No Mistake
Chapter 3
I did not see much of Eomer the next day, and the day after that the funeral procession departed Minas Tirith for Edoras. There was a protocol to your placement in the procession, and my brothers and I were near the front, but behind the two Kings, the Queen of Gondor and my father. My brothers kept me amused for the early part of the journey, pointing out things of interest along our path. Though they had never been to Rohan before, we were seeing sights that they had seen before elsewhere, but that I had not.
The farther we got from Minas Tirith, the more rugged the country became and I was enjoying its wild beauty. Traveling at the foot of the White Mountains somewhat eased the heat of the summer days. But after a week on the road, the trip was becoming tiresome and I ached to explore the Druadan Forest we were passing. One day, while my brothers were riding with the Swan Knights, I found myself edging off in that direction. Surely a closer look would do no harm as long as I did not lose sight of the company.
My attention was so riveted on the forest that I did not immediately notice the sound of horses' hooves coming in my direction. When I looked up, I saw Eomer riding toward me, flanked at some distance by two Riders of the Mark. At first I could not imagine why he would be coming to join me, but then it dawned on me and I flushed red with embarrassment. As he pulled to a stop in front of me, I ducked my head, "My lord."
He simply sat there for a few moments, waiting me out, until I finally looked up and saw the amused grin on his face. "If my lady wishes to speak with me alone, there are less dangerous, or noticeable, ways of accomplishing it!"
"Tell me the guards did not send you to retrieve me," I said, closing my eyes.
"I fear I cannot do so. They were not quite sure how to proceed and sought my counsel in the matter. It is so much more difficult dealing with an errant noblewoman than someone of less vaunted birth."
Against my will, I smiled. "Well, it is good to talk to you. I have missed our conversations," I admitted.
"I, too. Our families seem to have given up on us and now we have no one trying to and bring us together."
"I doubt that very much. They are just temporarily biding their time. Perhaps they do not feel a funeral march is the proper place for courting."
"Perhaps not, though, to tell you the truth, I think my Uncle might actually find it amusing!"
I returned his smile as he added, "However, if we are to keep them in the dark about our plans, I think we need to get you back to the group – where I trust you will stay, from now on?"
I nodded sheepishly. "I did not mean to stray. But all of this is so new, I just wanted to go exploring. It seemed like it would be safe enough if I kept the group in sight."
The smile slipped from his face. "In truth, there are more dangers than you know lurking about. It is beautiful, yes, and I wish you could explore, but it truly is not safe to do so. I would not see you harmed."
I straightened in my saddle. "Very well. I shall do as the King orders and be a good girl henceforth." He caught the twinkle in my eye, and gave me one last grin before adopting a neutral expression as we turned to ride back toward his escort, and then return to the procession. My father was looking annoyed but said nothing. I knew he would wait until we were alone to impress upon me the inappropriateness of my actions.
Surprisingly, Eomer may have suspected as much, for he turned to me and formally asked, "Lady Lothiriel, I have seen little of you and your brothers on this trip. Would your family care to join me for supper this evening?"
I glanced at Father, who nodded imperceptibly to encourage my positive response. Feigning slight reluctance, I answered, "We would be honored to do so, my lord. Thank you." He nodded and I returned to my usual placement in the cortege.
I was not expecting to see Eowyn pull her horse alongside mine a few moments later. "I hope my brother did not upset you," she told me. "When he is leading a group such as this he can be very picky about everyone's safety. I do not truly think you were in any danger where you were riding."
I smiled at her and replied, "He was most kind about it – but firm. While he may know you are capable of protecting yourself, he does not know the same about me. I am sure it would have been an embarrassment to him for me to get hurt while in his safekeeping."
"Can you not defend yourself…at all?" Eowyn asked in wonder.
"I am passable with a bow; less so with a sword. I am not much threat to anyone other than small children or old women."
She broke out in laughter at that. "Well, then I shall have to teach you. We cannot have you wandering around unprotected."
We rode in silence for a short while and then she asked, "How are you faring on this trip?"
I shrugged. "I do not mind riding, but…well, this incessant walking is very tedious. Especially if I am not allowed to explore along the way. Perhaps I will beg a seat in one of the carriages for awhile and try to take a nap."
