A/N: As always thanks to Dahlia Black for her mad beta skillz. And thanks to everyone who voted for "While She Was Away" in the Back2Skool UNFmett contest, it won judges pick for best new author, I'm still not sure it's real ;-)

Welcome to chapter 3, where Emmett gets the shock of his life.


The day after the very exhausting shopping trip with Alice and Rosalie, I managed to beat Jasper to the kitchen in the morning. It was a nice change having the kitchen all to myself. I liked Jasper's company and he made great coffee, but I really didn't need to see so much of him every morning. If only he would put clothes on before he left Alice's bedroom.

I enjoyed the quiet morning. It was Sunday so I didn't have to do anything all day something I was really looking forward to that. And after spending several hours at the mall yesterday, trying on numerous black dresses, even Alice had given up. She had decided there was no dress good enough available and that she had to make on herself instead. That would require her doing a few measurements, but I had a feeling it would be less exhausting than being dragged to the mall again. At least I hoped it would.

I had almost a full hour of alone time before Jasper entered the kitchen. To no ones surprise he was naked.

"You made coffee?" he yawned, stretching his body.

"I sure did, I got up before you for once, figured it was my turn to make it then," I replied. We had been small talking for a few minutes when there suddenly was a knocking at the door.

"Are you expecting anybody?" Jasper asked.

"No, but I'll go look. It's probably better I do it than you," I said, pointing at his naked body. He laughed and I opened the door, finding Emmett standing on the other side holding a shopping bag in his hand.

"Hi Bella. Rose asked me to drop this off, Alice left it yest... Dude! Seriously put some fucking clothes on! It hurts my eyes to watch your battle sword!" Emmett yelled as he noticed Jasper. He gestured towards Jasper's private parts while he was covering his eyes with the shopping bag. In a perfect world Emmett would just have handed me the shopping bag and then left, clearly not wanting to hang around as long as Jasper was walking around naked. This was not a perfect world. This was a world where Alice chose that exact moment to enter the kitchen, her cellphone in her hand and with panic in her voice:

"Honey, hurry up and get dressed! Rose just texted me that Emmett is on his way over, so unless you want him to find out about...." She trailed off, discovering that Emmett was already in the apartment, looking slightly confused.

"What are you talking about? Find out what? That Jasper walks around naked? I've known him for years, you know that. So what can't I find out? And why did you just call him 'honey'?"

I prayed silently that we could come up with some reasonable explanation fast so that Emmett wouldn't find out about Alice and Jasper. It was too early for drama, and I knew that this wasn't the way for Emmett to find out about his little sister and his best friend. But before any of us could find a way of explaining the situation, you could literally see how it all fell in to place in Emmett's head. It was clear that it all just clicked for him right there.

"Oh hell no!" he boomed, leaning against the counter for support.

"Jasper, get dressed," I whispered. "You do not want to have this conversation naked." Jasper hurried out and I handed Emmett a glass of water. He could probably have used something stronger, but that we didn't have anything. Alice just stood in the middle of the room, completely frozen. This was bad, this was really bad. I really wished that Rosalie had been there too, she always knew how to calm him down and control his temper.

"Come on man, it's not like this..." Jasper tried, but before he could finish the sentence, Emmett had punched him right in the face. I just stood there shocked, not knowing what to do when Alice finally pulled herself together:

"YOU IDIOT!" she screamed, "what the hell are you doing? What the fuck are you punching him for, you complete moron! What were you thinking? Do you think breaking his face would make it better? Gosh you're such a... dung beetle!" I could see Emmett's lips twist at the last word, but he quickly pulled his grave look together again.

"Look, man. We didn't want to tell you because we were afraid how you'd react. I'm really sorry, we were going to tell you. This wasn't how we wanted you to find out." Jasper said, trying to wipe some of the blood off of his face. I hurried to get him some ice wrapped in a towel for his face, hoping that it would stop the bleeding. Blood always made me nauseous.

"How. Long. Have. You. Two. Been....?" Emmett asked slowly with a dark voice, looking at Alice and Jasper who took a few steps back before he answered.

"A couple of months..." Jasper never took his eyes of off Emmett's hands, not completely sure he wouldn't be punched again.

"Are you in on this too?" Emmett asked me. I wasn't really sure how to answer that, but before I could answer, Alice did:

"It's not like it was her idea. She just found out recently that you thought she was the one dating Jasper and we asked her to play along. And don't take it out on Jasper either, I was the one who didn't want to tell you."

"You were all lying to me," Emmett said with a dark voice. He clearly wasn't responding well to this. Jasper sighed, clearly out of his comfort zone for once.

He made sure he was in appropriate distance from Emmett before he spoke:

"Dude I'm sorry. I know you'll have a hard time forgiving us for this, but it's not what you think. I love her and I..." Alice gasped before he could finish his sentence.

"You what?! What did you just say?" she asked, looking completely shell shocked. Jasper looked at her perplexed. He obviously wasn't thinking about what he was saying.

"You said you love me, didn't you? You've never said that before," Alice said quietly.

"Ehm yeah..." Jasper respnded, blushing. Alice threw herself at him and it was pure luck that he caught her, otherwise they would have crashed straight in to the wall. Alice began kissing Jasper all over, clearly forgetting that both Emmett and I were still standing there.

"Eeeew gross!" Emmett complained. He tried to continue to look upset, but the fact that his little sister and his best friend were in love definitely wasn't helping. Alice laughed, releasing herself from Jasper, all the tension in the room disappearing.

"We really are sorry Emmett, but you heard what he said, we love eachother," Alice's face was one big smile. Emmett sighed. He couldn't keep up his angry face much longer, the angry grizzly was slowly disappearing to make room for the friendly teddy bear again.

"Just don't... Just don't lie to me again!" he demanded. "Sorry about your face man," he said, nodding towards Jasper. It was clear he had forgiven all of us, Emmett could never bear a grudge for long.

"No sweat, nothing is broken," Jasper said before Alice started kissing him all over again.

"And lay off all the kissing, I really don't want to spend your entire costume party throwing up because I have to look at the two of you."

"Like the rest of us don't get sick from watching you and Rosalie make out all the time," Alice laughed, barely breaking contact with Jasper.

"That's differient," Emmett said with a cool voice, "we've got style. And I really don't want to see this, so I'm off."

"Emmett," I said, "do you mind if I come along? I have a feeling those two are going to celebrate their newly declared love for eachother and I really don't feel like being home to witness it."

"Sure Bella," he laughed, "Edward is coming over too, we were just going to watch a movie. You are always welcome." Great, from one hell to another, but I still preferred being ignored by Emoward than having to tune out Alice and Jasper.


End note: Leave me some love please, reviews are like having Jasper naked in your kitchen every morning....