Gaby felt the slight breeze usher her out the hospital doors into the overwhelming light of the sun. Her free hand found her eyes blocking the rays from assaulting them while her other arm carried her coat and handbag.
Illya emerged seconds later finding her coat covered hand, slipping his own comfortably into hers.
Gaby's arm tensed at his large cold fingers gripped mercilessly into her small palms. She knew he was worried. She had never known Illya to show his weaknesses, the KGB had trained that out of him; weakness meant there was something exploitable about you. And he did his best not to show anyone that he had visible faults.
Instead of taking a taxi, Gaby led the way almost pulling Illya along with her like a stubborn child.
Usually he was the one waiting on her slow pace, but his legs seemed to be in a trance; incapable of moving.
Was he really that frightened?
Illya's behaviour did not put her mind at ease, and the clock was ticking before they needed to board a 12 hour flight over to Shanghai. Gaby chose to lead Illya to their local park, not ready to go back to her apartment.
She felt that if they had the discussion in either of their places, it would remain tainted for the rest of their time together. Always known as the place where things went south. She knew what she would be asked to do, whether by Illya or by Waverley. Of course Illya would never vocalize it, but she still knew thats what he wanted. He understood his handler more than she did, only having encountered the man once in passing.
He looked cold and frigid almost ghostly. His eyes were so dark it almost seemed like he had giant pupils. She knew that Illya wanted them to stay together and that if he had to choose he would rather her, than the chance at a family without him. The two sat on a park bench facing a water fountain where a group of children were running around. Gaby observed them for a moment before returning her gaze to the giant dumbfounded Russian sitting beside her.
"Illya, we have to talk about this"
She had rehearsed that sentence a few times in her head to make sure hit didn't sound too irritable. It didn't matter. When it left her lips, it rang with an overwhelming sense of urgency. Illya starred intently down at the base of the water fountain.
He stayed like that for a long moment unable to look at her. Gaby's eyes began to brim with tears. She promised herself no matter what she wouldn't cry. She looked away from him for a moment dabbing her eyes with the back of her clenched fist before returning her gaze.
"I know what you want me to do" Gaby looked away from him, unable to look him in the eyes while she uttered those words.
Each syllable stung her tongue on the way out.
"You don't need to say it" Gaby moved her hand so it rested on his knee.
The physical contact startled the giant who looked up from his place of concentration. Without warning Illya kissed her, pulling her lips up to his face and cupping her head. His eyes began to tear up rushing fast and hot down his face and cascading jointly down hers as they embraced for what seemed like an eternity.
When they finally broke away Illya's eyes had dried. Without saying anymore, they both walked across the street towards her apartment. Gaby placed the key in the lock pushing the door open and receiving a less than cordial welcome from Maximus. The cat had scratched up one of her sofa pillows evidently peeved that she wasn't giving him the undivided attention that he so required when she was in town. fluff surrounded the small flat, leaving little floor uncovered. Gaby sighed looking from the cat to the shredded up pillow.
Illya moved through the threshold scolding the devilish cat.
"I'll clean it up" Illya immediately began picking up bigger pieces of fluff and throwing them into her small bin while Gaby collected the broom from the corner of the kitchen and started to sweep.
They both felt the poorly behaved cats destructive personality was a welcome distraction from the real conversation they still needed to have. The one that they had been avoiding for the passed couple hours. The one Gaby so desperately wished that they could put off for another eternity if possible.
Once the shrapnel from the pillow had been diligently swept away, Gaby fed the stubborn cat, and sat conformably on the couch, stretching her legs over Illya's lap.
This time it wasn't her that broke the silence.
"We need to tell Waverley today" Illya's eyes were full of darkness.
'at least he was talking' what all she could be relieved about in that moment. Gaby nodded refusing to look at him. Not about this. She couldn't look him in the eyes and still love him about this.
Gaby stared out the window almost in a trance.
Now it was her turn to be in denial. Their little secret that would usually have made any other couple delighted with joy, would die in a graveyard of other such domestic dreams they both secretly shared. The dream would die in an abandoned paper mill in the outer edge of London, where UNCLE had set up shop three years ago. Their dream would be crushed by a boss that they loved, but knew would not permit such a risk to the ongoing diplomatic relations with the USSR. Their dream would be expelled by some paid off doctor in a dodgy part of town who would ensure her that 'everything would be fine' and that not everyone wanted to have a baby.
It was true, Gaby never really saw children as part of her life. She never played with dolls or smiled thoughtfully watching a child play. The maternal instincts were never part of her upbringing. But when she was told that her biological function as a female had succeeded her, it almost felt like against all odds; someone wanted Gaby Teller to be a mother.