I think she might have considered joining me but for Faramir. This journey was affording them much time together and they seemed to find plenty to talk about. It was touching to look in their direction at times and see them holding hands as they rode along. She smiled and said she would see me at dinner, then rode back to join my cousin.
A few minutes later, I had turned my horse over to a servant and was settled in a carriage with three other noblewomen. I suspected most of the nobles making this trip to Rohan were doing so to endear themselves both to their own King, as well as the young King of Rohan. I had learned in my time spent with Eowyn that she had as little use for the lot of them as I did but, like me, she was forced to act pleasant when around them. It wasn't likely with their chatter that I would get a nap in, so I gazed out the window and tried not to listen to them.
To my surprise, they were trying to draw me into the conversation, and I soon discovered why. The topic had turned to the King of Rohan, and since I was the only one in the party who had actually met and spoken with him, they hoped to find out more about him. A spirit of devilry arose in me, and I welcomed the challenge.
"My lady, you have met Eomer King. Tell us what he is like. Is he charming, witty?"
I gave the matter some thought and then told them solemnly, "He can be charming, when it suits him, yes. I have not heard much wit from him in public, though perhaps in private it is so." I could picture Eomer overhearing my comments and laughing loudly, and that egged me on. "The manners of these horsemen seem much more coarse and unrefined than we are used to in Gondor's court. Indeed, the King himself often smells much like his horse."
The three were gaping at me wide-eyed, somewhat appalled by my comments, so I added, "But that has only been my experience with the man. Perhaps he is different with others. Surely he bathes off the scent of horse before he courts a woman..." I let my words trail off as I returned my attention to the landscape outside. Eomer was going to owe me for this – saving him from these silly fortune hunters. Still, if they were determined enough, I was sure my words would not put them off his trail for long. Perhaps I would find an opportunity at dinner to tell him what a good friend I had been to him!
The trio seemed to decide they did not want to hear more of what I had to say on the subject of Rohan's King and asked me nothing more. Gazing out the window, I caught a glimpse of Eomer, riding beside King Elessar. I began to wonder what he would be like if he were courting a woman.
Once again, I had been playing with words. Eomer was charming when it suited him - which seemed to be most of the time, from my perspective. Our public conversations had not lent themselves to wit, but certainly he was witty enough when we were alone. And in truth, he smelled like his horse only when he had just come from riding. The rest of the time he had a wonderful outdoorsy, masculine scent to him that was most appealing. I could not envision him courting any of my carriage companions, but I had little doubt the woman he did decide to court would find nothing wanting in him.
xxxxx
The afternoon droned tediously on. To make matters worse, we stopped for the night later than usual and it was mostly dark by the time the tents had been raised. My father wasted no time in seeking me out, no doubt to make certain I behaved myself at dinner with the King. He arrived at my tent while I was deciding what to wear. Though Eowyn and I could each have had a tent of our own, we had elected to share one. I saw little of her in the tent, however, as she spent most of her time with Faramir or her brother. She was gone when my father put in appearance.
As soon as I let him in, his tirade began, "Lothiriel, what has gotten into you? I suppose I am somewhat to blame for being too indulgent with you while you were growing up, but it is time you realized you are no longer a girl of fourteen. You are a woman of noble birth and nearly one-and-twenty years of age. When do you intend to start acting the part?"
By now I was angry. I did not like being taken to task as if I were an unruly child, and I did not truly think I had done anything so terribly wrong. "You mean when do I intend to act dull and boring, like the rest of the royal court? In truth, Father, I hope never to do so! I have done nothing scandalous! Ill-advised, perhaps, but I have committed no great crime!"
Father rubbed his forehead and tried to restrain himself. "Thiri, you must understand - the daughter of a prince cannot behave in such a frivolous manner. You give no thought to how your actions will be perceived by others. Perhaps they are not scandalous, but they are inappropriate. Indeed, I am amazed that Eomer King will still have anything to do with us after some of the things you have said to him! I insist you conduct yourself properly; tonight at supper and every other time you are in public."
"Very well, Father," I snapped, "if you wish me to bore the King to tears, I shall do my best to accommodate you!"
