Disclaimer: Yeah, I own basically nothing. So…ha. Can't sue me now, buddies! Oh, and sorry this is a bit shorter than the last two.
Sirius Black: A Serious Explorer
The day dawned drearily as ominous storm clouds clung to the sky, preventing any sunlight from peeking through, almost as if the nighttime was reluctant to release its hold on the land. The nighttime, however, was not the only thing that seemed reluctant that day.
"Tell me again why I have to go along with him to find that pie?" Judy, the unicorn, groaned.
"Because you were a meanie, and so was he…So you get to go be meanies together and find that pie," Henrietta, the recently appointed unicorn judge, explained.
"I say yay!" Fred, who previously neighed excessively, declared.
"Well, yes, but if we're meanies, then why are we being sent to find something that would lead to us ruling all the unicorns?" Judy asked, scowling at Fred. The other unicorns stared blankly at her.
"Erm…because we're the only ones that can do it?" Sirius suggested hesitantly.
"Wait, I thought that old crone house-elf told him he was the only one that could do it?" a random unicorn questioned, gesturing to Sirius, who sat on a chair in the corner of the barn.
Surprisingly, Fred spoke up, "To this, I say that she might have been talking about something else. So, I suppose you don't know as much as you thought you did, eh smarty?" Taken aback at Fred's suddenly enlarged vocabulary, everyone in the vicinity gasped. The random unicorn ran off in a fit of tears, earning Fred a gently reprimanding look from Henrietta.
"That was not very nice of you, Fred. I guess I'll have to make you go with our other little buddies to go find the Almighty Almond Flavored Pecan Pie as your…punishment. After all, I am the judge," Henrietta finished in her usual shrill tone.
"Well, isn't this going to be fun?" Judy, an affirmed hater of Fred, asked in a tone replete with sarcasm.
"I say yay!" Fred declared, failing to notice the air of disdain surrounding his fellow unicorn. Indeed, Sirius began to cough violently due to the excessive amount of disdain floating about, as even he did not loathe Fred to that extent and was not accustomed to all the cynicism. Sirius then had to step outside for a moment in order to clear his head of the scathing thoughts that had previously radiated from Judy.
After several minutes, the other unicorns joined Sirius, their backs holding two saddle bags each. Adorned decoratively with rainbows and flowers, the pink saddle bags appeared far happier than the unicorn that once held the position of judge, who held an extra large bag in her mouth. She dropped it at Sirius's feet, and neighed bitterly.
"You carry this," she stated pointedly, glaring at the bag as though it was the one forcing her on this quest. Sirius unceremoniously snatched the disgustingly bright bag and slung it over his shoulder, not wanting to look at the overly cheerful designs.
Sirius glanced at his two comrades before querying, "Can we go now?" Fred stared blankly at him, while Judy stood motionless before slowly staring forward, apparently pained by each step.
"I say neigh!" Fred said stupidly. Judy turned towards him, rolling her eyes.
"And why is that?"
Fred looked confused for a moment and asked, "I say, I have no idea where we're going!"
"You've got to be kidding me," Sirius muttered to himself. He suddenly felt the urge to smash his head into the side of the barn.
"We're going to find the Almighty Almond Flavored Pecan Pie, you dolt!" she declared.
"Well, I obviously knew where our destination was, but I was inquiring as to how we were going to get there," Fred explained in a surprisingly intelligent manner.
"Firstly," Judy began, "We're going to head down Potato Path, then into Sugary Swamp, up Molehill Mountain, through Fuzzy Forest, and over Lemon Leaf Lake. On the other side of the lake should be an island, upon which the pie should sit ready for the taking," she finished, a hungry look in her eye.
"I say, all those places sound delicious, except the molehill one and the Fuzzy Forest! Let's go!" Fred declared, and galloped off down the path. Judy apparently agreed, and galloped off after him, leaving Sirius alone.
Sighing, Sirius said to himself, "This should be interesting," and started off after the unicorns to Potato Path. Little did he know how correct he was…
The three travelers plodded along down the path, occasionally looking down at the few potatoes growing on either side.
"I say, when you said this was Potato Path, I was expecting a few more potatoes than this," Fred stated, glancing cautiously at Judy and hoping not to anger her further.
"Well, I honestly had the same idea," Judy responded, her voice surprisingly sad, as all previous irritation with Fred had seemingly evaporated.
Sirius, on the other hand, was perfectly cheerful. He was going on an adventure to find something that could quite possibly lead to finding his best friends, which was quite exciting, despite the silly nature of the object itself. The pleasant fact that his to unicorn companions had remained rather reticent throughout their journey also had a cheering affect on him. Perhaps this journey would even be a somewhat enjoyable.
Suddenly, Sirius found himself staring up at a positively gigantic object in his path. Halting behind him, the unicorns neighed and grunted.
"What is that?" Judy asked. Drawing his wand from his robes, Sirius prodded the enormous object a bit, before replying:
"It's a potato…A humungous potato." Which, oddly enough, the massive object was indeed.
"I say yay! Let's eat!" Fred declared as he charged forward, proceeding to take a huge chunk out of the vegetable with his mouth. Appearing slightly reluctant, Judy joined him in eating the massive piece of food. Sirius glanced disgustedly at the creatures devouring the potato. It wasn't as though he had never eaten anything remotely disgusting; on the contrary, he once was forced to live off of rats in order to be near his godson, Harry, but that was a completely different story. After all, it had been quite necessary, where this random potato feast was not. Really, they were on a quest for Merlin's sake! An important quest at that, yet all they wanted was to scarf down a ruddy potato? Shaking his head, Sirius stepped around the vegetable to continue the exploration alone.
At first, Sirius felt rather guilty for leaving the unicorns behind, but the feeling was soon forgotten as he found himself at the edge of a swamp. Yet, it was not just any swamp; it was a swamp that appeared to be utterly abounded with brown sugar! Unable to help himself, Sirius made to stick his finger into the sugar for a taste, but was unexpectedly interrupted by a loud neigh.
"Oy, human! Sirius!" Sirius wheeled about to find himself facing Judy, whom he had thought was still munching on the bizarrely big potato. "Fred's sick! He's allergic to potatoes! You have to come help him!" she yelled before galloping back towards Fred and the potato.
Sirius deliberated with himself for a moment as to whether or not he should follow. If he didn't go back, Fred might die, which he honestly didn't think would be such a bad thing, except that Judy might be inclined murder him. If he went back, Fred might still die, but he could at least attempt to save him. However, if he kept going then he could probably get to the pie quicker. It was definitely a difficult decision, but before he knew it, Sirius found himself jogging back down the trail to Fred, Judy, and the potato.
But, could he save Fred? Would he be in time? If he didn't save Fred, would Judy be upset? Would these stupid unicorns ever let him find the pie? Sirius did not know the answers to any of these questions, but he was about to find out.
