"House! What the hell did you do to me!" Cuddy screams between contractions. The moment they have been waiting on for the last nine months was finally here. On Christmas day, nonetheless. A baby by the world's most unbalanced couple was making his entrance.

"Nothing that you didn't ask for." House says with his arms posing in a state of defense.

They were in a delivery room of the hospital. Cuddy has been in labor for three hours and was only seven centimeters dilated and her contractions were coming fast and hard.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Cuddy asks out of breath. House moves toward Cuddy and wipes the sweat from her forehead with a cloth.

"Meaning, you wanted a life sucking parasite. So, don't get mad at me for giving you want you wanted."

"That's our son you're talking about!" Cuddy says slapping him on the forearm.

"That's why I say it with the most love." He says right before she has another contraction. House holds her hand as she squeezed his hand back.

"God, Cuddy, I think you broke my finger." House complains after the contraction is over. He shakes his hand to rid the pain and flexes his pinky finger.

"I did it with the most love." She retorts tiredly as she lays her head back on the hospital pillow. She pulls back up to reach for her cup of ice chips, only it was empty when she picked it up.

"House..." She shakes the cup, signaling it needs to be refilled. House, who had just plopped down in the chair, sighs, rubs his right thigh and gets back up. He limps over and grabs the cup and heads to the door.

Cuddy, noticing his profound limp, stops him. "You should take your cane." House opens his mouth to refuse, but she cuts him off. "I know you're in pain and it's understandable, I'm putting a lot of stress on you with this labor, but, will you be able to make it down the hall without your cane?"

"I don't need my cane. And able?" He stops and feigns pondering. "Let's find out." He leaves the room without his cane. Cuddy rolls her eyes.

A few minutes later, House comes strolling in and Cuddy's Ob/Gyn, Dr. John Smith, was not far behind him. House hands Cuddy the cup of ice chips.

"Okay, let's take a look." Dr. Smith checks Cuddy's progress. "Hmm..." He says. He stands up and moves toward the ultrasound machine.

"What is it?" Cuddy inquires. She studies the doctor's moves with a worried expression.

"It seems," Dr. Smith squirts the gel on Cuddy's abdomen, "that baby boy," He rubs the wand around until a picture shows, "has breeched." He turns the screen towards Cuddy so she can confirm.

"How is that possible? He was fine last week." Cuddy asks.

"Well," He pauses, "it happens. What we're going to have to do now..."

"You don't need our informed consent." House cut in. "We're doctors, we know what comes next. A caesarean." Dr. Smith eyes House before reluctantly agreeing. He can't stand Dr. House.

"Right. I'll be back and we can head to the OR." Once Dr. Smith leaves the room, Cuddy turns towards House.

"I really wanted to have a natural vaginal birth."

"That's lines in the sand, now. The baby breeched." He says as affectionately as he can while running his fingers along her arm. "You can still have a vaginal birth, but it's very high risk and your pregnancy was high risk as it is. And I was never all that great at logical reasoning, but I'm pretty sure high risk on high risk isn't a good risk to take."

"Hello, Dr. Cuddy. OR's ready." One of the three nurses says as she came into the room. Cuddy turns to House again.

"I love you."

"Yeah, we're fools for love." He leans down and kisses her. "I'll see you in the OR after I scrub." He kisses her again. The nurses wheel Cuddy out of the room.

[H] [H] [H] [H]

"Number eight scalpel." One of the OR nurses hands Dr. Smith the instrument needed.

"I hope he has your eyes." Cuddy says to House as they hold hands. Like 95% of C-Sections, Cuddy is on a Regional anesthesia. It is preferred as it allows the mother to be awake and interact immediately with her baby. "And your boldness."

"Whatever happens, happens. Que sera sera." He says to her. House takes a look behind the curtain and scrunches up his face. "I've seen all kinds of operations. But this one is different. It makes me a little nauseous." He smiles teasingly at her.

"You looked like you were going to faint." Cuddy replies, weakly, from all the pain meds she's on.

"Nah," House starts, "I wouldn't want our kid to be known as son of coma guy." Cuddy lets out another fragile laugh. "I might not be able to run and play catch with him, but I can teach him how to play the hell out of a pinball machine, foosball... whac-a-mole, or whatever the hell these kids play today."

"You'll make a great dad." Cuddy states, seriously. She squeezes his hand in reassurance.

"You know he's going to suck all the fun out of our lives, right? This birth is like finding Judas. You think he's on your side and then, BAM, he tries to take over."

"House..."

"Here comes baby." Dr. Smith's words breaks the parents-to-be out of their conversation. The nurses lower the curtains so Cuddy can see this part, while House moves closer. The doctor carefully retrieves the baby. The nurses quickly suctions the baby's nose.

