A/N – Thanks to everyone for the wonderful feedback on the first chapter! Your questions and comments are so appreciated! I know that a few of you did not expect this story to start how it did, but I hope that as it continues to move along – it becomes what you hoped for!

Lots of love and gratitude to my fab beta and lyric girl, changedbyEdward for not killing me over the multiple versions of this chap! MWAH bb!

Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight world. No copyright infringement intended.


If you had not have fallen
then I would not have found you
Angel flying too close to the ground
I patched up your broken wing and hung around for a while
trying to keep your spirits up and your fever down
So leave me if you need to, I will still remember
Angel flying too close to the ground.

I knew someday that you would fly away
for love's the greatest healer to be found
So leave me if you need to, I will still remember
Angel flying too close to the ground

Fly on fly on past, the speed of sound
I'd rather see you up than see you down
So leave me if you need to, I will still remember
Angel flying too close to the ground.

- Willie Nelson -


(Angela's POV)

It took several tries before I finally sat myself down and began to write again. Between settling in, renewing acquaintances with our human caretakers, phone calls from various family members checking on me, hunting, and my own sheer laziness, I realized that I had been avoiding my project for several days. Not that it really mattered, as I had no plans to share this with anyone – it was a purely therapeutic endeavour.

It wasn't as if I hadn't thought about it at all though – I had made one decision concerning the task that lay at hand. If I was going to record my, albeit brief, history as a vampire, I would do it in its entirety. That meant from the beginning – even the darkest days in the beginning that I would give just about anything to forget. Unfortunately a vampire has perfect recollection so that was not likely to happen.

Staring at the blank screen for only a few moments, I rested my fingers on the keys and allowed myself to drift into the past…

My first coherent thought in what seemed an eternity was one of relief when I assumed that the end had finally come and I was at peace at last. The scorching lava that had been coursing through my veins had ceased and my entire body felt as light as a feather. I had always wondered what it would be like to be an angel and I was finally going to get my answer, assuming of course that I had met all the requirements and not been sent in the other direction. Would I have wings? Would I be dressed in glowing robes of white and gold? Would I carry a harp and sing?

Fantasies of my angelic future were all too soon interrupted by bell-like voices whispering softly to one another. Anxious to meet whomever had come to greet me in my afterlife, my eyes fluttered open and I gasped in wonder as I watched thousands of colours dance against my skin in the sunlight.

"Angela?" I heard my name and turned towards the direction it came from, only to find several pairs of golden eyes looking back at me curiously. In an instant, I found myself crouched in a corner, my arms raised defensively and a snarling growl emanating deep from within my chest.

The voice spoke again. "Angela, it's alright. You are safe. We won't hurt you."

A rustle of movement and echoes of whispered conversation brought about another growl from my being. A sinking feeling came over me as I realized how unlikely it would be for an angel to growl. Unsure of what or where I was, I lowered my arms and glared sullenly towards the man who had spoken to me.

Warm butterscotch eyes watched me cautiously as he raised his hands to show me he meant no harm. I continued to watch him silently as he moved towards me slowly. I realized at once that he and I were now the only two in the room and I relaxed a little.

"How are you feeling, Angela?" His voice was soothing and warm and oddly familiar. I studied him carefully, taking in his classic attire and how boyishly handsome he was. Golden blonde hair and chiselled cheeks, he truly was exquisite and so very familiar. A flash of memory came to me – a visit to the hospital for a broken arm. He was a doctor. Perhaps I wasn't dead after all? Dr. Cullen had saved me?

"Dr. Cullen?" I asked quietly, immediately stunned to silence as I heard the same chiming melody from my lips that had been whispering in the room only moments before.

Sensing my alarm, he stopped short of where I still sat crouched. Extending his hand to me, he waited as I looked around for an escape route. "Angela, I promise that no harm will come to you. Please let me explain."

Sighing, I moved to take his hand only to realize that I had not been breathing in all the time I had been awake. Bewildered, I flew towards him, shoving him against a wall, the plaster cracking and falling to the ground around him. In an instant, I was pinned to the floor, held down by several arms.

"Relax Angela; no one is going to hurt you." A familiar feminine voice spoke to me softly and although I tried to see where it was coming from, my view was blocked by my captors. Snarling and snapping sounds escaped as I struggled against their hold, almost gaining release.

"She didn't mean to hurt me. Jasper, Emmett, please let her stand." Dr. Cullen's voice was still soft, yet full of authority. I stopped struggling as the arms that held me brought me upright, still holding me in place.