He threw his arms up in frustration and stormed from the tent, leaving me pacing the room with tears streaming down my face. I did not like arguing with my father, but in this matter, we would never see eye-to-eye.
xxxxx
Not long after my father left, Eowyn hurried in to change for dinner. At first she was too busy chattering about Faramir to notice my mood, and I kept my face averted from her while trying to dry my eyes. As I looked at my dresses, attempting to decide which to wear, Eowyn, thinking to be helpful, commented, "Why not wear that pale blue one? The one Eomer liked you in at breakfast?"
She had meant well, but that was truly the wrong thing to say just then. I stood gasping for air and seeking control. I tried not to let her see the effect of her words on me, but she would have to be blind to not see something was amiss. "Thiri? What is wrong? What did I say?"
I shook my head quickly in an effort to assure her it was not her fault, but found it difficult to speak. Finally I whispered, "It is nothing you did. I had an argument with my father before you came in and I am still upset by it." Whether she entirely believed me or not, she accepted my explanation and sat with an arm around me, trying to offer consolation. After a few minutes, I stiffened my back and rose.
"I must get ready. Father will be even angrier with me if I am late to supper." I moved to the wash bowl and cooled my face with the water, hoping the red would dissipate before I put in appearance in public. Methodically, I pulled on a dress - the pale blue one, in hopes it would lift my spirits - and then combed my hair neatly into a proper and ho-hum bun. Let me look as cheerless as I was expected to behave. Eowyn watched me out of the corner of her eye while dressing herself, but made no comment on my choices of attire and hairstyle. When we were both ready, we exited the tent together and moved toward the much larger tent of the King. Just before we reached it, Eowyn turned me to face her and looked intently into my lifeless eyes, and then pulled me into a hug. I think she couldn't find the words to express her support and so she tried to let her actions demonstrate for her. And I appreciated it very much.
Once inside the tent, Eowyn stayed close to my side rather than drifting off to join Faramir. The most formal situations called for a lady to extend her hand to a gentleman, who then was obliged to kiss it briefly. Whenever possible, I avoided this as I found it annoying to have would-be suitors slobbering on me and trying to hold onto my hand longer than they should. When King Elessar and his wife approached us, however, Eowyn extended her hand and I felt bound to do likewise.
Eomer came to greet us as well, and when he bent to kiss my hand, his eyes looked up and tried to catch mine. He seemed to be trying to tell me something with his glance, but I was too distracted to read it and he released my hand reluctantly. If he knew that the redness of my face was due to anything other than sun or exercise, he did not say so, and I hoped I had hidden the traces of my tears well enough so that no one would make comment at dinner. My brothers could be quite tactless in that regard.
Seating was not assigned and, while I was not paying attention, Eowyn managed to maneuver me so I was sitting between her and her brother. My father was giving me pointed looks; reminders of how he wanted me to behave tonight and I resolutely took my seat.
Throughout the meal, Eowyn made repeated attempts to draw me into a conversation with Eomer by talking to him across me. But aside from the expected polite responses, I refused to do more than the minimum that was expected of me. I found it offensive to perform like a trained animal in order to impress others, most of whom weren't worth knowing, regardless of their titles or station. To be fair, there was no one in my present company that I disliked or wished to offend, but I resented not being allowed to be myself with those I would wish to think of as friends. I did not know King Elessar or his wife very well, though I had met them on several occasions and had a good opinion of them both. Each was friendly and endearing, and they often dispensed with stiff formalities. I did not see why I could not do likewise.
I knew the real issue here - Eomer. I did not think my father was nearly so intent on the impression the King and Queen of Gondor might have of me as he was on what the King of Rohan would think. I wanted to scream at him that the King of Rohan liked me just fine the way I was, but that would require admitting our subterfuge, and then they would all think their matchmaking efforts had paid off, and it would turn our friendship into something it was not. And, frankly, I did not want that friendship tarnished. No, what Eomer and I had was private and secret, and I would do everything in my power to make it remain so. He had opened his heart to me a tiny bit, and I felt honored. In return, he had accepted me as I was, completely and nonjudgementally. I did not want to lose that, and I knew it would be impossible to maintain in the glare of the public eye.
