel softly behind me and leaned against it. "What number is this? Its not like that I don't care about Jade...I just do..."

Water began to pour, soaking my cloths and ranking-stripped collar, I bit my lip.

"No, I must not cry. Now is not the time."

I heard a high pitched laughter and Jade's after. I ran, somewhere I can feel more relaxed. Still open shops and restaurants passed by in a blur as rain pelted my face, stinging my eyes and cooling my skin even more. There was this broken wall before me and I sat down with my back against it as I curled up, hiding my face in my hands.

What seemed like hours was only one or two, Jade found me and he leaned over, the umbrella blocking the rain from hitting me.

"Lotus, lets go home, you'll catch a cold sitting there." I pulled away from his gentle touch to my shoulder and burst into full speed, past him, our shoulders brushing ever so slightly as I moved away from his second attempt. "Lotus! Lotus!"

Where I ended up next was the playground in the park, my eyes became solemn, I only have memories of watching him play. I sat on a swing at the far end, my heart...aching ever so in the bitter cold. Just sitting.

(-)

"Lotus!" I didn't even have time to catch her as she took off, the umbrella rolled to the left then stopped, the handle in the air as the bowel caught water, filling gradually till it spilled over. I let myself become soaked, water dripped from my hair, chin and nose as I stared in the direction Lotus had disappeared in. She seemed...no, Lotus is terribly upset.

"What is making you act this way?" I asked, my words falling like the rain around me. I picked up the watery object, dumping its contents and collapsed it. I sighed, "Wet is wet."

()

I stepped back into the house.

"Did you find her?" I shook my head at the woman who sat on the stair steps. "Lotus...she's lucky to have someone like you. Someone like you to care for her, I may not know her at all but I have never seen such a sad look in her eyes, like they were falling into darkness."

"What are you implying Aeolian?" I crossed my arms and leaned against the door, the water dripping into a puddle at my feet.

"Lotus...she has such strong feelings for you, I think that seeing me, chased her away. She looked heart broken and painfully hurt. The tone in her voice, very sorrowful..."

I stopped her with a look.

"Meaning that it has something to do with the woman I bring home?"

"I mean she cares for you a whole, great deal. Loves you unconditionally." She spat, annoyed at me. "You need to go and find her! Don't let Lotus hurt herself! Go and make amends with her! She is your responsibility!"

In a flurry, Aeolian grabbed my arm and dragged me out the door and down the street, shoving me roughly in the back.

"Go find Lotus! I am going back to my home, I'll be fine! You should worry over her, with this weather, she'll become ill. Lotus is beyond fragile!" With that final note, she stalked off.

(-)

Night time had fallen and I looked up into the still rainy sky. Then dropped my head to continue to look at nothing. This was so painful.

(-)

Lotus, where are you? I stared at the ceiling above me then turned onto my side, drawing the covers over my shoulder. Midnight came and I thought I had heard Lotus screaming from her nightmare, lightning flashed outside the window and thunder shook the house. Storms like this only made her nightmares all the more worse. Making my way over to the door that joined our bedrooms together, I went in and stopped short. Lotus's bed was still neatly made, no indention in the covers, nor was she on top of it. She was still missing. Another wave went on outside.

"Lotus...how scared are you?" I paused at the question then ran to get changed. "What an idiot I have been."

Through every street and ally way, behind empty stalls and on all door steps. No where!

"Damn, where did you go Lotus?" I pounded the flat side of my fist to a wall that surrounded some house. "Lotus...you really are scared."

(-)

I curled up tightly in one of the playgrounds tunnels.

"Jade...please find me." I screamed at a resounding boom, shivering in my freezing cloths and trying to block out the sound and flashes. I didn't like being alone, it was painful.

(-)

This was starting to get frustrating, Lotus is still missing! Where could she have gone too? I checked the office, the training field, the Intelligence Division, every where in the Military Base. Still, no one has seen her, it has already been two full days and I couldn't find the time to sleep (much less to eat), to let my mind relax deemed harder to do when I was thinking of Lotus. The image of her face when she woke up from her nightmares on the darkest and stormiest of nights, kept appearing over and over again. If only her...no, I promised never to bring that incident up, what we had found that day on her birthday.

