"What the hell happened to him?" Sanzo exclaimed as Hakkai came back into the room, carrying a groaning Gojyo in his arms.

"I don't know.. I found him out side…" Hakkai gasped as he laid Gojyo on the bed as Sanzo moved aside.

"Wake up you stupid monkey" Sanzo groaned as she kicked the sleeping Goku awake.

Gojyo laid there, hands still pressed to his ears, groaning and writhing as if he was in pain.

"Stop it…. make it stop… stop… stop it!" he groaned.

"What the devil is he talking about?" Sanzo asked.

Hakkai just shook his head as he held his hands out over Gojyo, that white glow forming as he channeled his Chi. A few minutes later he lowered his hands.

"What's wrong with Gojyo?" Goku asked as he was just now fully waking up.

"It seems he… he is hearing voices" Hakkai said simply as he looked up at them.

"Voices? You got to be kidding me…"

"I wish I was Sanzo… I do not know what the sources of the voices are, but obviously they are of a great pain for Gojyo."

"But Hakkai… can't you just make the voices, you know, go away?" asked Goku. "You know, use your Chi?"

"I'm afraid Chi is not enough to help him at this point."

The three friends turned and looked at Gojyo as he laid there, muttering and groaning as if fighting with some horrid nightmare he was unable to awaken from.

The next two days passed in much the same way… Gojyo's fits came and went, and with each wave of voices came a new level of madness for the kappa. The three friends took shifts watching over him as he slept the few hours that the voices let him, talked with him to try and distract him, and sat and watched helplessly as the madness took hold of him each time. On one particular night, Sanzo, who was himself deeply worried about Gojyo, sat by the bed watching as his companion slept fitfully for the first time in over a full day and night.

"You're worried about him aren't you?" Hakkai asked softly as he came in.

"Don't be ridiculous" Sanzo said as he turned away from the bed and lit a cigarette. "I'm just wanting the dumb ass to get better so we can get moving again. You know how much I hate being stuck in one place for long."

"Ah yes…" Hakkai said. He knew Sanzo was worried; he just was never very good at showing it. It was like that old saying Sanzo was so fond of "If you meet the Buddha, kill the Buddha. If you meet your father kill your father. Only live your life as it is, not bound to anything." It was his way of saying hold onto nothing so tightly that you would die to lose it- even your friends. And yet, Hakkai knew Sanzo did care deeply for them all, even Gojyo.

"I could use some sleep.. you watch Gojyo for a few hours? Wake me when you need to. Sanzo?"

"Yeah go ahead Hakkai… I'll watch him."

Hakkai left the room. The sound of Goku snoring in the next room could be heard. Sanzo stood from the chair and stood by the window, gazing out across the moonlight field. Behind him, Gojyo moaned with the nightmares of the voices then fell silent once more. Sanzo turned, walked over to the bed and sat down on the edge and looked at Gojyo.

"You can stop that moaning any time now." He said as he turned and looked back out the window.

"Go… to hell.. you damn monk…" Gojyo moaned as his eyes opened and he looked at Sanzo weakly.

"Seriously you're giving me a head ache."

"Heh, sorry to be an inconvenience…"

Sanzo turned back and look at his friend.

"You going to be alright Gojyo?"

"Yeah…' he said in a shaky voice as he grabbed Sanzo's hand weakly and pulled it out from under his robe. In his hand was the silver, five chamber pistol he always carried. He smiled a sad smile as he pulled Sanzo's hand up and placed the gun at his forehead. "I'll be just fine… as soon as I'm free of these damn voices."

Sanzo and Gojyo held each others gaze for a long while, staring at each other. Sanzo cocked the gun and Gojyo smiled slightly. Then Sanzo pulled his arm away and put the gun back inside his robes.

"I'm not in the habit of killing my companions- half demon or not."

Gojyo tried to say something but slipped back into the tortured blackness that was always waiting for him.

"Fight it Gojyo" Sanzo muttered as he sat on the edge of the bed, for the first time not trying to hide his emotions or feelings. "Do you hear me damn it? You are not giving up so easily Sha Gojyo!"

When morning finally came and Hakkai and Goku came in to check on Gojyo, they opened the door to find a surprising sight waiting for them- Gojyo lay in the bed asleep, and Sanzo was sitting in the chair by the bed asleep as he leaned over, his arms and head resting on the edge of the bed. Hakkai pulled Goku back into the hall and closed the door then knocked, giving Sanzo the chance to wake up before they went in.

Sanzo lifted his head and looked at Gojyo who was still asleep. He sat up slowly, reached into his robe and pulled out his pack of cigarettes. Slowly the door creaked open and Hakkai poked his head into the room.

"Ah Sanzo, you're awake" he said as he walked in followed by Goku.

"Yeah he's awake now but he wasn't bef…."

Hakkai put his hand over Goku's mouth and laughed slightly.

"… and how is Gojyo?" he asked trying to get Goku to be quiet.

"Asleep" Sanzo said simply as he lit the cigarette.

"I'm worried about him Sanzo… he doesn't seem to be getting any better."

"Hakkai, Gojyo isn't going to… he, he's gonna make it right?" Goku asked as he stood beside the bed and looked down at his friend.

