Hige: I have summoned all the courage I have in my body to write this… I don't know if you can call it lime or lemon or yaoi or whatsoever. I just want you to know that this is my first time writing this kind of fic. Hope you like it
Title: Joke Time (1 of 2 Chapters)
Rating: M
Pairing: SasuNaru
Genre: Romance/Humor
Disclaimer: Absolutely not mine.
Warning: Wrong grammar, sexual stuff and OOCness. This may be the crappiest chapter I have ever written in my entire life but even though that's the case I wish you guys will never stop supporting me. Thank you very much!
Also the TV part here was taken from the show 'wowowee'.
Reply to my reviewers:
To all of you… Thank you very much for the heart warming reviews. I just want to let you know that the only reason why I'm still writing is for you, my dear readers. Again Thank you so much for your support!
Naruto was a very cheerful boy, he really is, but not today. Today has been the worst day of his life not only because his so called rival, Uchiha Sasuke, defeated him once again in their sparring session but also because he felt as if the sun was focusing all the heat on him. It was really soaking-in-sweat hot but the blond hero can't do anything about it. He's not rich to buy an air conditioner, so he settled in removing his sweater and jogging pants also know as jumpsuit.
The whiskered boy felt a little bit better. He flopped down on his sofa, only wearing a black sleeveless shirt and his boxers, and turned his television on. Naruto scanned the channels to look for a decent show to watch but before he could decide what to watch his stomach began rumbling. He stopped on a particular channel and went to the kitchen.
Seeing that the fridge was empty, he sighed. He picked up the only thing he could find inside, a bottle of milk which was thankfully not expired. He also went to the cabinet and reached for the cereal. The Kyuubi vessel made himself a breakfast-style lunch. It'll do for the mean time. He'll do the shopping later when the sun's out of sight.
Again he sat on his sofa and started munching on his meal before looking at the show he randomly chose. It was a game show and the host was currently interviewing the contestant who happened to be a not-so-obvious-comedian. The boy thought that he didn't mind watching it. Who knows it might be fun.
-----------------Television-----------------
Host: Why are you an impersonator? Who are you, really?
Boy: I'm just doing this because it's my job
Host: So what you mean to say is that… well, it's okay because you have the ability to make people laugh. You can make the sad audience happy, it's all that matters. Why are you doing this?
(Insert sentimental music here)
Boy: So that my boyfriend would be able to graduate.
(Naruto coughed a little at that, expecting something like, for the family or friends, that some of the milk spilled on his shirt but he didn't mind but continued watching instead)
Host: Do you want to tell him anything? Come on, walk closer to the camera.
Boy: You know… I really miss you. I remember the time when we used to be together. You were so sweet. The truth is before we sleep he covers my face with plastic and when I couldn't breath anymore he removes it and tells me he love me.
He's the person who taught me how to budget money. He eats rice with pork chop while I eat rice and catsup.
(Naruto laid down on his sofa holding his stomach while laughing. His face was red and he's sweating more than before.)
Boy: I love him. The truth is he never asks money from me. He willingly get the money from my wallet on his own. But now, we are separated from each other because my friends accused him of stealing my stuff. After all he's the only one who could enter my house freely. Suddenly my refrigerator disappeared. I love him that's why I didn't accuse him instead I told my friends that I just misplaced it.
Host: Now, say the thing you've been wanting to tell him.
Boy: Wherever you are right now…. Stay there.
Naruto dropped from the sofa and hit the floor as he laughed his heart out. Then there was a knock on his door. He picked himself up from the floor and dusted himself. He was still shaking and breathing hard from laughing . Naruto's face was red and sweating. His clothes was also messed up from all the rolling he did on the sofa and on the floor while hysterically laughing.
Without bothering to fix his appearance, Naruto opened the door revealing a very neat, like usually and unlike him, Uchiha. The stoic boy raised an eyebrow at him
"What do you want now?" Naruto said a little bit high pitched than his normal voice.
Sasuke just stared at him
----------------Kissy Kissy Plan no.1 Emergency meeting inside Sasuke's head----------------
Sasuke#1: What the hell happened to my Naruto?
Sasuke#2: Are those white stuff on his shirt…. semen? Of other guy?! And NOT ME?!
Sasuke#3: Calm down that's definitely not come… Naruto won't do anything like that… right? (turns to look at Naruto) OMFG!!!
Sasuke#8: (just woke up) What's going o---ahhhh! (covers eyes) My virgin eyes! I'm tainted! (runs in circle)
Suddenly alarm went off and red light blinks on and off.
Sasuke#1: Whoever is in their with Naruto will pay I tell you!
Sasuke#2: Cause only I have the right to make Naruto blush, breathless, messy, come and most of all claim him
Sasuke#1-200: (tiny little voices all together) "Sharingan!"
----------------End of Kissy Kissy Plan no.1 Emergency meeting inside Sasuke's head----------------
"Who's in there?" Sasuke suddenly asked his voice cold and deadly. Naruto quickly sensed the aura the other boy was emitting and panicked a little.
"What are you talking about?" Naruto slightly laugh as he scratched the back of his head. Sasuke eyed him form head to toe, then toe to head
"I hate repeating myself, you know that." the pale boy glared at the smaller one. Naruto stopped acting nervous and lowered his gaze to the floor letting his bangs cover his eyes.
