Everything was hitting Elsa at once, Anna knew about her curse, her parents have been gone three years to this day, and worst of all, by slamming that door in Anna's face she had ensured Anna would never forgive her. Serves you right, all you are is selfish. She sat there, unable to think straight. Why did you do that you idiot? Elsa felt like sinking into oblivion and never coming back, never having to feel anything ever again.

But she could not escape the image of Anna's face. The hurt it revealed when Elsa backed away. It was taunting her, and Elsa couldn't handle the pain, The ice grew around her in sharp, jagged forms, caging her in cold turmoil. Elsa stayed there for the next hours, shaking with anxiety. Her heart was moaning for this to be gone, and for her not to care, but she simply had to care.

Anna's beautiful face, her luscious curves, and her big, teal eyes. Soft lips, shining hair, and smooth skin. What are you thinking about, Elsa? She is your sister. She tried with no avail to push these thoughts about Anna out of her head, but at least they were distracting her from the pain.

"No, you can't, well... can you? What is going on?" Elsa found herself grunting to herself.

She thought of the warm touch of her little sister's hand, the only human contact she has had in years. She was confused. She wanted to just hold Anna in her arms, or at the very least hold her hand. She wanted that warmth around her, but all she found was ice.

It isn't your fault if you want to be more than her sister, she is the only one you've communicated with for years. Elsa once again began to imagine Anna's soft, pink lips. How warm they must be, how she longed to feel them. You're sick, you just need to be her sister. That's all. But I can want more, right? At this thought Elsa fell into a drowsy state, but her feelings kept her up. She still had a buzz in her stomach, and her heart was still heavy. Sleep came with extreme difficulty, and she was still on the ground next to the door that she loathed so much.

Elsa's dreams were filled with strange concoctions of thoughts about Anna. All of which were pleasant, some of which were even pushing the boundary of sisterhood. The one that stuck out most to Elsa when she awoke was one where Anna snuck in the room and kissed Elsa on the lips. Anna's wet lips pressed up against Elsa's, warming the entirety of Elsa's body. The sensation was so intense that it brought Elsa straight out of her sleep. The sun had crept up and was beaming through the window directly in Elsa's face. Squinting to the light, the girl realized she was still on the ground. What is wrong with your head? Those dreams were disgusting, Elsa told herself. But it was no use, by now her yearning for seeing her younger sister and feeling her warmth was too strong. She had a small taste of it just hours before and she wanted to sink her teeth in for a bigger bite.

Before she knew it Elsa was standing up hand outstretched for the door handle. But then she hesitated, she felt her familiar shaky knees and butterflies. She didn't want to leave. But you want Anna, and she is out there. She tenderly pushed the handle down and the door open. The first place she looked was the ground where he lovely sister had been the previous night. Elsa didn't know why she was so disappointed when she found no one there. Why would she stay there after what you did?. Elsa lingered there for a little too long, scared to face the hallway, scared to face Anna. You have done this before, just do it.

Blood rushed violently to Elsa's head as she took her first step outside the room. Her legs froze, her heart pounded rapidly. For a short while she was frozen where she stood, and felt the ice coming back. She began to have a panic attack, but she caught herself.

"No, not now, don't feel."

She closed her eyes and focused on calming down before she froze the entire castle. The cold centered in her stomach and snaked its way through her body until it was at her fingertips.

"Conceal it, control it."

The chill of Elsa's curse slowly subsided as she stood there, but every step brought on the challenge yet again. With increasing unease she slowly made her way to Anna's room careful not to freeze anything.

Stopping just short of the door, Elsa nearly had another panic attack. She felt her face become hot and was suddenly very dizzy. Forcing herself to stay up, Elsa leaned on the door. As her head rush subdued itself to a fluttering heart Elsa pressed her ear on the door.

Her heart stopped as she heard quiet sobbing from the other side. Why couldn't you just help her? She is crying and it is your fault because you're too scared to let your secret out. Elsa felt useless and went to turn away, but was stopped short by her conscience. Just because you let her down before doesn't mean you have to again. At the she turned back around and held her hand up, but paused there. Her hand was shaking violently, disobeying her commands to knock on the door. You are going to see her, those perfect lips, those curves, and her sweet smile that you miss so dearly. Finally Elsa's hand was obedient for just one wrap on the door, but it was enough. Elsa's heart skipped what seemed like a thousand beats when she heard the voice coming back from the other side.

"Elsa, is that you?" The voice was trembling.

The older girl smiled a weak but true smile and nodded. She can't see you through the door, idiot. With a little trouble getting around the lump forming in her throat, Elsa choked out a weak "yeah."

"You didn't seem to care earlier, why try now?" The words hit Elsa like a spear in the heart. Ice overtook the floor where Elsa was standing. Ouch. Thoughts went through Elsa's head, telling her exactly what to say, what would fix it. I do care, I'm just scared. Anna, of course I care, let me in, we can get through this. Elsa longed for Anna's touch again, if just the squeeze of her sister's hand felt so good, what would holding her feel like?

"I'm sorry." was all Elsa managed to pipe up, despite her mind's protests. She felt the ice grow colder.

After what felt like an eternity but in a reality was only a short while Elsa heard movement in the room. So this is what you've been doing to her all these years. The rustling of the sheets stopped, and Elsa held her breath to get a better listen in the room. She heard soft footsteps approaching. Her heart was racing and her breathing became rapid and uneven as she choked on anticipation. Just then a click made itself known from the other side of the door. She unlocked it. Elsa stepped back, almost falling backwards as her legs began to give out. Ice started climbing the walls, Elsa fought with all her strength to stay upright. Do it, open it, Anna.

She did, the door opened just enough to reveal Anna's full face. Elsa couldn't help but stare at her freckles, her beautiful amber hair, which was admittedly messy right now. Anna's eyes were red and puffy from crying, but even so she was gorgeous. She must have been crying all night. She managed a half smile as she locked eyes with her little sister. Talk, she's waiting. Say anything. But nothing came out. Elsa began to feel like she was choking.

Then Anna broke she silence. Her lips created a stern line, and the words came out like icy knives stabbing Elsa a thousand times in the heart. "You never let me in before, why should I let you in now?"

"I-" but just as Elsa started Anna broke there eye contact by slamming and locking the door. So this is what it feels like. I guess I deserve this. Elsa's heart once again became a lead weight, and she collapsed to her knees then side. She lay down, curled up as cold, wet tears streamed down her face. She couldn't get her head straight, she just wanted to float away and never come back. The ice once again found its way into caging Elsa like an animal.