Chapter 3
Hank arrived back at the race track, just as the race was about to stop. He saw his pit crew dressed in orange Dale's Dead Bug uniforms. They went up to greet Hank.
"Hey, Hank, where were you?" Dale asked.
"I went to the house for a moment to think things over. Phil's mower is much faster than mine, so I probably won't win. But…I just decided to race anyhow. What good is a race if you don't have fun?" Hank said. He then got on his mower, which was next to Phil's.
"Ready to race?" Phil asked, revving his engine. His diesel engine roared loudly. Hank nodded, but he didn't say anything. He was very intimidated by Phil's powerful tractor. He sure wish that he could get the trophy even though Phil's mower was faster. Only time would tell.
"On your marks…get set…go!" bellowed the flag man. At that moment, all the tractors took off. Most only managed to get up to 15 miles per hour. The real race was between Phil's tractor and Hank's tractor. Phil and Hank had their tractors set for full speed, and as Hank expected, Phil's tractor whooshed right by. Hank knew there had to be something else to make his tractor go faster. Without thinking, Hank flipped the hood off his tractor while he was driving, and it crash landed in the middle of the track. The drivers behind him skidded, and some crashed into each other. Hank smiled. His tractor was going faster but only by about 5 miles per hour. He needed another 5 miles per hour to at least stay at equal speed with Phil. Hank realized that he needed perhaps 10 miles per hour more to beat Phil.
Meanwhile, Phil, feeling happy and proud, looked at the dashboard of his tractor and realized that it was low on diesel. He pulled over and beckoned to Tyler and Joe. His two friends rushed over. "What is it, Phil?" Tyler asked.
"My tractor needs diesel, hurry up!" Phil said, seeing how the other racers were getting ahead of him. Tyler and Joe got a barrel of diesel fuel and tried lugging it toward the tractor. Unfortunately, even with their combined strength, they could hardly move the barrel. Phil, being impatient, decided to do it himself. "For goodness sakes, just let me do it," he said as he got off the tractor and took the barrel of diesel from Tyler and Joe. Suddenly, just as he got by the tractor, Phil tripped on a rock, and he dropped the barrel of diesel fuel. The barrel cracked open, and the diesel fuel seeped out. They got near the engine, which had nearly burned all the diesel fuel left in the tank. Suddenly, the tractor exploded. Burning metal parts flew everywhere, and a big oil fire started right next to Phil. Phil glared at Tyler and Joe. "Nice going, guys!" he snapped. He then gave the two a little shove.
"You can't push us, we're your pit crew!" Tyler said as Joe and he shoved Phil back. The three then got involved in a big fight, punching, slapping, and kicking each other all over the place. They wandered away from the burning tractor and the race track. Hank saw the whole thing. He couldn't stop laughing.
"Well, I'll be darned! I guess I'll win this race after all!" Hank kept his eyes on the track, but he also watched Phil, Tyler, and Joe beating the slop out of each other. He laughed at how they fought over something so ridiculous as a simple little lawn mower race.
Not long afterward, Hank was declared the winner of the race! He was awarded the trophy, and his photograph was taken with Dale, Bill, and Boomhauer. Hank was proud of his picture and trophy, so he put them up on the bookshelf where everyone could see it. Hank looked closely at the picture and smiled. In the background, he saw Phil, Tyler, and Joe fighting. He smiled, laughed, and looked at his beautiful trophy.
"Wow, Dad, you won!" Bobby exclaimed. "That trophy sure looks beautiful. I'm glad you won the race this time."
Hank laughed. "Me too, son."
The End
