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Bella

I was glad, when Charlie offered to drive us to Billy's. I have so much going on in my mind and he's bound to notice if I'm spaced out while driving. The more things I can do to keep him distracted the better. He'll find out what's going on in due time, but before then I don't need to be interrogated. Our ride was quiet; it normally is with Charlie, which is nice. Charlie didn't even have the car in park, before Jake had me out of the car and into one of his signature hugs.

"Shit, Jake. I'm still breakable you know." We both laughed and Charlie let out a chuckle. If only he knew. I know he hopes I will end up with Jake. I've tried to explain to him why it's not going to happen, but I don't think he'll ever stop trying. I love Jake. I just love him like a big over protective brother. He's a great guy, I'm sure one day he'll find his imprint and he'll be great at this love shit.

"Jacob, I think I'm going to have to forbid Bella from coming around here. I assume that language she's been using has something to do with your influence." Charlie looked so serious, but I knew he was teasing. If anyone influenced my language, it was him.

"Oh. I'm sorry Charlie. I really didn't mean-" Poor Jake, he really is taking him serious. Charlie was doubled over in laughter, but puts his hand up to interrupt.

"It's...okay...kid. I was...just...joking."

"Oh. Well...that wasn't very funny Chief."

"Yes, it was. Anyway, I'm going in to see Billy. You kids have fun."

"Alright, you guys too. We're going down to the beach for a while"

Being with Jake has always been so easy. I sometimes wish that I could feel more for him, but I know that won't happen. We're just so different, and while it works great for us, it just works as far as friendship goes. A relationship between us would just be too hard. One day he will imprint and if I did reciprocate his feelings, I'd only end up hurt. After this Edward fiasco, I'm not sure that I want to find love again. Fuck, I'm not even sure I know what love is or that I even want to. I just hope I don't end up like the goddamn forty year old fucking virgin.

"Bells, you okay? You seem to be thinking pretty hard." Jake's concern seemed to be genuine, so I might as well put it all out there.

"I'm great! Edward's sleeping with Alice." I want to keep the mood light. We need to get through this, without him getting pissed off. I really don't need Jake to try and kill Eddie tonight.

"What the FUCK?!" My thought's exactly. That's the reaction I expected out of him, if I can keep things going like this, we may actually get through this.

"I don't know, Jake, I've asked myself the same thing for a month now. I don't want to believe it, but I know it's true."

"How do you know? Did they tell you?"

"No, I just know. Their constantly going on shopping trips or hunting trips, alone. He always reeks of her and I don't know... it's just the way they look at each other. Call it a feeling or whatever, but I know I'm not wrong.

"Before you ask, I'm not upset. It's actually some what of a relief. I've been doing a lot of thinking and honestly, our relationship wasn't healthy. Not for me anyway. He was very controlling and possessive, he always made me feel like I wasn't good enough, and the constant rejection has taken a toll on me. It's time I took back control of my life and figure out who the fuck I am. I'm going to need your help though." He's looking at me like I had lost my damn mind. Maybe, this wasn't such a good idea after all. I need him to understand it's not just Edward and Alice. It's all of it. I'm worn the fuck out and just need it all to end, so I can move on with my life.

"I'd do anything you asked, Bella, but what exactly is it that you need?" He seems skeptical. God, I hope he understands.

"Well, I've come up with a plan. You know I agreed to be changed when I went to Italy and really I don't see any way around that. Besides, I still want it. First thing I need to do though, is get proof of Alice and Edward's deception. Jake, you have to understand, their not the only reason I'm doing all of this. I'm doing it for my future and the future of other people that will cross paths with the Cullen's. They may not be a direct threat like most vampires, but they are just as dangerous. Do you get what I'm saying?"

"Yeah, but Bella you don't have to be turned. We can keep you safe here. Is all of this really worth your life?" Christ! Is that all he got from that?This is going to be harder than I thought.