For some reason she couldn't ignore that.
But she also knew that she couldn't tell Illya. He would be crushed by forcing her to do this. It would be better if she acted as if it was in the interest of both of them to do what needed to be done.
Without realizing, tears had travelled from Gaby's eyes; illuminated by the afternoon light which streamed through the small window. She hadn't even noticed Illya's own tears which stained his forest green turtleneck. She turned to look at him, waiting for him to turn to stone and quickly dry his eyes and return to his normal emotionless Russian state. But he didn't. After what felt like hours he finally broke the silence that Gaby prayed would remain until they met with Waverley later this evening.
"I wish we could have a family Gaby"
This thought must have been circling his mind for quite sometime. He probably debated on whether to tell her, knowing that it would sting them both. But he felt she needed to know that he wasn't the monster he needed to be.
He scooped up her body squeezing it tightly against his as to show her that he was human. He wasn't an intentional evil doer.
Gaby responded holding him tightly feeling him kiss her on the head, down to her cheek and finally to her lips. The time came where they had to face reality once again. They would head to Waverley's office early before their final meeting and confess their predicament with him. He hopefully had some kind of connection that could help them deal with the situation as quickly and effectively as possible.
The two traveled down to the tube station, Gaby feeling slightly light headed leaned against Illya as the tube took them all the way down to Hornchurch.
Illya observed Gaby's sad reflection in the tube window, as she briefly glanced down at her still flat stomach.
Perhaps it was to say a quick goodbye before the uncertainties of the meeting left her without the chance. Nothing could have possibly prepared Illya for that moment. He kissed her on the head once more, feeling her lean into him a little more.
The walk from Hornchurch was fairly short, and quiet, before they entered the building Illya stole a quick kiss, letting his hand linger on her abdomen for a brief moment.
This was his goodbye.
The two walked together, sitting down outside Waverley's office for only a few seconds before being called in by his secretary, a nice red headed woman named Judy.
Surprisingly, Gaby had never actually seen Waverley's office. Most of their meetings had been in the conference room where the projector would be set up. This felt so much more formal; like they were two school children about to be disciplined by their headmaster.
"Ah yes! Teller and Kuryakin! You two are awfully early" Waverley looked down at his wrist watch to confirm his suspicions he squinted as if not to believe that they could ever be on time.
Gaby looked to Illya who was better with words of this sort, even though English was his second or third language. She was too emotional to formulate a sentence without dissolving into a puddle of tears, a state she hated displaying in public, especially around her boss.
"We have a sensitive topic to discuss with you, and wanted to meet with you early to discuss it" Illya shifted uncomfortably in his chair.
Waverley nodded his head as if ushering Illya to proceed with the issue.
Gaby, seeing Illya choke on his next words interjected abruptly.
"I'm pregnant"
There was a silence between the three of them now. The only noise came from the cheap halogen lights that sounded the same as the ones in the hospital.
Waverley started and stopped his speech several times before finally getting out something comprehensible.
"And… and how long have you known about this?" his voice seemed an octave higher flabbergasted by the mere idea that they were dating, even though he had known for years that they were together.
"I found out yesterday, sir but we had it confirmed today. That's why we're here" Gaby spoke as formally as she could, trying to keep herself calm to prevent Waverley from having a panic attack.
He nodded several times as if processing and reprocessing the information that was just given to him.
"How far?" Waverley spoke between his clenched palms around his face.
"ten weeks" Gaby tried to look him in the face, but he had done a pretty good job of hiding his emotions behind his hands.
After a pause Waverley exhaled sharply.
"I hope you both know what has to be done" Waverley looked cautiously from Illya to Gaby.
Gaby couldn't bring words to confirm it, but nodded down at the floor. Waverley saw the heartbreak in Gaby's face. This was the part of his job he wished he never had to do.
"Most people won't want to help you because of how far along you are, most qualified physicians who do this kind of thing on the side don't like to risk complications with women passed eight weeks. So It will be hard to find someone qualified to do this" Waverley pondered.
"We will need to postpone Shanghai for at least a couple of weeks for you Gaby to see that this is taken care of, it may be a few days to find someone wiling to help us with this issue" Waverley jotted down some notes on a legal pad.
"As for you, Kuryakin; Solo and you will proceed with the arrangements that have already been made. You both leave for Shanghai tomorrow morning" Waverley didn't look up from his legal pad the entire time. His usual quirky and quick witted demeanour seemed cold and distant.
"And something like this cannot happen again. Do I make myself clear?" Waverley looked up from his notes as he posed the question.
They both nodded almost dumbfounded by his dead-pan expression.
"What are we going to tell Solo?" Illya piped in, clearing his throat.
