Disclaimer: It's all Jo Rowling's. I just like to play with her toys every now and then. Cheers!

Chapter Three

The Funny Bunny Confusion

'Mum?' he managed, and wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug. She stiffened, clearly not expecting this reaction from her usually serious and emotionally distant son, but soon relaxed into the embrace, stroking her son's hair back with her hand. The Evanses looked at each other askance, surprised at the display of affection from the usually withdrawn teenager. Just moments ago he had monosyllabic and sullen, but now his face was alive and happier than they had ever seen it. Mrs Evans raised an eyebrow at her husband, but he merely shrugged in reply, and started glancing around again for a sight of Lily on the platform.

Leaning back, Eileen smiled at Severus, a weary grin that somehow lit up her face and look years younger than she usually did.

'Let's go,' she said softly, and he nodded, as her smiled dropped, probably at the thought of returning home.

'Thank you, Mr and Mrs Evans,' he called, turning around realising he had not said goodbye, as his mother lead him out of the barrier and towards the car, which would take them to the sorry place they called home.

They bundled into the old rusted car and Eileen gave him a funny look when he put his seatbelt on. He realised not many people actually considered them compulsory when he was growing up, often forgoing installing them altogether until they were made mandatory. 'They're designed to keep us safe,' he said to his mother, somewhat defensively, but she merely raised an eyebrow at her teenage son. 'Do yours up too,' he implored, keeping his black eyes on hers, but she started the car and looked in the rearview mirror, ready to back out.

'How was Hogwarts?' she asked, and her face was animated. She relished these few quiet moments, he thought, that she could discuss the magical world with her son without her husband to bring down the two's memories.

'Good, mostly.'

'Still passing all your classes?' she asked.

'I think so,' he said, confident in his OWL results having already known most of them, except for perhaps the Transfiguration theory paper. 'I won't know until I get my OWLs,' Severus reminded her.

'Oh, of course. Why mostly good then?' Severus deliberated whether to confide in his mother, who seemed in a good mood. Sometimes when she was away from his father she seemed almost normal. He decided he didn't really have all that much to lose, and perhaps his mother would have a different female perspective on how to get Lily to forgive him.

'I uh, accidentally hurt someone I cared about.'

'Ooh, a heart breaker, eh, Sevvy?' She teased, and laughed when Severus blushed. It had been such a long time that he had been teased like that by anyone that he wasn't quite ready for it.

'It's not like that,' he insisted, his normally pale face still red.

'Lily Evans,' she acknowledged. Severus gaped at his mother, oblivious to the fact that she had been aware of his feelings for the fiery redhead.

'How did you-?'

'You only try to spend every waking minute with the girl you can when you're home.' At that, Severus felt a flash of guilt. It was true, Severus had tried to spend as little time at home as possible during the summer, leaving his mother exposed to his father's abuse. He truly was a coward, he thought.

'I guess so,' he acknowledged. 'Although I'm afraid I hurt her quite a bit, so she might not want to hang out much this summer, if at all.'

'Apologise, Sev, she'll come round,' his mother decided, still smiling from managing to embarrass her son, and nudged him. 'When did you grow up so quickly?' she asked. Severus stilled, internally cursing himself. He had to be careful, even with his mother, not to reveal that he too, was thirty-eight, at least on the inside.

'I don't know,' he replied vaguely with a smile, hoping she wouldn't continue this vein of conversation as they pulled into Spinner's End and their run down house came into view.

'I hope your father's home,' she said lightly, causing Severus to darken and dread the confrontation he knew must eventually come.

X

Lily lay with her legs propped over the opposite arm of the chair, her red hair spread out behind her as she gazed at the television. Having been home from Hogwarts for just under a week now, she was missing the magical world she had become accustomed to and the friends she had made there. In order to console herself, she had gotten up early on a lazy Sunday to watch cartoons, a childhood habit she and her sister had shared for years before Lily started attending Hogwarts.

The doorbell rang, and as expected, Petunia flew past the TV set to the foyer, giggling giddily that her boyfriend was here for their impending lunch date. Lily ignored this rude interruption and returned her attention to the television.