"I don't know Goku… I honestly don't know…' Hakkai said as he put his hand on Goku's head gently.

Gojyo was someplace far away from Shangri-La. Someplace far away from his friends and for the moment, away from the voices of his past that haunted him. He knew he was still asleep, still dreaming, in a way. The place seemed vaguely familiar to him, like he had been there before or had seen the place at some point in the past. Gojyo walked through fields of wildflowers, a soft gentle breeze blowing through his hair, and the sun shone in a clear blue sky. Near by stood dozens of beautiful cherry trees in full bloom, their tiny pink petals falling like snow in the wind. Japanese gardens, beautiful buildings of stone and precious stone, and water fountains stretched before him. What was this place, and why was he here?

"Beautiful isn't it Kenren Taisho? It is still as beautiful now as when you left, over 500 years ago is it not?"

Gojyo turned to see who was talking and took a step back as he gasped in surprise. The man standing before him had silvery hair that shone in the sun and his eyes… one was green the other was gold,"

"You…" he whispered. "Who… who are you?"

"Now, now Kenren… it is not polite to stare at people. My name is Yuuru, I serve the gods in the heavenly palace. You seem surprised to see me."

"You could say that…and who the hell is Kenren. I don't know anyone by that name."

"Oh but of course you do… YOU are Kenren."

Gojyo stared at the man then laughed.

"I get it. This is a dream, I'm going crazy because of the voices and now I'm really starting to lose it." Gojyo turned as if to walk away then stopped.

"They are gone aren't they? The voices are gone" the stranger said in a soothing voice that forced Gojyo to turn around.

"They… they are gone. They are really gone!"

"Yes Kenren Taisho. The tortured past is no more. This is what I have to offer you, this new life… here."

"And where exactly is here?"

"Tenkai" the stranger said with a grin.

"Tenkai? You… you mean this… is heaven?"

"That is it my friend. Do you really not remember any of your past life? You were not always Sha Gojyo, the half breed demon child. Your life was not always one of pain and suffering and loss. You were once Kenren Taisho, a god here in heaven, a general in the heavenly army, honored and revered by many and respected. You had authority, people listened to you, and you had power to change things that you did not like. This was your home, these were your friends and family, this was your life. Do you not remember, Kenren Taisho?"

Gojyo stood there staring around him, as slowly his eyes widened. It was like a cover had been peeled away from his memories. Things from the past, memories he had forgotten, and ones he thought he never knew, were now as strong and real as any other. He remembered being Kenren Taisho, his life in Tenkai, and the life he use to have. His mind swam with all those forgotten memories and for a moment felt like he was suffocating under them. Dropping to he knees he gasped slightly. Then he started to laugh and looked up at the stranger.

"I… I remember now" he said with a laugh as he ran his hands through his hair, still trying to come to grips with what it really meant. "I remember… I remember it all. Yet, there is something missing. There are these faces, these faces that I remember but I do not see here. Tenpo… Konzen… Goku…"

"Ah yes… your friends. It is true your old companions here in the heavens are no longer with us. However, I do have good news. They will be arriving in time and will join you here Kenren. That is, if you will stay."

Gojyo looked at Yurru questioningly.

"I told you when I met you that you would find my offer acceptable. Here it is: I offer you your old life back. A chance to live again here in the wonders of Tenkai, where you are loved, appreciated, and respected. Here there are no worries about half blood and demons. Here there is no Sanzo to order you around, no annoying monkey to get on your nerves, and no Hakkai to lecture you about your temper. "

Yurru walked over and put his arm around Gojyo's shoulder and turned him around to face the vast field of wildflowers. Every color and shade was there, except for one. Not a single red flower could be see, far as his eyes looks, there was not one red flower, and Gojyo smiled slightly.

"Here there is no memory of the past- the voices will be forever gone, your step mother who tried to kill you will no longer be that haunting memory. You yourself will change, and for the better Kenren. No longer will your hair be the sign of a forbidden child, your eyes will no longer strike fear into the hearts of those who look upon you- rather, they will inspire admiration and respect from even the highest ranks of heaven. I offer you the chance to leave that life on earth and reclaim the life you once had. Wipe the blood from your hands, erase the memories from your mind, and remove the pain from her heart- embrace this new life, and find the peace you have search so hard and long to find. "

Gojyo stood there staring, dumbstruck, trying to fully grasp the words he was hearing. Meanwhile, things were not going very well back on earth, back in the land of reality.

"Gojyo! Gojyo don't you dare give up on us like that!" Goku shouted at the still form laying on the bed. "Do you hear me you crazy kappa? Wake up!"

"Goku, cut it out" Sanzo said as he put his arm around the boy's quivering form and pulled him back away from the bed. "Hakkai will take care of him…" his eyes drifted from the closed eyes of Gojyo to Hakkai's as he held his hands over Gojyo's chest, the white glow of his Chi growing brighter.

"Hakkai...' Sanzo whispered breaking the silence.

Slowly Hakkai lowered his hands, sweat forming on his forehead. Slowly he looked up at the concerned faces of his friends as the waited for him to say something… anything.