And, after a veeeeeeery long break, the story's back! Sorry it took so long.
I do not own Naruto.
Chapter 3: The NEW Akatsuki Band
One morning, while the Akatsuki were having their usually chaotic breakfast together, Itachi started criticizing Zetsu and his cooking.
"Zetsu..." Itachi whined. "Pancakes... AGAIN?! You KNOW I prefer waffles!!"
"Well, I keep telling you to keep your CD player off of the table, but do you listen to ME?!" Zetsu retorted.
"But I love this CD!! It reminds me of home!!" Itachi shot back.
"But... Itachi-sama, that's Screechy Sounds from Sasuke!" Kisame said, wondering if Itachi was well in the head.
Itachi recoiled from the CD player and ripped off his headphones. Then, he slid the CD player across the table to Tobi. "Break this for me, ok? My ears are bleeding and I have a massive headache!!"
"Ok!" Tobi said cheerfully. He'd NEVER pass up the chance to destroy something! But when Tobi smashed the CD player, Itachi started crying.
"Noooooo! I meant the CD not the CD PLAYER!!" Itachi sobbed. "That took me ages to save up for on my meager Akatsuki allowance!!"
"You should have been more specific!!" Tobi yelled. "How was I supposed to know?!"
Then the Akatsuki leader came out, all shadowy and digitally pixilated. "No fighting at the table, kiddies!!" he/she yelled.
"What happened to you… un?" cried Deidara.
"Long story. Anyway... what's for breakfast? Please don't tell me it's pancakes AGAIN Zetsu. You KNOW I prefer waffles," he/she said.
"That's what I've been saying. But Zetsu NEVER listens to me... And Tobi broke my CD player!" Itachi added quickly.
"What?! You told me to break it!" Tobi protested.
"A likely story!! Do you hear him, making LIES!! I would never do such a thing... KISAME!! You're a bad influence!!" Itachi said, looking at the Akatsuki leader with puppy eyes. "You still love me right... Right?"
"Of course I do, little Itachi! Zetsu! Make waffles! Tobi, you're grounded until you pay for Itachi's CD player. Kisame, stop being a bad influence," Leader said.
Itachi stuck out his tongue at Kisame, Tobi, and Zetsu. He paused. "But… what am I going to listen to now?" Itachi said, resuming his puppy-eyed look.
"We should make another band!" shouted Kakuzu. "Then we can make tons of money!"
Hidan rolled his eyes. "It's always about money with you, huh?"
"What was that?!" Kakuzu yelled, jumping up and choking Hidan.
The two rolled off into the other room.
Itachi blinked. "I think that's an awesome idea! We should start another band!"
"Yeah!" Kisame, Deidara, and Zetsu chorused, Deidara adding a "Un!"
"Another band? What happened to the first one?" Tobi asked.
"Oh, right. You're new." Kisame said knowingly. "Well, a few years ago, when we still had Sasori, we made a band. But Zetsu went on a rampage and ate all the fans…" Kisame shook his head. "It didn't turn out well…" He glared at Zetsu.
"Hey… I was hungry!"
"Well, then. Another band is what we shall make!" Leader said, sitting down. "I'm much too busy, but you guys may. First, decide what you shall do in the band."
"I wanna play guitar!" Itachi shouted.
"I wanna play guitar… un!" Deidara yelled back.
"I'm gonna play guitar!" Itachi sneered.
"I'm gonna play guitar… un!" Deidara screamed.
"BOYS! Deidara can play bass guitar and Itachi can play electric. Happy?" Leader said impatiently. Sometimes it was hard keeping these delinquents in line.
"Fine…un. Itachi always gets all the cool stuff…un," Deidara mumbled. Itachi stuck his tongue out again.
"I'll be the singer…" Kisame said. "Cuz I'm the best!"
Everyone rolled their eyes. Nevertheless, no one else wanted to sing, so Kisame ended up being their singer.
It was decided that Tobi would be their drummer, and Zetsu would… Well, Zetsu would be their mascot.
And thus, the NEW Akatsuki band was formed…
