Is it possible to get sun poisoning even if you weren't in the sun that long, like ten minutes at the most? Not the right place to ask this, I know, but I feel like I'm going to pass out and that's the only questionable thing I've done in the past few days, otherwise there's no explanation and answers would be appreciated, thank you.


Saturday, January 21st, 2012

He was going back to a place he hoped he'd never see again. The rest of Manhattan was sinking behind him as he went up, up, up. The portal was coming closer, Chitauri soldiers continuing to pour out of it from the depths of space. The nuke on his back was a heavy weight, one that pressed down on him hard. He had less than a dozen seconds before it exploded. He needed to get it through the portal.

Steeling himself as he passed through the ring of blue light, Tony was instantly struck by the sight before him; a single spacecraft surrounded by dozens of those sky-whales and hundreds upon thousands of Chitauri soldiers. The air was quickly escaping from his suit and he really wished he hadn't told JARVIS to skip the spinning rims. Ocean-proofing wasn't the same thing as space-proofing, but at least then there'd be a chance that the air wouldn't escape as fast. A snowball's chance in Hell, but still a chance.

Out of everything Tony expected his last moments to be like, he never expected himself to be so at peace with dying. He'd been fighting to stave off death for so long (save for that admittedly slightly-suicidal period when he was dying from palladium poisoning) he'd never thought he would just give up, but he was. The world needed him to make this sacrifice and he was ready and willing to make it.

The HUD flickered off. JARVIS' voice faded out. The armor lets go of the nuke. Tony started falling backward. Suddenly, he realized how alone he was. He wanted Steve. He wanted Rhodey and Pepper. He wanted his mom, the original Jarvis, Ana… He'd even give anything to have Banner, Barton, Thor, and Romanoff there. Just somebody. He wanted somebody to be there with him in his final moments of life. No one could be there with him, though, so his brain tried to give him the illusion of what he wanted in the form of an old Hungarian lullaby.

"Szomorú varsnap száz fehér virággal

Vartalek kedvesem templomi imával…"

The nuke detonated and soon Tony was consumed by fire and fury the likes of which the world has never seen.


Tony immediately bolted upright, his breaths coming in fast-paced and ragged. Wherever he was it was dark, too dark, but he still had to be alive because he could still see the glow of the Arc Reactor coming from his chest. At least, that's what he told himself. Further proof that he was still alive came when he heard a sharp click behind him and a bright light filled the room.

"Tony?" He let out a breath of relief as soon as he heard Steve's voice.

Nightmare, he thought. It was just a nightmare. Despite his attempts to reassure himself, Tony couldn't help but be reminded that it wasn't just a nightmare. That happened to him less than four months ago, the only difference being that he hadn't died. He had fallen back through the portal and the Hulk had caught him before he had hit the ground. He was still alive, but it felt like he couldn't escape that moment.

"Tony?" Steve's voice was soft and gentle. Tony could feel the bed shift as he moved closer. "Are you okay?" Steve didn't touch him, and Tony was grateful for that. Sure, he wanted comfort, but he needed a moment.

"Fine," he manages to say, but he knows Steve doesn't believe it. Still, he keeps his hands-off Tony and lets him try to catch his breath. Tony closes his eyes and tries to focus on breathing and not crying.

Letting go of a very pained breath, Tony finally found it in him to turn and look at Steve. His blond hair was a mess and his blue eyes were bearing into him with a look of concern. Slowly trailing his eyes down to Steve's bare chest. There he could see a red mark forming in the shape of a hand. Oops.

"Sorry." Steve gave him a confused look until Tony gestured to the mark in question.

"Oh," he said, waving it off. "Don't worry, it's fine. It'll fade in a minute. What about you?"

Since Tony couldn't put in the energy to lie again, he just shrugged and looked down at his lap. Steve raised his hand and left if hovering at his back for a few seconds before asking "is it alright if I touch you?"

"Yeah," Tony responded quietly with a nod. Steve's hand stroked slowly up and down his back before coming to rest on his shoulder. Tony shut his eyes and leaned into the touch. He still couldn't believe that he and Steve were dating now. He was still waiting for the universe to reveal that this was all an elaborate joke and rip Steve away from him at any moment, so he was determined to enjoy it while he could.