"Lotus..." Grinding my teeth together, the weathers onslaught hadn't stopped. There was only one place I hadn't looked, the Palace but knowing her, she wouldn't dare enter with out me, even if the Emperor had summoned her alone. Lotus really had an affinity against him.

"Colonel Curtiss, what has you up this late?" I turned and faced Lord Sessamen.

"Lotus, she..."

"So your HC Major has gone missing?" He blew smoke from his pipe after taking a puff. "Are you positive that you looked everywhere?"

"Yes Sir, I have."

"Do not be deceived, she is in the most simplest of all places, hiding out in the open, you are thinking too hard of all of the most possible places she could be." He stroked his white beard. "Where is the only place in your time that she hasn't taken part in? Hmm..." He looked at me through small, round glasses. "Meditate on that." He turned to leave. "You can thank me once you have found her. You should already know this, Lotus is really a very fragile person."

There was no need to tell me this, I have already seen how fragile she is, it just took me longer to find out. The clouds grew a little lighter, the sun was rising but the rain didn't stop, this was the third day. I sat down on one of the benches that faced the open ocean that was encased the water fall wall. The least place that I would look, what is it and where is it? It became suddenly quiet even though thunder rang off, I heard birds in the tree behind me, singing to ease the fear...birds...park...the park! The only place Lotus didn't bother to play with Nephry and I, she just watched us from a distance and back then, she also had that sad look in her eye. The same sad look, waiting for us to invite her to play along with us.

"Lotus, is that where you are? Is that where you ran too?" I rose and proceeded to the park. "Hold on, Lotus."

()

I searched for hours. Was I missing something? What am I missing? Yes it was in the park but where exactly in the park. Lotus curled up in a ball, her chin to her knees as she sat against a tree trunk, her breath showing in a small fog cloud, there were other children running around...climbing, jumping, swinging...

"The jungle gym! Her feet would lead her there!" I took off, almost tripping over a rock, I caught myself by doing a one handed back spring to regain my balance on my feet. I saw the swings, empty and the slides, empty and the structure, empty but something out of the corner of my eye, in one of the tunnels. White, Malkuth blue, black and tan...Lotus.

"Lotus, Lotus!" I scrambled up the stairs and crawled in. She lied there with a scared and pained look on her face, her skin so icy cold.

"Jade...it hurts..." Lotus's hand covered her heart, then I saw her eyes, they were really falling into darkness as her breath could be seen.

"Lotus, lets go home." I smiled gently then picked up her shivering and damp frame, holding tightly to my own body to warm her up. Once I got to the house, I sent one of the soldiers to get Major Shei.

"She's in hypothermia, her body has dropped beyond her regular temperature." Shei said after she tucked the covers (and several blankets) up to Lotus's chin. "Any longer and she would've went into a comatose state. "I recommend anything that can keep her warm. Anything! I'll be back to check on her tomorrow, and Colonel, you look ragged from running around, you get some rest too. I'll show myself out the door." And left.

I shrugged as she mocked my outward appearance but I felt haggard and went to go change. I slid next to Lotus and took her in my arms. Shei did say anything. A blistery wake up call as soon as our skin touched, I couldn't even feel her pulse, it was very feint as it coursed with a bone chilling cold. Damn this weather, it always rained during winter, bringing the arctic air from the South shore of Keterburg's main island, _. The only thing that got close to snow was sleet, but it melted instantly when the sun came. Pulling the blankets and covers over our heads, locking in the immense heat that I radiated that Lotus said that I have. I rubbed Lotus's arms, back and neck, trying to stimulate warmth.

She was severely shivering for hours till it became little quirks here and there. Lotus's once damp hair was now dry, right down to the root. What I was more worried about was her core, how deep has the cold penetrated?

"Jade..." Lotus's voice was small and barely audible but I heard it clearly and brought her closer.

"Just sleep." I returned ever so softly. "I am here."