Currently on the screen were her favourite Looney Tunes adversaries, the Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote. Predictably, the anvil that the coyote had designed to fall on the bird had made an anvil shaped hole in the ground where Wile had just been, with solely his feet sticking out. Lily still laughed, because although she was incredibly bored and missed her friends and Hogwarts, an anvil falling on a prankster was just inconceivable enough to be funny. Wile got up, stars spinning around his head and eyes unfocused as Road Runner made his trademark "meep meep!" sound…

'Hi.'

Not unlike Road Runner, Severus Snape also possessed a voice unequal to any other. Uttering just one word in that soft way, Lily's eyes had widened in recognition and she struggled to leap out of the chair to face the boy.

'Freakazoid was at the door,' interjected Petunia sulkily, obviously disappointed that her new boyfriend Vernon was running late.

'Lily, I-' Lily cut him off before he had a chance.

'What? No, I don't want to talk to you, you-'

'Trouble in Freakville?' asked Petunia sagely.

'No!' replied both Lily and Severus together. Lily resumed glaring at him, pondering the quickest way to get him away from her and out of her life.

Having caught on that something was amiss, Petunia laughed scornfully at Snape.

'What's wrong, Snape? Finally figure out that she doesn't like you? Or is it that my freaky sister does like you, and you don't know what to do?' Snape reddened considerably, opening his mouth to trade insults with Petunia, but Lily got there first.

'Tuney, just-!' Lily shouted, exasperated at her sister.

'Pet-toon-ee-ah!' hissed her sister, enunciating each syllable aggressively before turning and stalking up the stairs. Lily huffed in frustration before turning her attention back to Snape.

'You,' she started, physically pushing him back towards the entrance, 'need to,' he started resisting, opening his mouth in protest, 'stay away from me!' she finished loudly, overriding his objections.

'What is all this noise?' asked a voice from the staircase. Upon seeing Severus, Lily's mother smiled warmly.

'Oh, Severus, how nice to see you!'

Lily immediately dropped her hands from Snape's shoulders where she had been pushing him and put on a friendly façade for her mother.

'Hi Mum, we were just going to…'

'Watch some television,' Severus interjected smoothly, spying the box in the corner. 'It's nice to see you too, Mrs Evans,' he returned sincerely.

Despite the fact that Lily had been attempting to push Severus back out towards the front door, Mrs Evans seemed to miss any tension or awkwardness between the two, and she promptly continued down the stairs towards the teenagers.

'Would you like to stay for lunch, dear?'

'Oh, no, Mum, Severus has to-'

'To stay for lunch would be wonderful, Mrs Evans,' Severus again interrupted, whilst Lily shot him a glare.

'Mum,' Lily said, 'isn't Petunia's boyfriend coming over to meet us all? It might be a bit daunting introducing so many people at once.' Mrs Evans started shaking her head, as she had heard the same argument from Lily for three days concerning the upcoming lunch with Petunia ad this boy, Vernon, but Lily continued. 'I think you know, the more people that are there makes it more intimidating, don't you?' she wheedled, simultaneously hinting to Severus that he wasn't welcome and trying to prevent her own appearance at the meal.

'Nonsense,' Mrs Evans replied. 'I highly doubt that meeting a pair of teenagers is more daunting for the boy than meeting his girlfriends parents, Lily, but nice try.' Lily frowned at her mother. 'Weren't you going to watch telly?' she reminded.

'What?' Lily asked, confused. 'Oh, I- yeah, I guess we were,' she replied miserably. Her mother gave her a concerned glance and continued into the kitchen whilst the teenagers stood awkwardly apart from each other, staring.

Lily was the first to break eye contact, huffing and turning to head resignedly back into the sitting room. Severus followed cautiously, having won the first battle, but determined to win the war that was changing Lily's stubborn mind.

'Lily, I-' he started again.

'It's nice to see you too Mrs Evans,' she parroted, plonking herself back into the armchair and focusing on the television, which was now showing a cartoon of Tweety, Granny and Sylvester. 'Merlin, Snape.'

