After being shoved through security, rather violently, insulted verbally by a group of 12 year olds and beaten up by an old lady, Heinz was beginning to think that going to Roger was a bad idea. Standing at the Mayor's door, Heinz felt, for the first time in his life, intimidated by his brother. It was never fear, never insecurity, just jealousy, that drove Heinz to label himself as Evil Scientist. In truth, Heinz did have a doctorate, from an accredited university, Yale.

"To think that one such as me would dare stoop to such low standards of living" Heinz thought to himself, "I have created machines that defy the very laws of physics and the best thing that I can use it for is overcomplicated and poorly planned revenge schemes on The Honorable Mayor Roger Doofenshrimtz. I suppose if I wanted to, I could turn myself around. I bet I can even win the Prize!"

Heinz looked up at the top of the door, on it was a plaque. It was one of those standard inspirational plaques that are often found in churches, courthouses, universities and some doctor offices, with the kind of phrases that while conveying some great epiphany about life or other mystery, rarely achieve the desired effect. Often times, such plaques are seen as pompous and frankly annoying, depending on the quote, even more so when it is a motto or common phrase, which can be attributed to egotism and over self promotion. However, this is not for every plaque, for all plaques are viewed differently by different people and have various effects. It is however, the view that Heinz Doofenshrimtz had when looking at this particular one above the Mayor's door.

"Open this door with clear conscious, an open hand and a friendly smile. May all those who enter here acknowledge the fact that they are in a scared holy place, one that is free of prejudice of all kinds and that both lord and servant, Mayor and Citizen, stand on common ground."

Heinz slowly and quietly knocked on the door, causing it to open slightly upon contact. Peering in, ignoring the depth of the room, which was considerable, his eyes heading straight for the desk, made of cedar, Heinz was appalled to find Roger sitting at his desk and doing what he was supposed to, run the city. Roger, in Heinz's mind, was the extreme definition of The People's Man. Rarely in the office, and thus rarely doing his job, leaving most of the work to his secretaries, Roger was always among the masses. It was getting to the point where Heinz described it as an addiction, one that was so deadly that it was all consuming. Every week there was some kind of event, usually a gala type event and every week Roger would dress up to the nines and go mingle with people he knew nothing about. It was almost sickening, Heinz thought, that the Mayor wouldn't even bother to learn a single person's name. It was understandable, for Roger was the Mayor and thus couldn't be expected to remember everyone; it was more so the fact that Roger didn't even try.

"Hello Roger" Heinz said as he sat down in the nearest chair, Roger not bothering to look up from his work, as if Heinz didn't even exist at all.

"Please go away" Roger exclaimed annoyingly, "I'm rather busy as I'm sure you can see and can't be bothered with the trivial problems of civilians."

Heinz slammed his hand on the desk, demanding Roger's attention. Without so much as giving him a second to respond, Heinz leaned in, yanked Roger's work from his hands and was disgusted to find that it was Sunday's newest crossword puzzle.

"You talk about equality" Heinz berated, "You talk about civic duty and you talk about brotherhood as if those things matter to you. Whoever your writers are pretty damn good at convincing people that you're God because personally no one is that perfect! And this-"

Heinz shook the crossword puzzle in Roger's face, the Mayor still didn't bother looking in Heinz's direction, too much of his attention on figuring out where his crossword puzzle had gone.

"This is proof!" Heinz continued, "You're sitting here on your ass while a city is going on about its business as if it isn't about to go bankrupt. Have you even looked at your budget? The one that you said you would follow? I bet you haven't because so far, in one month alone, you've spent 1.5 million dollars on parades, parties and Roger Doofenshrimtz Day, a day that should be banned because that is 1.5 million dollars that could have gone to Danville's public school system, the OWCA and the city parks, all of which you said you would fix."

Roger, at this point, was tired of listening and simply wanted to be left to his mundane task. It was at this moment that Roger stood up and saw his brother, who upon seeing him ran the extremely short distance between them and embraced him.