Her hands shakily slid around my chest and grasped the back of my shirt. "I...was...so...scared..."

"Enough, sleep now, your tired and in the morning, I'll have breakfast cooked and waiting as always." I soothed. "You can tell me when you are ready but once you are better."

"Thank...you..." Her words cracked as it faded.

I never knew how much trouble she could cause me to worry over her, to keep me from eating and sleeping. I am thinking that I am the one hurting her the most, putting away her female problems till she was an adult, perhaps she was an adult in the beginning. How long has she been suffering like this, holding in her emotions?

I felt tired and drifted off shortly after Lotus.

()

"Wake up Colonel!" There was a loud voice in my ear but I ignored it till I felt something poking me in the back. "Wake up! I am here to check on Lotus! As promised!"

I released Lotus and rolled from the bed.

"A rather rude way to wake your superior officer."

"Come off it!" Shei snapped then got straight to work once I was clearly a yard from the bed. What was more amazing was that Lotus was still sleeping, right through the yelling. "Nothing seems to be wrong except her inner body temperature, her core is still not yet thawed, she could freeze again if its not taken care of." Shei turned a sparing eye at me. "You did the most, finish it. And since she is out, I have every right to mock and make fun of you till she regains consciences."

I leaned against the wall, ignoring the last jab.

"You know, I can never tell what she is thinking or how she is feeling, I blame myself for not trying to open her up more, to get her to talk about her emotions but there is this. Lotus hasn't stopped crying on the inside, sobbing and suffering as she waits endlessly for that one thing that can end her pain." Shei brushed a black strand from Lotus's sleeping face. "She waits for those certain words that can end the rain in her heart. I can't say them for her, for they are for the someone in my life. Her someone is you, Colonel, I can only say this for my own selfishness. What you think that you know all about her, you could be lying to yourself, even I still don't know all about Lotus till she tells me."

I close my eyes. How is it possible?

"Lotus keeps her pain, sadness and frustration locked up, in turn, making her very fragile and broken. It only take's one thing done many times to send her running but running to where? That is the greatest question, where can you find someone who has no home to run to? Where can they seek peace and sanctuary? Lotus...She has none of these except you and this house you both live in, this is her home and you, her most precious person." She returned the covers to Lotus's chin. "She found her home, her sanctuary no longer a place of peace and ran, the person she trusted the most with her heart doing something to release that flood of suffering, it is then she can't even speak those words she has been trying to say."

Shei stood then turned once she was half way out the door.

"When she wakes, listen to what she has to say, take heed to it so you can prevent her from running again to a place that is not home."

I didn't move till the front door was closed and retook my place by Lotus's side. The last time I saw her suffering was when her family...no, I will not bring it up.

(-)

"Where am I?" I questioned when I woke or what seemed like I was awake...it was pitch black and freezing and wet, a sudden clash of lightning cracked before me and I covered my ears as the thunder reverberated through out my body.

"Wake up?" My eyes shot up and I faced myself. "Ah, whats the matter Lotus?"

A child version of me, the me that had I forgotten.

"Come play with me! I have been waiting for you to get here."

My hand was grabbed and I began to run from the black to two trees, a peach and a cherry. "What-Lo..."

"Lotus, you have forgotten about me, the reason why your alive and these two trees, remember why you need to be alive." She hung from a branch and laughed, "come play with me!"

"I guess I can play with you for a while." I shrugged.

"Yay! You can climb the peach tree there! The fruit is ripe enough to eat!" A cherry stem stuck out of her mouth.

"If you say so..." In one bound, I was in the tree.

"Oh, oh, oh! Climb to the top and pick the fruit up there!" She laughed.

"Okay..." So I began to climb, what looked like a beautiful tree soon turned into an arduous climb to the top.

"That's it! Your almost there!" My child-self kept on encouraging me.

The further up I went, the more dense it became, my hair became snagged several times, my face and arms where soon covered in cuts and my knees bruised. I almost lost my balance three times. Why was I here? Climbing a peach tree? Why am I?