They sat there for a while in silence. Tony tried to process the fact that he was still alive while Steve supported him. It was a nice moment, but the moment had to pass, and Tony started to move to lie back down. Steve shut off the light and did the same, lying on his side to face him.

"Did you have a nightmare?" he asked.

"Yeah," Tony softly confirmed.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"No." He could see Steve's silhouette nod in acceptance.

"Is there anything I can do?" At that, Tony rolled over until his face was against Steve's chest and wrapped his arms around his waist.

"Just be here." Steve's only response was to wrap his arms around Tony and kiss the top of his head.

He didn't go back to sleep, though. While Steve drifted off with seeming ease, Tony was left wide awake and alone. He'd groan in exasperation, but Steve was still asleep next to him and he didn't want to wake him up. He already felt horrible enough for waking him up once. He didn't need Steve to be up all night as well. Speaking of which, he should probably take care of that before he did end up staying up the entire night.

Gently slipping out from under Steve's embrace, Tony quietly padded over to the en suite bathroom, one of the only rooms in the entire apartment that was technically finished. Getting down on his hands and knees, he opened the cabinet under the sink. There, he retrieved an inconspicuous-looking box from the back and produced a flask from inside. Tilting his head back, Tony downed as much alcohol as fast as he could. He got about halfway through the flask before sealing it and putting it back inside the box. The box went back into it's hiding place in the back of the cabinet and pulled himself back up so that he was eye-to-eye with the man in the mirror.

Ignoring how terrible he looked with the black bags under his eyes, Tony pulled the mirror back to open the medicine cabinet. He decided to top the whiskey off with a capful of NyQuil, figuring he could probably use the help falling asleep as well as staying asleep. After that, he rinsed his mouth out with both Listerine and water and took the extra step of brushing his teeth. He hoped that was enough to cover the scent of alcohol, but with Steve's enhanced senses he highly doubted it would make much of a difference.

Turning the light off before opening the door, Tony stepped back out into the bedroom. Slowly and carefully, he slipped himself back under Steve's arm, careful not to wake him. Once he worked himself back into the position he was in before, Tony shut his eyes and pressed his forehead up against Steve's shoulder.

Hopefully, that'll do it, he thought.


"Why am I not surprised that you're just showing up now?" Tony slammed the car door as he spotted Lara across the tarmac, standing by the plane with a cross look that could easily rival Pepper's. "We were supposed to leave thirty minutes ago."

"It's my plane," Tony pointed out. "It leaves when I'm ready."

"I think there might be some rule or regulation somewhere that states that you have to leave when your flight plan says you're going to."

"Sorry about that," he could hear Steve apologize as he stepped closer to the stairs leading up to the plane. "Some of us had a hard time waking up this morning." If Tony were standing closer to him, he'd pinch Steve for saying that, probably on the butt. Instead, he settled for rolling his eyes.

Lara turned to climb up the stairs that led to the plane. Tony followed her, with Steve close behind him. Bruce brought up the rear.

Once onboard the plane, a dark-skinned bald man stood up to shake hands with Tony. He made quick work of introducing the man to Steve and Bruce as Duane Freeman, head of the New York branch's PR department. With all introductions out of the way, Tony took the chance to get settled into one of the booth seats, sitting with his legs stretched out across it. That was until Steve came over and gently pushed his legs aside to sit next to him. Tony gave an annoyed hum at first but scooched over to be closer to Steve once he sat down.

"Hey, stranger," he said.

"Hey yourself," Steve said with a small grin. "What's up?"

"Not much," Tony said. "Why?"

"Just wondering," Steve said. "I know you had nightmares last night and you weren't too agreeable this morning…"

"I'm fine," Tony assured. "And I'll be even finer once this plane is in the air."

Because then I can break out the Jack! Tony felt Steve run his hand up and down his arm comfortingly. Meanwhile, Lara slid into the seat across the aisle from them.

