Chapter 3: Boys Boys Boys
"One kiss breaches the distance between friendship and love"
Anonymous
Right after Leah had left me I went to bed, afraid I would call her if I stayed awake and make myself look like a big baby. I didn't sleep long though, the neighbor decided this was the perfect time to scream at his child and teach him a few swear words in the process. He'd been doing this every night since I'd moved in and I'd never actually seen the poor kid. So I figured that since I was already awake I might as well go and see if he wasn't actually insane and yelling at no one.
I walked over to the window of my bedroom and looked over at the small house. It was a cute little cottage at the edge of the forest but it looked like no one had taken care of it for years. It was surrounded by a huge garden that no one had touched since what looked like forever. You could still see parts of the stone paths that must have gone through it. The house itself was very dark but I could see two people in it, one cowering on a couch while the other stood waving his arms around holding what looked like a bottle. I couldn't see their faces because thin curtains were pulled in front of the widow like they always were every second of the day.
A few seconds after I got to my window, the shouting stopped and the front door opened. Someone walked out to sit on the front steps. I heard the father shout something I didn't understand from inside the house so I figured the person outside must be the kid. I wanted to get a better look at him so I opened my window and jumped down to the ground. Sometimes being a wolf was pretty fun. I snuck towards the little cottage to where I could see the boy's face. I was stunned to see that he didn't look Indian at all. His skin was too dark and his hair had tight curls. He looked like he was around my age and had those awkward long limbs that teenage boys get. He had his hands on his face and it sounded like he was crying.
I know the smart thing to do was turn around and leave but I wanted to do something to help him. So I stepped forward and sat on the step next to him. He didn't even seem to acknowledge I was there and continued his quiet sobbing.
"Are you alright?" I asked and immediately wanted to hit myself for being so nosy. He didn't answer for a long time. I watched him as I waited for him to answer. His hair was a mess and he was wearing a blue shirt and khaki shorts. He really needed someone to teach him how to dress and do something with his hair. With a little help, I was sure he would be pretty hot.
After a while he whipped his face around and looked at me. I tried smiling at him but when I did that he looked away.
"So you're the new neighbor?" he asked staring ahead, "Sorry if my father woke you up."
"Nah don't worry about it," I shrugged, "I couldn't sleep anyways. That house is just too big without my mom."
He finally turned to look at me and gave me a weak smile. "I know what you mean. Ever since my mom died even this small house seems huge. Is your mom…" he trailed off and I nodded. "I'm sorry…"
"At least it gives us something in common right?" I smiled weakly at him and he smiled back. "My name's Haven by the way. It's nice to meet you." I said putting my hand out for him to shake.
"Sean," he answered his smile widening, "You don't look Indian." he blurted out, putting a hand on his mouth as a horrified expression appeared on his face. I burst out laughing and he tilted his head to the side probably wondering what I thought was so funny.
"You don't look very Indian yourself!" I pointed out pulling on his messy curls. He stared at me for a second before laughing lightly and pushing my hand away.
"Yeah, well I am," he said simply. I raised a skeptic eyebrow at him and he added, "My mom was African American and my dad's Quileute."
Something broke inside the house, and his father started cursing. He looked at the house and then back at me.
"I should go put him in bed before he kills himself," he said getting up. "It was nice talking to you Haven."
"You should come over and hang out sometime. Well, if you think you can walk all the way to my house," I teased sticking my tongue out at him. He playfully pushed my shoulder before quickly putting his hands back in his pockets. "If you need anything, at anytime, my bedroom's that one," I added pointing to my window, "but you can just knock at the front door since I'm the only one living there."
There was more swearing and breaking glass inside Sean's house. "Yeah sure thing, thanks Hav," he said rushing back to the door. "Try to sleep."
"I don't sleep well alone." I said before I could stop myself. "But I'll try. Bye." I turned and walked away as fast as I could. I climbed back into my room, not bothering to go around to the front door.
I laid back in bed and stared at the ceiling. I smiled at myself thinking about my new friend. I wondered what happened to his mom. I hoped he would be going to high school on the rez. Maybe we would have classes together. It would be nice to know someone.
I had started to drift to sleep when a noise in the hallway woke me up. I sat up in bed and listened. I could hear light footsteps in the hallway, they were getting closer. Soon, the door knob turned and the door slowly began to open. I curled as far back as I could and hugged my pillow.