"I'm alone. You knew that I'm always alone. Why do you have to ask now?" Sasuke felt guilty for actually accusing Naruto of such a dirty thing, it's not like Naruto would actually do it with other people right? And it's not like they've done it before because there's absolutely nothing between them. So he decided he should change the topic
"Ignore my first question. What are you doing?" Naruto's face lightened up as he heard a slightly worried tone in the Uchiha's voice
"Nothing much. Just watching TV. Come inside." The blond boy stepped aside to let his friend in
Come inside. Sasuke chuckled in his thoughts.
"What's on?" the brunette looked at the television set
"Oh, just a game show with a comedian as a contestant. He's really funny." Naruto sat back on the sofa
That explains why he's out of breath, flush and messed up… but that white thing… I guess I should ask
Sasuke stood in front of Naruto, which made Naruto angry
"Hey, I'm watching here!" He shouted at the taller boy still sitting on the sofa
"I wanted to ask you something." He began. His voice showed seriousness laced with jealousy
"What is it?" The blond boy answered back
"What is that?" Sasuke pointed at the lower part of his shirt where you could find the dried white substance
"Oh, that's the milk I spilt while laughing." Naruto responded innocently. "Why?"
"No reason." The older boy shrugged and sat beside Naruto and turned to the television
"Hey! Tell me what did you think it is?!" Naruto shook Sasuke
"Nothing."
"I don't believe you!"
"It's not important."
"Unfair!" Naruto pouted and Sasuke just stared trying to keep himself calm and miserably failing
"Fine." The brunette said
"Then…?" the blue eyed shinobi asked
"I thought it was…" He murmured the rest of the sentence
"What?"
"I said I thought it was…" Again he whispered the last part
"What?!"
"I thought it was come." Sasuke said silently
"Why would you--Gah!" Naruto pulled his shirt off immediately after what Sasuke said
"Sorry, is it better this way?" Naruto placed his hands on his hips. Sasuke looked at him, his onyx orbs widened a little in a split second then returned to it's normal size. Damn you Naruto Sasuke cursed in his mind. Naruto walked closer to Sasuke intending to pick up the forgotten bowl of cereal and bring it to the kitchen when he accidentally stepped on the milk that he accidentally spilt on the floor resulting him to accidentally fell on Sasuke's lap.
----------------Kissy Kissy Plan no.2 Emergency meeting inside Sasuke's head----------------
Sasuke#1: Naruto's on my lap, what should we do?
Sasuke#2: Ravish him!
Agree: 175
Disagree: 10
Neutral: 15
Sasuke#1-200: Ravish him!
----------------End of Kissy Kissy Plan no.2 Emergency meeting inside Sasuke's head----------------
Naruto tried to move away but couldn't. He looked behind him and saw Sasuke arms around his waist.
"Um… Sasuke, you could let go now." Naruto said nervously seeing something in Sasuke's eyes he have never seen before
"Don't wanna." That said, Sasuke placed his hand on Naruto's chin and pulled him down on a deep kiss. At first Naruto was struggling and wiggling to escape from Sasuke's grip but sooner realized how nice Sasuke's lips felt.
He slowly and carefully reached for Sasuke. One hand was buried on Sasuke's jet black hair while the other one was on the back of the brunette's neck. Naruto responded to Sasuke's kiss.
Sensing that Naruto stopped fighting against him, he loosen his grip on the blonde's waist but tightened his hold on the smaller boy's head as he deepened the kiss. His lips greedily moved against Naruto's. He licked the other boy's lips begging for entrance and the whiskered boy gave him what he wanted. His hot tongue ventured inside his crush's mouth. The place he never thought he'll ever reach. Tracing Naruto's teeth with his tongue he tightened his hold on the smaller figure again.
Naruto felt Sasuke was become a little nervous so he made a move to encourage his partner to go further. He met Sasuke's tongue with his own and wrapped it on the other's. Sasuke was quite surprised by the sudden aggressiveness of Naruto. But he's happy about it.
The stoic boy lifted Naruto a little to lay him down on the sofa. Sooner he moved on top of his friend. Sasuke wanted to ask Naruto if he's sure about it but before he could even speak, Naruto placed a hand on his lips and smiled at him and whispered
"Go on." Sasuke tenderly touched Naruto's hand and placed it on his face
"I won't stop once I begin." he was expecting Naruto to stand and push him away but all he felt was a tug at his shirt. He looked down and saw the blonde's hand pulling his shirt up. He smiled a little before pulling his shirt completely and tossing it somewhere in the room. When he looked back he saw Naruto blushing.
"What is it?" he asked quietly. The blue eyed boy touched the pale boy's bare chest
"Let's go. Make me feel good." He said while smiling. Sasuke smirked and nodded
He went down and pressed his lips on Naruto's then began attacking Naruto's neck. He kissed the younger boy's face down to his neck. He continued kissing while hearing Naruto's moan silently. The Uchiha licked at the other boy's lower neck and bit it, marking Naruto Uzumaki as his own from now on.
to be continued...
Hige: keep me inspired,,, leave me reviews... thanks for reading! please do tune in for the next chapter! review please!
