Tenchi Muyo: Ryo-ohki OVA4

Episode 23: Responsibility

By Galaxy1001D

Chapter Three: Disclaimer

Facing you is a green eyed twelve year old girl was displayed on it, her red hair displayed in a huge ponytail. Behind her is a moving geometric pattern of glowing neon lines against a black background.

"Hi there Tenchi fans," the girl says in her nasal voice. "Washu here. It has come to my attention that this particular episode of Tenchi Muyo: Ryo-ohki is a bit more risqué than the others…"

"Hold it right there!" Ayeka's voice calls.

Your view fulls back to reveal the futuristic chamber that is Washu's interdimensional laboratory. Washu's image is displayed on the huge widescreen placed over the touch sensitive control panel runnin across the silver wall like a shelf. The huge image of the head and shoulders of Washu Hakubi blinks in surprise before frowning in irritation. "What is it now?"

Ayeka and Ryoko enter from stage left. "This has gone on long enough!" Ayeka scolds. "Why are you the only one who gets to talk to the audience? Don't the rest of us get a say?"

"Yeah, you're not even in this one, Washu!" Ryoko whines. "You're just a baby!"

"Look girls, as the 'goddess disguised as a super genius,' the author thought my character would be the best voice to talk to the readers with," Washu's image argues before her voice suddenly goes silent. Washu's image sputters and tries to speak, but it is no use. She can't make a sound.

"What happened?" Ayeka asks.

"I found the 'mute' button," Ryoko smirks as she turns away from the control panel. "Now she can talk all she wants, but we don't have to listen to her."

Ayeka covers her hand with her mouth as she cackles a particularly witchy laugh. Ryoko laughs too but doesn't bother to cover her mouth.

"Oh Ryoko!" Ayeka gushes. "You're so devious! I've got to hand it to you! Well done!"

"You're welcome Princess," Ryoko smirks. "Now it's our turn to be the voice of the author. You go ahead and start. You're the most preachy one out of us anyhow."

"Oh," Ayeka blushes and steals a glance at you. "All right. Ahem," she coughs into her fist. "As those of you who post stories here know, this site has a rating system to determine the appropriate audience for the stories..."

"Let's just give 'em the short version, okay princess?" Ryoko interrupts. "Okay, first we have your 'K' rating, that's for kids Ryo-ohki's age and lower. Then you have your 'K+' rating, that's for kids who look the same age as Sasami does. Then we have the 'T' rating that's for teenagers like Ayeka."

"And then we have 'the M' rating," Ayeka smirks. "That's for adults; people that look as old as Ryoko does. Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha!"

"Watch it," Ryoko growls as the strap on the back of her kimono twitchs like a cat's tail. "There's also an 'MA' rating for graphic adult themes… and violence," she adds dangerously.

"But fortunately, MA rating isn't allowed on this site!" Ayeka says quickly. The princess covers her mouth with her fist to politely clear to throat. "Ahem. Now to business: This story is rife with 'non-explicit adult themes.' This should push this story squarely into the 'M' category, but the author has stubbornly marked it as 'rated T.'

"He's afraid that it will be missed on a standard K through T scan the little coward," Ryoko snorts disdainfully.

"Well, considering some of the rubbish that's posted in the 'M' section I can hardly blame him," Ayeka snorts. "I never read anything in the 'M' section myself."

"Wimp."

Ayeka chooses to ignore Ryoko's comment. "We'd like to take this opportunity to assure our readers that every effort has been made to clean this story up. No violence or profanity is allowed and any adult situations…"

"Sexual situations," Ryoko interrupts.

"Adult situations happen offstage or are referred to in the vaguest terms we can muster," Ayeka assures you. "As a matter of fact…"

"They're sexual situations," Ryoko insists. "Why can't you just say it? Sexual."

Ayeka takes a breath and valiantly tries to continue. "As a matter of fact, behind the scenes the adult situations aren't nearly so naughty…"

"They're sexual situations," Ryoko insists. "S. E. X. Sex. Just say it, why don't 'cha? It's not that hard."

"Will you knock it off?" Ayeka barks. "We're trying to clean up this story so we can keep our 'T' rating! Or did you forget?"

Ryoko blushes and laughs guiltily. "Oh! Yeah. I totally forgot. Sorry." She looks at you. "Okay. Let's start with chapter one with our struggle on the stairs." The sulking image of Washu vanishes to be replaced with a scene of Noike, Ayeka, and Mihoshi struggling on the stairs with Ryoko. "I'm supposed to naked in this scene, but you can't really see me with the other girls in the way. Besides you've seen me naked way back in Episode Four, the one with the hot springs, right? Let's have a picture from of me at the hot springs can we? Thanks."

