A/N. Bam! Chapter 3. I hope everyone likes it!
There will be some OOC moments in this. But, I kinda tend to do that, I hope it's not too bothersome. I try my best to write as 'in-character' as possible, but sometimes you want to add in something that would fit the moment, but not the character, so once again I apologize as I know it can be a tad annoying at times... Sorry for my rambling, while I'm at it... I really should shut up now... Here's the next chapter!
"Will proposed." said Tessa softly. Cecily's mouth was agape as she stared at the brunette in absolute excitement.
"Finally!" Cecily exclaimed. Tessa looked at her confused.
"What do you mean?" Tessa asked, Cecily stopped her little mental celebration.
"Well, he's been wanting to ask you for awhile, and, well, he never really knew when would be a good time." Cecily shrugged. Tessa looked back down. "You did say yes, right?" Cecily asked, growing worried at Tessa's lack of response.
"More or less." Tessa admitted. "When he asked me, I said yes. We were on our way to tell the others, and I realized, I couldn't" Tessa looked remorseful as Cecily's smile faded.
"Why not?" she asked, curious.
"Jem" Tessa's voice broke and her tears picked up. Cecily felt bad for bringing it up, but she knew it was a topic that Tessa would need to face sooner or later.
Will stood outside Tessa's room, no way would he leave her. After awhile, he could hear the girls talking, he could swear he even heard Tessa laugh. He felt a longing to be inside with the two most important girls in his life, but knew he shouldn't. he listened to them talk, then heard one word no one ever dared to say anymore. Jem. And it was followed by a straggled intake of breath. It hit him then, that's why she turned me down. He reminisced painfully about his parabatai and Tessa, he knew they were to be married, but he also knew, Jem came to break his last ties with them long ago. He knew, Jem was no longer his parabatai, he remembered the pain in his chest when their bond bled, when Jem had joined the brotherhood.
He was broken out of his thoughts by the door opening, Cecily walked right into him. "What were you doing out here?" she asked.
"I couldn't leave her." Will confessed. His sister shut the door behind herself and sighed.
"I'm glad you didn't. She needs you. More than ever, right now. I can't fix this." Cecily admitted, stepping to the side, "how much did you hear?" she asked before walking off.
"The last thing I heard was... his name." said Will, refusing to speak the word aloud. It was more out of respect than anything else how they rarely spoke Jem's name. The only exeptions were the two times Jem had shown up. Calling him 'Brother Zachariah' just wasn't right, it wasn't him.
"Good luck." said Cecily, as she walked down the halls. Will drew in a deep breath, and opened the door. He saw Tessa sitting at her windowsill, holding her angel necklace, no, it wasn't her angel she was holding, it was Jem's jade necklace. And she was holding it, with tears slowly trickling down her face, taking deep breaths, trying to clam herself.
"Tess?" said Will, softly from the doorframe. Tessa glanced over her shoulder, and took another deep breath. He began walking over to her, as she shut her eyes, looking away from him. "Tessa, please, please, please talk to me." Will pleaded.
"This isn't right." Tessa's voice was raw, and weak. She looked up at Will, who was looming over her. "This isn't how it's supposed to be." She looked back to the window.
"I know it's hard Tessa. I know. But you have to try to move away from what's hurting you."
"I can't." Tessa's eyes welled up with more tears. "I don't want to forget him."
"Moving on isn't about forgetting. It's about letting go of what's hurting, it's letting the pain go." Will sat beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, she gratefully leaned into him.
"How did you?" she asked, staring blankly at the floor.
"I stopped thinking about how we never see him. Now, I think for the future, and remember. I remember all of our memories, when I first met him, the parabatai rituals, feeding the cannibalistic ducks in Hyde Park, I remember all the good memories, and even the bad ones sometimes. But I don't think of how it is now, how bad it seems. I hope for one day where a cure will be found, and maybe we can all be re-united again." He ran his hand up and down her arm as he spoke. "Or at least one day the two of you can be together once again." Will added, feeling a sting in the backs of his eyes, but would not let a tear slip.
"I've always been told not to dwell in the past." Tessa said, emotionlessly.
"It's okay to go back sometimes. It's okay to think back on what you miss, but the only thing I can warn you is, don't let those memories affect how you live now." Will looked down at her, her tears were slowing, and her breathing was leveling. It was clear that she was doing her best to calm down, it was a bit embarrassing to have shed as many tears as she had. She nodded, taking one more deep breath, and lifted her hands, wiping her eyes with the heels of her hands. Will pecked her cheek, and smiled sadly down at her. "Are you feeling better?" he asked, concern lacing his voice. Tessa tried to smile up at him.
"I'm so sorry, Will." Tessa said, her hands in her lap, and eyes darting between them and the floor.
"What are you sorry for Tess? You have done nothing wrong. It is I, who had wronged you." Just as Tessa was about to protest, Will kept going, "I asked you a question, one that has been eating at my mind since I met you, since I realized I was still capable of love. But I ruined it by asking at the worst time, at a time that would seem like I was only anticipating Jem to-" He was abruptly cut off by Tessa pressing her lips to his. When she pulled back, Will could see she was smiling, it looked sincere, though it was weak, it was not forced. "I take that all is well between us now?" Will grinned, looking back at Tessa, who nodded.