"Listen, I know you want to protect me and I understand you want me to remain human. This is bigger than just me though, Jake. I can't stay in hiding for the rest of my life and I'm not willing to even entertain the idea. I can't let this go; if I do then it's just letting the Cullen's get away with fucking with my life, yet again. They have taken away the essence of who I am. Can't you see it? I'm not the same girl I was when I first moved to Forks, I don't even know who that girl is anymore. It already seems like a life time ago. If I let this go, I'm even weaker than I was when they left. I need you, not as a protector, not as a member of the pack, but as my best friend.

"Edward and Alice will be alone tomorrow. They said their going 'shopping', but I know they'll be at the house. You have to go with me, Jake. If you don't, she'll see me coming and I'll never be able to prove it. They've always been the good guys and if I can't prove it, it will remain that way. Graduation is next week and I promise if you do this with me, it will be worth it. You hate Edward, that it self should be reason enough for you to help me. I assure you, all the Cullen's will get what they deserve. I just need time to set things up and I need to use Edward and Alice's betrayal to set my plan into motion. Please, Jake?" I knew I was rambling on, but I had a feeling he was going to say no. This was my only chance and I would say anything to make him to see my point.

"Alright" He simply said.

"Really? That was easy. Thank you, Jake, you won't regret it!"

"I'll have to talk to Sam, though. If he says its okay, I'll do it. Make sure this is what you want to do, Bella, because once you start this, you'll have to finish it." Oh, I'm positive. So fucking positive!

"I'm sure, believe me. I've had plenty of time to think about this. Do you want me to go with you to see Sam? I know I'm not his favorite person right now, but maybe if I could get him to understand the situation in its entirety, it would help."

"That would probably be helpful. I think he's over at Emily's now. We better hurry, I'm sure the Chief's wondering where you are."

Jake was right, I knew we needed to hurry up, but I was more than a little nervous about talking with Sam. He really hasn't wanted anything to do with me since the Cullen's got back. I know he thinks I was just using Jacob, but it really wasn't like that though. I don't hang out with Jake as much, that's only because I was spending time with Edward. I think it's fair to say that boyfriend out weighs friend, especially when your boyfriend and friend are enemies. I try to be fair to both of them; it just doesn't always turn out that way. Emily seems to understand, as well as the other guys in the pack. Paul's been a little distant, but nothing compared to Sam. I often wonder if it's because I'm going to be changed. I guess I could see not wanting to get close to someone when they are going to become something you hate. I wish I could make him see that it's really not a choice anymore. Yes, I want it, but it's also part of an agreement and I'm going to stick to my end of the deal. I will, even if the Cullen's won't.I don't really have a choice, anyway. I know that no matter what I do, they will find me. It's death one way or another. Luckily, Jake was right, Sam is at Emily's.

Please, God, let this go well.

"Uh...Jake...are you going to knock?" It feels like we've been standing out here for an hour, although I'm sure it's only been a couple of minutes.

"I was just getting my thoughts together. Geez, woman, have some patience." His stern expression had me in a fit of giggles. I should probably have been appalled at his terminology, but really, it's just so Jacob.

"I love it when you talk caveman to me, Jake." Ah, my smile. My shot at humor must have worked. He finally got up to courage to knock on the door. Sam looked confused and I'm sure it was by my presence. Jake hasn't said anything and I knew if someone didn't break the silence soon, Sam would lose his patience.

"Hello, Sam. I'm sorry to bother you, but Jacob and I have something we would like to discuss."

"Well, don't just fucking stand there. Come on in." Maybe Sam isn't the only one who will lose his patience. I really just want to slap that smug off his face.

"Emily! It's nice to see you again." I ran up and gave her a hug. It's so easy to feel comfortable with her. She was like Esme in a way; motherly and loving. There is a difference though; Emily stands up for right and wrong. She would never let anyone take advantage of her or any one she truly loved.

"It's good to see you too Bella. How have you been?"

"Well, why don't you come join us? I'm sure that will answer your question and explain why I am here."

Sam sat in front of the television, looking slightly uncomfortable and uninterested. I honestly didn't know what to say, so I was relieved when Jake took matters into his own hands. It didn't take him long to get to the point. He explained my situation, better than I ever could. Sam seemed shocked, Emily seemed disgusted, and I was still extremely nervous. What ever conclusion Sam came to, I knew it would determine my future.

