GAL PALS

THE LONG AWAITED CHAPTER 3

Holy crap I didn't know that this was getting views… I feel bad because in the description I promised to update, but I never did. Now I'm a liar, but that can be FIXED!

(Dedicated to Mr. Havik for reminding me of my promise and to those who continually come back to this.)

Forgive me if this isn't as silly as before, but I need to get back into the silly fits I had a year ago… it'll get sillier as I lose my mind.

AHEM!

Wupwupwupwupwuwpwupwuwpuwpwpuwpuwuwpwu that was the sound of the chopper as it smacked up and down onto the ceiling of the wallmart . how did they get a chopper in there? Isle 15 has the answers, so we must look depper.

A long tiam a go a stank cloud came from Uranus looking for a breeding ground. It wanted to put its sqiigly wiggly somewhere , butt it's planet was already filled up. It soon cummed to the blue planet and founded the Catholic Race. People who didn't put their squiifly wigglies with woo woos. PERFECTION.

For a long taim they ranned the vactican prests and noons with an iron butt fist. The madarn world changed that. Pepul stopped coming to the charched to smell their stank they hid in the rafters. Thus dey created Walmartions. Fat lumberin animals that lived off grease and Mcdonalds and had Death battles on the Black Friday to keep the species in check.

Dey new that one day a person would rise up agin with a key to free the lumbering Walmartions. They kept the facilties guarded heavily just in case. Isle 15 is the vegitable and fresh fruit isle. Nobody goes there so a chopper went unnoticed for 1500,000 years BC.

And-

" NARRATOR!"

Huh? What

"NARRATOR!"

WHAT?!

Time seemed to freeze, Allie and Andie frozen mid hand fondle .,the chopper blades stopped, yet the pilot did not fall. From behind the Trojan condoms shelf a young blond stepped out.

Wut yu want Seras?

"Isn't this chapter supposed to be about GAL PALS? You know… me and Integra? And Walter since you left the dick wad with us."

Oh yeah I read the Title as GAY PALS.

"… and your first thought was Master and Anderson?"

Well no shit Seras, you can't have two nearly perfect men in this world be in the same room and it not almost happen.

"Why almost?"

Fuck you that's why.

"You're not as funny as you were!"

STFU and get back with He She It.

"Fine."

I am back to the sotyr.

Seras stared integra down. It must be hard beign an it. She patted her boobs in thought.

Integra couldn't relax and take Dumps like she did. She could only be Ugly and an It.

She didn't even had bewbs to squish. She only had masters stank weenie in her shorts due to that olden ritual.

THAT'S IT!

Seras phased through the store with Integra in tow.

"Where are you floating me!?"

"GURL WE GON' CHAGNE YOU!"

"Chagne?"

Her His It's mind floated back to her child hood

dad was sitting on the couch nekkid again

boogers stuck to his face and a cloud of green came from his ass.

He was gross and ugly.

Like burnt pizza rolls. Something that deserved to be throwed into hell.

They were both watching the TV, TLC to be exactomundo.

It was their favorite show called Honey Poo Poo.

Why is this importany? Cuz the show was based on Integras mom.

"you see dat Interera"
"Yeah."
"Datshish whiya we exist, tah rid the world of demons like dat."

She shoevd a ciger in mouth hole and smoked it.

Sudly her eys flashed beforherheit/

Et incarnatus est de luna erunt, OLEFACTO tibus foramen;

The incartation floatd their her brain nugget like one of Alucards farts. She knew what ws happening to her bran.

When the flarsh stopped. She felt a large pain in her butt region. Peeking down she gasped to find Seras with her giant gaping Mawl biting upon her Virgin rear.

"S-SerAss!"

"Masuta- I knew you needed to be free form youre true from. So know yiu can be with me forever."

"FOEVA!"

" yes now stahp screeming in that accent the colonials are lookin at us!"

Seras released Intergras butt.

"That wasn't as bad I ah thoughted it would-" AND THEN HER IT HES BUTT EXPLODEDO A TORRENT OF BLUD FLOOSHED AND WENT EVERYWHERE!

"Dasjkglkasjdlhaksjdfhalksdjhalksdha!"

"Sir Integra I didn't know you spoke French!"

Pip suddenly popped out from under a cantelope, took his hat off and bowed.
"Renifler ma merde! C'est beaucoup de Dasjkglkasjdlhaksjdfhalksdjhalksdha"

He looked around for a minute, sighed. And Looked at Seras.

" Seras, my sweet, what is going on here?"

"Nothing."

"ah well, when's the next DVD coming out?"

"I don't wanna talk about it."

"Merde"

Tergard bent over and cried she had nothing now, not even her butt virginity or her paper work to cover up with.

She bagan to flaot into the Walmart skai.

It was the most shiney thing ever and took exactly like 20 seconds for the tranfomigaytion ro happened because this is anime fic afterdal.

She flatted back down to earth

It was just like Solayor Mun!

Except she it hes got stucked in the nekkid stage.

A few people threu up at the site of her Squiggly, but most walmartian with their atrractionto shiny things just sat there wiggled.