"I will think of something" Waverley continued writing notes.
"We will be rescheduling your Nanny interview for later in the month when you've fully recovered" He continued not so much as a glance at his two agents.
Gaby avoided eye contact with Waverley for the remainder of the interview. She looked almost obsessively at the red carpet that covered his office floor. All she could do was nod shamefully; even though she knew neither of them were ashamed. They just weren't allowed to live the conventional life. The life that was so accessible to them; yet so far off from their reality. That is what troubled her the most.
The fact that she could observe other peoples lives, but could never live it like they could.
When she agreed to become an MI6 agent she knew she would be giving up a lot of her freedoms. But she was only young and naive, never expecting to have found someone like Illya; or live in a place that would allow her to think and behave as an individual.
A few minutes passed with Illya discussing the details of his cover with Waverley before Napoleon arrived. His slightly crumpled shirt was always an indicator that he had spent the night somewhere unknown, with someone unknown.
His sunglasses tipped on the bridge of his nose revealed that wherever and whomever he had been with; there was obviously alcohol involved.
"I thought we were meeting in the boardroom?" Napoleon took his shades off giving the three a suspicious glance.
"Yes, we were just finishing up here, I have had Judy set up the slides" Waverley rose from his desk, followed swiftly by Illya and Gaby.
The boardroom was dimly lit, with a large oak finished conference table and white washed walls.
The three agents sat comfortably at the end of the table watching Waverley point at intricate details that should be accounted for when Illya and Napoleon should be aware of when making contact with the target. Napoleon furrowed his brows in concentration clutching his glass of water tightly, trying not to show how truly difficult it was to be looking at such a bright projection.
"Isn't Gaby going to be making first contact? She could offer us some insider information on his weaknesses, she'll be in his home for god sakes" Napoleon's hangover mixed with his lack of sleep had resulted in a shortness of patience.
"Gaby will be joining you a little later on" Waverley didn't look away from the screen when he spoke.
"Why? She's our only eyes inside" Napoleon looked at Gaby who seems irritated by his berated lack of cordial demeanour.
Before she could clear the air Waverley interrupted them.
"I am in need of her on separate mission, but it should be a short one, which means she should be joining you by the end of the month" Waverley nodded at Gaby in silence.
Napoleon's eyebrows knitted together in concentration. "So then what are peril and I supposed to do in the meantime? Tour Shanghai?" Napoleon's poignant sarcasm was not well received.
Waverley slammed his hand on the table looking from Napoleon to Illya. "You both are to do as you were assigned. Regardless of whether agent Teller accompany's you both straightaway." Waverley took a swing from the scotch that Judy had placed on the table seconds earlier. Surprised at Waverley's blatant irritation with him, Napoleon remained quiet for the remainder of the meeting.
After his brief conclusion, the team was free to leave with boarding passes and throughly faked passports and ID's in hand. The three walked towards Napoleon's car.
"What was up his ass today?" Napoleon's sunglasses had returned to his face, clearly still feeling the hangover.
"Where is he sending you Gaby" Napoleon looked half curious, half irritated with the whole rearrangement.
Gaby wasn't expected that question right out of the gate. She wondered for a second what Waverley would want her to say.
"It's classified, I don't even know. All I know is that I'm taking a different plane somewhere and I will be briefed from there" Gaby sighed in frustration.
Napoleon started the engine of his blue Fiat, a vintage sports car Gaby had gifted him from her former garage. Illya was never really a car guy so Gaby's passion for mechanics had fallen to her other partner.
"Where am I dropping you two off?" Napoleon pulled out form around the curb.
"You can drop me at my place, I still have to pack" Illya's voice was low and huskier sounding. Napoleon nodded. Illya looked back at Gaby who had been staring out the window in the back seat.
She nodded silently. She couldn't look at him without feeling a mixture of sadness and anxiety.
"We will go to yours from mine?" Illya gave her a weak smile a gesture of his sympathy for her strength through the ordeal.
"I'll just wait out front peril, I'm heading to a girlfriend of mine's who lives near Gaby, I can drop you there after" Napoleon turned seamlessly maneuvering through back alleyways to avoid London gridlock.
"I don't wanna be waiting down here forever" Napoleon pulled up outside Illya's building.
The two hopped out. "So no funny business up there or I'll leave" He shouted after them through his own window, a cigarette between his fingers, as his arm dangled outside the car.
Illya opened the door to his flat allowing Gaby to enter before shutting the door. He didn't care for Napoleon's empty threats. He looked at Gaby who faced him. He instinctively moved towards her, crushing her in an heard her muffled cries and felt her hot tears fall fast and hard on his sweater.