"Any idea when Barton and Romanoff are going to be flying in?" she asked, making eye contact with Tony.

"Nope," Tony said, popping the "p." "They could be coming in earlier or later or they could be at the airport at the same time as us. I have no idea. All I know is that they're flying in from a land far, far away."

"And we're not expecting Thor to show, right?"

"Unless he magically figures out from across space that we're going to be spending the next few days meeting the press and politicians and for some crazy reason he decides he wants in on that, probably not." Lara held up one hand placatingly while she used the other one to scroll through her phone.

"I'm just asking," she said. "A simple no would have sufficed."

"Says the woman who wanted a contingency plan for if Fidel Castro suddenly died." Lara frowned.

"You're going to hold that over me for the rest of my life, aren't you?"

"Probably," Tony shrugged.

"In my defense, I was new to the job," Lara said. "I've learned, gotten better since then."

"How so?" Lara flipped her phone around and held it out as far as she could for Tony to see. The screen was on the website of the hotel they were going to be staying at.

"They have conference rooms available to rent out," she said. "I was thinking once we've had time to settle in, we can use one of these spaces to have our meeting."

"Sounds good," Tony said. "Do it." Lara pulled her phone back close to her.

"I need a time," she said.

"Do after lunch," Tony said. "Like, one or so. If Barton and Romanoff haven't joined us by then, we can give them a quick rundown later."

"Okay." Lara turned her attention back to the screen, intently tapping away. Suddenly, her eyes lit up and she almost jumped out of her seat. "Ooo! It says if I register for a rewards card, I can get a free party cake with the rental of any conference or common room, star restrictions apply."

"What?" Again, Lara held her phone out. Steve, Tony, and Bruce (who had just finished securing the carry-on bags in the overhead bins) leaned in to get a closer look.

"Lara," Bruce said. "I think that the offer is only for kids' birthday parties and things like that." Lara snorted in disbelief.

"What parent is throwing their kid's birthday party at the Hay-Adams Hotel?"

Howard Stark. Technically it wasn't as much a birthday party as it was a political brown-nosing festival, but Tony still got a cake (albeit a small slice of carrot cake) so he supposed that counted.

"Aren't you diabetic anyways?" Bruce asked. "You probably shouldn't be eating cake."

"Probably not," she agreed. "But I can still watch you guys eat cake and feel sorry for myself."

"Conroy, please don't." Lara made a noise of disappointment.

"Fine," she said. "But let it be known that I think it's too good of an opportunity to pass up."

"Sure, it is." Lara scowled in disbelief at Tony's tone but quickly turned her attention back to her phone. Meanwhile, Bruce slid into the seat across from Steve and Tony.

"So why are we going down to D.C. so early?" Bruce asked. "I mean, I know it's to do press, but can't we do that from New York and go down for the State of the Union on Tuesday?"

"The media wants to make a whole spectacle of it," Lara shrugged. "Interviews, parties, yadda, yadda. It's the first time you're all going to be mostly together since New York, too, so that kind of adds to it. Plus, it would probably be easier for Barton and Romanoff to fly out to D.C. and fly back with us than doing a back-and-forth thing."

"Plus, Pepper thought it was a good idea," Tony added.

"Which of course it is," Freeman added from where he was sitting behind them. "The press has been going crazy trying to get interviews and statements from you guys for months. I'm surprised they never tried to break down the doors to Stark Tower with the way they've been constantly calling the PR offices."

"They're probably too afraid of Cabe to try," Tony suggested.

"Or the Jim Jones Fan Club outside…" Lara added under her breath.

"Regardless," Freeman said. "The public wants to get to know the Heroes of New York and all of the media is practically jumping over each other to get dibs on the first interview. If we play this right, this could do an amazing amount of good for both Stark Industries and the Avengers."

…Or sink both ships with one torpedo.