Seras ran over to it, strippeing her clothes off, (It was easy since Hellsing scrubs are mad of recycled Elephant poop)

She and Interfra held hands, and a sparkrle seem to drift around them lady/it parts, just enough to kep this rate M for Mastication.

They floated up into the air, two angles of boouty

They zoomed around the stoor, through the Heli-baldes, around the Mickey D's anf in and out of every bath room stall.

Soon as they were flying over the Apparel section Intergra felt a horrible rumbling in her stomack regons.

"Seras wut is this?"

"Oh you just have to poop."
"huh?"

"Don't you know people have a BM when they die?"

"Yeah, but I figured that vampires didn't"

"Madamister, who do you film every night?"

"you, ah well I sure I can hold it until I get to a bath-"

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFDSFGSDFDSSLURPSLERUP

Was thenoise of the fateful brown rain.

IT WENT EVER WHERE.

As sheathe flew above the peoples you could watch all pride and dignity leave her body, quite explosively.

Face pale white Integra looked back slowely to Serass

"W-hat was that?"

A tear fell down her face.

"Freedom."

Pip simply sat there next to the Cantelope.

Eye wide open, and mouth agape… He just couldn't hand;e this… at all..

Only thought came to his French mind…

"Vouz avez plein de merde"

Which is French for I find this easy to touch my squiffly to.

Suddenly a hand bashed through the ceiling! GASP!

IT WAS KOUTA HIRANO!

The Asian goddness desended down, and within his hands laid a fril old men.

He was placing Walter back in to the story!

With a booming voice and a word of Law he had onlt this to say to his beloved creations

"Unko no nioi kagu hito"

A thousand angels descend from the sky, each with a hellsing wall scroll in hand.

He raised his hands and spoke few words that wold be remembered for the rest of history and twoday!

"Hitori ecchi"

The masses around sang out in joy. The outlines of the people became a morbid white.

The prchpecy the propchecy was coming truw!

He then soon began to fade from existence…

"Hentai… Purisuto"

Suddenly Anderson looked up and his eyes wideded.

He was flashing back to his days… as a Hentai character! (true sotry)

Swift flashes of a gun fight flew into his mind, as well as the tears of the crying nun he wished to comfort…. It all swirled away leaving a momentary udder of… "Kris…"

A faded black form came from the memories of his past… Hands touched upon his face and their lips met. Shadow and man became one, but it was all gone in an instant… as if it never even happened… "Ah've never forgotten ye… my wee Lass…"

However these words were muttered much too close to a certain man… a certain butler to be exact.

Suddenly he had a flashback of his own, the Scottish accent brought memories… of the DREADED SPORT BALL MATCH!

The whole filler grabbed as many foot ball gears he oculd find. He was gon' need protection.

A jumped on to the closest ATV and began to ride faster than a black ghetto lady sayin Ain't nobody got time fo' dat.

Pip standing near bye thought it was best to go with him and sat on the ATV calmly.

Then it swpeewed flames and whent into hyperdirve and killed everything behind it.

BVFRRROROROROOMROROMDRROM was the onise it made as it screeched and halled ass into the Hallwasy where Andie and Allie were fight the Hello chopter.

(They were doing okey the entire time, becuz hey… it's Andie and Mother Cukering Allie Card.)

As they passed into this realm, Pip grabbed a tennis ball thrower machine.

"Piewp! Fill it with Golf bawls! I need to teach them thar scoots a lesson."

Walters eyes skinted through the football helmet. He was ready for this.

Machine in Hand and Pep at the wheel, they screeched into battle.

"AAAAUUUGHH!" cried Walter

" Le- AAAAUUUGHH" cried the French fry.

Walter machine gunned the Scottish priest down. But Andie was too quick for him. He used Allucards massive mass to cover himself. The golf balls refracted off the giant jelly bowl of a man. Seras and Itergard swiftly flew in and lifted the heavy tub of dead meat lard. Well… more like scooted his ass across the floor. The Helicopter man had enough of this an began shooting at Walter and pippin. They skilly fully dodged all the attacks by mixing achient French technques of running away ( in other countries the term dodging may ne used)

Suddenly they ramped up Allie's fat thigh and on to this belly, where they got stuck.

Anderson sawing his chance, jumped up and slammed into his bro's side.

Integra grabbed Walter and Serasu grabbed Pip as the ATV was rocketed by the wave of blarb into the SmHell a ciptar.

With several vibrating turns, and a fart, It circled and crashed into the floor. Quickly Andie being the highest still did an epic knee slide into the womens bra section and grabbed the only one left in the custom Anime Girl sizing section. They all grabbed on to his legs, as the resulting explosion whushed them into the air, filling the bra with floaty hot gas and they flew off into the sky towards their next generatin of adventure.

DUN DUNd dud?

I tried to make this one longer, because I hadn't updated in a while.

Thank you for the support. I hope to do my best! (by doing my worst)

I know, like I've said, that this isn't as random or witty as before, but I'm still settling back into being silly. (And I wrote this at work, imagine how my boss felt after he manged to get a glimpse of… well the everything scene.) – FatherLuna!