Authors note : Sorry for the delay, school had began and my time went away. However I've broken my leg and this has given me time to continue the spaziness you know and love.

Chapter 3: The Divine Wind

The gates of Konoha opened and what seemed as a parade had flooded through the gates. Confetti was thrown by 100 servants marching in standard formation wearing a whirlpool insignia. The servants were soon followed by massive carriage pulled by 12 horses . On top of the carriage were 20 beautiful women in cheerleader leader apparel singing

Kazemaru The Divine wind,

We all hail,

He shall prevail,

With out fail

- Lyrics by Kazemaru

(The words were too big for the cheerleaders to come up with by themselves).

" Is there a parade today?" said Hinata.

" Maybe someone important is visiting. " Said Sakura.

" Maybe a prince! " said Ino with hearts in her eyes.

The parade had stopped and out walked a tall, blond haired man wearing Royal blue and white robes, with sparkling blue eyes and not a blemish on him. It is needless to say the reaction of the three Konoha women who saw this was a massive flush of the face and two of them (more specifically Sakura and Ino) proceeded to have a bloody nose.

The man turned to them and said, " Hello there. My name is Uzumaki Kazemaru Lord of the second estate of the house of Maki and heir to the title of lord of the western lands of the Realm of Mountains. It is a pleasure to meet you but I must be going don't be strangers k?"

As he walked away he turned, winked and blew three kisses. These kisses caused the three konoha kinouchi's to faint from the sheer level of, well for lack of a better word prettiness they had just been witness to.

" Damn he was hot !!!" Said Sakura and Ino in unison.

" Naruto-Kun is so pretty when groomed" said Hinata, more flushed than anyone of the three.

"What are you retarded? Naruto couldn't look like that even with plastic surgery" Screamed Sakura.

" Naruto can be handsome too!!!!! Oragh!" Said inner Hinata.

Meanwhile Shizune just came out of her bath running to inform the Hokage of the occurrence of just a few moments ago. Her hair still dripping wet from her bath (although she is fully dressed you filthy pervs) causes a puddle which she slipped on as she entered the Hokage's office. Shizune slid into Tsunade or rather in to Tsunade's….

" Shizune I had no idea, ewww Lesbian. Where did I put that crucifix, it kills your kind right" Screamed Tsunade throwing Shizune out of her breasts and across the room.

"First of all Tsunade -sama , you can't kill lesbians with crucifix's that's vampires, boyfriends are what ward and kill lesbians because they melt. Secondly don't flatter yourself even if I was, which I'm not why would I go after some fifty something old hag like yourself." Screamed Shizune for the first time in her life.

"What did you say? " Said Tsunade with her anger building.

" Wait Tsunade -sama, I have something to say. There is a very important person who held there own parade in the middle of the village today"

" What? " yelled Tsunade running now to try and find this person who for all they now is a very influential client.

Kazemaru, now walking down the streets of Konoha . Practicing what he calls the "Sway effect" on all the local women of the village was approached by Kiba.

" what's up Naruto? Hey what's with the dress?" asked Kiba unaware of whom he was speaking

" What?!, this is not a dress it is an imperial robe, and who is this Uzumaki Naruto for I Uzumaki Kazemaru shall slay him for these multiple offences "

" Christ , your loud " Said Attendant now holding her head with a massive migraine.

" Attendant, please do not insult your Kazemaru-sama when he is speaking." Said Kazemaur condescendingly.

" That's it , I'm leaving. Your pompous ass can watch it self from now on. " Screamed attendant turning her back and disappearing in a puff of smoke.

"Nooooooooooooooo! Look what you've done fur ball, you made attendant leave. " Said Kazemaru grabbing Kiba.

" But I didn't do anything."

" You're right ill-bred mongrel, the doesn't lie with you or your mutt like upbringing but with Uzumaki Naruto, my nemesis."

" Hey I understand you guys look alike but that is no reason to fight Naruto, and what's with all the dog puns? I should kick your ass."

" It is the ultimate reason, there can only be one with this beautiful face"

" huh?"

" I'm off." Said Kazemaru disappearing like a cheesy villain.

Meanwhile at the ramen shop.

" More Maiso please ?" Screamed Naruto.

" Coming right up. " said Akane

" More Maiso over here too." Screamed a woman who surprisingly could eat as much ramen as Naruto.

Naruto looked over and saw the same amount of emptied bowls (of course only now realizing he had nowhere near the amount of money to pay for what he ate). Despite the amount of Ramen she crammed in her mouth she still looked like a bombshell babe, and as Naruto was gawking at this beautiful vision of a ramen customer a piece of paper was slammed before him.

" Huh?" uttered Naruto

" Your bill Naruto-kun." Said Akane.

" I'll pay for my admirer." Said The beautiful woman.

" Thanks, I'm.."

" Naruto Uzumaki, I know. Dear god you look just like that asshole I work for."

" Uh what? Who are you? How do you know who I am?"

" How rude of me, my name is Shinobu. I know your name because the asshole I work for came here to kill you."

" WHAT?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Whhhhhy ? "

" Because his last name is Uzumaki as well and we were in the land of waves and your name was on the "Great Uzumaki Bridge" and because his ego is as fragile as a newborn he wants to kill you."

"That makes no sense. But more importantly Tazuna named the bridge after me! Tazuna named the bridge after me, Tazuna named the bridge after me." Said Naruto doing a happy dance.

" Are all Uzumaki's retarded? Well this one is definitely nicer. I got it , I know how I'll get that asshole back for all these years of calling me attendant. I'll date this asshole and force Kazemaru to have to cohabitate with him. " thought Shinobu .

"Hey wait a second how can I be sure you're not trying to kil me too?"

" Because if I was you'd already be dead. Naruto do you mind if I call you Naru-chan? " asked shinobu while playing with her hair.

" uh, umm sure." said Naruto blushing a red deeper than Kyuubi Chakra .

" Let's go somewhere fun Naru-chan." Said Shinobu dragging off the Flushed Konoha shinobi.

To be continued