"Hav," the person whispered and I relaxed when I recognized Sean's voice, "Are you awake?"
"No shit Sherlock," I spat at him, "you scared the living hell out of me." I got up and yanked the door open all the way. He just stood there, scratching the back of his head.
"Yeah, sorry. I shouldn't have come." He started to turn back and I sighed.
"Well you're here now and I'm wide awake. You might as well stay now." I caught his arm and pulled him to my bed before sitting down. He looked awkwardly around and I realized he probably couldn't see much. I leaned over and switched on the lamp. "Sit down and tell me what brought you here."
He hesitated for a minute and then sat down on the hedge of the bed. He really looked like a lost puppy. "I just…well you said that… I mean I can't…" he stuttered. I chuckled and scooted closer to him.
"Just relax and tell me." I laid my head on his shoulder and yawned. Sean made me feel safe, something I hadn't felt in a very long time. It was nice. I hoped he wasn't planning on leaving soon. We sat like that for sometime, long enough that I almost fell asleep. I listened to the even sound of his breathing. It was liked a sweet lullaby.
He finally took a deep breath and I heard his heartbeat accelerate as he turned to me and said, "You said, you don't like sleeping alone. Neither do I so I figured we could sleep together." He started playing with the hem of his shirt. "I mean not together together, just like maybe I can sleep on the floor or something."
"You don't have to sleep on the floor," I said standing up and motioning for him to follow me as I walked towards the next room. "You can either sleep on that bed or bring the mattress in my room." I said, pointing toward the double size bed in the other bedroom.
He hesitated before walking over to the bed and picking up the mattress. He was pretty strong for someone so thin. I got him sheets and a pillow and we made his bed silently. It all seemed so normal even though I didn't even know him.
When we were done, I climbed back into bed and turned of the light. It wasn't long before I feel drifted off to the best sleep I'd had in months.
I was woken up the next morning by a knock on the door. I rolled over and noticed the mattress on the floor was gone. Maybe I had dreamed what had happened last night.
There was another knock and I whined as I got out of bed. I dragged myself to the front door and yanked it open.
I ran face to face, well more like face to chest, with the most beautiful male body I'd ever seen. It was perfect, muscular but not too much with a beautiful copper tone and perfectly smooth skin. And it smelled heavenly, like pine trees, wolf and something sweet that tickled my nose. I gasped and heard a chuckle coming from behind the beautiful male model standing in front of me. I backed away and looked up at the body's face. It was even more beautiful then the rest. He looked younger than I thought he would and had a magnificent warm smile. His eyes were a perfect black and I felt like I could stair into them forever. I noticed his eyes rake over me with concern and I suddenly felt self-conscious. I bit my lip and looked at my feet blushing.
"Hi," he said nervously. His voice was soft and comforting. I couldn't help but look back up at him.
"Hi," I said back in an embarrassingly high-pitched voice. I blushed again and quickly looked away. I heard the chuckle again; I was going to have to kick that person's ass when Mr. UnderwearModel was gone. I started playing with the hem of my shirt and realized that I was still in my Eeyore pajamas.
"I'm sorry, maybe we came too early. We'll come back later so you can sleep some more." He said in a worried tone.
"NO!" I answered a little too fast. I thought about what to say next. I already made a big enough fool of myself. What did it matter now? "I mean, I was already up, I just hadn't changed or anything. You can come in while I get ready. I mean if you want to of course."
"You shouldn't let people you don't know in like that you know?" he said in a firm voice, I looked up at him confused. What was it to him anyways?
"Oh shut up Seth!" I heard Leah say. She pushed the man to the side and walked right into the living room. "She's a big girl and you're going to come in anyways so just relax." She sat down on a couch and turned on the TV. I just stood there not sure of what to do.
"I'm Seth," the man whispered after a few minutes of very awkward silence.
"Yeah, I figured" I answered. "You can come in. I'm just gonna go… " I trailed off pointing upstairs. He just stared at me with the most haunted look I'd ever seen. It was like he was having an internal debate with himself. I figured this was my time to leave so I turned to go when a hand grabbed my wrist firmly. My instincts kicked in, I ripped my hand out of his and growled. I spin around to face my attacker only to find a dumbfounded Seth staring back at me.