The image on the screen changes to a still from episode four from OVA1. "Now you can see that although I'm naked, I seem to have a 'Barbie doll anatomy'," Ryoko explains. "That's because Hollywood created these flesh colored decals that fit over my naughty parts. I gotta warn you ladies. If you want to wear those you really gotta bikini wax."

Ayeka shudders.

"A lot of you have been commenting on my flesh colored nipples for a long time," Ryoko says as she points at the breasts of the Ryoko on the wall monitor. "Well let me tell ya: I'm wearing pasties! That's right, flesh colored pasties and makeup to hide the edges. I might be naked but I'm still covered. It's kind of like that body art where naked people paint their bodies so they look like they're wearing spandex, only mine is skin colored. That's how we get past Japan's censorship laws. True story."

"Ew, I think your detailed explanation did more harm than good," Ayeka winces. "I think we've strayed back into 'M' territory."

"Really?" Ryoko blinks. "But I just showed them that it was all Hollywood flimflam. Nothing's really going on."

Ayeka draws out a long sigh. "Well all I can say to our readers is…" Abruptly she falls to her knees and clasps her hands together. "Please don't tell anyone!"

"Yes!" Ryoko cries as she kneels and pleads too. "We'll be good! We'll cut out all the cuss words, I swear! I mean I won't swear! I mean I'll watch myself and stop swearing! Ooh…"

"We'll censor all the naughty parts as best we can!" Ayeka snivels. "Please don't report us!"

The still image from the hot springs episode vanishes from the wall monitor to be replaced by the image of Virtual Washu. "We now return you to the story in progress," the sentient program says.

"Good," Ryoko smiles. "This 'present tense' thing was driving me nuts! How do you narrate action in the present tense anyway?"


Katsuhito brought Sasami, Washu, and Ryo-ohki home and found Tenchi and Noike waiting for them. Tenchi looked so pale he was positively European. Noike put on a brave face. "Welcome home everyone," she smiled. "Did you go shopping?"

"We were going to, but in the end we went out for ice cream," Tenchi's grandfather admitted. "Here's the baby," he added as he handed baby Washu to Noike. "She's been rather quiet, for a baby I mean."

"Ryoko must be feeling introspective right now," Noike shrugged as she examined the carrot topped baby. "That reminds me, I've been meaning to improve my anti-telepathy helmet so the baby won't be exposed to Ryoko's twisted thoughts anymore."

"Any luck?" the 'old' man asked.

"I ran into a snag when it turned out that little Washu panicked when she was cut off from Ryoko," Noike said. "I think I know how to fix it though."

"Tenchi, are you okay?" Sasami asked the blushing teenager.

"Uh… yeah Sasami," Tenchi stammered. "I just need to talk to Grandpa, that's all."

"Meow?" Even Ryo-ohki could tell that something was wrong."

"How is Ryoko?" Sasami asked him.

"Uh… better," Tenchi grimaced. "The hormone treatment is wearing off. She's going back to normal but she's still really embarrassed. Just try to act like nothing happened, okay?"

"Oh," Sasami blinked in confusion. The child glanced at Ryo-ohki but the furry toddler just shrugged and shared her ignorance. Apparently this was one of those things that would be explained when they grew up. "Oh well. Come on, Ryo-ohki. We better fix them something to eat. They've had a stressful day."

"Mew," the furry toddler nodded before they followed Noike back into the house.

There was an awkward silence between Tenchi and his grandfather. Awkward for Tenchi at least. Katsuhito broke the ice. "So, Tenchi, I understand that you've had a busy day. What's up?"

Tenchi rubbed the back of his neck and giggled nervously. "Uh, yeah. That's an understatement. Let's discuss it at your place, okay?"

"Sure," the older man shrugged as they walked up the path to the red torii arch and the stone steps up the mountain that led to the shrine and Katsuhito's house. "What did you want to talk to me about?"

"You're not making this easy, are you Grandpa?" Tenchi groaned.

"Take your time Tenchi," his grandfather said in an amused tone. "Tell me when you're ready. Don't worry. I can keep a secret. Lately you've been complaining that I keep too many secrets, but hey? Why not use that little quirk for your advantage why don't you? I can keep secrets for good as well as evil you know."

"Yeah, you're right," Tenchi chuckled nervously. "Wild horses couldn't drag this out of you. Okay, erm… where do I begin?"

"I understand that Ryoko got some hormone treatments so she could breastfeed baby Washu," Katsuhito prodded, "but there were some unwanted side effects."

"Boy that's an understatement!" Tenchi grimaced. "They tell me that she let out some kind of pheromone that turned her body odor into some kind of love drug! And on top of that her sex drive went through the roof! I never had a chance!"

"You must have made quite a fool out of yourself," Katsuhito chuckled good-naturedly.

"That's one way to put it," Tenchi blushed. "More like a became a raving animal! God, how could I take advantage of Ryoko when she was so vulnerable! She told me to go away, that she didn't want me to see her like that! But I didn't listen!"