"Keep on going! The top is near!" Was that me? "Keep on going!" It is, I was encouraging myself to keep on going. "Don't stop, I am almost there, a few more feet!"

Then I saw it, the light above the branches. A single white peach, ripe and waiting to be picked and eaten. I took the fruit in my hands and bit into it.

"I did it. Jade, I did it. I am alive because your are my need to be."

"See there you are, your alive for that single reason." My child-self appeared before me.

"The peach tree, I planted it for it reminded me of Jade, his personality. Strong with a soft self."

"Now, once your done with that peach, wake up and say what you have always wanted to say to Jade. Let him know how you feel." She vanished a flurry of light that the peach absorbed. "You are alive!"

I finished the fruit and closed my eyes, when I opened them, Jade had his arms wrapped around me.

"So, do you have something to say to me?" He asked kindly.

"After I have eaten something and get some water in me, I will." I answered.

"Okay." I received a gentle smile.

"Jade, this may sound harsh and bitter when I say this..." His hands rested on my knees, I have never seen him this eager. "But, I watch out for you, stop with the women you bring home. Its unnerving when I see it...I just can't get my words out...even now its hard for me too say it." Jade wiped a tear from the corner of my eye. "I don't want you to have a reputation like the child on the throne for being a ladies man on the side! Its unbecoming for a Colonel in the Military. I don't want some noble family suing you for taking her one day against her will, forcing you to retire..."

(-)

I listened, so this is what she had to say to me...I rather liked it, being told by Lotus. I cut her off by giving her a simple kiss. "Thank you, Lotus..."

"No fair! You got the moment and I-well I'm sitting here...trying not to cry..." Then that was it, tears poured from her eyes. "You big dummy! Your so mean! Idiot!" I let her call me names and when she had finished, I kissed her again, starting a another stream from her. "Moron...Idiot..." Lotus slowly simmered down till she was in sobs and I gave another kiss. "Idiot."

"I know that I am, call me one as long as you like." I cradle her close to me and bring us back down to the bed. "I don't mind."

"Idiot, idiot, idiot..." Lotus kept on whispering into my chest, her salty tears staining my shirt, I didn't mind, as long as she was awake and breathing. "Idiot...idiot...idiot..."

I have to give my regards to Shei and Sesemann later on but this is no longer my bigger problem. Perhaps, I have a better understanding of Lotus's feeling's now, I made her worry over me the most. Maybe I have always been her constant worry, what ever the case maybe, I think that I can't get her to stop it, its hers alone.

As I continue to lie there with a now sleeping Lotus, when did she ever started to make me worry about her?

*Flashback Mode Activated*

Lotus lay sound asleep but she was whimpering every few seconds and water droplets sat in the corners of her eyes. Was she in this much pain? I dab up the liquid but more appear. I sigh and leave the room.

"How is she?" I cast a sparing glance at Jasper Cadogan.

"The same." I answer as I push my glasses back up. "There must be a reason why she wants me to take care of her."

"That aside...the amount of blood loss...to collapse after three days..." His voice shook in breaks.

"What the case might be, Lotus doesn't want you to heal her and its her reason. She has always been that way, taking the grunt." I didn't want Jasper to bring up last week. Never. "Your released for the day, we'll see if she wakes up tomorrow."

"Yes sir." He leaves and I enter our room. Barely a few seconds in and I see blood staining the sheets under her.

"You moved again, Lotus..." I gingerly pick her up to change the bandages and the bed sheets.

I still couldn't help it, staring at the deep gashes on her back, to close all of her Fon Slots and redirect the Seventh Fonon...I want to know more about her. I touch my chest, a pale, silver scar ran down my sternum. "Why?"

The next few days progressed, but Lotus didn't wake up. It was at night when a shrill scream brought me from my slumber to find Lotus thrashing.

"Jaaaaaaadddddeeeeee..."

"Lotus! Calm down, Lotus!" I gave a solid slap to my superiors cheek, her eyelids open ever so slowly as I keep her pinned to the bed.

"Jade..." I release her after seeing her stricken look. "I have...something to say..."