"I-I'm sorry, did I hurt you?" he asked stepping towards me. I tried very hard not to walk away but as he got closer I couldn't help but turn around and run up the stairs. When I got to the top, I closed my door as gently as I could and tried to hear if he was gone. I could still hear the TV but that was about it. I really hope I hadn't hurt his feelings, I don't know why I reacted like that with him.
I needed to calm down before I went back downstairs. I picked up whatever clothes were on the top of the pile. When I looked at them I realized that the colors didn't match and they looked like something Sean would wear. I needed something more feminine. I dug through my closet to find a jean skirt and purple tank top.
After a very long and hot shower, I climbed out and pulled on my clothes making sure to pull the tank top down so it showed off a little cleavage, not that I had much left after six months of running and eating almost nothing. I wondered if Seth would think purple was a good color for me, but that didn't matter either since he probably thought I was insane.
I cracked the door open as silently as I could and heard him talking. My heart started beating like crazy, I was so happy he hadn't left.
"…hates me Leah," he sounded like he wanted to yell at her but was keeping his voice very low.
"She doesn't hate you, Seth. No one in a right mind could hate you. Look even I can't hate you and I hate everyone." I heard her chuckle. I guess she did that a lot.
"She's gonna hate me soon." he sighed, "I don't know what to do Leah."
"You always do what's best, just stop torturing yourself about it." I could barely hear her so I stepped out of the bathroom to get closer. "But you're gonna have to hurt one of them and you better make sure you don't hurt both."
"She's just so perfect, did you see her? Her eyes and her skin and the way she blushes all the time and those freckles…" he trailed off and I touched my cheeks. He couldn't be talking about me. But I did have freckles and seemed to blush a lot lately...
"First of all, she only blushes because of you. Second, I did notice the rest I'm not blind. And third, I noticed she was the skinniest person I know and I thought you would notice that more than the rest. You should be ashamed of yourself, you so don't deserve her," she finished in a teasing tone.
I tried moving closer but the floor cracked and I figured they wouldn't be saying much more so I walked back down stairs. I found them sitting in front of the TV like they hadn't been talking at all. Seth was staring intently in front of him and didn't acknowledge the fact that I walked in. I couldn't help but feel disappointed even though I was pretty sure he hadn't been talking about me. He was so perfect and I got my mom killed. Why would someone like him even look at someone like me?
I crawled into the sofa and wrapped my arms around my legs, trying very hard to smile at Leah when she looked over at me. This whole situation was just awkward and for the first time since I got to La Push, I just wanted to be alone.
Someone's stomach started growling loudly but I didn't pay attention. I just felt like everyone was watching me and I wanted to go hide under the rug.
"You're hungry?" Seth asked, suddenly sitting on the floor right next to me. I looked down at him confused and when my eyes met his I forgot what he asked. I felt myself leaning toward him; it was like an invisible thread drew me to him. His eyes flickered to my lips for a split second and it was enough to snap me out of it.
"I'm sorry, what?" I asked looking away and biting my lips. I felt his fingers gently tickle my stomach; normally I'm very ticklish but his hand was cold and it made me shiver.
"I-I shouldn't have done that I'm sorry." He said quickly taking his hand away, and somehow I found myself catching it.
"No, it's not that I mind… Your hand was just a little cold." I held on to his hand firmly even though my brain kept telling me I should probably let go now. He looked over at Leah, who was staring at me curiously.
"You think his hand is cold?" she asked apparently very surprised. Seth lifted his other hand up to cup my cheek with a panicked look on his face.
"Yeah, so?" I looked down at Seth; his face was now inches from mine. I could feel his warm breath on my lips; it was intoxicating, causing me to forget everything and my heart to skip a beat. The things this guy did to me were so unfair, especially since he didn't seem to notice anything. Of course he wouldn't, being at least 20 why would he give a second thought about a dumb teenage girl.
"You're hot." Seth said, placing the back of his hand on my forehead.
"Yeah, well you're not so bad yourself." I blurted out. God I was such an impulsive idiot sometimes! I felt myself blush and seriously considered digging a hole under the house where I could go hide. Before I could get away, Seth was picking me up bridal style and walking toward the door. "Hey! What are you doing?"