Tony couldn't help but be pessimistic about dealing with the press. Although yes, he was an amazing showman who could have every single person in a room eating out of the palm of his hand, he had numerous public scandals that had left their scars. The worst one was the sex tape that outed him as bisexual. Not only was he not ready to come out publicly at the time, but he also wasn't even fully out of the closet with those closest to him. The only people who had known were Peggy (the only person he had willingly told), Rhodey (who found out after the sock incident), and obviously the men he slept with. The media had drug him through the mud so hard back then that he could still taste dirt in his mouth. Many of his personal and professional relationships had been damaged by it and any time someone had so much as tried to mention it, Tony wanted to throw up. He understood how much power the media held and how easily it could ruin your life.

That was why he and Steve were going to keep their interactions as low-key as possible in front of the press. Steve wasn't ready to come out of the closet yet and Tony knew that if they didn't do it in the right way, the press would rip them to shreds. It was probably best that they didn't take that step right now anyways. After all, they hadn't even been out on a proper date yet.

As Tony started falling down the rabbit hole of worry, the plane's captain's voice came over the intercom, advising all of them to fasten their seatbelts and prepare for takeoff. Tony did as he was told but couldn't help but wonder how long it would take for them to reach cruising altitude, whether anyone would notice if he got a drink at the bar at this early hour, and if they would judge him if they did. He got the feeling that the answer to that last one was yes.


Natasha could see the dirty look the concierge was giving her. Obviously, he didn't condone her putting her socked feet on the pristine couch that sat in the waiting area. Too bad. She was comfortable like this and it felt so good to be comfortable after a needlessly exhausting two-hour flight. Besides, at least she had the courtesy to take off her snow-covered boots first.

Clint sat on the couch next to her – the proper way. His eyes were glued to the screen of the flip phone in his hands. Based on the movements of his thumb across the keypad, she could easily guess that he was texting Laura. Usually, when they were out for work, Clint limited his contact with his wife. He didn't need to be distracted on a mission, after all, and conversely, he didn't need an enemy learning of his family's existence by tracing a phone signal. However, it was different this time. There were no missions to get distracted from or enemies to face. For once, they were working with the minimal need for cautiousness and secrecy.

Just before Christmas, they had gotten a call from Stark. They hadn't heard from him or any of the other Avengers since Coulson's funeral, so they immediately thought that it must be a world-ending catastrophe. Natasha was rushing Laura and the kids down to the Annex and Clint was sprinting to the safe to get their weapons before he had even picked up the phone. However, their alarm had been for naught. Stark was calling them to inform them that the Avengers had been invited to attend the State of the Union. Of course, both Clint and Nat had agreed to go, but if they had known what a circus this was going to be, they would have hesitated a bit more with their answer.

Although they had no problems at the airport, when they arrived at the hotel, they found that there were already a handful of reporters gathered outside, desperate to get the first glimpse at the Avengers in months. Although the front entrance clearly wasn't secure, neither Clint nor Natasha had the cash on them to pay off the cab driver to drop them off out back, so they, unfortunately, had to brave the storm. Getting out of the taxi, the two super-spies sped past the press, covering their faces as best they could and giving "no comment" as their response to any asked questions. That probably wasn't how Stark wanted them to interact with the press, but they considered it better than saying something they shouldn't and having it getting taken out of context later.

Once inside, they made themselves comfortable on the sofa and began to wait for the others to arrive. They texted Stark to let him know that they were there, and he responded that they were still twenty minutes out from D.C. When you figured twenty minutes to fly in, fifteen to get their luggage, and God knows how long to battle the D.C. traffic, it was going to be a bit of a wait. Luckily, Natasha had brought a book and Clint was clearly enthralled with his phone, so they'd managed to kill the time easily, just like everything else.

Natasha was sitting so her back faced the windows that the reporters had gathered in front of. It went against all her training, but she dared not look behind her. She didn't want to give the paparazzi a full, wide view of her face and she wasn't going to. Instead, she kept her mind on her book and ignored the incessant tapping on the glass and the muffled, frenzied shouts of "Hawkeye!" and "Black Widow!" Clint seemed to do the same with his phone.

Eventually, though, Laura must have needed to put the phone down, leaving Clint with nothing to do. He let out a bit of a groan as he stretched out on the couch – which the concierge didn't seem to appreciate, either. He sat there silently for a few moments and Natasha counted down the seconds in her head until he inevitably bothered her.