And so I sat stiffly through the meal, and excused myself as soon as I could do so without upsetting my father. Normally, I would have preferred to go for a walk, but I knew the sentrys would not let me wander far and I wanted privacy. So I retreated to my tent, knowing that Eowyn wasn't likely to return for some time. Already she and Faramir had set a pattern of spending every waking moment together, and they made a point of stretching those waking moments as far as possible.
Not bothering to change out of my dress, I lay down on my cot and stared at the top of the tent, lost in my own self pity. I lay there for over an hour and the night had become chill, though I was reluctant to move and get a blanket. While I pondered the matter, there was a knock at the tent post, and I assumed it was my father, there to either apologize or chastize me more for my behavior at dinner.
Resolutely I rose and went to answer, and was astonished to find myself looking into Eomer's face. "May I come in?" he asked.
Caught off guard, I merely nodded and stepped aside. He strode in, coming to a stop near the center tent pole and turning to face me. For a moment we just looked at one another until finally I broke the silence, "Forgive me, but I am not good company tonight, my lord."
He took a step toward me. "The name is Eomer, remember? Are you alright?"
I turned away. "I had an argument with my father and I am out of sorts. Perhaps it would be better if we talked tomorrow. As I said, I am not good company right now."
"I have a confession to make."
I tried to ignore this statement, but I think he knew it would catch my interest. I resisted the urge to ask what it was, so he volunteered, "I overheard your argument with Imrahil. I was coming to see Eowyn when he arrived and I...overheard everything."
I let out a sigh. "Eomer..."
"No, let me finish. I feel as if I am partly to blame for your father's censure. I have encouraged your casual behavior, but he does not know that. I wanted to apologize."
"Eomer," I repeated, shaking my head, "it is not your fault. This is a very old argument. You are merely the current focal point. When I was younger, it was easier to bill and coo and play these court games, as I was expected to do. But as I have gotten older, I have tired of going to such great lengths to impress people I do not like in an effort to win some advantage by so doing. I do not care if they don't want me marrying their sons! I should rather marry a stable hand who accepted me for who I am, than a nobleman for whom I always had to wear a mask."
"It pains me to see you so unhappy," he told me softly. "Is there nothing I can do? If your father knew that I did not mind..."
"No! Don't you see - that will not convince him of what I am saying. Yes, he may allow me to be myself more, once he thinks I have won the heart of a king, but when we do not court and marry, he will just take it to mean you were scared off by my 'unseemly' conduct." I stamped my foot in frustration. "I am not explaining this to you very well. I am sorry. It is just...I do not want them to know about us, even if it might be helpful right now. I fear it would eventually destroy our friendship."
He caught me by the shoulders and turned me to face him. "No matter what happens, I will not let them destroy our friendship. It has come to mean a great deal to me, even in this short space of time. If you want to continue to keep our secret, then I will do so."
I could tell he was waiting for me to look up at him and finally I did, giving him a weak smile. Merriment sprang to his eyes and he whispered, "I like your dress - especially the full skirt!" I could not help myself; I collapsed against his chest in a fit of giggles.
"I am sorry I was so awful at dinner," I apologized. "You should have come and cheered me up before instead of after!"
He laughed and told me, "Well, I will accept your apology, on one condition."
"And what is that?"
"Please take your hair down out of that awful bun! It is most unattractive!"
Pulling the hairpins loose to free the hairstyle, I laughed. "You mock my show of rebellion? I thought it was quite clever!"
I smiled at him. "Thank you for being a good friend." As he returned the smile with a grin of his own, I added, "Oh, I almost forgot to tell you what a good friend I was to you today!"
He narrowed his eyes and took a seat on a chair. "Do I really want to hear this?"
"But of course!" I teased. "Three lovely young noblewomen engaged me in conversation, and since I was the only one of our party to have met you, they wanted me to tell them all about you - and so I gave them my truthful view of what you are like."
He let out a groan. "Allowing you to give anyone your 'truthful' version of anything about me is almost as dangerous as letting Eowyn sing my praises! I shall die unmarried with the two of you 'helping' me!" He rolled his eyes, and then sat forward in his chair. "Just exactly what 'truthful' things did you tell them, if I may ask?"
And so I related my earlier conversation in the carriage, with much further groaning on his part. When I finished he said, "Do me a favor; do not do me any favors! At least not until you ask me if I might be interested in the girl before you send her running into the hills!"