I shush Lotus with a finger to her lips. "Not another word, I heard you that night; now, let me ask you. Will you forgive me? Will you stay by my side? No matter where I go? No matter how much I change?"

"Yes! Yes, yes, yes and yes forever! Its because...because..."

"You love me..." I whisper, hoping to quiet her even more. "I am not going to stop you from crying, you have always wanted to cry, they are your tears."

Lotus beautiful iris's vanish as she choked a sob. "Before I do...I will make a promise to never speak about Professor Nebilim, to never bring up her name. I don't want to...I just can't lose you!" A tear slipped past and rolled down her cheek.

"I promise to never bring up what happened last week. I want to learn how to live, I want to know more about you, your family." Then I did something that I hadn't done in a long time, a simple kiss to seal our promises to the other. It was then, Lotus finally let the tears she had held back, break free.

"Now, lets get those bandages changed, Lotus." I hold her trembling frame, racked with sobs and relief.

"Yes Jade..." Lotus's thin fingers clutch the back of my shirt as I replace the wraps.

I stare at my glass of scotch. "She's awake, Jasper." He takes the seat next to me.

"That's good to hear." He breathes. "Major Lotus is one impossible person to deal with."

"Yes she is." I could only agree. "Lotus has the affinity for the Seventh Fonon."

Jasper jumped. "W-what?"

"But her body structure is different, it heals from the inside out. Any outside help has no affect."

"No wonder she snapped at me, saying, 'Don't touch me!'"

"You could say that she took great care to hide her Fonon Frequency this whole time. She didn't want you to pick up on it." I picked up the glass, examining the melting ice before it taking a sip. "Eight long years and she used a low dose in an Arte when it seemed the right time." I replace my drink.

The bartender leaned over the counter. "What would you like sir?"

"Brandy with milk." Jasper took an order then returned to our conversation. "Then explain why?"

"Lotus...Its in her blood, passed down from one generation to the next. She knew that even with the machine shutting down, that the Fonon's would still be toxic to others and absorbed them from the source." I almost stopped as the next sentence rolled off of my tongue ever so easily. "Putting herself in high risk to save us, mostly, me." The scar throbbed with an even duller ache behind it. "Lotus healed me to the point that I would have this as a warning, to finally expose her true self to me."

"The Major's Arte scores were above commended, to deal such damage with a little attack."

"Yes, at her age, Lotus kept up with me. To think, a Superior Officer would let me get by with murder, she knew that I knew that it was." Jasper almost fell out off of his bar stool as I said this, surprised in a way, Lotus has told him. My attention was moved from my once was assistant to a soft tink from my glass, a reminder to take a sip, I reluctantly did so.

"Field Marshall knew also but didn't...but the Emperor was funding us."

"With Saphir gone on his own ambitions, out of the country so he can't break any laws..."

"Its for the better of Lotus, to give her time to heal with out any noise, I have to return the favor back for a life time."

"How are you going to do that?"

"Its my secret and speaking of which, I have to leave, the child is here." I downed my glass in four gulps, dropped thirty gald on the counter and slink along the back wall, avoiding His Majesty all together and vanished down the stairs.

I carried a box under my elbow, Lotus would love this but she would do some modifications. I found her asleep, leaning over, I kissed her good night and hid the box in the bottom of my foot locker.

Irritating scratching noise caused me to roll over and notice Lotus's light on, the soft blue hue glowed from behind the curtain that surrounded her bed. I rise from my own to check on her.

"Lotus?" I draw the obstruction back, she was propped against her pillow, a drawing pencil and sketch book her hand's. "Lotus..."

Lotus's eye's had a solid look of remembrance as her right hand flew across the page, the drawing slowly taking form. A wall in the distance, a fence line to the right, a pond in the foreground and two tree's, an peach and an cherry with ripe fruit, their branches and root's tangled together. Two people side by side holding objects and real expressions on the face's. Fascinated as color began to blend, delicate fingers moving the pastel's over the page, making one color darker in one area and lighter in another. Lotus and I.