Five, four, three, two…

"Hey Nat, how long has it been since you texted Stark?"

Bingo.

"I don't know," she shrugged. "Thirty, forty minutes?"

"Shouldn't they be here by now?" Natasha marked the page she was on and set the book down to rest on her stomach.

"They're probably stuck in traffic," she explained. "Since when were you this impatient?"

Clint didn't give an answer and frankly, Natasha didn't expect one. Over the past few months, she had noticed that Clint had been constantly keeping himself busy, mostly by fixing things around the farm and playing with the kids. She had a feeling this was his way of coping. He needed to keep his mind busy, otherwise, he'd have to think about what Loki did to him. Nat didn't think that this was entirely healthy, but at the same time, she couldn't be one to judge. Her way of coping involved running, kicking, and punching; not exactly healthy either.

Reaching over to the small coffee table in front of them, Natasha grabbed the first magazine she saw and tossed it into Clint's lap. He gave the cover a strange look.

"Read that," she said. "That'll keep you occupied."

"Probably not," Clint said, passing the magazine back to her. "But maybe you'll find something interesting here, dear."

Natasha shot Clint a dirty look at the use of the affectionate term he reserved solely for Laura but once she got a look at the cover, she understood why. Although most of the cover was taken up by a picture of one of the Kardashian sisters, a little box in the right-hand corner of the cover had a candid photo of her and Clint walking together, presumably after the Battle of New York given their disheveled appearance and the fact that she could see what looked like Thor behind them. The caption underneath read, "Hawkeye and Black Widow: Avengers Power Couple?" Nat couldn't help it. She burst out laughing, further earning the ire of the concierge.

First, if the Avengers had a power couple, it would be Steve and Tony, hands down. Not that the press would know it, given that Steve was still in the closet about his bisexuality and Tony (for understandable reasons) was respecting that even though Tony probably wanted more than anything to be able to run through the streets, telling the world that he was banging Captain America. Second, the media wouldn't be the first ones to assume that she and Clint were together.

For years it had been a rumor around S.H.I.E.L.D. that she and Clint were a couple. If it got brought up in front of them, they'd calmly correct the person, but for the most part, they just found it funny. Although the list of people that knew it was limited, Clint's heart belonged to Laura and only Laura. He honestly couldn't picture anything else. Natasha, meanwhile…

Well, her heart got left out in the cold a while ago and she highly doubted the person it belonged to would ever come back for it.

Steering her mind away from such dour thoughts, Natasha tossed the magazine back at Clint and nudged him with her foot. He playfully smacked her on the leg, which caused her to respond with further attacks by her feet. Very loudly, the concierge cleared his throat and gave the two of them a stern look. Nat let out a chuckle while Clint pushed her feet out of his lap. She couldn't help but think that what she said to Loki all those months couldn't ring any truer than it was now. Love was for children and she and Clint got on like toddlers at best.

Pulling herself to sit up, Natasha could hear a commotion going on outside. Risking a glance out the window, she could see that most of the press had turned their attention away from them, far more interested in something happening on the street behind them. That could only mean one thing.

"They're here."

Natasha slipped her boots back on and gathered up her book and coat. Clint stood up, straightening out his jacket and pocketing his phone. For a few moments, nothing happened as the calls – mostly for Stark but Nat could hear a few "Hulks" and "Captain Americas" thrown in there – swelled outside. Then the front doors of the hotel opened, and Stark stepped through, blowing a kiss to his adoring public and waving as he left the cameras' view. Beside him was a blonde woman who was wearing what appeared to be a federally-issued windbreaker (Department of Homeland Security, Nat noted from the insignia) and a t-shirt that advertised the band the Veronicas. Steve was quick to follow his boyfriend and Col. Rhodes and Dr. Banner followed behind them. A bald black man and a brunette white woman pulled up the rear. Nat noticed that the brunette paused to scan the crowd before shutting the doors.

Getting up and crossing the room, Stark took notice of Natasha's approach and held open his arms. Nat was slightly surprised to get such a warm welcome, especially from Tony Stark of all people, but she went along with it anyway.