"I forgive you, if you forgive me." Tessa said, certainly.
"All is forgiven. All the faults I have caused to you, I know will be forgiven. I know because when I look into your eyes, I no longer fear what I will see, for now it is I, who is free." Will stated, Tessa raised her eyebrows in amazement.
"When'd you come up with that?" asked Tessa. Will simply shrugged.
"Just now." admitted Will. Tessa smiled again, leaning closer into Will. He sighed, "I hate to be a bother, but it is exactly what is going to happen in a few moments. Cecily will burst through these doors in... give it roughly seven seconds."
"How do you assume that." Tessa asked, doubtful that he'd be right.
"I just know." And it was then, Cecily opened the doors wide, looking in at them. "I told you." Will said casually. Tessa stood up, and Will watched as Cecily practically jumped at Tessa, throwing her arms around the older girl. "What's all this?" Will asked, blatantly confused.
"To be honest, I'm not quite sure." Tessa said, still trapped by the younger girl's arms. Cecily let go, smiling up at Tessa.
"I'm just hugging my new sister." she beamed. Tessa laughed nervously, and Will looked to the floor, both realizing they'd never really confirmed their plans of marriage. Cecily's face fell. "You are getting married, right?" Tessa looked to Will, Will -being who he was, already knew exactly what he wanted to do. He took two long strides over to her, grabbing her hands in his and kneeling down infront of her, looking lovingly into her eyes.
"Tess, I know we've already done this once and I hope to wish this will be the last time I ask you this question." Tessa let out a weak laugh. "And, I know this will be the last time I ever ask this question because, I know that there is no one else out there for me. There is only you, and you alone. If I couldn't have you, I would want nobody, for Tess, it is only you who can complete me." Will stopped, seeing as Tessa had more tears in her eyes; but he knew that this time, they were happy tears. "I know that this, once again, isn't the perfect proposal, but, we do have an audience this time." Will looked over to Cecily, who had her hands clamped over her mouth, as if trying to contain her smile and impending squeal.
"Will, this is already perfect. I have all I need in my life," Tessa glanced at Cecily before playfully adding, "and Cecily." Will chuckled and Cecily smiled, glad to be included, though knowing what Tessa meant it in the nicest way.
"Back to my point." Will began, locking eyes with Tessa again. "You have been with me, you still kept faith in me, even when I wished you didn't, you still stayed with me. From that I have learnt so much, and I will run away from you no longer. I will run to you, everyday. I will stay with you, if you will stay with me." Will took a steadying breath "I never had reason to run, but I did. I ran because I was afraid that this ridiculous imaginary curse was real, and I didn't want to lose anyone, I was already losing Jem, and I couldn't handle losing anyone else." Will kissed her hand, then asked the question. "Now, I finally ask you, will you do me the honour in marrying me?"
"Yes. And I'm sure this time." Tessa stated firmly. Will smiled brightly, and Cecily let out a squeal. Will looked over to his sister, who shrugged.
"It's just so romantic. I can't help it!" she exclaimed. Will stood up, pulling Tessa into his arms. Cecily, being the person she is, joined in. "I can't help it, alright?" Will scoffed, rolling his eyes as he embraced his sister and fiancée.
"I never will understand women." he sighed, defeated. Cecily and Tessa giggled.
"You better learn to." Tessa joked. Will kissed gave her a quick kiss and grabbed her hand. "Are we going to tell them? I think I'm ready now." Tessa nodded, more to herself than to the others.
"Let's go, Mrs. Herondale." Will smiled, Tessa did too, gazing lovingly into his eyes before they began to make their way down he halls, closely followed by Cecily.
While they walked, Cecily was busy talking Tessa's ear off about the details of the wedding. Whether it was to be a mundane wedding, as they were both mostly raised as mundanes, or whether she wanted to have a full Shadowhunter wedding. Just the thought of getting married frightened Tessa, and she didn't want to have a huge extravagant wedding, but she kept nodding enthusiastically for Cecily's sake. But Will, he was quite obviously bothered by it and knew Tessa was growing nervous.
He squeezed her hand encouragingly as they walked in to the drawing room, surprised to see a silent brother in the room. Upon him turning, they realized it wasn't just anyone, it was Brother Zachariah, it was Jem.
A/N. I feel like all Tessa has done in this story is cry... Well, I guess she has a really emotional side now... Or she's pregnant... With the turbulence of this story, who knows? Oh yeah, I do. Hehehe... And, OMFG, JEM IS IN THE BUILDING! I just... I can't...
Next update is at 12+ (total) reviews. Yeah, I've become one of those people... but, I wish to know that people are reading this, so I can motivate myself to keep writing. It's not that I'm not enjoying writing this, I love this, I just want to know that other people read and like what I write. It helps me think and inspires me to write more.
