A/N: You guys are awesome! The reviews have been amazing and they just keep coming! I am glad everyone is enjoying the story and I hope y'all stick around because I have a lot of stuff planned for this story!

A lot of readers feel Jake isn't remorseful enough over what he did to Bella. I completely agree that he isn't and I don't think I am going to change that. I told one reviewer that I couldn't be 100% positive, but I don't remember SM making Sam all that sorry over leaving Leah for Emily. The only one bitter there was Leah and Bella is definitely going to be bitter toward Jake for a while. You'll see more of that coming up in chapters 4 and 5.

You may notice I didn't use a Wonderwall definition below. I used something a little different for this chapter and I think it will make sense to you after you read the chapter.

Now to my thank yous :) JRsgirl and shelbielyncullen (have you guys checked out Re Born yet?), without your support this chapter would still be on my computer and I never would have had the courage to post it! And another big thank you to my wonderful beta qjmom!

I own nothing except WAY too many pictures of Robert Pattinson on my computer

If I should die before I wake
It's 'cause you took my breath away
Losing you is like living in a world with no air
Oh
I'm here alone, didn't wanna leave
My heart won't move, it's incomplete
Wish there was a way that I can make you understand

But how do you expect me
To live alone with just me
'Cause my world revolves around you
It's so hard for me to breathe

No Air – Jordin Sparks ft. Chris Brown

CHAPTER 3: HE LOVES ME, HE LOVES ME NOT

BPOV

I stood in the bathroom trembling and telling myself that I should not be nervous. It wasn't like I was a virgin or anything. Obviously, in the time I was with Jacob we had been intimate. But it is hard to make love to someone when you are not completely in love with them….even if that person is your husband. However, the guy on the other side of this door was by far the most amazing guy in existence and I was terrified I would disappoint him. I had never felt very sensual or sexy in my relationship with Jacob.

Adding to my nervousness, my head was reeling as I attempted to sort through all the advice my girlfriends had offered over lunch yesterday and I was starting to feel dizzy to the point of passing out. But that would definitely disappoint Edward if I passed out in the bathroom and didn't come out, so I closed my eyes and took deep breaths. After a minute I felt better and started focusing on the advice that was supposed to help me make this the night everything I wanted it to be for me and Edward. I removed my robe and admired my black teddy in the mirror. I took a brush and teased my hair and added some hairspray so the wild tousled look would stay in place, at least for now. Not for long if things went according to plan…..

I exited the bathroom and sauntered across the hall to his bedroom where Edward was sitting on his bed waiting for me. "Wow," he breathed, almost inaudibly. I walked closer and reached out to take his face in my hands and kiss him. For a minute it was just like the other kisses we had shared all those years ago, chaste and guarded, but then in the blink of an eye it changed. He stood up and brushed his hands up my sides along my ribcage, curved around my back and kept moving up till his hands were twisted in my hair and suddenly he was moaning in my mouth as his tongue gently massaged mine. This is everything I was hoping for that I was afraid his control would never let happen.

He gently pulled back and started pecking featherweight kisses along my jaw line and down my neck. "Edward, mmm," I purred as he gradually melted away my nervous tension with his hot passionate kisses. I groaned as I felt his hands twist tighter in my hair. He pulled almost to the point of being painful, but it was very erotic and instantly raised my arousal another notch. I reciprocated the gesture by sliding my fingertips from his face and fisting my own hands into his hair.

"Uuhhnn….Edward….I….mmmm….I want you…," I murmured as I struggled to form a coherent sentence.

"What?" he crooned against my neck. "Tell me Bella. Tell me what you want." As he did his cool breath shot straight through me and down to my thoroughly wet center.

In that moment I needed him so badly that I thought I would spontaneously combust if I didn't have him.

"Mmmm…I need you…'" I corrected, "I need you…hhmmm….inside me." I rasped between kisses I was working in along the side of his face to the crook beneath his ear.

So quickly I saw it in a hazy blur, Edward grabbed my waist, spun me around, and threw me to the bed. Suddenly I was pinned to the bed beneath his ice cold body and rock hard erection.

