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Chapter 3: Of Songs and Scarecrows

"Follow the yellow shifting staircase. Follow… the…" I pause. Wonderful. The staircase splits off into two different paths. "NOW which way do I go?"

"Why, if I could see the road signs, then I could tell you which way to go."

I whirl around in surprise. There isn't another soul in sight. "Who said that?" All I can see is an oddly placed scarecrow.

"Although, I HAVE heard that that way over there is fairly pleasant," the same voice answers.

Where on earth is that voice coming from?! I glance at the scarecrow again. No… there's no way. But maybe…? I mean, this place IS pretty weird. "Don't be silly, Draco. Scarecrows don't talk," I sigh to myself.

"Of course people DO go BOTH ways," the scarecrow animatedly throws his arms in both directions.

"AHA! So it WAS you!" I start walking closer to him. He looks… oddly familiar. Wait. Is that… "Potter?"

He grins. "Close. The name's Spotter. Scarey Spotter. Get it? Scarey? Because I'm a scarecrow."

"Clearly. How clever your parents must have been to have come up with such a golden name for you," I scoff. "So how did you get lucky enough to get stuck up there?" I point to the wooden pole that he's attached to.

He grimaces and turns around to sigh at the pole that's holding him captive. "Pranksters," he replied. "Gred and Forge Teasley thought it'd be so ha ha hilarious to steal my glasses AGAIN and stick me up on… on… oh, WHATEVER is that I'm on! They told me to do my job and scare the crows away but my problem is that, without my glasses, I can't see a darn thing!"

"Ah, well here, let me help you."

"Oh that's very kind of you."

"Don't mention it. Seriously, don't." I walk around behind him and look for whatever it is that's holding him up. I find a nice, sturdy nail and I reach up to bend it, hoping that it would just release him, but it won't budge. What am I supposed to do now? I didn't bring a hammer with me. I can't just… oh. I'm so slow. Hello? I'm a wizard. I shake my head and force myself to not give into the desire to deliver a nice facepalm to my forehead. I pull my wand out and wave it, expecting the nail to come loose and release Potter. Spotter. WhatEVER. It still hasn't moved. Not even the tiniest bit. I wave my wand again. Nothing. Is this thing even on? How is my wand not working? Impossible!

Ding. Lightbulb! Didn't Luna say something about the ruby wand being able to resist other charms and things that are supposed to prevent normal magic from being used? Well, only one way to find out.

I pull the ruby wand out and wave it over the nail. Works like a charm. (Pun intended.) I know. I'm amazing.

Potter falls down quickly, courtesy of gravity. He's stumbling all over the place, losing straw all the while, the unfortunate fool.

"Whoops!" he cries out. "There goes some of me again!"

I watch in fascination. He's now crawling all over the ground, blindly groping around for the missing straw. " Does that hurt?" I ask.

"Oh, no. I just keep picking it up and putting it back in again!"

A crow land right next to his hand, settling into a pile of straw. He doesn't seem to see it at all. The crow jumps around before deciding to fly up onto Potter's shoulder.

"Hey!" he yells. "Get off of me! I know you're there- I can feel you!"

The crow squawks and pecks at Potter's straw hat, mockingly and flies away.

Potter sighs loudly and slumps down, defeated. "You see how they mock me? I can't even properly see them to scare them away. Oh, I'm a failure! And all because I don't have a pair of contacts! None of this would have ever happened if I only had contacts."

"Contacts? You want… contacts?" I ask slowly.

"Absolutely! Why, if I had contacts, I could…" He begins to sing.

"I could while away the hours, looking at the flowers and watchin' all the rain.

No more potions I'd be botchin', cuz my eyes were busy watchin',

If I only had good sight.

I'd be solvin' any puzzle for wizards, or for muggles that couldn't get them right.

All the views would be so freeing, I could even go sightseeing,

If I only had good sight.

Oh I could tell you where the ocean meets the shore.

I could show you things you've never seen before.

And then I'd sit- and see some more.

