The ride to New York had been nightmarish. Bella's screams were terrifying. I couldn't possibly compare my pain to hers but it was pure hell not being able to ease her pain.

I hadn't seen my family in over a year and, despite the circumstances, it was good to see them again.

Esme was, of course, thrilled to have the family together again, especially with the hope that Bella would join us.

They were all very sure that Bella would be a part of our family, but I didn't dare get my hopes up. After everything that had happened, I deserved her hatred. I had no right to expect that she would still love me when she woke up.

It was only a couple of hours until Alice predicted she would awaken and everyone was anxious and excited. Even Rosalie was grateful after I explained to everyone what Bella had been doing for the past three years.

I sat in a chair next to the bed where Bella lay. She was quiet again and probably would be until she woke up.

There was a good chance she would hear me if I spoke, but there was so much I wanted to say, I had no clue where to begin.

Mostly, I just wanted to apologize, over and over again until she would finally get sick of hearing it. She would never know just how sorry I was. I would never forgive myself and I wouldn't blame her if she didn't either.

Alice came in, stood by my chair and smiled down at Bella. "Isn't she dazzling, Edward? She's perfect!"

Yes, she was perfect and I loved her with every cell of my being. If she rejected me… I just didn't know what I would do.

"Would you please stop worrying? She never stopped loving you just like you never stopped loving her. Honestly, I'm shocked you could stay away from her for so long. You know she was going to die soon anyway, right? In fact, I'd say you found her in the nick of time."

I didn't look at her as I replied, I could only look at Bella. "Yes, I tasted it in her blood. I knew she wasn't healthy when I first saw her, but I didn't realize she was dying. I killed her you know."

"Edward, don't. You saved her."

I turned to glare at her. "I drove her to this! She was depressed, suicidal, and it was all because of me!"

I looked down at my hands, crying tears that would never flow. "She was doomed from the moment I saw her. She was as good as dead the second she set foot on that campus. Why, Alice? What had she done to deserve that? What could have possibly happened that marked her for death that way?"

I almost choked on my words, I could hardly breathe. Alice knelt next to me, took my hands and looked me straight in the eye.

"Did you ever think maybe you've been fighting fate? Isn't it possible that she was meant to be with us? You saw the vision as clearly as I did. As cheesy as it might sound, she's your soul mate, Edward. You know it as well as the rest of us do. Maybe if you hadn't fought so hard, everything would have been fine."

"She could have been changed after graduation, you would have gotten married, you wouldn't still be the oldest living virgin in the history of the world…"

She was trying to lighten the mood, but it only served to remind me of how Bella had lost her virginity and I sobbed even harder.

I heard the door open and I immediately started to feel better. Of course, it was Jasper. I appreciated his help. I was able to speak again, thanks to his influence.

"You know, she told me that once, that I was fighting fate trying to keep her alive. She was joking at the time, but I suppose she was right. If I hadn't been so damn stubborn…"

I turned back to Bella and took her hand in mine. "Do you hear that, Bella? I was wrong, you were right all along. I'm such a fool, a stubborn, foolish old man. If I had just listened to you… I thought I was so smart, but I'm the biggest fool to ever live. I made your life hell trying to do what I thought was best. I'm so sorry, so, so sorry, Bella!"

I started to sob again and I heard Jasper whisper to Alice, "I'm sorry, baby, I can't help him anymore. It's too much." Then he left the room.

Alice turned to me. I could hear it in her thoughts; she was tired of my wallowing in self-pity, fed up with my attitude and she was about to lay into me, and I would take it. I deserved it. I wished she would do more to make me suffer.

"Listen to me Edward Anthony, you buck up, right now! I know you're sorry, she knows you're sorry, the whole damn country knows you're sorry! She needs you now! You can't change the past, so stop it! She'll be awake in an hour and eleven minutes, so it's time to put your big boy pants on and be the man she needs you to be!"

"She loves you, and even if she hates you for a while, that's okay, too. You have an eternity to try to get her to change her mind. She's here with us now, where she belongs."

"Do not make us all miserable with your brooding! Do you understand me? This is a happy day for the rest of us, so jump on the bandwagon or leave!"

She turned away from me and went to the opposite side of the bed and started talking to Bella. "Bella, you're so beautiful! I can't wait to see your reaction to your reflection! I missed you so much!"

"Oh, and I will take you shopping, eventually, so don't even try to argue. We're moving to Maine after the first of the year. You'll love it! I tried to talk Carlisle into somewhere in Europe, but apparently they're having a bit of a black bear problem in that particular area, so maybe you'll like it there…"

Alice kept on talking; about bears, snow, shopping… she was trying to keep Bella calm as she slowly came into consciousness. It was what I should have been doing. Despite Alice's earlier tongue-lashing, however, I was still so worried that Bella would hate me.

The hour passed slowly and we had already decided that everyone in the room might be too overwhelming when she first awoke, so it would be me, Alice and Carlisle.

Carlisle had jokingly promised that if Bella tried to kill me when she came around that he and Alice could hold her while I escaped. I could tell from his thoughts, though, that he did consider it a possibility.