I walked over and laid a hand on his shoulder. "I assure you, if I had thought there was ANY chance you would ever be even slightly interested in any of those three, I would not have said a word other than praise about you."
We were startled just then, by a knock at the tent door. For a moment, I panicked. How would I explain his presence in my tent? Taking a deep breath, I called out, "Yes?"
"Thiri? May I come in?" It was my father. I glanced at Eomer who had risen from his seat.
I shrugged in acceptance of the situation and replied, "Of course, Father."
He was taken aback at the sight of Rohan's king. "Eomer? I did not expect to find you here."
Before Eomer could respond, I offered, "The King kindly noticed I was out of sorts at supper, and was afraid it might have been due to something he had done. I have assured him he is not to blame."
My father nodded in understanding. "No, Eomer, I fear the fault is mine. My daughter and I quarreled before supper. I should have reconciled with her before we ate so our mood would not affect others."
"Lady Lothiriel seems in better spirits now, my friend, so I will leave you two to talk. I am glad I was not the cause of her distress." He bowed and quickly exited the tent, and I steeled myself for what my father might say.
To my surprise, he simply laid a gentle hand on my arm. "Dearest Thiri, I am sorry if I was cross with you. I do mean well. This would be so much easier if your mother were still here. She would calm my temper and correct you in a more gentle manner than I. Forgive me?"
I rushed into his arms and hugged him tightly. "I love you, Father. I know you mean well, even if we do not agree on this. And I know it may not seem like it, but I do try to remain more formal with those who demand it. I have only been 'too casual' with those from whom I got some indication they did not mind, and in fact enjoyed my easy manner."
He nodded, realizing that to discuss it further might lead to another argument. So he kissed me on the forehead and said goodnight. As I changed into my nightgown and hung up the blue dress I had worn to supper, I started to chuckle. Wearing it had lifted my spirits! Well, after supper, anyway!
xxxxx
Four days later, I awoke before dawn with my stomach churning. I barely grabbed an empty water bucket before my stomach purged itself. The sound woke Eowyn, who hurried to my side, pulling my hair back out of the way. She wished to send immediately for the healer who accompanied our party, but I convinced her to wait at least until dawn, in hopes I would be better by then. But it was not so. Though the purging finally ceased, I ached all over and was generally miserable.
I heard Eowyn leave the tent and she returned a short time later with the healer. I was given an herbal drink to settle my stomach but little could be done other than wait out the illness. After the healer departed, Eowyn hurriedly went in search of her brother to make my condition known. When next I opened my eyes, Eomer, the King and Queen of Gondor, my father, Eowyn and Faramir were all standing over me. I groaned and shut my eyes again, missing the twitch of amusement around Eomer's mouth.
King Elessar knelt beside me and quietly asked, "My lady, you are unwell?"
I nodded, but told him, "The healer says we must wait it out. Do not be alarmed. It will pass."
Eomer spoke then, "Perhaps we should remain encamped here, then." The King and my father were agreeing with him, but I spoke up.
"My lords, I thank you for your concern, but do not let my illness delay us. If a carriage is made available that I may lie down in, I will be able to travel."
I saw the concern in Eomer's eyes and knew he was reluctant to go along with this, but King Elessar offered, "My carriage is the largest, and Arwen and I have used it little on this journey. Lothiriel may stay there while we travel and the healer can ride with her, if necessary."
My father gratefully accepted on my behalf, and so Eomer went along with the decision. "Very well, then. We will depart as scheduled."
The usual activities began in breakfasting and readying the camp for our exodus. I felt guilty lying idle while everyone else worked around me, but felt too ill to even attempt arguing. A servant packed my belongings while Eowyn was at breakfast. She returned awhile later with her brother in tow. She grabbed a few things she thought I might need and then directed her brother, "Carry Lothiriel to the carriage, Eomer."
My eyes flew open and Eomer exclaimed, "Eowyn!"
"What? Do not be foolish. You are here and able bodied. Surely she is not too much for you to carry!" Eomer decided not to argue with the look of determination on his sister's face and turned to me.
