~ Part III ~

"Sooooo…"

They had just come home and Clarke had hoped her friends would let her off the hook for once. She was wrong. As soon as the door closed behind her, Octavia pulled her to the couch and Raven sat down in front of her on the coffee table.

"Spill. Since when do we formulate new laws?" They grinned.

"Let it go. I thought it was the right thing to say." Clarke defended her decision whilst taking off her coat.

"Has Lexa's little knight stunt touched your sleeping heart, princess?" Raven and Octavia copied her shedding their winter attire.

"It was nice of her to step in." Clarke evaded eye contact and played with her fingers. The truth was, she couldn't stop thinking about how hot Lexa had looked when she had confronted the creepy perv. She had been all fierce eyes and taught muscles. She also couldn't stop marvelling at the feeling of the brunette's soft skin.

"We were right behind you. No need for her to get involved."

"First of all, O, it's her job. Secondly, you know I won't let you get involved and possibly hurt."

"Is it?" The smaller brunette raised an eyebrow at her friend's words ignoring the second part of the blonde's explanation. "Anya had said she had been off for the day."

"Yeah, no job-bound duty to safe and protect." Raven added to the comment.

"Have you met her? She's a walking protector. Wherever she goes the need to save people is ingrained in her body, soul and mind." Clarke shrugged. "She did what she thought was the right thing to do and so did I."

"You my dear friend are head over heels for this woman." Octavia patted the blonde's knee. "You should talk to her. For real. Tell her what she needs to know about you and stop punishing yourself. The least you could get out it is a good lay. Although, I don't think Lexa would do anything without serious intent. Or anyone..." She trailed off with a wicked smile.

Clarke glared at her and shifted on the couch.

"Or tell Anya to tell her." Raven piped up, reading a barrage of text messages on her phone. "According to her, Lexa is asking a million and one question about you and my lover finds it difficult to keep avoiding her."

"I can't just walk up to her and tell her things."

"You did hear me say, she's asking about you?" Raven paused to read. "You stitched her lip?" She asked incredulously, finally looking up at her friend.

"Well, it would have healed with a scar and I don't want those lips to scar." Clarke blushed.

"You don't want… Clarke, for someone who is so adamant on letting Lexa think she's right with her assumptions about you being an easy, dumb Barbie, you've just given her reason to doubt."

"I couldn't not help her." Clarke burst out angrily.

"No one says that," Octavia sighed and boxed her friend gently on the upper arm, "but the problem is you should tell her about your life. Dreams. Interests. General background information."

"Yeah Clarke." Raven contributed with a nod.

"Why are you guys so pro Lexa now? You wanted to kick her ass just a few days ago. You were angry on my behalf. What happened with that fury?" The blonde asked upset.

"Well we-"

"You heard Anya. She's convinced Lexa likes you and regrets deeply what happened." Raven interrupted. "Don't get me wrong. I'm not calling for peace I'm merely rooting for justice for you. As soon as Lexa learns more about you, she'll give you the respect and admiration you deserve."

"Couldn't have said it any better. All I want at that moment in time is for you to be happy. Do I see her being the reason for your happiness? No idea. You liked her once." Octavia nodded along her words.

Silent fell over the three friends. Blue eyes wandered from brown ones to another pair of blue orbs and down to her hands knitted painfully tight in her lab.

"Take her out for dinner or whatever." Raven interrupted the quiet.

"What? No way." Clarke shook her head vehemently. "This is not happening."

"Yes way."

"Anya thinks Lexa will come to talk to you."

"Unless she's coming with a genuine apology first, one I actually feel is sincere, she shouldn't bother." Clarke declared with finality and stood up. "What we're having for dinner?"

Octavia and Raven exchange a glance and simultaneously shook their heads. "I don't get how you can be so strict with yourself."

"I'm not strict, I just know what I'm worth and my current job is already degrading me. I don't need to add to that."

"Fine." Raven stood up and followed the rest of the group into the kitchen, where they settled down for a quick cheese on toast dinner.

Lexa had been off work for two days. The main reason had been her headache, but she also needed to fill out forms and reports at the police station further down the valley. She had been silently reading under the watchful eye of the officer on duty when she looked up.

"Gustus, does he really thinks he can get away with calling it self-defence?" She asked surprised after reading the man's statement.

"Well, he tries. Your wounds and his are thankfully supporting your side of the story. Besides, I doubt you would hurt anyone on purpose."

"Right." Lexa whispered, signing her own statement. "So, what's happening now?" She asked louder.

"Well, do you want to press charges for assault?"

"I wouldn't if it had only been me, but earlier he had verbally harassed the staff in our mountain bar and I think it's his way of talking to women. So based on that…" Lexa scratched her neck, contemplating. "Yeah. I do."

"In that case, can you get me the names of the staff? It would help if they come down here too to file a report."

"I can ask them if they want. We're not on good terms, so I'm not sure they would want to help out though."

"You helped them." Gustus smiled. "I'm sure they would want to return the favour."

"Unlikely." She sighed. "

The officer furrowed his brow at her words and watched her biting her lower lip. "Shall we have a tea at my desk?" He offered suddenly sensing the trouble behind the young woman's eyes.

After a moment of contemplation Lexa decided a warm drink and some fatherly advice might be the right thing. "Sure, lead the way."