'Your mother has always been pleasant to me,' stated Severus. Lily snorted.

'That's never stopped you from being yourself before. No, you're just being nice because now I've opened my eyes and saw you for what you really are, a dark-arts-lover who wants nothing more than to be a Death Eater!' she whispered, glancing back towards the kitchen entrance for any sign of her mother.

'Lily, that's not what I-'

'Stop saying my name!' she hissed. 'I don't want to talk to you.'

Severus obliged, being quiet and taking a seat on the couch opposite Lily and silently appraised her. This meeting was not going any better than their last verbal encounter outside Gryffindor tower.

Lily, uncomfortable under Severus' prolonged stare, finally raised her gaze from the television and fixed her eyes on him and waited.

'I don't want to become a Death Eater,' he said quietly, 'and I will never call you or anyone else that word ever again.' He kept his eyes fixed on hers, and remained perfectly still whilst he waited patiently for an answer.

Lily sighed, thinking back to all the promises they had made together, and especially the ones he had broken. She heard her voice from two weeks ago confirming exactly what he was denying now.

'You and your precious Death Eater friends- you see, you don't even deny it! You don't even deny that's what you're all aiming to be! You can't wait to join You-Know-Who, can you?'

Lily felt the sinking feeling from that night when he didn't immediately reject the idea that he and his friends were planning to join You-Know-Who, and the final loss of her childhood friend to the evil path that he had chosen. The feelings from that night welled up in her again, and she thought of how her friend had made her feel better afterwards.

'You've made promises like that before, Snape,' she replied softly, looking into his eyes to see if she could tell if he was sincere or not. As always, Severus gave away none of what he was feeling.

'I know,' he acknowledged.

'So how would I know if you're actually going to keep them?' she asked.

'You don't,' Severus admitted sadly. 'To get you to trust me again, I will have to keep my promises.'

'I don't know… I just-' Again she sighed, appearing unsure of what to say. 'I don't want to talk about it anymore. Can we not talk about it anymore and just watch TV?'

'But we will talk about it?' Severus persisted, wanting to ensure that she would at least talk to him again after this.

Lily didn't reply, giving him an exasperated look and focusing her attention once again on the television set. He remained quiet, accepting that she was at least tolerating his presence at the moment, which was far better than the cold greeting he had received at King's Cross. He too turned his attention to the television set, where what appeared to be a black creature from outer space in a Roman headdress was attempting to capture an extraordinarily intelligent rabbit that somehow kept thwarting him. Severus let a few minutes pass in silence before asking, 'What is this program?'

'For Merlin's sake, Severus, you have a TV!' Lily burst out in frustration at the boy, only to realise how ridiculous she sounded after the outburst. She abruptly started laughing as she attempted to explain Marvin the Martian and Bugs Bunny to Severus as he became more confused.

The doorbell announced Petunia's forthcoming squealing, but Severus and Lily ignored the commotion at the door as Severus tentatively asked, 'Does this mean we're friends again?'

Lily considered the question, but decided not to answer. 'You are staying for lunch, right?' she quipped, a flicker of a smile on her face.

Severus was content with that. No, that wasn't a yes, but it wasn't a no either, and Lily was at least comfortable enough to joke with him again, even a little sarcastically, for the first time in a long twenty-two years.

X

Lily settled comfortably back on the couch, a N.E.W.T. Charms textbook open on her lap.

Whilst she loved her parents, she couldn't help but feel a little isolated from the world she had come to know and love over the last five years, and found it particularly frustrating abstaining from performing magic. Especially when it prevented her from practicing interesting bits of magic that she wouldn't usually find time to practice over and over inside Hogwarts.

'What're you reading?' a voice interrupted her thoughts, and Lily looked up to find Petunia heading for the kitchen, obviously looking for their mother in her hangout. Neither of the girls had inherited their mother's love of cooking, and thus the tendency to hang out in the kitchen, that was for sure.

'Nothing you'd be interested in,' she snapped back, irritated at losing her train of thought.