He placed his chin on top of her head, letting his own emotions get the best of him as his eyes welled up. All he could do was hold her. it was the most vulnerable position he had ever been in.
And Illya Kuryakin was never vulnerable.
He wished he could help her. He wished there was some bad guy that he could beat up, or something he could protect her from. But he was the bad guy. At least he felt like he was the bad guy. He was the one who did this to Gaby. And he knew he would never forgive himself for doing that to her, knowing the consequences they would face.
They stayed like that until they heard Napoleon honking his horn. Illya kissed her on her head, moving towards his bed where an empty suitcase had been placed.
He had finished packing in under three minuted, a trait he had been trained to do.
Giving Gaby enough time to dry her eyes and look presentable so that Napoleon didn't give her the third degree.
Napoleon noticed her puffy eyes when the two slipped back in to his hatchback, but he silently concluded it was due to there impending separation. The last mission also left them separated and he assumed that the new plan would once again separate them leaving both in discontent.
Gaby dragged her heels walking up to the third floor and unlocking the door for them both.
The silence was filled with the sound of Maximus' muses for attention and food. Gaby refilled his food and water, letting Illya settle his stuff by the door for a quick escape tomorrow morning. Gaby failed to suppress a yawn.
"You must be tired" Illya let her settle on the small couch, letting her head fall onto his lap.
"Today has been long" He looked out her window at the dark sky.
The city lights danced with the cars moving around the busy square.
"I wish this could be real" she placed a hand on her abdomen.
"for us" she looked up at her big strong Russian.
Illya bit his lip to suppress a sob from escaping."Me too дорогой" he moved his arm towards Gaby's resting it on top of hers.
"If there was anyone I would want to do this with it would've been you" Ilya kissed the tears that were trailing silently down Gaby's face, illuminated by the city lights.
"We should get some sleep" Ilya picked up Gaby and placed her gently on the bed, closing the lights and tucking himself in beside her.
The next morning Gaby woke to an empty side of the bed. Ilya was on his way out when Gaby spotted him with his duffle bag in tow. "Wait!" Gaby rushed towards him hugging him and kissing him profusely.
"I will see you on mission моя любовь" Illya smiled, exiting with a bittersweet smile and shutting the door behind him.
Gaby turned half awake towards the kitchen where a pot of coffee had been left for her.
This morning she would be meeting with Waverley to discuss her options, permitted she could make it there without being sick.
After an hour of on and off sickness and one cup of coffee later, Gaby was on her way to the headquarters and greeted by the surprised faces of most of the desk jockeys who had assumed that she would have left with the team.
Clearly news didn't circulate very quickly in this office. Waverley nodded discreetly at her.
"Right, today is a beautiful day why don't we go for a walk" he linked his arm around her and ushered her out the front door and into the street.
Gaby wasn't very keen on a walk since her head was pounding and her stomach was doing summersaults.
After a few minutes of silent walking down a street they turned right down a cobble stone path. Gaby grew scared and frustrated at the lack of communication. Maybe this was all a rouse, and that Waverley had decided to eliminate the problem a different way.
"What are we doing here? Are we meeting someone? are you killing me? what?" Gaby hadn't meant for her thoughts to be so vocal.
Waverley responded in urnest. "Gaby, I hope you know that your predicament doesn't put me in an easy position" Waverley continued escorting her down the path.
"But I'm not going to kill you" Waverley shook his head snickering at her assumption. Gaby looked at him seriously.
"Then what is it we are doing in an empty path?" It seems that Illya's suspicion and sharp situational skills and rubbed off on her.
Waverley took her the rest of the way down the path into an open green park. A fountain stood at the centre, similar to the one she has found herself sitting next to when she had first heard the news. They made their way to a stone bench facing the fountain. The park was vacant except for two birds that perched on the side of the fountain.
"The Russians have bugged the office" Waverley looked her square in the face. Gaby shook her head half understanding their journey to the park. "It's been bugged for months" Waverley stared at the fountain.
"And you just found out?" Gaby wondered whether Illya would be in danger if they had found out.
"No, we've known for months as well, ever since we moved locations" Waverley signed in frustration.
Before Gaby could speak he continued. "Illya isn't in any danger. As long as he is being used and assigned missions they won't have a problem with him. But they will have a problem with you" Waverley pointed at her.
"I rectified that possible issue at the office by organizing for your predicament to handled, so the Russians wouldn't go mad and come knocking on our doors dragging one of my best agents back behind the Iron curtain" Waverley smiled content with his quick thinking.
"But you see Gaby I am also a human being. And nobody should be told what to do with their…. situations…and since the Russians assume that its been handled" Waverley nodded at her.
"I'm leaving it up to you to decide what you want to do"