"Heinz" Roger said happily as he broke away, "It's so good to see you! Sorry I didn't get any of your calls, things have been hectic lately. What with the fundraisers and charity events, I barely have time for work anymore. And then there's Mother and Father, dying and everything."

Heinz shook his head; he didn't consider Roger's Mother and Father to be his parents. To call them such would be an insult to himself, for they treated him more like an object, a useless object, instead of the person that he was. Heinz's real parents were actually a pair of ocelots, Jean-Baptiste and Josephine, whom he met during his escape from Droolestein to South America which is a story for another time.

"I'm sorry about that Roger" Heinz replied indifferently as he calmed down, "I know that you were very close to them."

Roger raised his eyebrows curiously, confused by Heinz's denial, "What are you getting at?" Roger asked, "They were your parents too."

Heinz shrugged, showing even more indifference than before, "While you were busy living the good life in Droolestein, meeting women and getting the big promotions, I was in Brazil for three whole years. Didn't you notice the missing lawn gnome?"

Roger laughed humbly at this, for he had often wondered what happened to the aforementioned lawn gnome, who happened to be Heinz Doofenshrimtz.

"That was you!" Roger said trying not to laugh, "Oh you'll never know how many nights I spent wishing for the magic lawn gnome to return. I would sing every night, hoping that he would appear so that I would have someone else to talk to besides the Moon."

Heinz huffed, slightly offended by the statement. "You could've talked to me" he pointed out, "I'm your brother Roger."

Roger shrugged, "You were a quiet boy Heinz, what was there to talk about? School, please, why child wants to talk about their education? No, you would much rather sit at home and read than actually get out and socialize."

Heinz resisted the urge to slap Roger in the face and decided to cut to the chase. Before he could bring it up however, Roger gave him an unexpected opening.

"You're looking rather spiffy today" Roger commented, "What's the occasion? You finally caught that platypus you've told me so much about?"

Heinz shook his head, letting out a small laugh, "We're not exactly enemies" he admitted, "Just friends who constantly disagree on a subject. Like politics, or religion, or who could be control of the Tri State Area."

Roger nodded in understanding, "I see" he said, more so for the sake of himself, "So what's the getup for then?"

Heinz smiled gingerly, "Charlene" he answered, "I'm going to try and make it work again Roger. It's just a date, no big deal."

Roger sighed and hung his head, "You're still up on this Charlene woman? I told you Heinz she doesn't give a damn about you. You can do better than her; you should do better than her."

Heinz sighed in turn, for he had a feeling that Roger wouldn't understand. In his head, Heinz knew that Charlene didn't care about him, at least not like she used to. Still, he liked to believe that something was there, that deep down in Charlene's heart there was a place for him. It didn't matter if the place was somewhere different, if it was smaller than it was before; all that mattered to Heinz was that Charlene cared.

"If you've ever loved someone" Heinz answered softly, "You would know that the heart wants what the heart wants. If you've ever lost someone, you would understand that the heart needs to be broken before it truly appreciates what it lost, loving it even more when it is mended again."

Roger rolled his eyes, absolutely hating the fact that Heinz was going through with his plan, still he figured the least he could do was give directions.

"Charlene lives on the north side of town. 7645 Doofenshrimtz Drive, and before you get any ideas about her caring for you because she lives on a street that bares your name, I'm telling that it was the only property that suited her."

Heinz wrote down the information on the napkin inside his jacket pocket and headed towards the door. Just as he was about to leave, Roger stopped him.

"Heinz" he said, "Please...Don't get your hopes up. I've heard that she's looking for someone else."

Heinz nodded, "Then they'll just have to deal with me" he replied.

Roger laughed at the idea, for Heinz wasn't physically fit by any means, "They'll pulverize you Heinz!" he exclaimed, "You're better off just forgetting about her. Move on!"

Heinz simply ignored him and made his way out the door heading towards Charlene's house. Roger meanwhile, returned to his crossword puzzle continuing to do nothing, being of no benefit to anyone but himself, which was a stretch to begin with.