Oh my god. You will never believe what today's adventure is. Suzaku has finally crossed the line. He's finally done what no one was able to do before.
Suzaku has signed up Lelouch to L.A. Fitness.
The best part about this?
Lelouch has no idea.
(A/N: I suggest you read 'Wardrobe 101 in my Lelouch and Kallen Conversation's story to understand a part of this chapter!)
L: Suzaku where the hell are you taking me?
S: Sh, we're almost there!
L: Is this blindfold really necessary?
S: Yes!
L: And the ear plugs?
S: Of course!
L: And binding my wrists together?
S: You bettcha!
L: You know, if I didn't know any better I'd think this was...you know...
S: What?
L: You're really this stupid? I mean I can understand the last two chapters, but really?
S: Huh?
L: Never mind.
S: Oo look we're here!
L: Great! You wanna untie me?
S: No!
L: Bastard.
S: Okay I'll come around and open your door and then I'll show you the surprise!
L: Great, can't wait.
...
S: Alright, now open your eyes!
...
L: ...Oh my god...
S: Isn't it just beautiful! *tear*
L: ...
S: I understand Lelouch. You're speechless!
L: ...
S: Take in this moment, cherish it forever!
L: ...Hey, Suzaku?
S: Yes, Lelouch?
L: WHY THE HELL ARE WE IN FRONT OF LA FITNESS?
S: Duh, to get fit! And you say I'm the dumb one. Silly Lulu.
L: Okay, two things. One, you are and forever will be the dumb one. That's a forever fact that will last for the entire series, trust me. And two, never, never, call me Lulu again.
S: Aw, but it's cute!
L: That was wrong on so many levels.
S: Anyway, come on let's go in!
L: Oh no, there is no way I'm walking through those doors. Uh-uh.
S: It's okay, I already got you a membership!
L: YOU DID WHAT?
S: I know right? I'm just awesome like that.
L: Really? Cuz those aren't really the feelings I'm having about you right now.
S: Admiration? Loyalty? Undying love.
L: Ha, you wish.
S: Eh?
L: There is no way in hell am I going inside that...that...torture chamber.
S: Torture chamber? Geez your mind's pretty missed up huh?
L: You don't even know the half of it.
S: Well if I told you Kallen was in there working out for two hours in a really tight work out suit, would you go in?
L: ...
S: She's really shinnnyyy! :D
L: ...Fine...
S: Yay!
...
S: Ah breathe that in Lelouch. Isn't it such a wonderful smell?
L: Oh yeah. Sweat, rubber, and more sweat? Put it in a bottle slap on a sticker that says 'Sweat' and sell it at Macy's.
S: Good idea! Is that what you want to do for a living Lelouch?
L: Oh yeah, that and taking over Britannia.
S: WHAT?
L: Look, treadmills.
S: Ooo! We should try those out first? Ready Lelouch?
L: No.
S: Great!
...
L: Suzaku...I can't...take it...anymore.
S: Lelouch, you can do it1
L: I feel...like...I'm...gonna...die...
S: Come on, buddy! Push through! Persevere! Fight!
L: ...Can't...go on...
S: Lelouch, no!
L: Suzaku...just...go on...without me...
S: No! I won't leave you behind!
L: Tell...tell Kallen...
S: Yes? Tell her what?
L: Tell her...to follow...the four b's... (LKC reference)
S: Okay! Okay, I will! But Lelouch?
L: ...Yes, my old friend?
S: You know I can just stop the treadmill and you can take a break, right?
L: ...Oh.
S: There, now it's stopped.
L: Do me a favor and forget what I just said before.
S: What?
L: Thank god you're an idiot.
S: Now, let's see the results of your five minute walk.
L: Just five minutes? And I walked?
S: Yeah, didn't you notice?
L: It felt like hours! And I was definitely sprinting!
S: No...it says here you walked for 5 minutes and 32 seconds and at a speed of 1.5 miles an hour. And just by the way that's pretty slow. Really slow, actually.
L: No way.
S: Way.
L: Impossible! Do you see how sweaty I am?
S: Not only that but I can smell it too. You should really think more about that perfume business.
L: You know what I've learned from this Suzaku?
S: Yeah?
L: You seem to be even more stupid when you're around exercise equipment, which really shouldn't have been that hard to figure out. I bet you get all high and happy when you see all this stuff, don't you?
S: Ah, you got that right.
L: Figured as much.
S: What do you want to do now?
L: Go home.
S: But Lelouch you've only worked out for five minutes! How about we do some weight lifting?
L: Do we have to?
S: Yes.
L: Really?
S: Yes.
L: Ugh.
S: No buts.
L: But I-
S: Hey, what did I just say mister?
L: *mumbles* No buts.
S: That's right. Now follow me and try not to get lost.
L: Yes, dad.
S: :D
L: -_-
...
L: Ugh...8...9...10! I did it!
S: Good job! How many pounds was that one?
L: Two!
S: Really Lelouch? Just two pounds?
L: Do you have any idea how heavy this is?
S: Yes I do, cuz when I was five that's what I used to lift. Nowadays I got for 150, or 200 if it's a good day.
L: Are you insane?
S: Funny, that's what everyone thinks. Weird...
L: I think you're the weird one my friend.
S: Nonsense Lulu, nonsense.
L: Suzaku what did I say about the nicknames?
S: Only call you them in bed?
L: No! Well, only if you want to-
S: Oh look its Kallen!
L: Hey you said we'd see her when I walked through the door!
S: Ha whoops.
L: You lying little boy.
S: Hey I'm not little! I'm a very big boy thank you very much! A big boy with big boy body parts!
K: Um, do I wanna know what you guys were just talking about?
L: Must you be such a pervert Kallen? My god, will you please act like a lady?
K: *punch*
S: Hey Kallen! What's up?
K: Nothing much, just heading out. Spent a good five hours working out today, I need some well deserved rest.
S: Way to go!
K: Now, what the hell is he doing here?
L: Believe it or not, I am now a member of this terrible facility of exercise torture.
K: No way.
L: Way.
K: How'd you pull this one off, Suzaku?
S: Oh you know, the usual. Blindfolds, ear plugs, wrist binding.
K: Ehh...
L: Trust me it's not what you think.
K: You sure? Cuz I really wouldn't be that surprised.
L: Really? Well in that case...
S: Hey guys, guess what!
L: What?
K: What's up?
S: We're locked in!
K: WHAT?
L: NOO!
S: Yeah, today's national pie day so the gym closed early.
L: Why the hell would the gym close for national pie day?
S: Don't dis the pie Lelouch. Don't dis the pie.
K: I'm not 'dissing' the pie or anything but seriously why would they close?
S: The pie is sacred! Sacred I tell you!
L: Okay this is really off topic. Why don't we just leave and get outta her-
S: No! We are not leaving until you and Kallen see the awesomeness that is pie!
K: I like pie and all, but do you know how many calories are in one slice?
L: Yea and all that sugar too.
K: Not to mention carbs from the crust.
L: Ah true and if you have a crumbly topping-
S: ENOUGH!
...
S: Everything is good in moderation, junk food and sweets is okay as long as you don't pig out on it.
L: Then why the hell did you freak out when I was eating potato chips that one time.
S: Oh that's a simple answer.
L: And that is?
S: I just love messing with you!
K: Ha, funny.
L: ...
S: Heh, catcha later Kallen!
L: SUZAKUUUU!
hope you liked it! and please if you haven't already check out my LELOUCH AND KALLEN CONVERSATIONS story!