'Fine,' Petunia replied coolly, turning away to stop Lily from seeing the tears forming at the corners of her eyes. She had noticed that something was bothering her younger sister, and had actually been inquiring to find out what was upsetting her. But if Lily didn't want to talk to her, that was just fine. She was proud that she managed to keep her voice steady as she continued, 'Just make sure you're not reading that when Vernon gets here.' She put an emphasis on "that" to show Lily that it was distasteful, inserting as much scorn as she could into the single word. Lily looked up angrily.

'He's coming here again?' she complained, closing the book. She wouldn't be able to study or concentrate anyway, with that pig coming and leering at her superiorly like she was the most despicable person on the planet. Which Petunia probably told him I am, she thought. 'Didn't you have enough of snogging him yesterday?'

'No,' Petunia replied primly, looking faintly embarrassed, and she continued towards the kitchen.

'Is he at least going to be more polite to me this time?' Lily called after her. Petunia stopped and turned to face her sister.

'Whatever do you mean?' she asked in an innocent voice, insulted and quite willing to pick a fight especially now that Lily was being difficult. Lily's face darkened, and she stood from the couch.

'You know exactly what I mean.'

'No, I don't,' Petunia insisted. The doorbell rang.

'The way he looked and talked at Severus and me at lunch yesterday!'

'So suddenly you and that freak are friends again?' Petunia asked, her voice rising. 'You didn't even want him here yesterday!'

Mrs Evans came out of the kitchen at the second ring, wondering why neither of her daughters had answered the door, but they just stood arguing in the middle of the lounge. She sighed, remembering a time when her girls had once gotten along and headed for the front door, to find a large teenager holding a bunch of sad looking pink flowers in his hand.

'Come in, Vernon,' she murmured, taking the proffered flowers and immediately sitting them in a empty vase sitting in the hall on the table. 'Thank you for the flowers,' she said graciously, although after naming her two children after her particular favourite flowers, she wondered at how he could bring such a pathetic looking bunch to her house.

'You're welcome, ma'am,' he said importantly, following her inside, just as Lily started yelling.

'Severus has just as much of a right to be here as that- that pig!' Lily yelled from behind her, as her mother whipped her head around as Petunia pushed Lily back angrily, and she fell back onto the couch.

'Girls,' she interrupted warningly, but the girls either weren't listening or didn't hear her, she wasn't sure which. She turned to see a look of distaste on Vernon's face at being called a pig by Lily, but he didn't say anything, simply staring at the girls before him.

'Take that back!' Petunia said, standing over Lily menacingly.

'Why should I,' Lily answered coolly. 'It's the truth, isn't it?'

'Girls!' Petunia turned, her fists raised, which she lowered hastily when she saw her boyfriend.

'Vernon,' Petunia greeted in a fake girly voice that Lily had never heard her se before. 'Let's go.'

'Don't,' Lily interjected crossly, grabbing her book bag and shoving her Charms book inside. 'I don't want to be around such small-minded muggles as yourselves, anyway.'

'Fine!' Petunia screamed at her, ultimately insulted by the word muggle with tears now starting to trickle down her face. Vernon looked bewildered at being called a muggles, and quite a bit nervous at being present between the two feuding sisters. 'Just go, then!'

'Lily!' yelled her mother, truly hurt that Lily would use her sister's lack of magic against her. Lily turned on her mother savagely, no longer ready to listen as her anger boiled over.

'No!' she yelled. 'I'm sick of her telling me that I'm a "freak", I'm abnormal, just because I'm a-'

'LILY!' Petunia screamed, covering Lily's use of the word witch in front of Vernon. Lily screamed back in frustration, viciously pulling her long hair out from under the strap of her bag where it was caught.

'Girls!' yelled Mrs Evans a third time to no effect, and Lily turned, heading for the front door as her mother called after her.

X

Apart from spending a few hours with Lily yesterday, Severus had mostly stayed in his teenage bedroom, only coming downstairs to eat and use the bathroom. Apparently, this sullen behaviour was expected from their teenage son, because Eileen and Tobias had paid little attention to their son's conduct in the last four days. This situation had been a surprise, because Severus had never contemplated that in his teenage years he had been as bratty and insolent as his former students. There was so much he wanted to change this time around.