It was just the four of us and Alice continued to babble to Bella. I sat there wringing my hands, looking back and forth between Bella and the clock on the wall.

Only three more minutes remained. I started to feel nauseous. If I had had anything in my stomach, I was sure it would be on the floor now.

What would I say when she woke up? Maybe I should tell her one last time that I loved her before she could retaliate. I would first have to interrupt Alice.

"Alice, can I talk to her?" She stopped abruptly and smiled at me.

"Took you long enough. Sure, you have seventy-two seconds." She backed away from the bed, but stayed close by.

"Bella… baby… I just wanted to tell you one more time, before you wake up and kick my ass, that I love you. I hope you believe me and even if it's too late for us to be together because of my stupidity, that I'll always love you. Even if it's from afar, I'll never stop loving you. I'll understand if you hate me, but I love you."

Her eyelids started to flutter and I could no longer speak. I held my breath as she slowly opened her eyes. I backed away a step, partly so I wouldn't startle her and partly because I was genuinely afraid of what she would do.

I knew her eyes would be red, but it was still shocking to see. She looked up at me with her bright red eyes and in an instant she was out of bed, backed up to the wall, and in a defensive crouch. I had expected this and almost laughed out loud that she finally did something I expected.

"Bella… love… it's okay, you're safe. No one's going to hurt you." She glanced around the room, first taking note of me, Alice, then Carlisle. She seemed to consider us for a moment then stood up.

"Where…" her voice was beautiful, angelic, and it seemed to have surprised her. I couldn't help but smile. "Where am I? Where are we?"

Nobody moved toward her, but we all relaxed a little. "You're in our house on Long Island. In New York. How are you feeling?"

No sooner had he finished his sentence than she was standing in front of me. "You… you bit me."

I couldn't tell by her tone if she was mad or not, so I backed up a step as I answered. "Yes. I did." I didn't know if apologizing was the right thing to do.

She closed the space between us. "I was dying… I was supposed to die." I backed up again. I definitely had the feeling she was about to hit me.

"I couldn't let you die, I love you." I hoped speaking to her quietly would help her stay calm. Once again, she took a step toward me.

"You saved me." Well, that was better. Maybe she wouldn't be mad after all.

As I finished that very thought, I felt the force of a cannonball hit me in the face and I hit the wall that had just been seven feet behind me.

The plaster shattered and the wood splintered, and I sat on my ass in the dust, bewildered and confused. Then I heard her shriek.

"That's for calling me a fucking whore! That's for the living hell you put me through! You stupid, self-righteous asshole!" Her screaming shook the walls and I jumped back up, ready to defend myself.

Carlisle and Alice were already standing on either side of Bella, holding her arms when everyone in the house came running through the door. It caught Bella off guard and she poised to strike again.

Everyone stood still, assessing the situation, including Bella. Leave it to Emmett to break the silence.

"Damn girl! You are bad-ass! Pay up, Jaz!" I couldn't believe Em bet against me! He won, though, so I couldn't be too mad with him.

Thanks to Jasper, everyone stayed calm, Bella included. I had a feeling those two might be attached at the hip for a while if she was going to be mad at me.

Bella relaxed her stance and so did Carlisle and Alice, but they didn't leave her side. "Oh, God, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I broke your house. I didn't mean to."

"It's alright, Bella. It was an accident." Carlisle spoke to her as if he were consoling a small child.

I paid careful attention to the thoughts around me.

-Carlisle thought: "You've got your hands full with this one, son."

- Esme thought: "I'm sure you can fix my wall in no time."

-Alice thought: "We're going to be best friends again!"

-Rosalie thought: "Serves him right, fucking jerk."

-Emmett thought: "She is so gonna kick your ass!"

-Jasper thought: "I'll do my best to keep her calm, but it might not be easy."

If only I knew what Bella was thinking! Carlisle spoke to her again. "Are you okay? Do you want Edward to leave?"

What? Me? Leave? I was not leaving! "No, no. I'm okay now. I promise not to hit him again."

"You gonna kick him next time? We should take this outside, you don't wanna destroy the house!" Rosalie smacked Emmett in the shoulder and Jasper began to laugh. Surprisingly, Bella did too.

"No, I promise not to hurt him, or anyone else. I'll be good now." She began to slowly walk toward me. She looked like she was trying not to spook me. It was kind of funny, but I wouldn't dare laugh right now, she might knock my jaw off.

"Edward… I won't do it again." She kept moving toward me and everyone let me know they'd help me if need be. "You deserved that slap, though. I won't apologize for that." Rosalie suddenly had a whole new respect for Bella.

"Yes, I did. What you said is true, I did deserve it. I deserve more. I'll never be able to make it up to you, I'll never be able to say I'm sorry enough times, but I swear to you, I'll spend the rest of my days trying. If you don't want…"

Her hand was suddenly covering my mouth. "That's enough. I'm already tired of hearing it. I know you're sorry. The whole damn country knows you're sorry." She smiled toward Alice.

"I could never really hate you. I love you. Just, don't do anything else for my own good again. Okay?"

She removed her hand and I smiled. "I won't, I promise."