Okay, here's the final addition to my little Tony-study. Hope you like.
Spoilers for seasons 1-3.
Gibbs was really good at reading people, but DiNozzo had him puzzled for longer than he would care to admit.
The kid was way too undaunted in the field. No cop was that reckless regarding his own safety, especially if he'd been working in Baltimore. He almost didn't seem to care. Just like the fights he'd often gotten himself into; it was just too carefree, too nonchalant, too 'Icouldn'tcareless'.
It worried Gibbs and got him wondering. Not that he would ever ask.
Tony wasn't ready to share. He knew his new boss wondered about him from time to time, wondered about his history, but luckily he hadn't been pushing the issue. Not like Tony was going to tell him anything from his past EVER anyway. There were just too many things best kept hidden. He wasn't going to reveal the real Tony. The one with all the built up anger and frustration. He had a feeling he wouldn't be well liked.
His father had taught him many things. To never flinch when taking a punch and to smile when tears threatened. To hide his emotions so they wouldn't be used against him.
Tony had learnt it well.
Gibbs watched DiNozzo go through a lot of girlfriends. It didn't bother him at first; hell, he didn't even consider it noteworthy. The kid was good looking and had a lot of charm; he was young - why wouldn't he date many girls? But after a while, Gibbs noted the frenzy about it all. Tony never stayed with a girl for more than a few weeks; mostly it was a matter of days before Abby would tease him about having a new name on his speed dial. Gibbs' own track record with women was well known by all, but he had at least been married.
Tony wasn't going to turn out like his father. That was one of his biggest fears, and god knew he didn't have many. That was the reason he could never connect or commit to a girl. It wasn't that he objectified women; he was just afraid that he would eventually hurt them. The way his mother had been hurt.
Gibbs had noted that Tony's temper had stifled with the years, but it still seeped through from time to time.
He remembered the under cover mission gone wrong, leaving Tony and Ziva captors in a hotel room. Tony had convinced the assassins to go with Ziva to find the missing microchip. He had been beaten and would most likely have been killed had he not been able to surprise his captor. He had had that wild look on his face, the one Gibbs knew all too well, but it subsided once Ziva put her arm on his shoulder. He let it go.
Tony remembered the time when he and Ziva were tied up in that hotel room and he'd been beaten. He really didn't care all that much except for the little fact that he had Ziva's life in his hands as well. He was ready to give up his own. He wasn't afraid; he stopped being afraid years ago. But when he overpowered the little thug, his old temper flared and he nearly got out of hand. Nearly.
Gibbs sometimes thought about the night when Kate was killed. Tony had, due to shock and sleep deprivation, lashed out at McGee. He looked very hurt and angry but all Gibbs had to do was to tell him "Don't do that, Tony" and he'd stopped. Not a big deal.
Tony felt it flare when McGee had made that plump comment about Kate being reluctant to tell Tony important things. He couldn't contain the bad temper and just let himself go, smacking the kid really hard in the head. Luckily it stayed by that slap. In the early days, he wouldn't stop there at an insult like that. He had loved Kate and he knew she told him close to everything. Maybe she had been afraid of what Tony would do had he found out what Ari had done to her in autopsy.
Oh, yeah, he had a bad temper all right. He just chose not to show it anymore.
He could control it now.
AN: So there you have it. My explanation to some of Tony's behaviour.