He needed to think about what he wanted out of this second chance. Yes, keeping his friendship with Lily had been his first priority, and in a way, it still was. Coming back, Severus was loathe to admit that he had not considered any other factor but a future with Lily in his decision.

At the time, he had been emotional, and uncharacteristically he had not considered any of the details except how he felt about the situation. It was a very Lily-like decision, he thought with a small smirk, to decide based purely on his emotions and worry about the consequences later, but now he needed to stop, think and consider everything in the wider complex.

First, he had died in the Shrieking Shack, murdered by the Dark Lord by the last horcrux, Nagini. He had given the Potter boy copies of his memories, and then he had met with a surprisingly helpful Potter Senior, who had directed him into his current situation, which did have its advantages and disadvantages. Best of all, obviously, was that Lily had at least tolerated his presence at a lunch with her family, which although a miserable affair, meant that he at least had hope of becoming friends with her again.

On the downside, he was an adult in a teenager's body, and that came with certain drawbacks. Certainly, he was a very independent man, but found himself under his father's controlling roof, with no money and an inability to perform magic unless he was under his father's roof because of the Trace. Thankful that he knew the ministry rarely followed up magic in wizarding families, he had used this to his advantage where he could, but being used to utilising magic so much every day, it was a strain on his patience. His father also hated him using magic where he could see, another reason for Severus to keep it under wraps.

Tobias was a gambler. Every pay check was spent down at the local pub, usually losing on the ponies. On the occasions when he had a win, Tobias would go on a drinking binge. Severus as a teenager had always looked forward to the weekend during the summer, because it meant less interaction with his father, but come Monday (or perhaps Wednesday if he had a particularly good win), that relief would turn to bitterness and fear. For the first few days, Severus and his mother felt relief at the lack of Tobias' presence around the house when he was out carousing, drinking and Merlin knows what else. Then the dread would set deep in the teenage Severus' stomach, for when his father would get home and take out his hangover on his battered wife and scared child.

It was in an inebriated state that Severus found his father in when he ventured down the stairs midafternoon, five days after he had arrived in Spinner's End. Tobias had obviously won big the previous Saturday, because he was out on the couch, another three bottles of whiskey half drank sitting on the floor beside him. His mum was in the kitchen cleaning up the mess Tobias had made stumbling in through the kitchen this morning.

'Hi,' he ventured quietly to her, not wanting to wake the man so he would have to deal with him.

'Lunch?' she asked, pointing towards the stove, where some sort of stew was sitting, having been cooked in between the cleaning.

'Thank you,' Severus said, and he took a bowl from the

'Your father's home,' Eileen commented.

'So I saw,' Severus said distastefully, sitting down at the worn kitchen table

'Severus…' warned his mother. He ignored the warning.

'You need to leave him, Mum,' Severus forced through clenched teeth.

'Don't you love your father, Severus?' she questioned sadly, looking at him as if he were the monster instead of the man in the room opposite, passed out on the couch. He reflected on the difference between the woman who had met him off the Hogwart's Express and the woman who stood before him now. His mother was a smart, educated woman who away from Tobias, was likeable and playful at times, even if a little reserved and shy with strangers. Around Tobias, however, she was nervous and fidgety, looking towards the lounge every few seconds, barely cracking a smile and never dared be teasing, even with her own son, lest Tobias overhear.

'How can I love a person who treats someone like that?' he said back, unceremoniously slurping another spoonful of stew.

'He doesn't mean it,' Eileen immediately protested, coming to her husband's defence. 'I make him angry.'

'At least once a week, after he starts drinking?' Severus replied bluntly, but he never heard her reply, as Tobias had woken and had yelled for Eileen, who immediately left to tend to him without looking back. Severus got up from the table, leaving his meal and followed her, knowing that Tobias would likely be violent and wishing to put a stop to any more abuse towards his mother.

Eileen cringed as Tobias looked at Severus and immediately raised his hand to point at his son.