"Romanoff," he said. "We're still calling you that, right?"

"For now," she tried to tease but her tone faded fast. All at once she was hit with the pungent scent of alcohol. It was so strong that she could feel her stomach churn a little bit. She carefully moved so that her lips were right next to his ear and spoke lowly as to not alarm anyone. "It's a little early to be hitting the bottle, don't you think?"

Stark pulled back and frowned. Natasha raised her eyebrows as if to say, "are you going to do something about it?" He shook his head, seemingly pleading no contest before gesturing to the woman next to him.

"Allow me to introduce you to your successor," he said. "Romanoff, this is my assistant, Lara Conroy. Conroy, meet Natalie Rushman." Natasha rolled her eyes and extended a hand out to Conroy.

"Natasha Romanoff," she corrected. "It's a pleasure."

"Likewise," Lara said. "I've heard a lot about you."

"Let me guess," Natasha said. "Mostly Stark bitching me out for spying on him and taking away his boy toy?" Lara grinned.

"Yeah, mostly," she laughed before turning to look behind her. "You know Bruce and Steve obviously."

"Obviously," Natasha agreed before turning to Bruce. "Dr. Banner."

"Agent Romanoff," he said.

"You look well," she commented.

"I'm feeling well, too," He said. "I haven't had an incident since…" Natasha knew what he meant. He didn't need to say anymore.

"Glad to hear it." She turned and saw Rogers finishing up whatever he was saying to Clint, giving him a pat on the shoulder. (Surprisingly, Clint didn't flinch, Natasha noticed.) When Steve looked at her, Nat held her arms out to her fellow Super Soldier. "If I'm hugging one of you, I'm going to hug you both."

Steve stepped forward, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close. Again, Natasha moved her head, so her mouth was close to his ear.

"How much has he had?" Steve didn't seem too shocked at the inquiry.

"He had one glass on the plane," he said. "But I think he had some before we left. I've been pushing water on him, though, and I'm going to make him take a nap as soon as we get to our room." Natasha pulled back and gave Steve a small nod. There was a worry deep in her stomach that there may be something serious going on that mixed with the memories of Stark's "last" birthday bash, but she squashed them down. It had only been two minutes. She needed to observe the situation further before she jumped to any radical conclusions.


A short while later, everyone had gathered in one of the hotel's conference rooms to go over PR strategy. Once everyone got to their seats, it didn't take long for Freeman to get started.

"Alright," the man said with a broad but nonetheless genuine-seeming smile on his face. "Glad to see that everyone could make it. I understand not all of you have too much experience dealing with the public and the media, so we'll try to make it as simple and understandable as possible." The assembled group nodded and made noises of an agreement to that. "Now, before we get started, is there anything any of you think I should be aware of?"

"What do you mean?" Bruce asked.

"Just if there are certain questions you don't want to be asked," Freeman explained. "Something you'd rather keep private, those sorts of things."

Steve was surprised by how fast Tony's had shot up. For a second, Steve worried that he'd say something he shouldn't. Luckily, that ended up being unfounded.

"Steve and I are in a relationship and we'd rather keep it private from the press." Steve relaxed as he heard how even and straightforward Tony's tone was. Maybe that nap had sobered him up a little bit.

"Okay," Freeman held up his hands in a reassuring gesture. "I understand. No judgment, no pressure, but you know you're not going to be able to hide that from the public forever, right?"

"We know," Tony assured. "We just want to keep it to ourselves, for now, right?"

"Right," Steve agreed. Although they hadn't talked about it in depth, he was glad he and Tony were on the same page about how open they wanted to be with their relationship at that point in time. So far, the only people who knew were the other Avengers, Pepper, Rhodey, Happy, Lara, and now Duane Freeman. Steve still had some lingering fears as a result of growing up in the first half of the twentieth century, he was slowly working through it. Having the assurances from the Avengers, War Machine, a former federal agent, and Pepper Potts that anyone who gave them trouble for their sexualities would get messed up helped with that.

"Alright," Freeman agreed. "Anything else you'd like not to be discussed?"