Gustus was not family in a blood related way, but he had been one of the police officers who had volunteered whenever they had been looking for lost hikers or fallen climbers. They had become close friends over the years. "So, what's going on?" He asked while pouring hot water into two cups.

"There's this woman -"

"Why am I not surprised." He interrupted her with booming laughter. Lexa blushed furiously at his words. "Well, go on. Tell me about her." He encouraged, setting the steaming mug in front of her and flopping down into his chair.

"She's…" Lexa started, licking her dry lips nervously. "I think I've been the worst I could have been to her."

"Explain." He nodded without judging and Lexa realised she had never given Clarke a chance to explain. She had judged and assumed without knowing her.

"Well, every winter she's coming to work in that igloo bar on top of Mount Weather for the past few years. She's gorgeous and really, really beautiful and all, but she lets people, mainly men, ogle her and lust after her to get them to spend insane amounts of money on alcohol. She and her two colleagues, well friends, don't care about the aftermath of excessive drinking. This is then my problem how to get everyone to safety and it's so frustrating."

"Let me guess. You made it clear to her how irresponsible it is to serve alcohol to intoxicated people and set down to discuss what can be done to limit the danger?"

"Not quite." Lexa winced. "I called her stupid names and accused her of sleeping around as well as being ignorant about the safety of her patrons." The brunette let her head hang in shame. She had been such an asshole to Clarke.

"Now why would you do that?" He poked her in the thigh nearest to him to have her look at him. "The Lexa I know would have been polite and explaining." Despite the seriousness of his words, a small smile graced his features.

Lexa rolled her eyes and shifted in her chair, clutching the hot beverage tightly in her cold hands. "I think… I don't know." She lowered her eyes once more.

"Yes you do." Gustus whispered knowingly. "Be honest."

She looked up and studied his kind eyes and encouraging expression. After another few seconds of silence she inhaled a deep breath, clenched her jaw once and admitted. "I'm jealous of all the guys who get to touch her. I wish she would do something more covered and less exposing." She rushed the words out and took a sip of her tea to get rid of the connotation of them. Jealousy usually stems from only one source. You want what others have.

The police officer nodded slowly, pursing his mouth in contemplation of Lexa's confession. He knew her well enough to know he didn't need to make it more obvious, so instead he asked something else. "Why is she coming year after year to bartend the igloo?"

Lexa looked owlishly at the man. "I don't know." She said blinking rapidly.

"You didn't ask?"

"No." He stared at her for a moment and she sunk even deeper into her seat. "Don't even start. Anya has been bugging me over the very same fact for ages." She mumbled in response to his surprised silence.

"Ok. Well, is she the owner of the business?"

"I…" It caught her off-guard. "I don't think she is."

"Do you think she makes the rules?"

"Well, if it isn't her business, most likely not."

"So serving alcohol is her job." It wasn't a question. It was a statement driven home with enough burn to leave scars.

Lexa clenched her jaw once more blushing scarlet. She hated being called out. She hated everything about this situation with Clarke. "She doesn't have to do it so suggestively dressed though." She spat out angrily.

Gustus shushed her irritation with an raised eyebrow before he calmly went on. "Do you know how they are paid?"

Lexa simply shook her head. "I told you, I haven't really taken the time to talk to her."

"So, let me get this straight." He laughed at his lame joke, she forced a grin despite her miserable mood. "She started working on Mount Weather a few years ago and instead of introducing yourself properly and making friends and getting to know her, you made it your mission to make her life uncomfortable so she would quit and start doing something more worthy." He said it with so much sarcasm Lexa felt it dripping onto her with every single word drowning her in the painful truth.

"Um…" She stuttered ashamed.

"And all that because you're in love with her…" He added in a softer voice.

Her eyes quickly snapped to the pair in front of her. "What? No, no. No one's talking love Gus." Lexa corrected immediately with panic in her voice.

"Calm down, I won't tell." He sipped his drink and studied his friend. "So, this woman is the one who got verbally assaulted?"

Lexa slumped back again in her chair caressing the mug close to her mouth breathing in deeply. She was thankful for the change of subject. "Yeah."

"You jumped in to help her and instead of a grateful thank you peck you cashed in a hit right in the kisser." Leave it to her friend to circle back to the agonising topic.

Lexa sighed for what felt like the millionth time since she had agreed to the tea. "She wouldn't have thanked me like that."

"You don't know."

"She hates me."

"You don't know." Gustus repeated. He sat up in his chair and rolled closer to his desk eyes never leaving the young troubled woman. He nodded to himself before picking up a form amidst his cluttered workspace. "Here's a wild thought. Why don't you talk to her. Use this police form to get her to meet with you and go from there." He held out the papers.

Lexa eyes them warily. "She doesn't have to come here to do it in person?"

"Make sure she signs her statement and I trust you to be honest."

Lexa contemplated his words for a moment. It would take the pressure of finding a good enough reason off her. It wouldn't be too weird of a matter to meet up with Clarke. "Yeah ok. Sure." She plucked the papers out of his fingers and folded them once before placing them carefully in her messenger bag.

"You know Lex, she must be special for you to lose your head over her. Promise me you'll try to get to know her." He was serious and Lexa felt herself nodding even though the simple thought of spending time with Clarke made her incredibly nervous.

"Yeah ok." She repeated and stood up. "See you some time on the slopes, old man." She grasped his lower arm in lieu of an old-fashioned handshake and clapped him hard on the back.

