Disclaimer: Still don't own anything, but I'll let you know if I ever do.

A/N: This time a Janeway POV set during 'Night'.


Life is getting harder day by day

And I don't know what to do what to say

And my mind is growing weak with every step I take

It's uncontrollable now they think I'm fake yeah

Coz I'm not alone, no, no, no.

- 'Not Alone' by Danny Jones/McFly

Janeway sat stiffly in her arm chair, looking out the viewport and into the pitch blackness outside. There were no stars, no planets or nebulas...just an inky blackness. The darkness had long since leaked onto the ship and made it's way into every aspect of her life.

The view of space outside Voyager was now a reflection of what she was like on the inside. No stars to shine through the inherit darkness of space...just like there was no longer any inner light to pierce through her own abyss. The rays of hope were diminishing with each passing day that she woke up to the silence of space. She was as empty as the cold space surrounding her ship.

While her soul withered away, any specks of light slowly being overpowered by the continuous bleakness, her mind continued to work. Too bad it wasn't working the way she wanted it to. The guilt, sorrow, desperation, and all the other kinds of disabling emotions she'd spent years burying where now coming to the surface. And, of course, her mind was latching onto them, forcing her to think of all the things she'd never allowed herself to dwell on.

It was an odd sensation really. While she grew more tired day by day, both physically and emotionally, her overactive mind kept replaying the worst moments of her life. And without any distractions the guilt was slowly eating away at her while one thing became drastically clear...she was alone. Completely and utterly alone in the darkness of a starless space.

Just as she stood to approach her viewport she heard the door chime ringing through the silent quarters. She barely registered when she called the person in, but the familiar presence now in the room didn't surprise her. And neither did his not-so-subtle attempts to draw her out of her quarters.

Normally she might have relented when he gave her that concerned look, but this time it only made her angrier because she knew she didn't deserve his worry. No, it was better to just stay in her quarters, away from the crew, so she didn't cause them anymore unnecessary pain. She'd already caused them enough of that to last a lifetime.

"Dismissed." She finally ordered firmly and she didn't bother to turn and watch Chakotay leave.