"Just the usual stuff," Tony said. "Other than that, I'm good."

"Me, too," Steve said when Freeman turned his gaze over to him.

"Alright then," Freeman said. "I'll just take note of that."

"And I'll make sure that note is seen by everyone and their mothers," Lara assured.

"Is there anything else anyone wants to disclose? Speak now or forever hold your peace." Steve didn't miss the pointed look Freeman gave Natasha and Clint and neither of the spies missed it either.

"You don't have to give us that look," Natasha said.

"What look?"

"The one that says, 'I know you both have shady pasts, so just come out with the worst of it already." Freeman didn't argue with Clint. In fact, he looked a little embarrassed.

"I'm sorry," he said rather honestly. "I don't mean to pry or accuse you in any way…"

"But you know we're the problem children who could mess this all up," Clint finished. "Tell me I'm wrong."

"No," Freeman assured. "I'm doing this to protect you. If there's something you don't want to talk about, now's the time to say something."

"Wouldn't that be counterintuitive?" Bruce asked. "I mean, the whole point of talking to the press is to show the public that they can trust us to keep them safe. How can we do that if we're lying to them and avoiding certain topics?"

"No one is lying," Freeman said before Lara cut in.

"It isn't an issue of trust," she explained. "It's just an issue of each of your own personal comfort levels. If there's something that if asked about would cause you emotional distress, we need to know about it so we can tell the reporters not to bring it up.

"That won't stop them from going off script," Natasha pointed out.

"No, it won't," Lara admitted. "But it gives us grounds to raise hell with the corporate offices."

"Right," Freeman agreed. "That's why if there is something you don't want to be asked about, you have to tell us now." Clint and Natasha exchanged quick looks with each other.

"There isn't anything I can think of," Clint said. Natasha shrugged.

"I'm a master manipulator," she said. "If there's something I don't want to talk about, I can deflect without anyone even noticing." Freeman seemed satisfied with that and turned his attention over to Bruce.

"The worst thing I've done was destroy Harlem," he said. "The public already knows about that, so it's not really like I have anything to hide." Freeman nodded.

"If that's all," he said. "Don't say I didn't warn you."

Freeman looked like he was going to say something else when the conference room door suddenly opened. Inside stepped six singing hotel employees, one of them carrying a small sheet cake.

"When you've grown up my dears

And are as old as I

You'll often ponder of the years

That roll so swiftly by…"

"Whoa," Tony said, cutting the choir off. "What is this? Why are you singing?"

"Wait," one of the singers said. "Isn't this supposed to be where the birthday party is?" All gazes turned to Lara.

"I swear on my life I hit 'cancel' on that rewards card," she stressed. "Anyways, what the hell kind of birthday song is that?"

"The kind that's in the public domain," the hotel employee holding the cake said. They set the plate down in the center of the conference table. "Anyways, the Hay-Adams hotel wishes our honored guest, Geena Davis, a wonderful day on this, her fifty-sixth birthday." The employees then promptly filed out of the room. Tony shot Lara a sharp look.

"Geena Davis? Really?" Lara shrugged.

"The site needed a name and IMDb said it was her birthday…"

Seeing as the cake was already paid for, no one saw any harm in digging into it anyways. Steve was glad when he saw Tony reach for a piece. Sugar probably wasn't the best thing to throw on top of alcohol, at least he was getting food in him. The rest of the meeting went smoothly with mostly everyone enjoying the cake (though, it came off as too sweet to those with enhanced senses), Lara looking at the food longingly, and Freeman going over the basic dos and don'ts of interacting with the press. They finished up in just under two hours and as they walked back to their room, Steve began to try to talk Tony into taking another nap.


Thank you to Queen E for leaving kudos on AO3! It really means a lot! :)

Given that this was an ultra-long chapter (made by stitching the remains of two smaller chapters together) I'm not going to put too much in the way of this authors note. If you like, please favorite, follow, review, comment, and/or subscribe.

Remember kids, if you're a vampire like me, you should never go out into the sun.


Originally posted to FFN on 6/21/19.