"See you Lexa." She was almost through the door when she heard her name being called. "Oh and Lex…" He waited for her to turn around. "Don't deny what your heart wants."

She grimaced at the officer standing next to the door and sent a glare Gustus' way before leaving to the laughter of the two men.

Hi Clarke. This is Lexa. I was wondering if you fancy a beer. I need to talk to you about your possible involvement in pressing charges for the assault. Let me know. Please.

Clarke woke up to see the text message and stared at her phone for a long moment. She was torn between looking forward to the prospect of sharing a moment with Lexa in a civilized manner and scowling at the woman for thinking her previous behaviour had been excused, because she had put herself in harm's way to keep Clarke unscathed. However, her sleep-muddled brain didn't quite get the memo to glare and she found herself smiling at the screen for a second before she huffed out in annoyance at her own inability to stay focused. The last time she had seen Lexa had been when she had stitched up her lip. After that, the brunette had seemed to have vanished. She had eventually overheard Raven telling Octavia that Lexa had been off sick. Clarke had tried her best not to seem too eager to hear about the whereabouts of the infuriating brunette. The teasing had been enough after she had imposed the new law. If she had shown worry for the girl, they might have gone on a field trip. She just hoped Lexa hadn't suffered too much.

She sat up in her bed contemplating her next move. Seeing her would help ease her mind on Lexa's wellbeing. Clarke softly tapped her phone against her chin, but after a moment she decided she needed to wake up first before agreeing to something she might not want in the got up to ready herself to face another day of awful people, stupid drinks and freaking coldness.

"Hi there trooper."

Clarke looked up, meeting Anya's gaze over the kitchen counter.

"You're an awfully chipper version of the Anya I know so early in the morning. Coming or going?" Anya's filthy grin made her realise her words and she groaned. "Don't answer that one. Left me some coffee by any chance?"

Instead of an answer, the dirty blonde opened a cupboard, pulled out a mug and poured black liquid into it. "There you go. Bad night?"

Clarke shrugged whilst blowing over the hot beverage. "Anya? Can I ask you what happened to Lexa?"

"I think she must have been dropped on the head one too many times as a child, but other than that…" She trailed off one eyebrow raised in question. "Not what you meant?"

"Not really." Clarke rolled her eyes at the smile forming on the other woman's lips. "I mean, why was she off. Has she been to a doctor?"

"She's been seen by you."

"Anya!" Clarke wined. "A real doctor not someone who had few medical lessons off her renowned surgeon mother."

"No. She took the last couple of days to relax cos of the headaches."

Clarke nodded with a worried scowl on her face.

"Why the sudden interest? I thought you were done with her?" The stupid smile morphed into a grin.

Clarke ignored it. "Seems she's not done with me." She mumbled and showed her the text.

"You going?" Anya had to talk to Lexa about the chance of clearing up some assumptions.

"Don't know yet." She sighed. "What is she talking about anyway?" She waved the phone vaguely between them.

"Oh that? She'd been informed that the idiot who had punched her accused her of hitting him first and he acted in self-defence."

"He what now?" Clarke let her mug hover mid-air an inch from her mouth eyes wide in surprise.

"Yeah, well Lexa went and cleared it up. I haven't seen her yesterday, but maybe she's trying to get your statement in regards of the verbal harassment he had done to you?"

"Ah…" Clarke pressed her fingers to her mouth, swirling the rest of the coffee around in her cup. "Thanks for explaining." She mumbled after a while and finished her drink.

"Ok. Well whatever you decide is ok. Don't feel you have to do anything about this moron. Or the other. The female one." Anya winked and pushed off the stool she had been perched on. "See ya."

Clarke worried her bottom lip between her teeth and stared off into distance. She couldn't find a reason not to go and hear Lexa out even though the other had never given her that chance. 'Sometimes, you need to be the better person', she thought picking up her phone left on the counter.

Yeah ok. Meet me at the Once Brewed at seven tonight. C

Lexa was nervous. She had been contemplating for the last hour and a half how to approach Clarke without giving away how desperately she wanted her forgiveness and help. More condonation than anything really. If the blonde decided she didn't want to help Lexa would be ok with that. If the barkeeper however offered her help but didn't find it in her to accept Lexa's apology she wouldn't know how to cope with that.

She checked the time and a new wave of nervousness racked through her body. Clarke was late. Only by 5 minutes, but what if she had changed her mind? Maybe Lexa should have gone up the mountain to talk to her instead of having Clarke coming to her. 'Choices,' she thought the moment the door opened and a windswept, dishevelled person entered quickly. The moment their eyes met over the sea of tables, Lexa's heart sped up and her hands became clammy. She straightened her shoulders and discreetly wiped her hands along her thighs.

Clarke shook off the remainder of winter and made her way over to the table. "Hi there. Sorry took a little longer. It has been quite windy and the cable car had to stop a few times."

"Ok." Lexa nodded, but scolded herself for her lame response. "Um, what do you want to drink?" She added after Clarke had made herself comfortable at the opposite side of the table. Lexa took her in. Her face was red, her hands were shaking and had an unhealthy blue taint from the cold and the wind.

"Peppermint tea please."

"Coming up. You want something warm to eat?" She asked in the softest voice Clarke had ever heard coming from her and she had to blink twice to grasp the change in demeanour in the other woman.

"Some soup perhaps?"

