Itachi Must Die!... A series of short stories involving swift, nonsensical demises for Uchiha Itachi under completely ridiculous and even retarded circumstances. Occasional Sasuke+Sakura.

---------- Omake 03: The Eyes of Itachi ----------

It was a glum day in Konohagakure. Itachi had returned yet again, and Sasuke had appeared out of seemingly nowhere to challenge him. Though the younger Uchiha boy had fought fiercely, he had fallen as expected and was now at his elder brother's mercy.

Itachi was currently straddling Sasuke's waist, a kunai raised and poised to strike. There was no hope remaining for Sasuke it seemed -- it was over.

Just when it seemed that all was lost, Sasuke closed his eyes to concentrate. An idea screamed to make itself known in his mind, and soon enough his eyes snapped open in determination. Focusing much of his chakra into his hand, he thrust it upwards with two fingers extended to attack Itachi's one(or two) weaknesses!

Unfortunately for the younger Uchiha, Itachi raised a hand to catch his fingers, stopping their ascent to his precious Sharingan embued eyes. He frowned in disapproval of his brother's useless attempts.

"Not good enough, foolish little brother..." he said as he gripped Sasuke's neck in his hands. However, before he had the chance to strangle the life from Sasuke, Naruto and Sakura came at him from either side, each jabbing a single finger into both of his eyes. Itachi screamed in agony as the two stepped back, his head reeling back and his hands shooting up to cover his eyes.

"NOOOO! My precious SHARINGAN! NOOOO!" he yelled, several agonized screams following. Without his eyes, he had no desire to live...

Itachi had been defeated.

But it wasn't over yet. Taking the presented opportunity, Sasuke quickly performed the seals neccessary for the Chidori before shoving said attack up through Itachi's left chest.

Pulling his hand back out, Sasuke managed to kick his brother off of him, picking himself up and dusting himself off. An overly emotional Sakura lept into his arms then, greatly confusing the young Uchiha. He shrugged.

"Itachi's dead now, so what the hell?" he sighed in defeat before wrapping an arm around Sakura's shoulders much to the pink haired girl's joy; they then walked back into the village's gates with Naruto close behind talking about ramen and how hungry he had gotten in that fearsome encounter...

Soon after, a familiar shark-faced man happened across Itachi's fallen body and fell to his knees beside it. Tears spilled unrealistically from his eyes as a sudden high pitched scream next came from his mouth.

"Itachi-chan, WHY?" he cried out, the fluffy pillows called clouds in the brilliant blue sky above just passing him by carelessly. He sniffled as he checked Itachi's pulse, only to discover that he indeed was very, very dead. "Noooooooo!" Kisame sobbed into his companion's chest.

It was by mere chance that the one and only Hyuuga Neji happened by. He glanced at Itachi and Kisame, immediately recognizing them as S-rank criminals, and with a nicely placed palm strike over the shark man's heart, Kisame crumpled forward over his beloved friend's body, also dead.

Neji shook his head before stuffing his hands in his pockets and continuing on his way.

"So much for that."

---------- Owari: The End ----------

Note: Every two chapters, Itachi will be killed by the Chidori in a relatively different way each time.

Disclaimer & Copyright Information: I do not own Naruto (© Kishimoto Masashi); however, I am the author of this story. If you have comments or suggestions, leave a review or send me an e-mail. Doumo arigatou, for reading my writing!