"Bella, Oh God Bella, I need you too…so much." As Edward said this he returned to fisting his right hand in my hair while slowly snaking his left hand down over my stomach and to my hot, wet, center. He then pulled the fabric of the black teddy aside and plunged his fingers into my soft folds.

"Uuuggghhh Edward, oh fuck." The contact was just what I wanted but more than I expected him to give me.

Edward then crushed his lips into mine with so much fierceness-so much passion-I knew that this was it. He was giving in and not holding back anything.

He was going to lose his control.

Sensing this I took my right hand and found the button to his jeans and his zipper, making quick work of removing his pants as he removed the hand from my hair to assist me. I then removed his shirt, groaning at the momentary loss of contact when his hand left my thoroughly dripping sex.

Edward then tried to gingerly remove my teddy but was having some trouble given he was still on top of me and I definitely didn't want to move and lose that contact again.

"Rip it Edward." I stated with a low growl in my voice.

"Bella….."

"Just fucking rip it off." I looked deep into his eyes so he knew I was serious and less than a second later I was as naked as he was.

I can't even begin to describe the feeling the first time our naked bodies came into contact. It was incredible. Nothing else in the world compares to feeling Edward naked on top of me.

His hand had returned to its ministrations over my clit and with every down stoke he would teasingly slip a finger in. It was driving me fucking insane and I now decided it was time to return that favor. I took my hand and found his cock and started stroking.

"Oh fuck Bella!" He then took the hand that wasn't busy elsewhere and placed it flat on the bed. Trying not to lose what little control he had left.

After a couple seconds, he seemed to be better and moved that hand to palm my breast, the other hand started working faster, more deliberate circles around my clit. He pinched my clit and my nipple at the same time and I groaned and felt my eyes roll in the back of my head. Edward's eyes went pitch black.

Oh. My. God. "Ohhh Eedwward…" I groaned and bit my bottom lip just a bit giving in to the moment. He then closed the little space between our faces and crushed his lips to mine. It was passionate. It was fucking incredible.

While teasing me with his fingers had been, in a way, an answer to my needing him inside me, it wasn't technically what I meant.

I took the hand that wasn't stroking his cock and fisted a handful of his hair breaking the kiss we were engaged in and looked deep into his eyes.

"Fuck me Edward. Fuck me hard and with everything you've got," I had never been quite this forceful before and wasn't sure how he would react.

I definitely didn't expect this.

Edward reached into the nightstand and pulled out a foil packet. I saw him rip it open and grabbed his wrist.

"I want to do it." I rolled with him so he was now beneath me and I was straddling him. I leaned down to kiss him and very lightly traced with my fingertips from his shoulder to his rock hard length. As I rolled it down, I let my fingernails just barely graze his shaft and my reward was a deep guttural moan.

Edward was nibbling at my ear, lightly scraping his teeth along my ear lobe and then murmured, "Bella you are so fucking sexy and now I'm going to show you just what you do to me."

Edward's velvety voice plus the word fuck mixed together equals one fucking horny Bella. My thighs were now drenched.

Edward switched us back to our original positions and rested his cock at my wet hot center. He looked deep into my eyes as he silently asked permission to do what we both so desperately wanted. Knowing words would not come close to expressing everything I wanted to tell him in that moment, I simply reached up and cradled his face in my hands and brought him to me for yet another, deep, passionate kiss.

Then in one fluid motion, Edward thrust into me completely.

Neither one of us was prepared for the intense sensation or the emotions that came with it.

At the exact moment Edward sheathed himself into me fully a loud "Fuck," slipped from my lips and my arms went above my head so my hands could grasp the headboard for support.

Edwards also muttered a "Fuck," simultaneously with mine but returned to placing his palms flat on the bed to maintain control.

We were both still for a moment, getting used to the way our bodies felt and fit together so perfectly. Then slowly Edward pulled out till only the tip was in and then thrust into me again as if to see if the sensation would still be too much.

"God damn Bella you are so fucking tight," Edward grunted out through clenched teeth. He was setting a rhythm with his thrusts now that had him hitting my sweet spot each time.