Lexa stood up with a small smile. "Ok." She said with more conviction this time. Upon Clarke's responding smile, she smiled wider. "Be back soon." Clarke nodded and let her eyes follow her to the bar, where she ordered and waited for the drinks. She wore tight jeans and a flannel and she looked so utterly gay, gorgeous and enticing, Clarke had to shift her gaze to neutral territory in order to remain aloof. She wanted Lexa to properly apologise before she'd move forward to whatever the future had in store for them. Archenemies or friends, or whatever.

The brunette returned and sat down the tea. "There you go." She plopped into her chair and sipped her beer. "Stressful day," she asked nonchalantly.

Clarke furrowed her brow at that. "No offense, but why am I here? I don't think you want to hear anything about my day."

Lexa held up her hands in a 'no offense taken' manner. "Fair enough. Well first, I'd like to express my sincere apology for what I've said the other night. You were right. At the time I meant every word, but I've been able to change my opinion about you and I wish I'd never had said a word. I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm truly sorry."

"Changed your opinion? Well let's hear it then Lexa. What do you think of me now?" Clarke challenged, left over anger at the memory shining in her blue eyes.

Lexa gulped emptily. She didn't expect her to be that hostile. "Um, well I think you guys do a great job."

"That's bullshit and you know it."

"What I meant to say is that I can see you don't put yourself out there like I thought you did."

"Oh you mean I don't flaunt my tits into peoples' faces? I don't fuck around?"

Lexa winced visibly at Clarke's words. "That. Yes." She admitted quietly.

Silence took over for a moment and Clarke sipped her tea slowly letting the warmth fight the cold inside of her. "You know." She started calmly. "You really need to work on your verbal attacks. You can think of me what you want, but as long as I've not provided any proof for your assumptions, you should keep your opinions to yourself, instead of parading them around."

Any response was delayed when the waiter brought over the soup and set it in front of Clarke with a big smile. "There you go beauty."

"Thanks." She pressed through her teeth with a fake smile.

"When you're done here, why don't you come find me? My shift ends in an hour." He added with a wink. Clarke ignored him in favour of arranging her plate. "Oh hey there Lexa. Want anything?"

The addressed clenched her jaw violently and shook her head.

"Fine than. Enjoy." He smiled and walked off leaving Clarke to carefully sip her soup and Lexa stew in frustration.

"You're doing it again." The blonde sighed without looking up blowing onto her dinner.

Lexa spun her head around from where she had stared holes into the far wall. "I'm doing what again?"

"Judging." Clarke pointed out. "I don't see the point in sitting here with you if you're so clearly disgusted by me."

"I'm not." Lexa stated vehemently.

"Tell that to your face." Clarke gestured with her spoon to Lexa before starting to eat again. "It's written all over it." She added after a few gulps. The soup was good and she was starving.

"I don't dislike YOU." Lexa tried to clarify, stressing the word you more than needed. Clarke simply kept eating watching her in disbelief, which prompted Lexa to keep talking. "I can't stand the fact..." She paused and licked her chapped lips nervously. "... that there are so many people wanting to be with you."

Clarke looked up in surprise at the admission to see Lexa blushing behind her glass. She had to bite her tongue to not pressure the other further why she didn't like that and what that would mean. Instead she sighed. "You have no right to tell me with whom I can hang out. In fact, you have no say in anything related to me." She could call her out on her jealousy, but Clarke didn't want to make the same mistake and assume things.

"Are you guys dating?" Lexa whispered and gestured to the waiter from earlier.

"None of your business, but no. I don't like him that way."

The relief washing over the brunette's face was palpable and Clarke would have laughed if she wasn't so annoyed by her.

"Ok." Lexa breathed out. "That's good." She added absentmindedly, unaware she'd said it out loud.

"Yeah? Why is that?" Clarke shouldn't push her. She didn't know how Lexa felt about her. More importantly, Clarke herself wasn't sure how she felt about it all. She kept her gaze focused on her food contemplating about the possible answer.

Lexa looked like a deer caught in headlights upon the inquisitive question. When Clarke looked up after not getting a response for a moment, Lexa adverted her eyes and cleared her throat violently. She opened and instantly closed her mouth for couple of times, no words escaping. Clarke immediately felt sorry for her and started to think about a way to take her words back without making it even more awkward, when Lexa finally found her voice again.

"So, um… I was wondering if you want to fill out a report about the guy who had punched me the other day." The change of subject, although expected, surprised Clarke and she raised both her eyebrows high up her forehead.

"Well, that's the second part why I wanted to talk to you." Lexa quickly clarified.

"Right… ok." Clarke nodded and pushed the now empty bowl to the side. "Anya told me he wanted to put the blame on you?"

Lexa leaned back in her chair, visibly exhausted by the toll the past minutes of conversation have taken on her. "Yeah. Can you believe it?" She said weakly.

"Do you need me as a witness?"

"Have you seen him hitting me?"

Clarke nodded. She had followed them out to see what Lexa would do with him and to make sure Anya was coming to help. "Yeah." She breathed out. Seeing his fist connecting with Lexa face had made her instantly feel sick. "I can say that he hit you first."

"And about the harassment?"

"I can't."

"Why not?"

"There is no such thing as harassment with our management."

"Come again." Lexa furrowed her forehead; leaning forward taking in Clarke's hunched over position. The lack of response triggered another question. "Has that happened before?"

