She woke him up with sex and needy hands. She made him groan as small hands traced the curve of his spine, feeling the licks of scars that seemed to curl around his back and nails made contact with his ass.

He was lazy, rolling over slowly so that their lips made contact, a burning sensation that triggered something he's long thought he buried.

Smoke, demons screaming.

Dean calling out his name.

Fire burning hot, fear dominating his mind.

He was trapped behind the fire.

He watched Sam die moments before, Dean collapsing and fire licking at Castiel's heels.

Holy fire was burning him alive.

Reality hit him like a steel bat and he pushed Meg away, panicking when he saw his scars from the corner of his eye. Something frightening triggered inside him and he panicked. There was another instance later on when Meg was cooking that the fire made him almost destroy the tiny apartment.

She spent the rest of the day trying to keep him calm and yelling at him for being a fucking idiot. But she understood, strangely. He'd destroyed the tiny table he had shoved behind the kitchen counter and there was other debris from his meltdown that meg was still struggling to get up.

If I'm gonna live in a shithole it's going to be a nice one.

Picking up the rest of the dish fragments she looked over and watched him rock himself against the wall, trying to calm his tormented head and she was reminded of their time in the hospital, when his hallucinations of Lucifer become too much and he shut himself down, falling into his own induced coma and closing himself away from the world.

Only that time he woke up as someone with a new outlook on life.

"I'm sorry..." he muttered when she sat beside him, watching him try and collect himself. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry Imsorryimsorry..."

"Shut up," she growled, and when she saw him shrink back she sighed and grabbed him into her, listing to him sob.

"You're a fucking mess Clarence," she muttered, stroking his hair and letting him lean into her. "What am I gonna do with you."

Fuck!" She hissed as Castiel pinned her down harder, his lips trailing her neck as he thrusted into her. His periodic thrusts were more sex driven than love; though she appreciated that Castiel changed his shtick. But when he wrapped his arms around her and the way he kissed her, it reminded her of how Cas used to be.

Of the angel he once was, the Seraph warrior created to destroy her.

Her legs wrapped around his thin hips and her nails running down his scruff, she screamed as the orgasm came, Castiel releasing his grip on her, gasping

His eyes were stone and his face showed no emotion. Which was a bit of a drag. Meg had given him what he would have wanted years ago.

"Seriously?"

"I've been at this a bit longer," he growled. "You've been dead."

"Rude."

He sighed. "Again, however…"

She cut him off with another kiss, feeling a moan rumble in his throat. When he finally calmed down he somehow managed to let her seduce him again, let him carry her while tasting the soft of her tongue and the claw of her nails in his scalp.

"I want you to say it, Clarence," she said as they broke apart, looking up at him with stern brown eyes. "Tell me you missed me."

He raised himself up, balancing on his elbows and looking down at her. "Why?"

"Say it."

"Did you?"

"What?"

"Miss me, Meg?"

She rolled on her side, wanting to ignore his question.

"Meg?"

"Yeah, I missed you. Missed the good fucks you gave. Though I more miss the wings that aren't Kotex."

He scoffed and rolled away from her, burying his face in his arm to try and show her he wasn't interested in her new topic.

He felt her nails first, scratching over his back to flattening out to finger tips running over his scars on his front. He moaned as she practically massaged over his rigid skin.

"What are you-"

"You never told me about them; how you got them, how you lost your Tampax Pearl."

"A fire. it's why the Letters and I are on bad terms."

"What, did you burn down the bunker?"

She saw him build a wall, not wanting to talk about it. "Fine. Be that way," she muttered, getting up from his floor to get in his bed.

"What are you doing?"

"Going to sleep, since I do that now."

He stood up, surprisingly not uncomfortable with his nakedness, though his arms went over his scars protectively. He walked over to the opposite side of his bed and slid in.

"You want me to hit the couch?"

She was surprised to feel warm arms slide around her body, Castiel pulling her close to his front and pressing his stubbled cheek against her neck.

"I want you to stay."