"I'm taking you to the doctor, you've got a really, really bad fever." Seth voice was trembling and his arms were firmly wrapped around my body.
"I'm fine, Seth. I'm always this hot, just like you." I said leaning my head against his chest.
"I'm not joking Haven!" he yelled startling me, "you seriously have the worst fever I've ever felt. I-I'm surprised you're st-still…" he let his voice trail of like he didn't want to say it afraid it might come true.
"Neither am I." I whispered. "Just listen to me. Please?" I begged not looking up at him.
"Oh Haven, I'm sorry. Don't cry." I hadn't even realized that I was. He brushed his thumb across my cheek. I closed my eyes and savored the sensation of his skin against mine.
I felt him lean down slowly but didn't dare open my eyes, afraid that if I did I would wake up. When his lips touched my temple, I was expecting something incredible to happen. You know like when you're watching a romantic movie and they finally kiss. You get butterflies in your stomach and shivers all over. But that didn't happen. It just felt right and so incredibly comforting.
He moved his lips down to my cheek and gently kissed away a tear. My stomach tightened and I let out the breath I hadn't realized I was holding. I felt the tip of his nose against mine and my heart started pounding against my chest. I took a deep breath trying to calm myself, and that sweet smell started tickling my nose again.
I waited for him to kiss me again but he didn't seem to be going to. I nervously licked my bottom lip. His arms stiffened around me and suddenly his lips were on mine. I gasped in surprise and felt him move away. My eyes flew open and I pulled his head back down to mine. His lips were so soft I felt this overwhelming urge to taste them and it took all my strength not to lick them. I heard myself moan in pleasure and frustration. It was so perfect but I wanted so much more. I couldn't even think about what I wanted, I just needed it. Seth growled against my lips before sliding his tongue between them. My body seemed to know what was going on and my mouth opened allowing his tongue to meet mine. He tasted so good that I moaned again not sure exactly what to do. Seth somehow moved me so that I was now sitting with my legs wrapped around his waist. He pushed me hard against the wall and I felt the skin of my lip break and tasted my blood in my mouth.
Right then I don't know why or how but I lost it. I growled before placing both palms on Seth's chest and let out all the energy I could to get him away from me. He flew across the room and slammed into the wall. I didn't understand why I did that, I mean I didn't fully understand why I kissed him but I certainly didn't understand why I had just tried to kill him.
He wasn't moving. Where was Leah? I couldn't go near him, what if I did it again? What was wrong with me? Why did I have to hurt everyone? I knew I should do something but I couldn't bring myself to move. That didn't surprise me, I knew now that no one could count on me for anything. All I could do was hurt people. I was such a monster.
After what felt like hours, Seth moved his hand around like he was searching for something. He looked like he wanted to open his eyes but couldn't. What had I done to him? Leah came running in and went straight over to Seth grabbing his searching hand.
"Hav…" he whispered, turning his head toward Leah, his eyes still closed. She threw me an angry look.
"What the hell happened?" she demanded getting up and flipping her phone open. She dialed a number and placed the phone against her hear while staring at me impatiently.
"I have powers." I said finally able to walk over to Seth and sitting on the floor next to his head. "I don't know what happened. I didn't mean to. I'm so sorry." Leah started to talk to whomever she was calling but I didn't pay attention. All I could concentrate on was Seth.
He opened his eyes and searched around the room before leaping up. He looked completely panicked and I didn't dare move. When his eyes met mine he relaxed and picked me up off the floor hugging me as hard as he could. He really was way too good for me. I pushed him away gently and he looked at me confused.
"Listen, I need to get Seth to the doc to make sure he's ok." Leah said calmly. "When I get back we're going grocery shopping and you're going to explain these powers to me." She started pulling Seth out the front door but he didn't take his eyes of me.
"I'm so sorry, Haven." He said before turning and following his sister out the door.
I just stood there unable to react or say anything. He was sorry? For what? I was the one who almost killed him. Was he sorry about the kiss? Of course he was sorry, he obviously didn't ever want that to happen again. Who would want to kiss someone who tries to kill you? I certainly wouldn't.
I touched my lips with my fingers and couldn't help but feel disappointed. It had started out so perfectly but that was certainly not how I had imagined my first kiss.
A/N: Sorry for taking so long to update, college work is a killer... thanks to dazz for betaing :)