"With your permission, my lady?" he asked, and I nodded in response. He rolled his eyes at me as he quickly scooped me up in my blankets and followed Eowyn from the tent. We got a few curious looks as we made our way to the King's carriage, and I kept my face firmly averted lest I break out laughing at the absurdity of it all.
My father was nearby when we approached the carriage and looked mortified, but seemed appeased when Eowyn opened the carriage door and directed her brother, "Lay her inside - and gently, Eomer!" As it was clear this was Eowyn's idea, I hoped that would spare me my father's wrath.
As he lay me down on the carriage seat, Eomer gave me a wink. "My lady, may I stop by later to see how you are faring?"
I stifled a laugh, and responded, "I would welcome it, my lord." With a grin, he left and Eowyn deposited my things on the other seat. Then I was left alone until camp was broken and we started out.
I slept quite a bit and had no more bouts of nausea, for which I was grateful. Periodically throughout the journey, I received visits from my father, brothers, Faramir, Eowyn and Queen Arwen. Not until late in the afternoon did Eomer reappear.
"How are you feeling?" he asked.
"Better, but not well yet." He noticed me shading my face from the sun coming through the window and reached over to release the window curtains.
"Is that better?"
"Much." I lay there with my eyes closed until I heard him chuckle.
Opening my eyes, I gave him a questioning look.
"I told you there were other, less dangerous ways of being able to speak with me in private, and while this does qualify as less dangerous, I am not certain it could be considered less noticeable. Not to mention, you have put so much effort into it that now you do not seem inclined to talk!"
I smiled ruefully. "Then I shall have to plan better next time. Perhaps this was ill-conceived!"
"On the other hand, you do get a carriage all to yourself, so you do not need to entertain the other occupants with tales of that uncouth King of Rohan," he commented slyly.
I was unable to stifle a laugh. "But, my lord, I rather enjoyed that!"
"I do not doubt it for a minute!" He paused, then said, "Be well. I had best get back before this looks suspicious." Giving my hand a squeeze, he exited the carriage and I was left alone but smiling. If I had to be ill, his visit had certainly made it less onerous to bear.
xxxxx
My father made sure that I was removed from the carriage by Faramir, before Eowyn could commandeer her brother again. After supper, I was again treated to a stream of visitors, but this time Eomer came in company with others and we were not able to speak privately. By the next day, I was largely recovered.
And so our trip to Edoras continued. Now that we were deep into Rohan, I could see the plains and mountains that Eomer had indicated he missed. They were, indeed, wonderful to behold, and I fell in love with the place. To be fair, I think I have fallen in love with every place I have visited, since I am such an unseasoned traveller, but Rohan was indeed different, and well worth appreciating.
When we were some two or three days out of Edoras, we were met with riders coming from that city. Eomer's Doorward, Gamling, had come with an escort to discuss some matters with the King. Eowyn told me later that they were having difficulty finding housing for all the visitors coming for Theoden's funeral. She had offered to share her room with me, which prompted Faramir to offer sharing with one of my brothers, and my other two brothers could share as well. That freed up a little more space.
When King Elessar heard that a suite of rooms had been prepared for him and his wife, he declined such extravagance. He indicated he and the Queen would be fine in a single room and the others could be made available to hold other guests. Quietly, Eowyn explained they had decided to put the King and Queen in Theoden's room, as it was the largest, but she confessed she thought Eomer just reluctant to claim it for himself as yet.
Gamling departed the next morning to return and continue his preparations for our arrival. His presence had sparked a note of excitement as we drew nearer our destination. Few in the entourage had ever been to Edoras, and they were looking forward to a glimpse of the capital city of Gondor's ally.
The night before our expected arrival at Edoras, just as we arrived at our intended campsite, Eomer rode back and invited a number of us to join him in riding on a little further as camp was made. My family and I joined in the small group, and I welcomed the chance to ride at something faster than a walk, as did Elrothiel. It was difficult to rein her in when Eomer signaled us to a stop.
All eyes were on our host, so we did not immediately realize his purpose, but then he pointed into the distance to a city high on a hill. The setting sun had not dropped so low behind the mountain as to conceal its rays from the city, even though we were already in semi-darkness where we sat. "Edoras," Eomer announced proudly. The look on his face spoke volumes of his love for his home, and indeed it presented quite a striking picture at this moment. I was eager for a closer view.