'Why is he wearing those clothes, Eileen?' His voice was not slurred anymore, but soft and dangerous, much like Severus' when he had intimidated Gryffindor students in his class. Severus recognised the change and positioned himself in a stance to protect his mother from Tobias.

'I am more comfortable in robes, father,' Severus replied evenly, as Eileen tried to stand in front of Severus. He pulled her back behind him and gave her a look that said to stay there, but she ignored it in an attempt to protect Severus.

'Did I ask you a question, boy?' his father sneered, taking a step toward Severus and Eileen. Severus had his hand in his pocket, ready to draw his wand if need be.

'Toby, leave him alone,' his mother said softly behind him. This time, she didn't cringe as Tobias took another step towards them. She was resigned to what was coming, but Severus refused to budge.

Severus pulled out his wand, pointing it directly at the centre of Tobias' chest. 'Get away from her,' he spat. Tobias laughed drunkenly, unaware that this time, his son was serious in the threat. He did not fear his father as he had the last time he was a teenager. Severus had dealt with far worse. He had killed people.

'Get back, Tobias,' he said, and his mother got from behind him and tried to insert herself roughly between Tobias and Severus, but Severus pulled her back to his side with his other arm.

'Go on, do it then, boy.' When Severus didn't respond, he whispered, 'coward'. He knew full well Severus would hear him.

'Severus, no!' his mother insisted, identifying the look in Severus' eyes. His hands shook with anger, and Severus stood there with his wand aimed to kill, his eyes expertly trained on his father.

His father finally seemed to recognise the danger his son was presenting and let go of Eileen's arm. Instead of shrinking back from the danger, Tobias curled his lip and leered at his son.

'You pull that shit on me boy, and you'll get kicked out of that freak school you go to,' he threatened.

Severus advanced, wand now pointed at his father's throat. He tried calming himself by putting up his Occlumency shields, mentally forcing himself to let go of his emotions…

'Coward,' his father insulted again, and the Occlumency shields broke before he had completed them. A wave of hate for his father rushed through him, and how he hated that word. Tobias was the coward, for beating his mother, for thinking love was an emotion ruled by fear, and mostly, for bullying Severus into submission all his life. All bullies were cowards.

Severus hated being called a coward, because that was the primary insult that his father used against him. Every summer during his youth, he had vowed never to allow that man hit his mother, to find a way out of the situation the family found itself in, but come every September the First, it was the same situation, and Severus would find himself travelling on the train back, feeling ashamed, and more than a little relieved to be away from his father.

'You won't do it,' his father mocked, and his lips formed the word once more 'Coward.' Severus saw rather than heard it.

'I don't care anymore,' Severus said simply, his wand arm never wavering. Eileen, sensing the threat Severus posed was now genuine, screamed again and lunged for the wand from behind Severus.

'Sectumse-' Severus was cut off as a punch from his father landed on his right temple, but what he had managed to say was effective as the spell gouged a line in the wall as his mother redirected his wand arm with the lunge and snatched the wand out of his hand.

Tobias continued his assault, barely stopping, but Severus managed to get a few back.

'Don't hurt…him!' Eileen screamed, as punch after punch landed on Severus, as he attempted to shield his face, but some of the lunges got through. His mother, from what he saw, was trying to pull Tobias back ineffectively, but she was swatted away as if she were a fly. She had dropped his wand onto the ground in her desperation to pull back Tobias.

Severus uncovered his face and quickly jabbed his fist in the direction of his father's throat. He didn't miss, and Tobias collapsed, clutching at his windpipe and struggling to breathe. He may be the bigger and physically more imposing man, but Severus had survived two wizarding wars, and being without a wand was not a situation he had wanted to be vulnerable in. He grabbed his wand off the floor and headed for the front door, not looking back as he jogged into the warm summer night.

X

'Sev?' a voice asked behind him, and Severus realised Lily was sitting at the tree opposite to the one he had been walking to. 'What're you doing- you're bleeding!' she exclaimed in a high pitched voice, standing up quickly and putting a hand to the cut under his right eye.