"What do you think?" Clarke huffed out angrily. "Have you not heard about the common notion, that when women wear suggestive clothing they invite men to do whatever they want?" The sarcasm was over the top, as Lexa had paraded around this exact opinion for the last few years herself. Clarke ignored her guilty expression in favour of driving her statement home. "Now Lexa, use your imagination for what Raven, Octavia and I have to endure during a season."

Knowing now that they had been verbally assaulted more than once, made her blood boil. She'd been so naïve. And stupid. And dumb. She was interrupted in her downward spiral of self-deprecation by the scratching of a chair.

"Yeah, guess you didn't realise." Clarke stood and grabbed her purse and coat. "If you need me to sign a statement in favour of your lawsuit, you know where to find me." She put her jacket on and slowly buttoned it up. "Anything else is off the table."

"Clarke. Please stay. Have another tea?" Lexa stood up as well, gesturing to the newly vacated chair opposite her.

"I'm sorry, I'm tired." Clarke smiled weakly. "And for the record, apology accepted cos I'm also fed-up fighting with you, but please stay out of my life Lexa." She added quietly in a tone that indicated she had accepted her situation. Apparently, Clarke's subconscious had made the decision without her.

"Thank you for accepting it, I'm truly very sorry." She meant it with her whole heart. She wished she had started talking to Clarke years ago. "Can I walk you home?" She asked in hopes to prolong the time spend with the blonde.

"I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself." Clarke refused her offer. "Thanks for the tea and soup. Have a nice evening, Lexa."

"My pleasure. Thank you for coming and talking."

They shared a last glance before Clarke left the pub and Lexa went over to sit at the bar. She had been feeling awful before this evening, now she felt downright disgusted by herself and the way she had treated Clarke and by extension Raven and Octavia. She was just as bad as any man thinking the three wanted the attention, asked for it because of the way they were dressed. She ordered a whiskey and emptied it as soon as it was put in front of her.

"Woah, bad date?"

"Fuck off!" She snarled at the waiter. "Don't you have dishes to clean?"

"Hey not my fault she's not into pussy." He shrugged, happy to make her feel as bad being rejected by Clarke as he had felt when she left without acknowledging him. He turned to walk back to the kitchen, when Lexa charged at him and pushed him into the corner.

"Listen up creep. That woman you're referring to is a human being who deserves respect and not an asshole like you trying to get into her pants whenever they see her."

"What? As opposed to an asshole like you?" He pushed her back.

"I'm saying this once so listen up muppet. Keep your dirty fingers and filthy eyes off her. She doesn't want this kind of attention from you or anyone else."

"Get off me dyke and mind your own frigging business!"

"What did you just call me?" Lexa slammed him once more into the corner, pushing down her arms against his windpipe.

"Let me go." He gasped and whimpered.

"If you ever even get close to her or me, I'll beat you up so badly even your own mother would think you're crap and trash you." She spit furiously. "Get it, mouth breather?"

Lexa didn't let go waiting for him to acknowledge her words when strong arms wrap around her body and pull her off him. As soon as the weight was gone, he scrambled to his feet and took off to the kitchen, slamming the door loudly behind him.

"Fuck Lexa. What the hell?"

"Piss off Anya."

"Why are you so fucking mad?" She pushed her towards the exit. The shorter woman stumbled to remain standing, but managed to balance out and turned around. "What the fuck do you think you're doing? I didn't ask for you."

"Well neither did I, but somehow you're like the nasty pimples on my ass. Unwanted, but still there."

"If you hate me that much, why don't you fuck off to your squeeze and leave me be. I had every right to kick the shit out of this asshole."

"I was joking. I love you Lex. You know that. I didn't want you to do something you'll regret."

"Whatever." Lexa brushed off and started walking towards their home. "You've been kicked out of your love nest or how were you able to be here that quick? Didn't see you in the bar before."

Anya ignored her and asked instead. "What happened? I thought you had planned to talk to Clarke tonight and not bash someone up. Least of all this weird-ass toady."

"He 'trash talked' Clarke." Lexa provided reluctantly.

"He does that with every woman who doesn't want him." Anya huffed out, having been on the receiving end of the trash talk one too many times.

"I know. It just rubbed me the wrong way tonight."

"Clarke?"

Lexa just looked up for a moment, before starring off into the distance without saying another word.

"What happened?"

"I don't even know where to begin."

"At the start is usually a great point." Anya shrugged with a careless expression and waited for her friend to open the door to the flat. Lexa sighed and after taking off boots and jackets and made her way over to their tiny kitchen and switched on the kettle. "Want tea?"

"What I want is to know what Blondie has said."

Lexa recalled the events whilst brewing her tea, sitting down at the little bar table and munching on an apple.

"Yeah, Raven told me they had a major incident last year and instead of reporting it to the police they were told to shut up and stop complaining by their own management."

"This isn't right An. We need to change the policy up there. I mean, I get it now, that they probably don't do it -"

"Congrats on that." Anya interrupted her rant.

Lexa grimaced, but went on talking, accepting the verbal kick in the teeth. "I just don't understand why neither decide to do something else. I don't want them to be a target for sexual harassment."

"It's easy and quick cash and they need the money, Lex. The tighter the clothes the more they make."

"But it's not safe for them. If this can't be changed then they need protection."

"You're offering to bodyguard the three?" Anya asked amused.

