It took some time for the meaning to sink in. I tried to study Cato's face as I make sense of Claudius' words, trying to read the emotions running through his face, but there were so many and they were so fast I couldn't make them out, except one. That one emotion, I could read loud and clear, because that's the one emotion I'm feeling right now. Hope. We could go home. Together. We wouldn't have to kill each other and live with the guilt and the pain for the rest of our lives. Because I know that if I kill Cato to get out of the arena, I'll never be the same again. I'll never get over the nightmares I'll have after the arena. I'll have to spend the rest of my life trying to keep myself sane. Considering that, dying here sounds like a much easier, better option. But Claudius has saved us, for once, the game-makers has made a move that has given us hope.
When Cato's face ran out of emotions, it broke into a smile, a genuine smile. I've never seen him smile like that before. The smile and the light from the fire lit up his face. He looked more than relief, he looked happy. And that's a lot because in the district, we hardly ever have any reasons to be happy. I smiled back at him, relief coursing through me. We never have to touch the dreaded subject.
He looks like he wanted to say a lot of things but he just said, "Good, we don't have to kill each other then!"
He came to my side and lie down on his back. I wanted to tell him how relief I was, but I'm afraid that if I say the words out loud, it would all go away, the hope, our only hope. I want to hang onto it until we know that we wouldn't need it anymore, until we are safe. Because it still sounds impossible. If we get out of here, we have the rest of our lives to talk. To talk about anything. So I lay down on my back too and we spent the rest of the night watching the sky.
The next time we hear Claudius' voice, he's inviting us to a feast in the Cornucopia. Meaning, he's inviting us to a bloodbath. It will be our chance to take out our strongest competitors. At the moment, it would be Thresh and Katniss. If we take them out, Peeta and Fox-face won't be a problem. So Cato and I made plans.
Since I cannot tackle Thresh, we decided that while I tackle Katniss, Cato will go after Thresh. It took a lot for Cato to give up Katniss to me. But I convinced him that I won't let him down. Besides it's our best bet.
"Okay, she's yours. Give the audience a good show," he said finally.
"I will," I promised giving him his smirk.
The day of the feast, we decided to set off for the Cornucopia just before dawn. We would have to separate. As I wait for Katniss over at the Cornucopia, Cato will go confront Thresh. We would have to keep an eye out for Fox-face too but we don't think Peeta will be in any position to come out front.
"Ok, I'll meet you here afterwards then," said Cato holding me with an intense gaze.
"Right." I nodded. My heart is beating fast, if we succeed in taking Katniss and Thresh out today, we are almost out of this.
I turned and started to walk, still feeling slightly nervous.
"Clove" called Cato.
I turned and he said, "Aim well, don't miss your target" he said.
"I won't. You make it quick, don't hold out on Thresh" I told him.
So we set off and I waited for Katniss out in the Cornucopia. But it was Fox-face who came out first and made a sprint for the bag with her district no. on it. I had to let her go. If I confront her, I would lose out on Katniss and I cannot afford that. As fox-face makes her way out of the Cornucopia, Katniss dash in, running straight for the bag meant for her. I took after her, aiming my knife right for her neck, she deflected it with her bow. She turned and reached for her arrow, I aimed another one and it hit right at her forehead above her eyebrows. I bore down on her, dragging her to the ground. We struggled for a while but I 'm on her again and I'm thinking how to give the audience a good show.
"I promised Cato if he let me have you, I'd give the audience a good show," I told her, pressing both her hands onto the ground.
"We are going to kill you. Just like we did your pathetic little ally." I said.
She's struggling to get me off her but that's not going to happen until I'm done with her. I need to get this over with. Just as I brought down my knife on her, I felt a tug and the next thing I knew, someone is pulling me off Katniss, powerful arms wrapped around me and pushed me to the ground. Thresh. What is he doing here? Cato must have gone the wrong way to find him. Thresh is so strong, I couldn't move a muscle under his arms, I felt helpless. I tried to fight but it's no use, he is too strong for me. There's no way I could fight him.
"Did you kill Rue, was it you?" he asked.
"No, no it wasn't me." I cried.
Then I saw the stone in his hand, the size of a loaf of bread. He's going to kill me any second.
"Cato! Cato!" I called out, terrified.
"Clove!" I heard him answer but he is too far away. He would never make it here in time.
As I watched Thresh raise the stone, all the plans and hope we had had since coming inside the arena flashed through my mind and they crumbled down and vanished in front of me. Thresh brought down the stone hard against my skull. I couldn't see or feel for a few seconds, my mind went numb, taking some time to register the pain. And then I felt it, the pain, so intense that I couldn't even scream.
"Clove!" I heard Cato's pained voice. He is near now, maybe near enough to see me.
Thresh released me, knowing that he had done his job and ran towards the bags. And then I saw Cato rush towards me in a daze, not even bothering to go for Thresh or Katniss, who have been watching me. His face is constricted in pain as he took me in. I felt the warmth of the blood flowing from my head on my face and neck. The pain vibrates through my brain, my whole body, and I'm screaming inside but I couldn't make a sound. Everything around me is a blur. I felt Cato's arms around me, trying to lift my head. His hands trembled as he fumbles through my head, looking at the damage.
"Clove! Stay with me. Stay with me!" he begged. At that moment, I realized that all our plans and hopes were vain; we were never going to make out of the arena. Not us. Not together. It had sounded impossible even then, because it was impossible. We were never going home together.
"We were supposed to go home together. You can't die." His voice is resigned; he must know that there is no way I could survive this. No amount of medicine any sponsor could think of could undo the damage Thresh did to my skull.
He is crying now, tears streaming down his face, hitting mine. And as I watch him cry, I felt a pang, regret that we would never get to know each other. I would never get to know his other self, the not-so-dangerous Cato, the one I saw a glimpse of when he had slept in the woods just a few days ago. We would never get to talk about anything apart from strategies. I saw him volunteer again in my mind, his blank face. I never got to ask; I will never know what it meant.
"Please don't die! Don't leave me here alone!"
I wish I could say something, anything, but I couldn't think of anything, and it seems futile at the moment. All I could do is look at him. I feel numb. The pain is gone. I know that Cato is right here with me but I saw and hear him like from a dream. Tears streamed down my face as I watch Cato begging me to stay alive, that's one thing I won't be able to do.
And as I drifted into oblivion, the last thought in my mind was wanting Cato to get out of here and away from this place, for him to never feel the pain I felt, for him to go home and be safe.
[ Hope you liked it. Thanks for the reviews and thanks for reading.]