Severus shied back, shocked at seeing her there. He hadn't seen her in this spot since she had denounced him all those years ago. It was sacred to him, a spot that she and he solely shared between them, and he was surprised to see that she also still came here. He briefly wondered what she was doing here, considering it was nearing dusk, and closer to his shady neighbourhood than her respectable one.

'I'm fine,' he said, but his hand reached up to cover hers that was gently probing around his eye and temple to check if there was serious damage.

'You're not fine,' she insisted hotly. 'What happened?' Severus gulped, a well of shame pooling up inside of him.

'Lily, I almost-' he faltered, stopping himself from shattering the innocence that was Lily. He couldn't admit the truth of what had almost happened earlier to her, so he substituted a half-truth. 'I almost used magic on my father.'

'Severus!' Lily exploded, looking horrified. 'You'll be expelled for sure!'

Severus took a step back, not expecting such a harsh reaction from what he thought, was a relative minor offence in his mind. Of course, being muggleborn, Lily couldn't be expected to get away with any magic in her household, but Severus' mother was a witch, which ensured lest he actually performed magic on a muggle, or in plain view of a muggle excluding immediate family. In barely preventing himself from cursing his father, he had averted further action from the ministry of magic. He quietly explained this to Lily.

'That's so unfair,' she whined, and Severus winced at her tone of voice. He was developing a thumping headache, and couldn't heal it himself in the obviously muggle neighbourhood. 'Sorry,' she muttered, a lot softer than before. 'I can't believe non-muggleborns can get away with that, though! I wanted to practice some charms I read about earlier, but obviously I can't,' she lamented as she babbled. 'What happened with your dad?'

'Nothing new.'

Severus saw a flicker of pity in Lily's eyes. He tried to smile reassuringly at her, but it came out more of a pained grimace. Severus had not had much to smile about in the last twenty years.

'I want to show you something,' he said to Lily, getting up and holding out his hand. She ignored it, helping herself up. Severus sighed. In his other life before the incident by the lake, Lily had held his hand any number of times.

In his past life, Severus had felt shame whenever the subject of his home life came up, and had avoided the subject with Lily whenever possible. In hindsight, Lily had not fully understood why Severus had hated Muggles as a teenager. Growing up in a loving home with two supportive parents, she could not fathom the abuse he and his mother went through on a daily basis. Having the time to think about it over the past week since coming back to Spinners End, Severus had realised that the more he tried to hide things in the past, the more alienated Lily had become from him. If he was to succeed at winning Lily's trust again, he'd have to keep no secrets from her.

'Where are we going?' she asked, watching where she walked as they turned down a rough cobblestone laneway.

'My house,' Severus replied, watching for her reaction. Lily's eyes widened, but she didn't say anything. In the time they had known each other, Severus avoided mention of his home life, and actively worked at keeping Lily as far as possible from his father.

They walked silently through the streets, twilight setting in as the surroundings became increasingly run down and he started talking.

'All I ever wanted was to protect my mother and myself from Tobias,' he admitted, looking into Lily's eyes. 'My hatred of Muggles, it comes from him. I assumed that all Muggles were like him. I know that they aren't,' he hastened to add, seeing Lily open her mouth angrily. 'Especially your parents. Earlier tonight, I didn't just almost use magic on my father, it was a dark curse.' Lily slowed, staring at him, and Severus was terrified. He had used dark magic, her fear for him, and the reason she had turned away from him in the first place. In time, perhaps Lily would have forgiven him for the slur he had slung at her, but she never would have forgiven the dark magic he had used and participated in in his former life.

'What curse?' she asked stiffly.

'Sectumsempra.' Upon seeing that Lily had no idea what that was, he added, 'a sort of cursed slashing. The wounds don't heal easily.' Lily gasped, horrified, and stopped walking altogether. Her mouth opened and closed, clearly struggling with forming the correct words.

'How could you, Severus?' she hissed, looking around to ensure there were no muggles nearby. They were about halfway to his house, and the streets were slightly more populated.

