Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight Saga or any of the characters' belonging to it. The Twilight Saga in it's entirety belongs rightfully to Stephenie Meyer.
Author's note: I'm sorry for the slow build up! But I'm going somewhere with this... I promise!
Chapter Three - The Scars
Conversation did not flow easily between Emily and I. To be honest, I didn't know what to say. So I merely watched her as she pottered about the kitchen, cleaning up after the mess the boys had made.
After a while the silence became too much to bear.
"Can I help with something?" I asked quietly.
Emily immediately stopped what she was doing, she dropped the kitchen towel on the side and faced me. Her arms were crossed and I regretted saying anything at all.
"Yes." She said, "You can tell me something."
I held my breath anxiously.
"What are you doing? With Jake, I mean." She demanded. "He's risking his life for you. He loves you, I think. Do you even care?"
I winced. I knew how this all must seem, it would look as though I was using Jacob to fill the void inside of me. Like I was using his light to make myself just a little brighter. Like I was leading him on.
And wasn't I?
I knew how he felt about me, yet I kept doing this to him...I kept coming back.
But I needed him. I loved him, just maybe not in the way he wanted me too.
Not yet anyway.
Emily's eyes narrowed at me and I knew exactly what she saw. She saw a spoilt, selfish little girl and she was right - that's exactly what I was.
"Of co-course I care." I stuttered. "I care about Jacob very much and I don't want to hurt him..." My voice trailed away into nothingness. Maybe I should leave him alone. It wasn't fair on him.
Emily sat down at the kitchen table and sighed. "Of course, it's none of my business." She said, "But they're my family now and I feel very protective of those boys."
Hesitantly, I sat down opposite her. Throughout this entire conversation I hadn't even noticed the jagged scars that ran down her face. I was wrong before, I thought, her scars didn't make her ugly...if anything they highlighted the beauty she had.
"What I'm saying is..." She continued, "Be careful with him." She regarded me with her dark, soulful eyes and I nodded.
She made us drinks and after that conversation passed more easily between us, although I could tell she was still wary of me. I didn't blame her. I hoped that she would warm to me eventually though, I liked Emily. She was open and honest...a part of me wished I could be more like her.
Eventually the topic of James and Victoria came up.
"So your vampire, Edward, killed her mate James then, did he?" She asked.
To my surprise, I didn't flinch at the sound of his name.
"Yeah, when James realized what I meant to...the Cullens..." Just because I could hear his name didn't mean I wanted to say it. "He went out of his way to kill me. It was a game for him. He came close to winning as well." I held up my hand that bore the white, ice-cold scar from my encounter. Emily gasped.
"You got bitten!" She exclaimed.
I nodded glumly. "They had to suck the venom out."
She leaned back in her chair, awe and terror mingled in her expression. Then she laughed darkly. "We both have scars then."
"Did we really expect anything else when we agreed to hang out with mythological creatures?" I mused.
She flashed a grin at me and then held up her coffee cup. "To scars and mythological creatures." She said.
Cautiously I lifted my cup to meet hers. "To scars and mythological creatures." I said.
We sipped our drinks and silence passed between us again but this time it wasn't uncomfortable at all. I smiled to myself and thought maybe, just maybe, I had made a friend here today.
...
Jacob and his brothers arrived early evening. By that time, Emily and I had already prepared all the food.
Jacob grinned at me when he came in, and once again I was stunned by how very bright his smile was.
We all ate dinner together. It was a loud and rowdy affair. The brothers spoke at length of their adventures as wolves and Emily would occasionally chime in to scold them for their reckless behaviour.
Jacob sat beside me, occasionally he would gently place his hand on my leg reassuringly. Makings sure I was okay. A week or so ago it would have bothered me, but for some unfathomable reason it didn't.
Eventually dinner finished and one by one members of the pack left, either to patrol or go home and get some sleep.
Jake escorted me to my truck.
"Are you sure you don't want me to take you home?" He asked nervously.
I laughed, "I'm not that helpless Jacob!"
He looked at me as though he wasn't so sure but hanged the topic anyway. "I'm patrolling tonight but that means I'll be free tomorrow. That is, if you would like to see me?"
The uncertainty in his voice surprised me. "Of course I would Jacob!"
He practically gleamed at me and took my hand. "We'll I'll try and think of something to do." He said, "I think the motorbikes are on the back burner for the moment though, Bells."
I nodded in agreement. Motorbikes definitely were not on top of my to-do list right now.
"I'll try and think of something too." I said. After all, he couldn't be the only one putting an effort into this relationship...or whatever this was.
He grinned and did something that took me completely aback. He kissed my forehead.
"Drive safely, Bella." He mumbled, his cheeks flushing red. And then he turned hastily back to Emily's cabin.
I gently brushed my fingers over my cheeks. My own skin was hot. I was blushing too.
Trying not to think of what this might mean, I turned the keys in the truck and made my journey back home.
When I got there, I noticed Charlie had already gone to bed. He still wasn't right after what happened to Harry. I couldn't blame him.
I tip-toed to my room and sat on the bed for a moment. My eyes slowly roamed over everything that was there, and I realised that nothing had changed in the last six months.
My room had remained exactly the same as he last saw it. Not one thing had moved.
Like me.
Except... Except I had changed - or I was beginning to at least. Shouldn't my room reflect that?
An idea struck me then. I knew exactly what Jacob and I could do tomorrow.
I curled up in bed and pulled the quilt over my face and I knew that the nightmares would not be quite as strong tonight.
Because some scars were visible and some scars weren't. But of one thing I was now certain - all scars could eventually heal.