"Carlisle, you can't trust newborns." I turned my head to face the southern drawl and gasped as I took in the many small crescent scars that covered the skin of the man that stood next to me. Jasper. Alice's Jasper. My head whipped to the other side and I recognized Emmett's giant mitts for hands before I actually saw the cautious grin that fought to make its appearance on his face.

I relaxed in their grip, although I felt anything but that way. Looking up at Dr. Cullen, I found him watching me pensively. I couldn't help but feel that I was somewhat safe in his presence and instantly regretted throwing him into the wall, even though I was still completely baffled at how I had done it.

Finding my voice, I whispered an apology and waited for a reaction. Carlisle moved closer and motioned for Jasper and Emmett to release me. I sensed their hesitance, but was grateful when they led me to a chair and allowed me to sit. I knew they still stood behind me, ready to tackle me again if required, but at least I did not feel so restrained.

"Angela, I understand that you must have a hundred questions for me, but if I could ask you to be patient for a few more moments, I would like to ask a few things of you first."

I nodded in agreement and calmed as he smiled in response.

"You have been through quite an ordeal, my dear. I know that you recognize me. Do you remember Jasper and Emmett?"

I nodded again.

"Do you recall anything from the past few days, Angela?" I studied his face as he waited for me to answer. Not finding any reason not to respond, I finally spoke.

"I remember being in an extreme amount of pain. I felt as if I was burning alive." He nodded sadly and I continued. "There was an angel. I could feel her with me, holding me and trying to calm me."

Carlisle's face brightened significantly. "Yes, she is an angel of sorts, Angela. That was my wife, Esme. It will please her greatly that she was able to comfort you some."

I smiled apprehensively in response. "She really did. I would like to thank her if possible?"

"You already have child, but she will be in later to check on you. Do you remember anything before that?"

I could see the worry return to his eyes and I breathed in quickly, once again realizing that I had been without breath for quite some time. "What has happened to me, Dr. Cullen? Why am I not breathing?" I felt panic and tensed but then immediately relaxed again.

Catching a glance between Dr. Cullen and someone behind me, I whirled quickly, but not before Jasper and Emmett both had a hold of me. "What is going on and what are you doing to me?"

"Relax darlin', I mean you no harm." Jasper smiled gently even though his eyes remained guarded and his grip tight. He turned his attention elsewhere. "Carlisle, perhaps it would be best if we tell Angela what she needs to know now and fill her in on the details later? I am sure she must be…thirsty."

I hadn't really considered sustenance until that moment, but with his words I immediately realized that my throat was so dry it burned. I nodded in response. "I am feeling that way yes, but if I could have a bit of water I am sure I will be fine to continue."

I heard Emmett stifle a snicker and saw Carlisle grimace at him. As I was about to ask what was so funny, I heard a quick knock at the door and watched as Alice, looking more like a beautiful pixie than ever before, dance into the room.

Smiling at me, she turned to face Carlisle. "You need to tell her now, before she finds out on her own." Turning back towards me, she was beside me in an instant, wrapping her willowy arms around me in a fierce hug. Stunned, I responded without thinking and hugged her back.

"Everything will be alright, Angela. I know you're confused, but I promise it will all work out." She smiled at me brightly and quickly kissed Jasper on the cheek before she pirouetted out of the room as gracefully as she had entered it.

I was now more confused than ever and the thirst that had only been a dull ache in the back of my throat was becoming more and more difficult to ignore.

Sensing my discomfort, Jasper cleared his throat. "Carlisle, we need to tell her."

Carlisle nodded, his face clear of all emotion. "Angela, I had hoped that you would remember some of what I have to tell you on your own dear, but unfortunately for your own safety, we can't wait. You were very badly injured when we finally got to you." He paused, waiting for some kind of reaction, but I was unable to give him one. I had no idea what had happened to me or how I had come to be in their company.

Carlisle continued softly. "By the time Edward got to you, you had lost a tremendous amount of blood. Your injuries were fatal, my dear."

I looked down at my body, clearly seeing that I was far from injured. I had never felt better or stronger. "I don't think I understand, Dr. Cullen."

"I'm sure you don't Angela. And there really is no way for me to explain this without causing you distress, but I beg of you to remain calm and keep in mind that we mean you absolutely no harm. You are safe with us."

His words were heartfelt, yet I was unable to take any comfort, because I knew what he had to tell me was going to change my life evermore. Something inside of me was gone, broken and forever lost to me...