"If there is no other way to keep them safe, I will have to do it myself."

"God, you really do love this woman, don't you?"

An impressive blush coloured Lexa's cheeks, neck and ears, but instead of denying it right out like she had done with Gustus, she simply lowered her head. "Doesn't matter really, cos she asked me to stay out of her life."

"Pardon?" Anya stared at her in surprise. That would have been the last thing she had imagined the blonde saying.

"Her exact words not my assumed interpretation." Lexa confirmed mocking herself to cover the hurt.

Anya stopped her from putting her mug into the sink and turned her around to look at her closely. "Clarke told you she doesn't want you in her life?" She asked for clarification.

Lexa nodded with a sad pout.

"I'm confused. This is very, very baffling." Anya shook her head to emphasize her state of bewilderment.

"Why?"

"I just…" Anya started, but pressed her lips tightly together before finishing her thought.

"Just what?" Lexa studied her intently. It was obvious her friend had caught herself almost spilling something she shouldn't have.

"It's not my place to say anything." Anya promptly evaded the question, an apologetic expression was plastered all over her face.

"Of course. It's always like that with Clarke." Lexa blurted and finally finished her task to clean her crockery. "I'm going to bed."

"Lex please."

"Nah, we're good. I get it. She shares things with you I'm not privy to." And Lexa really got it. She couldn't even find an ounce of anger in her; she would be exactly the same were the roles reversed.

"Are you going to change that?" Anya called out to the retreating form.

"I won't." Lexa turned back to her friend. "She's done with me and I won't impose on her. I'm going to respect her wishes. It's the least I can do now."

"Lex, don't give up before you have talked to her. Honestly. Openly. You haven't really put that heart of yours on the line."

"And I won't."

Anya levelled her with an angry glare, but Lexa simply turned around and walked through the door of her bedroom. She stopped closing the door when Anya spoke once more.

"You know what? You really are an idiot. Not because you've fallen in love with Clarke and treated her like the shit under your shoe, but because you don't fight for what's worth fighting for. She might have said to stay out of her life, but hurt can turn into a lot of words which aren't true." Without waiting for a reply the older woman walked back to the door, picking up her coat on her way and slammed it close behind her, leaving Lexa gawking after her.

"What the actual…?"

Anya knew where she was headed to, but she had no clue how to formulate what was on her mind. The whole situation with her best friend and her girlfriend's best friend drove her crazy. She just wanted them to stop hurting each other. Maybe that was what Clarke indented to do, to stop the hurt, but Anya couldn't wrap her head around the stubbornness of the other blonde. She knew her best friend, and she knew how wholeheartedly Lexa could love someone if given the chance. Why Clarke denied herself to be at the receiving end, now that they had a few misunderstanding cleared away, was beyond her grasp.

The ski instructor arrived at her destination a few minutes later and knocked impatiently seeing there was still a light on.

Octavia opened the door with a surprised look. "Anya?"

"Is Clarke still awake?" The taller woman asked in lieu of the explanation the other was waiting for.

Octavia scratched her head and stepped back from the door. "Um, I don't know. Just came home myself." She gestured for her to come in.

"Raven?" Anya asked whilst knocking her boots against the doorframe to shake off the snow stuck to it.

"Don't know."

She sighed exhaustedly and walked in.

"Can I offer you anything or do you want to be alone with your foul mood?" Octavia joked waiting for the taller woman to explain her late night visit.

"Did you talk to Clarke?"

Octavia rolled her eyes at Anya's ignorance of her question. "Not after we left work today. She went to meet up with Lexa." She replied, eyes widening at her own words. "Oh God. What happened this time?" She added, before Anya could say anything, anticipating drama.

The dirty-blonde bit her lip shortly thinking whether she wanted to involve someone else or keep it between the three. "Right, well." She started and stopped, overthinking her next step once more. "She should make up her mind." She finally breathed out with irritation.

"What-" Before Octavia had a chance to ask for additional information they were interrupted by a throat clearing. She turned to the sound and looked at Raven and Clarke in the doorway to their quarters, both dressed in sleeping attire clearly gotten out of bed due to the late night disturbance.

"What exactly are you complaining about?" Clarke asked with a sliver of annoyance.

Anya turned to her, looked her straight in the eye and asked with a low voice. "Is this your way of punishment? Make her realise she was wrong and then kick her to the curb?"

"I hate to break it to you and your childish view of the world, but not everyone gets to make up and kiss. She treated me like shit the last four fucking years, and now that she grew some manners and regret for her behaviour, she's not entitled to anything more than my acceptance of her apology."

"Clarke." Raven turned towards her friend. "What exactly happened earlier? And try it with the whole story this time."

"Nothing happened, good God. She apologised, I accepted."

They waited for more, but Clarke remained tight-lipped about her encounter with the brunette.

"Which is really kind of you, but why did you tell her to stay out of your life?" Anya asked, wanting to understand the reasoning further.

"Look, I'm glad she's sorry. She was so out of line it wasn't easily forgivable." Clarke's voice dropped in volume until it was merely a whisper. "However, that doesn't mean I can forget her words. I..."

Everyone was silent for a moment, waiting for Clarke to finish her sentence. When she didn't, Anya nodded. "Yeah, ok I get that." She agreed, anger leaving her body. "Never mind. It sounded so weird coming from her that I wanted to hear it from you. Especially knowing that you like her a lot. Thanks for explaining it to me." Anya smiled ruefully. "Sorry for coming here all bulldog-style in the middle of the night. Lexa's just so out of it, I was being protective."

