So, chapter three, yay.

See Disclaimer on Chapter 1


"Normal"

Thought


Gringotts, Snarlgrip's Office

"So, now that we have determined what money has been stolen from me and by whom, let us find out what else has been taken from me." I grin out, plans of revenge forming in my head.

I wonder what the comparative acerbic qualities of basilisk venom are versus sulfuric acid. Perhaps I should test this by dunking one leg each of a certain Greasy Git into vats of each.

"Well, Mr Potter, this ledger should contain a listing of every item, stock or share, property, contract, or even debts owed the family." said Snarlgrip, "Though the item list is likely not a full account, it should hold all items of monetary, emotional, magical, or historical value. So, while it might not contain a listing for your father's socks, it will contain his Auror's uniform and the robes he wore to his wedding."

"Perfect, can we go about finding out where these items are?" I ask, "this will no doubt take a while, so why not turn to another topic. There were some other names mentioned in my list of possible guardians, what happened to them?" I ask, knowing the answer.

"Well, in reverse order, Lupin was ineligible due to laws stating that a werewolf could not be the guardian of any non-were magical child. Mrs Longbottom and her husband were tortured into a catatonic state mere days after the deaths of your own parents. Coincidentally, this left their own son to be raised by the boy's paternal grandmother, the Dowager Longbottom. Finally, Sirius Black," here Snarlgip paused to rub at his wrinkled forehead, "Mr Black is currently imprisoned at the island prison of Azkaban. Due to my own belief that you were to go to him after your parents' deaths, I followed the story closely, and also gathered as much as I could on what happened. It seems, that after that night, Black and another of your parents friends, one Peter Petigrew, confronted each other in a muggle street that ended in the death of Petigrew and twelve muggles along with a giant hole being blown in the street. The Aurors found Black still there, laughing his head off, and carted him off. From what is implied, it was Black who betrayed your parents, though there is no evidence of this. After this, black is merely sent to Azkaban under the authority of Bartimus Crouch. After searching for a transcript and finding none, I determined that there had been neither an interrogation nor a trial."

"While this is rather shocking, I believe that I would like the truth. If, as you say, Black had no trial, others of his ilk may use this to get him pulled from Azkaban due to misconduct. The other posibility, no matter how improbable, is that Black is innocent. If you would send your findings to Amelia Bones asking her to investigate. If some were to hear that they had imprisoned an innocent man, as I believe him to be, they might do anything to make sure it never got out. So, can we do this while implying that I believe that Black is guilty and would prefer him dead so as to keep him alive long enough for him to get his trial." I suggested.

"Very cunning of you. Almost too cunning for one your age?" said Snarlgrip suspiciously.

"My identity was verified by blood before I could even meet with you, and you may run as many diagnostic magics that you know to determine if I am being controlled by outside sourses." I offer. Before a thought struck me, "Snarlgrip, if I wer to swear to be something I am not, like to swear I was a little girl, on pain of something benign, like thirty seconds of laughter, or even beneficial, like to be healed of some injury, would it work?"

"What do you mean, would it work?" asked Snarlgrip, confused.

"Well, I obviosly wouldn't want to swear on my life or magic, as breaking that oath would remove them from me. But say I were to swear something like 'I swear that I am a little girl on pain of turning blue for five seconds' would I then turn blue for the given time?"

"I do not know. But, for any oath to be fulfilled you must end it in the ritual phrase 'so mote it be.'" said Snarlgrip, "why don't you try the oath you just suggested and see if it works."

"Alright, let's do it." I say before taking a calming breath, "I swear that I am a little girl on pain of turning blue for five seconds, so mote it be." I sad with confidence.

I was briefly surrounded by a blue, then red aura. When the aura cleared, my skin was blue.

"Five, four, three, two, one." I counted down. As I finishe saying one, my skin returned to its proper tone. "Well, I think that works, but I think it can only do things that I am magically powerful enough to support." I suggest.

"Hmm, that may be so." said Snarlgrip, "Though you might add a time constraint to allow a gradual drain on your magic to accomplish something you could not in one go."

"Good idea, or if I were to be able to drain a larger source of magic to fuel it." I say, "though I would still have to watch how much magic would be required for the task so I do not channel more magic than my body could handle and burn myself out." I thought aloud.