I would not be just all stuffin',

My eyes just seein' nuffin',

My heart all full of spite.

I could read every passage, I could find my missing baggage,

If I only had good sight!"

Oh thank Merlin. Thank all the good things of the world. He's done singing. I thought he'd never stop. His song was MUCH longer than Loony's. Well, I don't want to seem rude. I better smile… "Um… what a… nice song. Congratulations," I finish awkwardly. "Well, you're free from that pole now and this has been a real hoot and all, but I really must be getting to the Foreboding Forest now and it was such a pleasure to meet you. So good luck with your… problem… Later, mate."

As I'm about to make a run for it, Potter exclaims "Wait!" I turn back to him, slowly.

"Did you say the Foreboding Forest?" he asks. I nod. Oi, me and my big mouth. Please don't ask to come PLEASE don't ask to come!

"Well I actually need to go that way, to get to the spectacular Wizard of Hogz! I'm going to ask him to give me a pair of contacts. Do you mind if I tag along with you? I'll be really quiet- you won't even know I'm there!"

"I really don't-"

"Oh, please! Please let me come with you! Please please please please PLEASE!"

Hmm… Potter begging me? I like it. "Fine," I huff. "But it's up to you to keep up. I'll not be searching for you, should you decide to wander off or get left behind. I have a strict schedule to keep. You got that?"

"Oh, yes! I've got it, yes sir!"

"Right. Well let's get a move on then, yeah?"

He nods vigorously, his hat dangerously close to toppling right off. Then he takes a few very enthusiastic steps… in the wrong direction.

"Potter?" I call. "You're going the wrong way. This way."

He grins sheepishly. "Oh right! Oh and actually, my name's Spotter- not Potter," he reminds me.

"Whatever. I'm Draco Malfoy."

"Nice to meet you, Draco."

"Um… Spotter?
"Mm?"
"Don't call me Draco. Just call me Malfoy, all right? It kinda creeps me out when you call me Draco."

"Malfoy, sure. Got it! But why?"

"You remind me of someone I know. We aren't exactly on a first name basis."

"Why not? Don't you like your name?"

"Of course I do. We just do it because… because… it's just what we do, okay! Now stop asking so many questions!" So much for 'you won't even know I'm there!'

"Of course. Now onward and upward!" he cries out, pointing at the yellow shifting staircase.

I really hope we're going the right way…

As I was thinking that, he starts to sing again.

"OOOOHHHHHH, we're off to see the wizard the wonderful Wizard of Hogz!

We hear he is a whiz of a wiz if ever a Wiz there was!

If ever, oh ever, a Wiz there was, the Wizard of Hogz is one because

Because because because because BECAAAAAAUUUUUUSEEEE!

Because of the wonderful things he does!

We're off to see the wizard! The wonderful Wizard of Hooooooggggzzzzz!"

I groan. Why did I agree to let him come with me again? Maybe because I feel bad for being such a jerk to the real Potter? Nah. Maybe it's because this one is so dangerously close to being blinder than a bat, that I just feel compelled to help him. I feel a little protective of him. Huh. I wonder if the real Potter is near blind without his glasses too?

Questions for another time and another day. If I can only make it through all these musical numbers. I can't help but think that Luna and Spotter aren't the ONLY ones with a song in their heart. And that terrifies me like nothing else ever has before.

A/N: Hey guys, I'm back with another chapter for ya! I apologize for taking so long to update! I don't have internet at home, so I have to go to the library or somewhere else that has wifi.

On a slightly different note, I was wondering how everyone was enjoying, or not enjoying this story so far! No amount of words or thanks could be expressed well enough to those that review or favorite or follow, but I'll thank you anyway! Thank you so much, guys. You seriously make me deliriously happy!

A very special thank you to DracoLover and Guest, for your reviews. I am thrilled that you are eager to know what happens next!

Lastly, if anyone has any ideas or requests for this story, I'd be happy to hear them. Review or PM me any time and I'll get back to you as quickly as I can!

Until next chapter! Follow the yellow shifting staircase!