Clarke smiled a small smile, biting her lip in contemplation before finishing her earlier statement. "I can't be anything with her." She said and sighed. "Not yet." She added after a moment, sharing a look with all three before turning in for the night without looking for comfort from either of her friends.

When Anya woke up the next morning she excused herself quickly and made her way back to her own home wanting to talk to Lexa, but the other wasn't there anymore. Another wave of snow had come in and everyone was needed to secure the slopes. She found her hours later in their mountain top office hunched over her desk eyes flitting between the computer screen and a piece of paper.

"Where the hell have you been Lex?"

Instead of an answer, she held up one hand indicating she's currently unable to reply. Anya flopped down in another chair and huffed in annoyance. A few minutes later Lexa stopped and finally looked up.

"Anya." She stated simply prompting for her friend to talk, but the taller woman remained silent waiting for an answer from her instead. Lexa sighed. "I was up early and went for a walk before getting the call to come in as they needed me." She finally answered the question.

"I was worried."

Lexa had the decency to look guilty. "I'm sorry." She mumbled playing with her pen.

"I get it." Anya stood up and walked over to her. "You think you're invincible, because you know the area like the back of your hand." She put her own on Lexa's shoulder and squeezed it lightly. "You're not though, and the seasons change the landscape. I want you to leave me a hint where to send the rescue team to." She finished with a punishing slap on her friend's back.

Lexa ignored her twisting the cap of her pen around between her fingers, so Anya shrugged it off and walked to the back to fix herself a coffee, watching her silent companion sulking at her desk. "Anyway." The older woman sauntered back over a couple of minutes later and pointed to the piece of paper on her desk, blowing onto the steaming mug in her hands. "What are you working on?"

"None of your business." Lexa mumbled with left over annoyance at being reprimanded.

Anya laughed shortly and pulled a chair closer to the desk. "God woman. Why is everything so complicated with you. You and I both know, you will talk to me sooner than later. Why not now when I ask you?"

She finally looked up and replied with a playful serious expression. "Cos it's fun to annoy you?"

"You need to work on your definition of fun." She carefully sipped her coffee and eyed her expectantly.

"Don't judge." Lexa started and waited for Anya's nod of agreement. "I was checking whether I can afford reducing my hours to take a couple off in the afternoons to be at the igloo."

Anya was looking at her with wide eyes. "You... come again?"

The younger woman shrugged the astonishment in her friend's voice off. "It's no big deal. I've worked in a club before and I'm keeping myself fit."

"Yes big deal. The 'Roadhouse' hardly counts as a club." She sighed. "Lex this is… Wow." Anya put the mug down and studied the calculations on the notepad before looking up at her partner.

"What? I don't see the issue with it. They need someone present to avoid a scenario like last week. I told you I won't sit around and do nothing."

"That's not what I'm so stunned about." Anya shook her head. "She told you not to bother her anymore Lexa. This is bothering."

"I can't. I need to make up for my wrong doing. Anya, I was an utter idiot. I just want to protect her."

"I understand." Anya really did. She'd heard her fair share of ugly stories from Raven. "I'm just concerned you'll do it because of other reasons." She let her words sink in for a moment, before putting her hand on top of her friends to give it a soft squeeze. "If so, please don't."

"I'm not." Lexa answered quietly shaking off the comforting warmth. "I don't expect anything from her if that's what you're worried about."

"Is she for real?" Octavia exclaimed with abandon.

"This is the fourth day in a row she's here." Raven piped up from her kneeling position to fix the tap. "Maybe you should finally talk to her, Clarke. Ask what this is about?" She slapped the blonde on her ass who'd turned to her two friends. "No." She exhaled slowly. She'd told Lexa to stay out of her life and the other won't respect her wishes. The pride in the blonde fought to keep the anger alive over the clear display of caring. Showing Lexa she was more worried about her wellbeing than angry for her disregard, would only open up Pandora's Box.

"Sir, they asked you to leave. I suggest you do just that." Lexa said in a low, demanding tone. This was the second time she had to step in this afternoon. She was busier by being here than all day on the slopes. She had hoped her attendance had sent out the signal that there were rules to be followed, and any harassment of the bar staff would automatically result in a removal from the igloo and the mountain top vicinity, but nothing had changed so far.

"And you are?" He slurred squinting at her.

Lexa smirked before answering. "Someone who can make your life very painful."

He turned back to the bar staff and grinned into his drink. "Since when do you guys have a guard dog? She's adorable." He clearly didn't get the memo to shut up and just leave.

"Last warning." Lexa ignored the name calling, preparing herself for the action to come in mere seconds.

To her surprise the drunk lifted his hands and staggered off, throwing a "Fine. Spoilsport." over his shoulder. She stood rooted to the spot in surprise and a very, very small part of her was disappointed he did what she had asked him to do. She was annoyed by all the entitled prigs. She was also annoyed by the cold shoulder she had received since she started being here regularly. Did she expect a thank you? Did she expect some form of acknowledgment? Yeah, she had, but she knew she shouldn't have. Clarke had asked her to not be in her life, but she had just done what she thought would be helpful. Lexa shrugged the disappointment off and with a short glance to the bar, watching Clarke, glaring at her with a scowl on her face, she nodded and walked back to the entrance of the igloo. She felt unwanted, but at the same time very needed, and nothing in Lexa could bring her to vacate her position and leave Clarke be.

