It is sooooooo hard and time-consuming to write chapters for stories that no-one even reads. But, I was reading the other episodes of this series, and suddenly became inspired. Don't ask me why, you ungrateful brats. Here ya go!


Calvin An' Hobbes: Not Really A TV Series - Episode 3: Warped At 5,000 Degrees Cliché, Or Not

Calvin was le tired. Hobbes was too.

"Hrmm. I wonder where le accent grave is." Calvin muttered.

"Calvin, weren't you going to deliver a speech to the audience?" Hobbes said.

"You mean the soul-crushing one?"

"No."

"The one where we make a resolution to be like an "ordinary" C&H TV show?"

"Yea."

"Alright, Hobbes, YOU WIN HIS TIME. -sigh- For today's episode, viewers, we will be more "ordinary", like most other cookiecutter C&H TV shows clogging up Nickelodeon like condos in Florida(or suburbs in Colorado Springs, for that matter). I have a feeling that we won't enjoy this. groan" Calvin spoke not unlike John F. Kennedy. Noble man, he was.

"But, viewers, if we're going to so this, then let us enjoy one last moment of randomness." Calvin raised his hand to his heart, just as Doctor Brainstorm landed in his red rocket, and yelled:

"CLAV1N AH SH3L PWN J00 LOL"

"You mean Sheila?" Calvin inquired.

"Oh, I do NOT want to hear the upcoming-

"GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111 HULK SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH!!11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111 NO, WAIT, I CONFUSED HIM AND ME! SHEILA SMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASH!!1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111" Sheila Brainstorm rudely interrupted Hobbes right in the middle of his sentence.

Dr. Frnak died from the sheer loudness.

"IT'S DOCTOR FRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANK! Wait, what did I just say?" Brainstorm's dead body mumbled on like a zombie.

"It's a good thing that this story is not set within the Swing123 and garfieldodie universe, or else the universe would have imploded!" Jack was clearly samrtrr than Brainstorm, anyways.

And Jack left with FRANK's dead body. Heh. Lol. Frank Miller from Dead Rising. Brainstorm's probably going to start a zombie army, considering the way he mumbled when I called him Frank for the (NOT) last time. And Frank Miller's gonna kill him.

"I'd like to see him take on Dr. Thunderstorm as a zombie now!" Calvin snickered.

Oh, deary me, it seems that we have failed on our randomless-ness quota for this episode! Ah, well. Let's do something else, shall we? How about a…

FAIRY ODDPARENTS CROSSOVER!

"This early in the series?! You gotta be kidding me!" Calvin complained.

Alright, so I was joking.

"Damn RIGHT you better have!" Hobbes backed up Calvin.

So, everyone returns to their normal duties. Because, Calvin made a pledge to be normal, AND BY GOD, WE SHALL FOLLOW IT!


So, later that day, C&H were taking a fine stroll down the sidewalk by their house, Mom was watering the plants, Dad was mowing the lawn, and everyone was doing their summer thang. But suddenly Moe and his gang came along.

"Hey, Twinky, ready for another butt exam?" Moe growled threateningly.

"sigh Moe, you know it's called a rectal examination." Calvin was sick of Moe's "games".

But before Moe could do a thing, he and his cronies died of heart attacks. Simultaneously. Don't ask me how.

"Well, that takes care of that!" Calvin said.

"Oooh, Calvin, look! It's Microsoft Word! And he doesn't look too happy!" Hobbes pointed out.

"What? I thought he was dead!" Calvin replied in surprise.

"WELL, I'M NOT! AS LONG AS SMOKIN' TACOS KEEPS USING ME AS HIS PRIMARY WORD PROCESSOR, I RULE! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Microsoft Word exclaimed.

"Well, Hobbes, what should we do? Fight, or flight?" Calvin whispered back to Hobbes.

"Hrmm. Lemme think." Hobbes whispered back.

Microsoft Word pulled out an AutoCorrect scimitar. No one else in the neighborhood seemed to notice though.

"HAHAHAHA! GO BACK TO COMMUNIST RUSSIA-IMEAN THE REALM OF COOKIECUTTER C&H TV SERIESES, WHERE YOU BELONG! MORTAL FOOL! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" MS Word yelled threateningly.

"I'd say RUN FOR OUR LIVES, Calvin." Hobbes suggested.

"Yeah, that sounds good."

And, so, the two ran like the A-Team does sometimes, and Microsoft Word gave chase. The curtain drops, the credits roll, the Communist anthem plays, and MS Word is now an official CAH:NRATVS villain, albeit a minor one.

THE END

(to this episode, anyways)


Hrmm. I'd say a pretty good episode. Sorry for not updating a lot, I have other things to do other stories to read (and write). As if anyone cares, lol. If I offend anyone because of this series, I offer my apologies. This is a comedy series, if you don't like it, read something else, and if you must point it out, don't be a condescending, cocky coffer, will ya?

Oh, and please, R&R! It's a poor series, and it needs money for food and clothing! PLEASE! Donate! R AND R!