"Lotus?" I sat on the bed side, snapping her from her trance.

"These...are my wishes, I draw them..." A signature and a date was added next to the roots of the peach tree. "And if one of them comes true, I'll frame it. So far..." A distance crossed her face. "None, of them has came true...its a little frustrating but I'll still wait."

I wonder how much longer she was going to suffer, waiting endlessly for those wishes. Lotus closed the book and reached up to wipe a tear away, I beat her to it; startled at my affection.

"Lotus, you need sleep," I slipped the book from underneath her hands as I eased her down and under the covers. 'It's the middle of the night." Then put the charcoal and pastel box on the shelf behind her pillow.

"Your right." Lotus droned then was out. I kiss her then turn the light off.

I stare at the book in my hands. "How many wishes do you have, Lotus?" I whispered. I already saw one but to look at them all, I'd be intruding in on her privet life. The moons light cast a pale but strong glow on the black embossed cover. I glance at Lotus through the slight part in her curtains, so very quiet and painless expression, very serene. Not saying a word as I pulled it from her fingers, as if she knew that I was going to look at it, giving me the decision to do so or not.

I flipped it upside down and slid it under my bed.

Some days later, I helped ease Lotus into the tub and her grip on my arm was beyond strong, she restrained from breaking the bone.

"Tch..." Lotus sharply gasped as the herbs hit her back. "Ha...ah..."

"Lotus..."

"You will join me!" She darkly said what I thought wasn't possible from her.

"Yes Ma'am, but I can't change with you still holding onto me." She let go and latched onto the tub rim.

"Hurry." Earning a sharp hiss when I didn't make it to the door fast enough. My first order in a while from her.

Lotus's cold breathe on my collarbone was heavy as I continued to pour the herbal water onto her. Her arms lay limply on my shoulder's and her hands locked behind my neck. I stopped to ler her relax fully against my chest.

"Lotus?"

"Yes?"

"I owe you my life and I need...no, will try to make it up to you. Firstly, if you permit me, can I take you to dinner once you have healed over?"

"But..." Her face buried into my neck. "Yes, you can take me to dinner."

I close my eyes and relax even further, continuing the pour of water on her back.

"My what have we here?" I sigh as Lotus and I appear from the bathroom to find His Majesty on our room. "Getting it on in there are you?"

"I'm sorry, so sorry Major Snow-Heart...I tried to stop him..." Jasper was sweating up a storm as he peered around the door frame. "But he insisted..."

I look at Lotus, her head bowed to hide her eyes.

"Lotus..." I was cut off when she kicked Peony out the door and to the far wall, narrowly missing Jasper.

"Out." Her voice firm and her eyes held a mad expression. "Cadogan, you didn't see anything."

"YES MA'AM!" Jasper jumped, scared out of his own wits.

I almost shivered at hearing Lotus in that dark and cold voice as she shut the door and locked it. I briefly touch her shoulder and she sank into me.

"Lotus?"

"Bed...now...tired..." I could only nod at this, wasting her energy to send the child flying, I gently place Lotus on the bed and tuck her in. "Stay...with me...for a...while..."

"Yes Ma'am." I take her hand, the icy chill ran through my veins, Lotus truly was tired and worn out. I watch her till she falls asleep. "Rest well, Lotus."

*Flashback Mode Deactivated*

That's right, to be able to learn how to worry over someone else besides me. Lotus is ranked number one in my list, but, its hard to forget that I have learned to truly and deeply love her. She stole my heart since we meet all those years ago but now, I have to wait for her to accept my love. Its because that I love her, I worry over her.

"Rest well, Lotus." I whisper and too fall alseep.


Well, if you guys are gamers and could possibly do me a favor cause I'm stuck playing my other 50-some games, grab Ketterburg's main island name. Its simple, land on the island with Ketterburg and open up the menu, in the bottom left or the bar on the bottom, there should be something like location or contenant. Then give me a review with the name. I will gladly change it!

Working on Chapter 4, Hang tight! Its taking some time, forgive me.

It will be a mystery my loyal fans!