Emmett's Thoughts Ch3
Colossal Cuddly Teddy Bear

Emmett's POV.

Emmett Cullen's journal!
I'm back again, sneaking around to write about my pathetic life after death. By the time I realized what I was thinking, it was over. My anger was gone, my frustration at Rose was gone, my frustrations at myself over this whole teddy bear thing was gone. Gone, gone, gone. Everything I was feeling became lost to me.
End journal entry.

I am a damn teddy bear and now, I guess I don't care. I'm not much in the mood for writing now and I closed the journal. Once I put it back into its hiding place I leave the room. My destination was, I guess, to go see if anything was on TV. It doesn't take me long to reach the room down stairs but once I saw everyone else already there I didn't want to go inside. I stood at the door, trying to think of a reason not to go in but I couldn't. Its my house too after all.

"Hi, Emm." Bella says hesitantly as she notices me in the door way, she looks aware that Rose and I had been fighting.

"Umm, Emmett. Maybe you didn't get the memo but a date night isn't supposed to end in a blood bath between you and the Mrs." Edward said jokingly, he was laughing at something on TV.

"Whatever." I said without any real emotion behind it and quickly move on into the next room, the kitchen seemed empty enough.

I wanted to be left alone, in this house, I should have known that wasn't going to be an option. As soon as I sat at the kitchen counter to drop my head upon, I heard footsteps coming in behind me. It didn't take a glance to know who had followed me in here and to know that as much as I love her, I didn't want to talk right now.

"Hey, … you okay, big guy?" Bella tip toed beside me. "We all heard about what happened last night. Wanna talk about it?"

"No … not really." I mumbled into the counter tops. "If you all know, thank you ALICE, then what could there to be talk about?"

"Don't blame her, Alice saw the vision but Edward was the one that explain it to everyone." Bella defended our sister. "Edward didn't mean any harm either, he was just shocked."

"She hates me. … She should hate me. I hate me." I mutter softly.

"She doesn't hate you, and you shouldn't hate yourself either Emm." Bella says while placing her hand on my shoulder." We all know what its like to get stressed over jealousy and well … Rose likes to push your buttons more than the rest of us."

I was confused because our fight was more than just a little jealousy and Alice had to have seen that, otherwise she wouldn't have had a vision in the first place. I looked up at Bella to see if she was simply sugar coating what she was saying but I couldn't read anything sign that she knew more than what she was saying. She was a terrible lair and such a klutz that it wasn't hard to tell if she was hiding something but she didn't seem be to at the moment.

"Jealousy?" I started to question but then thought better not. "Is that what was bugging me so much. You really think so?"

"Emm, Rose never came home last night." Bella whispered as if not to upset me but thinking I hadn't noticed. "She's upset too."

"I'll keep that in mind." I threw my head to the counter again, probably leaving a dent. "Can I be alone now, please, Sis?"

"… Sure Emm." She said after some thought and then just rushed off into another room, probably to find Edward again.

I was left alone for a while, just sitting there, head down trying to clear my head. Then suddenly it dawned on me. Rosalie hadn't come home last night. I know she walked away long before I did least night. I watched as she shook her head and then flipped her hair. Her hard scowl morphed into a sad frown just before she turned and ran in the direction she came. I stood there for hours longer before I slowly drifted off home. When I got home and found our room empty, I assumed she'd gone back to that club to blow off some steam before coming home. But she hasn't come.

"What if she went home with some guy!" I said out loud to no one and to nothing at all. "I have to go find her, now."

I was gone before I finished talking. Out the door and heading straight for the garage. I was going to get in a car and start looking for signs of her back at the club but I didn't even get to my jeep before I heard the banging. Metal clanking together and things being thrown around at high speeds. Crashing sounds filled the air from outside the closed doors. I didn't need a brain to figure out what all the racket was all about. Rose, … breaking my jeep apart and smashing what got in her way just so she could fix it again. This is was she did when she was frustrated and couldn't think.

I walked inside without any noise and spotted her surrounded by the remains of what used to be my jeep. "Been here all night?"

She started at the sound of my voice and almost through a hammer at my head. "EMMETT!" Rose shouted in shock. "What, … what are you doing in here? You know I'll fix the damn thing."

"I was on my way out to look for you. Good thing you're already here, I don't think my jeep would have made that far." I joked, testing how angry she was at me based on her response.

"I said I'll fix it Emm." Rose didn't sound angry, she sounded defeated as she spoke now, only cause me more confusion and pain. "I messed up Emm, I got angry and I shouldn't have. Sorry."

"You got angry?" I stated baffled for a moment. "I was the one that snapped last night. I was the one that was being petty."

"But how could you not?" Rose asked as she dropped the hammer to the floor. "All these years and you've only thought I was with you because your face reminded me of a Henry. Of my long gone friend Vera's baby boy, Henry. Of the human child that I'd longed for all these years. Emmett, how could you not hate me for making you feel that way. For making you think that's the only reason I'd fallen in love with you and stayed with you?"