"Hi." Anya walked slowly from the bar back to Lexa. "How's it going today?"

"Same, same." She replied and took the glass of water offered to her eagerly. "Small issues, but who knows what the rest of the afternoon brings." She shrugged.

"Calm is good."

"Yaaaaaaah…" Lexa yawned and blushed slightly. "Sorry, meant to say yeah."

"It's been a long day, Lexa."

With all the new snow the risk of avalanches doubled over night. They'd been watching the snow packs every day, but this dawn they had needed to get on top of the mountain to blow up a few snow slabs. Lexa yawned once more and Anya took the glass back out of her hands.

"You look exhausted. Go home Lex."

"And -"

"I'll stay and help out if need be." Anya studied her friend and could see the resolve breaking. "Please." She added. "Sleep a few hours and if you feel up for it come back later?"

Lexa turned to face the igloo, it was half empty and the atmosphere was relaxed. She studied the scene for a moment before turning back cocking her head to the side. "Tell you what. I'll be over in the office and lay down on the stretcher. Get me if you need me?"

"We won't, but yeah promised." The instructor smiled at the fact that Lexa had taken her advice seriously and nodded in affirmation. With a hardly disguised yawn Lexa finally pushed herself into motion and left the bar.

If she had known what would happen only an hour later, she wouldn't have left. Alas, she hadn't known and now was not the time to contemplate the past. It was never the time to get lost in decisions she cannot change.

Lexa woke with a jump to the avalanche siren, blaring loudly over her head. She got back into her coat and shoes and left her office as quickly as possible. People were running to get to the cable car station, shepherded by Lexa's colleagues. Her experiences with the alarm wasn't great. By the time they sounded it, it was usually too late. She was thankful it was later afternoon mid-week, which usually meant significantly less people. Although her gratefulness morphed into anger when she realised those left will most likely be inebriated.

She grabbed the field glasses she had snatched on her way out and started watching the cliffs around her. She spotted the reason for the alarm. A big slap about 600 feet above their location looked ready to tumble to town. She cursed all dainties she could think of for its existence, but time was of the essence and she started running towards the igloo, guiding patrons into the waiting arms of her team members.

"Lexa!" She turned and spotted Anya a few feet away helping Raven and Octavia onto the snowmobile.

"Anya!" She called back and jogged over. "Where is Clarke?"

"I'm taken the two out of the danger zone now." She looked over her shoulder for a quick glance at the mountain. "I don't know where Clarke is." She turned back to face her friend. "I've lost her, Lex. I'm so sorry."

"Lexa, she was right behind us when we left, but now she's gone." Raven yelled at her panicky.

"What?" The brunette screamed the blonde's name as loudly as she could, but didn't receive an answer.

"We tried that already. Please, Lexa find her." Octavia yelled at the other brunette.

"Fuck." She exclaimed loudly and turned to run back to the igloo, when she was stopped in her tracks.

"Lexa, take the other mobile and follow me. We don't have any time left. This thing will come down any second. Don't be stupid now." Anya begged her friend.

"If Clarke is still here, I'll find her. I'm not leaving without her." She answered determined and shook off the grip holding her back. "Go! Now!" She yelled already running towards the ice dome. "I'll see you later."

"Fuck you Woods." Anya growled loudly in frustration. "Stay safe." She screamed against the sirens and tumult.

"You too." Lexa hollered back without slowing down or turning back. She only had one thought on her mind, 'Clarke'.

When she entered the bar it was eerily calm. The thick ice blocks of its construction shielded the inside from the cacophony of chaos from the outside world. She breathed heavily scanning the room when she spotted blonde hair at the other end of the bar and her blood turned to ice.

"Clarke?" She called out, already in motion to get to the woman. She stumbled over her feet when reality caught up with her nightmare. The blonde was indeed still in the igloo helping another woman. "What are you doing?" Lexa yelled at her when she was closer. "You need to get out of here!"

"I'm trying, but I couldn't let her die in here." She huffed aggressively, aware of the dire situation she had put herself and now Lexa in. "The fuck did you come back in here anyway?" She screamed at the brunette in fear and terror. This was the last thing Clarke had wanted to happen, when she had returned to check the place for anyone left.

They pulled the woman up who was clearly too drunk to care and maneuvered her through a sea of overturned tables and knocked over chairs. By the time they got to the cable car station a few people were left stranded. The ski lift had stopped moving.

Lexa turned around and watched in horror as the slap broke off and masses of snow moved down the steep side of the mountain. She turned to the small crowd, pushed the drunk woman into their arms and screamed, "GET IN THERE." pointing to a small room underneath the cable car turntable. It wasn't big enough for all them, and instead of wasting time she clutched Clarke's hand and yelled "Run!" pulling her towards the office building a few feet to the left. They made it just in time to jump into the room, but Lexa was unable to close the door as snow pressed through the opening into their space. Windows burst and the building's structure groaned under the force of the impact.

"Come on." Lexa dragged Clarke along into the back of the room and down a flight of stairs. "We'll be safe in here." She said after closing a heavy metal door behind them. "This is an old army bunker. We built our station on top of it." Both slit down along the cold walls and collapsed on the floor.