I was panting and breathing so hard that if I thought forming coherent sentences before was difficult, attempting it now would be just plain moronic. I brought him back to me to continue kissing him and let him know how blissfully happy I was by moaning in his mouth and lightly nibbling on his bottom lip.

I was thrusting my hips in time with Edward entering me fully. Our rhythm was perfect. He was hitting my G spot every time. It was like we were made to fit together perfectly which might explain the intense pleasure we felt every time he was fully sheathed inside me.

I reached out and took both Edward's hands in mine and brought each one to my mouth one at a time to kiss them while looking in his eyes to let him know I trusted him completely. I then led one to my breast and one to my clit and let go, knowing he would get the idea. I took one of my hands and fisted his hair, the other scratching my nails down his back.

We were moaning, panting, and sweating. I could feel my orgasm building and knew I was close, but wanted to come with him so I held it off. Just as I was about to verbalize this need to Edward, he beat me to it.

"Bella, love, come with me. I want to feel you come with me. I want to see it in your eyes."

That was it. That was my undoing and suddenly my body was shuddering and his name was falling from my lips with each convulsion of my orgasm. My moans of 'oh Edward' were almost inaudible, but I knew he could hear each one.

My orgasm triggered his and I realized that I had been wrong earlier when I thought that nothing else in the world compared to feeling Edward naked on top of me. There was something better and it was this. The feeling of Edward buried deep inside me and filling me with his warm liquid love. This feeling was giving me the best orgasm I had ever had. Of course I only had Jake to compare with, but that didn't matter. I was still sure this was the best orgasm I would ever have. That is until we made love again.

Edward coming down from his orgasm pulled me from my thoughts and I watched him carefully pull out of me and climb off the bed. He disposed of his condom in the wastebasket by the bed and then came back to join me.

I was staring into his eyes, completely blissed out, when he pulled me as close to his body as possible and kissed me. "Bella…"

I was about to say something in response, but I thought there was something off about his voice and I couldn't quite place what it was. He said my name again, I guess because I hadn't said anything since we had finished making love, but this time I was positive his voice was different. He definitely didn't sound like himself. I wondered what it was or why he would sound this way. I'm sure the look on my face conveyed my confusion and I had opened my mouth to ask him what was wrong when he spoke again.

"Bella you're going to be late." Now I was confused and still trying to place the difference in his voice. Then it hit me.

IT. WASN'T. HIS. VOICE.

It was Jacob.

I looked into Edward's eyes and started to cry. "I don't want to leave." I was cupping his face trying to hold on to what was left of my dream.

Edward spoke again, although this time I knew the voice was Jacob. "Bella, come on we have to go."

Even thought the voice was Jake, I answered as if it was Edward. The tears were soaking my dream pillow and Edward brushed the ones on my cheek with his thumb. "Please don't make me go."

"Bells, we are out of time. Wake. Up."

I kissed Edward one last time with everything I had. I looked at him and memorized his face as he gave me his signature crooked grin. It broke my heart into a million pieces. Then I did the impossible. I left my dream and Edward.

I opened my eyes to a clearly annoyed Jake. "It is about fucking time! I am so glad I convinced the doorman to let me in. Do you have any idea how late you're going to make us to the rehearsal dinner?!"

I made a mental note to have the doorman fired and told Jake I would be ready in 10 minutes. While Jake went on ranting and raving about being late and calling Sam and Abby, I went into the bathroom, locked the door, and cried silent tears for the love I had to say goodbye to and may never see again.

Starting tomorrow it would be different. Tomorrow began my search for the Cullens' and my fight for Edward

A/N: In all the time have written, I have NEVER written anything quite like this. It was an experiment and I wrote it as a dream sequence on purpose so that if I hated it or it didn't work I wasn't locked into using it. That said, I let fellow Twilighter and friend, shelbielyncullen, read it and she LOVED it. Her words. So here it is. Review, but be nice :) I am trying to respond to every review but it might take a while so be patient :) Don't forget that I give teasers for chapter 4 with your review!