"So, it is true then?" I asked dreading the answered but knowing I needed to hear her say it now. "My face still reminds you of him?"

"Damn it Emmett!" Rose snapped at me. "YES! When I first saw you in those woods, that's what I saw. I saw the perfect face of a child that I could never bare myself. I saw what I wanted most in both worlds and that which I could never have. BUT that's not why I've stayed with you all these years! I've stayed because I'd fallen in love with you! I stayed because I found my true sole mate, Emmett. No one has ever truly loved me the way you have. No one else has ever seen me as anything more than a beautiful face other than that you. People that see me, think I'm shallow and vain, and I am! I know I'm, I was born beautiful and constantly praised because of that. It made me vain and self-centered, people envied me and admired me. I was self-absorbed, shallow, and materialistic. But I was happy just being me, hoping for the future I was promised. Living a beautiful life, a nice husband, a few kids running around and growing old with my family. That life was taken from me all because of my beauty! Because of my stupidity."

I stood there, stunned for a moment. Just letting her words sink in before I realized … Rose was practically in tears before me. We as vampires can't really cry tears anymore, but that doesn't mean our emotions can't come out in a similar way. I rushed to her side and wrapped her in my arms, usually she'd try to push me away before giving in, this time she didn't fight with me. I held her as she expressed herself in a way only I got to see her in. She was so vulnerable like this and it made my heart ach to see but it also made me feel special, like I truly did belong to her and her to me.

"You are anything but stupid Rosie." I saying knowing the name alone will piss her off and bring back some normal Rose.

I can feel her tense at the nickname but not as much as normal. "Emmett, stop calling me that." Rose whispered not in anger like I'd hoped for but in a soft defeated tone from crying.

"Come on Love, it's a cute name." I teased simply.

"You can't make me feel better by pissing me off, Emmett." Rose accused sharply and I could tell it was working.

"What? … All I said was that Rosie was a cute nickname." I answered back sounding as innocent as I could. "Which it is."

"Emmett, I'm warning you!" Rose stated as she tensed up farther. "Its not funny and you know I hate that name!"

"Alright Love, I promise I'll stop calling you Rosie if you promise not to be mad at me over this whole fight?" I said hoping she'd take me up on this compromise so things could go back to normal.

"I have to fix your jeep first." Rose said determinedly as she stood and looked around the garage full of broken parts.

I shrugged. "Fix it tomorrow, I've got no where else to go for now." I said simply just wanted to get back up stairs. "Besides, I can think of a better way for us to spend the time now."

"I can't just leave it like this Emmett!" Rose said in shock at the very idea of us leaving her work unfinished. "It's a mess!"

"ROSE, I just fixed our relationship after a huge fight, shouldn't that be enough things fixed for one night?" I complained softly. "I want to go back up stairs and break … different things?"

"Did you just wiggle your eyebrows at me Emm?" Rose asked and tried not to laugh but was unsuccessful. "Really?"

"Come on, Babe. Its totally what I do best!" I said confidently while repeating the action with my eyebrows. "You love it!"

"Alright, you big …" Rose started but I cut her off.

"Don't say it! … Don't even think the words teddy bear!" I snapped before I could stop myself, an issue for another day.

"Fine, … cuddly bear." Rose countered with a smirk and then took my hand as she lead me back to the house. "Now, why don't we go up stairs as you suggested and you can prove to me what a 'grizzle bear' you think you are, alright. Sound good Emm?"

I didn't have to think about it, I was smiling from ear to ear. "Alright, lets go Rosie Love." I said as I whipped around, swinging her into my arms, I then ran the rest of the way to our bedroom.

"EMMETT!" Rose screamed in my ear. "DON'T FUCKING CALL ME THAT NAME EVER AGAIN! YOU IDIOT!"

She yelled at me until we were in our room and the door was closed but then she stopped and smiled. She was laughing at the dumb innocent face I was giving her now. It wasn't perfect but by the time the morning comes, I'm sure we will have had our date night ending. The one we both missed out on the night before. The ending that should have been happy and wonderful, spent most in between the sheets of our very useful-sleepless bed. Rose was slowly getting back to her normal self which was making me happy and helping me to get over everything that had happened. Rose and I don't fight a lot, we spat and shout a lot, … well she does, but its never really about a fight. Its been years since our last real fight and I hope to go at least ten more years before another.

Emmett Cullen's journal!
I started writing again once Rose slipped out to go fix the mess in the garage. She seemed in a much better mood and so was I. It was the perfect ending to an awful day. Of course, Edward and everyone heard what had happened and the jokes started flying around but I didn't care. Rose was mine and I am happy to have her. Even if I am a colossal cuddly teddy bear! Rose still loves me!
End journal entry.