"Congratulations. It's a healthy baby boy." He says behind his mask. "Dr. House, would you like to do the honor?" He asks holding up a pair of scissors.

House smiles brightly and gladly takes the scissors from the good doctor. After he cuts, the nurses takes the baby and moves him to the incubator, while the doctors and other nurses remove the placenta and begin to stitch Cuddy.

The nurses tap baby House on the behind and he quickly the room fills with his cries. Cuddy and House let out a breath of air, happy that their high-risk pregnancy went through without a hitch.

"Nineteen inches." A nurse says. She also takes the circumference of his head. "Six pounds, five ounces." She finishes. They swaddle him and hand him to Cuddy. The doctors finish the suturing.

"Well isn't he a merry little Christmas?" The nurse, who handed Cuddy the baby, says with a smile on her face. House eyes her and scowls.

"Hey, that was my line. Get lost." The young new nurse quickly flees the delivery room. The last nurse standing speaks to the new family.

"We'll be back in about five minutes to move you to the birthing rooms in the maternity ward. There, we'll bring you birth certificate papers, etcetera, etcetera. Pretty much all words and deeds."

The nurse leaves. Cuddy faces House, baby in her arms. "One day, one room, eh?"

"Technically, we've been in about four or five rooms since the day started..." Cuddy glares at House. "...but I understand the metaphor." House looks at his son. "So we still have four names; we have to pick two."

"It's not really a needle in a haystack. It's either Gregory Jr..."

"No."

"...or Gregory is his middle name." House smacks his lips and rolls his eyes, dramatically.

"Are you really gonna stick him with that name?" He asks.

"Why are you so sensitive about the name. It is your name." She tries to understand.

"Why are you so insensitive about me not liking it. Your, right. It is my name; he can't have it."

"House..." Cuddy says getting annoyed.

"See, he already gets my last name. You took my last name too, by the way. I'm sure he wouldn't want my full name." House looks down at his now sleeping son, again. "Can I hold him?"

"Oh." Cuddy says, almost shocked with herself. She didn't realize she was hogging the kid. "Yeah." She hands him their son. She watches House watch the baby. She sees it in his eyes. Love.

"Stop staring." House says while still gazing at the boy. He can feel her gaze upon him.

"Stop being a half wit. Most guys love when their son carries their name." She says coming out of her reverie.

"I'm not most guys." House reminds her.

"I know..." She says mostly to herself. Three nurses comes back into the room as promised.

"Okay guys." She takes the baby from House and puts him into his crib. "We are headed around the corner." Two nurses push the hospital bed while the other pushes the crib. House walks along side Cuddy.

"I've got a name." House says out of the blue. The nurses all look back at him simultaneously. This was big hospital gossip as well as part of the betting pool. House rolls his eyes at the nurses. "It's top secret, though." He bends down and whisper it in Cuddy's ear.

"I like that." The nurses let out a disappointed sigh. House smirks. They reach the room and the nurse hooks Cuddy back up to the heart monitor. The family of three is left alone again. That is until Wilson barges in.

"I missed it all!" Wilson exclaims. "House, why didn't you call me? Cuddy?" Wilson glances back and forth between the married couple with his hands on his hips.

"I thought he called you. I'm sorry, Wilson." Cuddy glares at House. She told him to call Wilson when she went into labor early that morning.

"How did you find out anyway?" House inquired.

"News travel fast around here. I heard the fetal position switched at the last minute."

"The gossip is airborne in this hospital. It's contagious." Cuddy says tired and exasperated. House eyes his wife.

"Cuddy, you should get some sleep. You've been through a lot today." Cuddy goes to disagree but yawns instead.

"Wait, before you check out on me, What's his name?" Wilson asks causing House to smirk at him.

"I know something you don't know." House sticks his tongue out at Wilson. Wilson rolls his eyes and drops his arms out of his superman pose.

"Act your age, House."

"I'm not telling you." House retorts. Wilson sighs hard and turns to Cuddy.

"Cuddy..." Wilson starts but Cuddy is asleep. Wilson sighs again knowing he won't get the answer from House. Wilson turns back towards House, who's staring at the baby.

"This guy is going to need some house training." House holds his finger out to the baby's small fist. The baby quickly latches on to his daddy's finger. House looks up at Wilson and gives him a genuine smile. "Get it... House training."

Wilson smiles and pats House on the back. "Congratulations on the new family member. Whatever his name is." He smiles and walks out the room.

"He needs to hand in his oncology resignation and become a full time feminist." House says to his son. He receives a gummy smile in return. House smiles back.

"You know I'm not the jerk everyone thinks I am." House thinks awhile. "Well at least not to Cuddy and I definitely won't be one to you." House slides his thumb across his son's tiny hand. He was still clutching to House's finger.

"You are most definitely not a human error, Andrew Gregory House."

I'm going to try to find my muse for 'Life is A Vacation?'

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