"Love makes us stupid," the older man shrugged.

"When we got together, we couldn't stop!" Tenchi shuddered as they climbed the steps to get up the mountain. "Honestly, if Ayeka, Mihoshi, and Noike hadn't pried us apart we'd still be going at it! Now I know how Seina felt…"

"The other girls were there?" Katsuhito giggled. "Dear me! You must be embarrassed!

"Believe me, I'd commit hari kari to get out of this if I could," Tenchi groaned, "but after both Kagato and Z cut me in half I don't think it could work. I'm still alive." Tenchi stopped walking to crouch and whisper. "Say, why didn't the author have me say 'seppuku' anyway? That's how we say it in Japan."

Katsuhito shrugged. "Who knows? This is the same guy who thinks that Tennyo looks like your grandmother and not your mother. But getting back to your problem with Ryoko, did she have a problem with your um… advances?"

Tenchi's face was beet red. "No, once we made contact, she wouldn't let go of me! We couldn't keep our hands off each other!"

"So the feeling was mutual," the 'old' man nodded thoughtfully. "Well no harm done then. It sounds like both of you were under the influence and took advantage of each other. Hopefully that let's things cancel each other out."

"What?" Tenchi snapped. "Is that your answer for everything? Just sweep it under the rug and pretend it didn't happen?"

"It's worked for me for the last seven hundred years," the older man shrugged as he turned to continue up the mountain. "The secret to living among Earthlings for centuries is keeping a low profile and not bringing up anything memorable. Why else do you think I live way out here in the country like this?"

"Don't change the subject," Tenchi insisted. "Come on, Ryoko and I crossed a line here. What do I do?"

"Are you willing to make an honest woman out of her?"

"Come on!" Tenchi whined. "How do I do that? If I promise myself to Ryoko it would just kill the others! How do you think Ayeka would react?"

"You can't keep stringing them along forever," the 'old' man said. "Although personally, I thought that you could maintain this balancing act for a few more years at least."

"Come on!" Tenchi repeated. "You know how fragile Ayeka and Sasami are! They think that nobody loves them! Ayeka still feels rejection because of you and she feels that even her own parents don't want her! How is she going to take it if I marry someone else?"

"Last time father was here I recall that he tried to order Ayeka and Sasami to go back with him to Jurai," Katsuhito said. "That sounds like he wants them to me."

"Ayeka still doesn't know why the royal family never contacted Ryu-oh and told them to come home," Tenchi explained. "She doesn't realize that they couldn't, that Tsunami severed contact to make sure that they'd stay in suspended animation for seven hundred years so they could meet me! For all Ayeka and Sasami know, it could just be that they didn't care enough to come look for them!"

"So why don't you explain it to Ayeka then?" the older man asked.

"How can I do that?" Tenchi gestured helplessly. "Tsunami and Sasami are assimilated! For all I know they're practically the same person? How is Ayeka going to react when she finds out that her little sister let her freeze herself for seven hundred years so she could come here and meet me? How is she going to react? And how is it going to affect Sasami when Ayeka rejects her? She still doesn't know if she's the real Sasami or Tsunami's creation! Even if Ayeka puts on a brave face and pretends it's okay Sasami will still know that something's changed! How can I drive them apart like that? They depend on each other!"

"Dear me," Katsuhito clucked. "It looks to me like someone is going to have to keep… secrets," he said slyly. "Good heavens. My own grandson keeping secrets and having to lie. That's too bad. I really looked up to you too, you know. You were my hero."

"Come on, Grandpa, quit clowning around!" Tenchi pleaded as they reached Katsuhito's house.

"Not so easy is it, living with secrets?" the 'old' man asked wryly. "Quite a responsibility you've got now. That's too bad. I wanted to wait until you were a little older before you had to assume the burden. Oh well. Welcome to my world, Tenchi. How does it feel?"

"It sucks Grandpa!" Tenchi cried. "How do you stand it?"

"I've found that it helps to develop a sense of humor," his grandfather said as he tweaked Tenchi's nose. "You'd be amazed what a good laugh can do."

"Grandpa I was hoping for something more helpful," Tenchi sighed.

"Tenchi I can't tell you want to do or make your decisions for you," Katsuhito admitted sadly. "You've got to look into your heart and try to find out what you really want for yourself and the ones you love."

"But Grandpa, what if I have to decide?" Tenchi asked timidly. "How can I make a decision on something so important so quickly. Come on. You gotta give me something here."

"Very well," Katsuhito said gravely as he took Tenchi's hand and put a small flat metal object in in it. "If you find that you're paralyzed with indecision, take this."

"What is it, Grandpa?"

"It's a coin," the old man said gruffly while trying to hide a smile. "The next time you need to make a snap decision you can flip it."

Next: So Happy