"I'm really not sure what to say. This is much unexpected; as I'm sure you know when vampires mate they mate for life. I can't imagine what would have caused this to happen. Don't misunderstand, it's not that I'm unhappy it has, but it doesn't make sense. Are you sure?"

"Sam, I'm positive. I'd be welling to bet anything on it. As far as mating for life, I'm not really sure that's entirely true and if it is, Edward is not my mate. I'm not sure what happened in the case of Jasper and Alice, but really that's not any of my concern. My main priority is my safety, which apparently is not the concern of the Cullen's. If I'm wrong, fine, but I'm not. I explained it to Jake, I don't know how I know; I just do." He looked at me in disbelief and I was sure what was coming.

"Why should I believe you or even care? This seems to be your problem, Bella, and I'm not sure I want the pack involved; any of them." He was starring at Jake as he spoke. I've tried to be nice, but he was fucking testing me.

"You're right it is my problem, but I know how you feel about the Cullen's. You don't trust them and neither do I. If you don't want to help me that's fine, but you also don't have to be an asshole. I came to you with respect and I think you and I both know I could have got Jake to do it without your consent. I'm not the bad guy here, but if you want to make it seem that way, fuck you." Jacob and Emily must have got a kick out of my rant. They're both in hysterics & Sam looks like I just kicked him in the fucking balls.

"What the fuck is so funny?" I didn't see anything funny about the situation and they both shut up pretty quick, however, they couldn't hide their smiles.

"Nothing Bells, we're just shocked. Who knew you had it in you? You just told the alpha of a pack of wolves to basically fuck off. You're going to be one bad ass bloodsucker, Bella."

"I was already going to be a bad ass vampire Jake, now I'm just going to be a bad ass vamp that kicks ass and takes goddamn names. Now, Sam, either you're with me or against me. I'm not going to beg. I understand you don't care much for me, but I really think if you put our differences aside, you will see just how much we have in common." He seemed to be deep in thought and I took that as a good sign. Shit, I'm surprised he didn't throw me out on my ass along with my 'fuck you'.

"Well, Miss Bella, it seems you may have just taken my rank as Alpha." He chuckled quietly and I couldn't help but smile. "I'll allow it, but I have one condition."

"Alright; that would be?" What is up with these men and there conditions? Seriously, can't they just stick with the program?

"I come along tomorrow. I can't allow Jake to go alone and you have no way to defend yourself. Besides, you really think I would want to miss out on all the fun?" Everyone laughed and I cried fucking tears of joy. Things were working out perfectly, better than expected.

"Thank you, Sam. I promise if I didn't think this would work, I wouldn't even make an attempt."

"I know that and no matter what you believe, I do trust you. I do have a few more questions, but I understand you are in a rush. Some things we can go over tomorrow. I do want to know if you are still planning on going through with the change though." Oh God!I don't know if I should answer, I want Sam on my side. I just hope this doesn't change anything.

"Yes, as you know when I went to Italy, I made a deal. The longer I wait, the more danger I am in."

"Sam, please tell her, we can keep her safe. She doesn't have to do this." Can't he keep his mouth shut? I seriously doubt Jake is helping my case.

"No, Sam, Bella is right." Thank you!"We are all aware of the danger she is in. She may not be safe, but she will be safer, as will her family. You have to look at it from all sides, not just the side you're on." I was impressed with Emily's speech. I was also thankful to have someone on my side.

"I agree." WHAT? Someone up there does love me.

"Okay, well, thank you both. Is there anything else Sam?"

"Yes, what are you're plans after tomorrow?"

I wasn't really sure that I wanted to give away that much information yet, but I figured Sam was putting his trust in me and it would probably work in my favor to be honest. I told him about my plans for the following months and to my surprise, every one thought my plan was brilliant. I knew Charlie would be looking for me, so we said our goodbyes, and planned to meet in the morning. I feel like Sam and I have finally come to some understanding and I just hope it sticks. I'm sure it's going to be tough for them to be around me after my change, I just hope they remember it's for the greater good.

"Hey, kiddo. Have a good time?"

"It was the best dad, the absolute best."


Coming up: Catching Edward. 'Boxers and Bushes'