'Please don't hate me,' he begged, also glancing around. 'I'm trying to be honest, and I don't want to hide things from you.'

'Maybe you should,' Lily muttered carelessly, and Severus flinched. 'Sorry,' she said upon seeing his expression. 'I'm a little bitchy today.' Severus tried to deny this, but she ignored him, sitting down and pulling him onto the long-grassed nature strip beside her. 'You said yesterday that you wanted to earn my trust, and I guess you're being honest, so that's a start. Not that using dark curses is a good thing, obviously. Although your father is… not very nice. But that's not an excuse for using dark magic, and you told me you didn't want to go dark… and I'm rambling,' she concluded after the argument with herself, looking at him. 'You have to stop me when I do that, you know.' He opened his mouth, but she didn't give him a chance to reply. 'Tell me what happened,' she ordered, looking into his eyes. Severus looked down.

'Father was passed out, and Mum and I were talking. I was in my robes,' he gestured towards his clothes, which, he realised, he should have changed before taking off into the muggle neighbourhood. 'He, you know, doesn't really like the magical side of things-' Lily nodded, she knew that.

'Kind of like Petunia,' she realised.

'-and he picked a fight.' Lily looked at him, confused.

'If you knew he was picking a fight, then why did you…' Comprehension dawned on her face as she realised why. 'Your mother was there.' He nodded.

'Then he called me a coward, and I just… snapped.'

'That I understand.'

Severus looked up in surprise.

'Did you really forget that I blasted you across the hall a few weeks ago,' she asked incredulously. 'Because I certainly haven't.'

'I deserved it,' Severus muttered, looking down. He had caused that, not her.

'No,' she said seriously, making sure he looked into her eyes to see that she was earnest. 'No one deserves to have magic tear at their bodies. I should have found a way to tell you that I couldn't handle talking to you without blasting you. I lost my temper.'

'But at least yours was accidental magic,' he argued, trying to assure her that she hadn't done anything wrong, and least in his eyes. 'Mine was… purposeful.' He looked at Lily to see her reaction, but none really came from her.

'You have made a mess of things, you know,' she stated, a little unnecessarily. That was pretty clear, but Severus clamped down his tendency to snap sarcastically at obvious comments.

'I know,' he replied instead, simply and miserably.

'You didn't hit him though, right?' she asked, her voice small.

'Not with the curse,' he said, leaving the implication that he had physically hit his father, but Lily didn't seem too upset by that allegation. She got up and offered him a hand, much like he had her earlier that evening.

'Let's go,' she said, indicating the direction of his house.

'Really?' he asked, surprised she wasn't running for shelter, screaming from the crazy lunatic, but taking her proffered hand nonetheless. It was small and delicate in his long wiry fingers, but had a surprising strength behind as she helped heave him up.

'Yup.'

'What about the dark curse?' Severus questioned.

'Well,' Lily replied, frowning. 'I'm not condoning what you did, but I understand you were angry. Are you going to use it again on somebody else?'

'Never,' Severus vowed seriously, and realised that without him to spread the knowledge, Sectumsempra would remain known only to him, and now Lily. He had invented it during his sixth year, foolishly writing it in his potions book for any like-minded fool to read. That was a mistake he would not be making again.

'Then I don't see the problem,' Lily admitted. 'Are you serious about not wanting to know more Dark Magic?' she asked, looking at Severus.

'Dead serious.' She smiled.

'Looks like we both need to work on our tempers though,' Lily said, giving his hand a squeeze, which she had never let go of as they reached Severus' house. They could hear unintelligible screaming from within.

'Your family are loving and caring, and I wish I'd grown up with parents like yours,' he admitted, his eyes glued to the house where his mother was probably being subjected to spousal abuse at that second.

Lily took Severus' hand in both of her own and directed her gaze back toward his family home. Severus was grateful. He had never found it easy to discuss difficult matters with anyone, even his Lily. With this one thing, Lily showed she understood him, and Severus felt an overpowering wave of love at the silence she granted him as they listened to the sobbing that was clearly coming from his mother.

Let me know what you think!

~Matilda~