I stared at the screen, reading over what I had written. Even now I remembered the horrible sense of loss I felt as Carlisle explained what they were, what I was and what I would need to do to survive. I am not sure how they expected me to react to the news that my life as Angela Weber was over, but my crumpling to the floor, heaving with tearless sobs was not what they had planned for.

I remember strong arms picking me up off the floor and holding me tightly as I mourned all that was lost to me. Soothing words and gentle touches were all around me, yet all I felt was numb. I was numb for a very long time.

Standing, I moved away from the laptop and stared out into the fading light. A sense of calm washed over me and I was thankful yet again that I had returned to this place, my first true home as a vampire. Scotland was home. I think it was because it reminded me of Forks in a way. It was green, damp and earthy and so very soothing. I watched the evening mist drop its sparkling dew on the ground and opened the window, breathing in deeply. Yes, so very much like Forks, yet different with the faint aroma of heather still adding its unique scent to the mixture.

I sat in the window seat, watching the last remnants of the day fall away to the dark night. It was the time of day that I loved the most, yet dreaded as well. Each day that faded away was another that I had spent alone. Most of the time I was able to keep myself busy and not allow myself the opportunity to ponder my lonely existence. It was not something I could afford to let myself wallow in as I knew it would be very difficult to pull myself out of that kind of funk.

Tonight was not one of those nights that I would be able to push away my lonely thoughts. I guess I could blame it on what I had been writing, but deep down I knew it was far more than that. My trip to Scotland had not only been to discover independence, it had been an escape.

I loved my family – they were all I truly cherished in this world, but the happiness that swarmed around the four couples was at times too much to bear. I knew they did their best not to shove it in my face, but sometimes it was just too difficult to ignore that there were four couples plus one.

As I became more comfortable being around humans, Bella and Alice urged me to socialize, mingle with people my age, but I resisted. I would never allow myself to become attached to a human, knowing I would either have to watch them age and eventually die or choose eternal damnation to walk alongside of me. I knew that this was something that Edward had struggled with when he met Bella and I just could not allow myself to fall into that same trap.

Sighing, I pushed away from the window and moved towards the bookshelf. I needed something to clear my head of these lonely thoughts. Smiling, I reached for the tattered copy of one of the many Buffy the Vampire Slayer books we had stockpiled in each and every house we owned. It was childish fluff, but the perfect escape that I required, always being a laugh at how humans pictured the many things that went bump in the night.

Relieved to have found the perfect distraction, I turned off the laptop and settled comfortably into one of the leather recliners, eager to lose myself to Buffy, Willow and the gang.


(Rev. Weber's POV)

The clock struck three times and the chimes echoed around the otherwise silent room. I sat in the darkness like so many times before, the small pewter-framed photo clasped tightly in my hands.

And like so many times before, the tears that always came deep in the night when no one else could see fell against the glass, clouding her beautiful face. How many nights had I sat here like this? I had lost count, but knew there had been at least fifteen. One for each year since she had disappeared.

To most people, I was Reverend Weber, a strong, brave man who did not question God or his teachings when the brightest light in my life was taken away. There were a few of course, like my loving wife, who knew some of the torment I felt, but it was something I buried away – at least most of the time.

But on this night which would have been Angela's 33rd birthday, the loss of my daughter was almost too much to bear. It was hard to believe that she had been gone almost as long as I had known her – the years seemed to pass so quickly, yet the pain was still so fierce. Lost, I prayed to God for understanding, for comfort, but still I mourned for her.

Placing the small frame on the desk in front of me, I unlocked and pulled open the drawer of my desk. My hand searched blindly for the cold steel, finding it almost immediately. Tightening my grip, I pulled the small revolver from its hiding place, cradling it in my palm as the tears continued to fall. It was loaded. I knew it was and had been since the night I bought it so long ago.

My body trembled as I turned the pistol in my hands, the cold touch of the metal soothing to my skin. Clicking the safety off, I brought the tip to my forehead, pressing it hard against my skin. My fingers teased at the trigger as I silently tempted the fates to grant me the peace that God had not.

A gentle breeze as light as a whisper moved against my skin and I opened my eyes to find the moonlight reflecting my daughter's silhouette in the frame. Her dark eyes were watching me so lovingly and I knew that once again my wish would be denied.

Switching the safety back on, I placed the gun back in its hiding place and locked the drawer. My hands trembled as I brought the frame to my lips and kissed the forehead of the one I had lost. My body shook, overcome with grief as I dropped my head in my hands and prayed to God once more, begging for forgiveness and freedom from strife.


End of chapter – would love to hear your thoughts on Angela's recollections so far!