"True, too bad such an option is not open to the goblin nation." said Snarlgrip, sounding truly dissapointed.

"Why is that?" I ask.

"With goblin magic, the greater the power of the oath, the more of your own blood you must spill without the aid of outside magics to replenish the lost blood."

"Ouch." I comment.

"Were you purposefully trying to distract me from my question?" asked Snarlgrip.

"No, not really." I admit, shrugging, "My mind is just rather random. But like I said, run any diagnostic magic you wish." I say, spreading my arms wide.

"I think I shall."

What followed was over an hour of spell after spell being cast on me to determine if I was being controlled. Or, like I had previously thought, I might be unintentionally possessing Harry Potter, or I might have actually become him. I was hoping for the latter.

Thankfully, my hopes were not in vain.

"It seems you are your own man Mr Potter." conceded Snarlgrip.

"No problem." I said, waving off any possible worry, "I have a rather strange mind. It doesn't really bother me that you thought I wasn't myself. I actually thank you for that, it means that my money and assets are secure in your hands. Oh, and since we are assured of each other, why don't you call me Harry."

"So I shall, Harry, thank you." said Snarlgrip, nodding in thanks.

"Would you mind me calling you Snarl, or just something shorter than Snarlgrip. It gets to be a bit of a mouthfull and I tend to get my tongue tied."

"Snarl would be fine. Though, if I may ask, how do you think you might mess up my name?"

"Oh, I don't know. I might have called you Snipgarl." I say, shrugging. At this, Snarl goes rather pale for a Goblin.

"I would not advise that."

"Why?"

"It would be like calling your son Snipdick."

"Oh, really?" I say, truly astonished before I break out into laughter. "Oh, that is rich, Snipdick." here, I snigger, "Snipdick."

"Precicely, Harry. I would be a laughing stock if that got out. So please keep that to yourlesf."

"Sure, though you have to admit it would make some pretty awesome blackmail material."

"I would hope that is not what you plan to do with that information." states Snarl threateningly.

"Nah, I'm circumcised. The term snipped dick would apply to anyone of that condition."

"You mean they cut it off?" Snarl said, shocked.

"No, not really you see, [Censored: while this is not truly explicit, who wants to actually write about it? If you know what it is, you know what i'm talking about. :Censored]

"Sweet maeve, you humans actually do that to your sons?"

"Only some of us. It is usually done for a religious reason." I state, "So, can we please move away from this topic. It's causing some shrinkage."

"Shrinkage?"

"Don't ask."

DING, came the chime from the Inbox.

"Ah, it seems that they have finally located everything." said Snarl, pulling a rather large packet with a small not atop. After reading the not Snarl spoke, "it seems that they have organized the items in such a way that all of the stolen items are at the top of the pile and organized by the thief." finished Snarl as he began to flip through the packet.

"So, who are the primary thieves, Snarl?"

"In order: Avery, Bulstrode, Crabbe, Diggle, Doge, Dumbledore, Dursley, Figg, Fletcher, Fudge, Goyle, LeStrange, Lockhart, Malfoy, Nott, Riddle, Rotwood, Scrimgour, Snape, Umbrage, Weasley, Yaxley, several businesses, and the Ministry."

"That is a rather long list, isn't it. So, how do we go about getting them back and punishing them for it." I ask.

"Well, as for retrieving what was stolen, I can send out teams to retrieve the stolen items." at my raised eyebrow he explained, "It is one of our few free services, partially because we help ourselves to anything else along the way."

"Nice. When can I expect progress on that front?"

"A few days at most. You never know, some of the items may be stored here."

"Alright, we've covered my guardianship, property theft, and injustice. Why don't we cover my assets and properties." I say, before thinking again, "you know what, nevermind, I can go through the ledger later. So, let's talk about the future of my finances."

"in what way?"

"Would you be willing to begin investing my money to a profitable end, in both the magical and mundane world. In the mundane world, I would like you to focus on technology companies and telecommunication companies. In the magical world, I would like a controlling interest in the media first, then I would like to move into the resource business. Besides that, follow what makes sense."

"That would be fine, so long as I received an appropriate commission." said Snarl, "Say, thirty percent of profit."

"What do you take me fore, some clueless, inbred, sorry excuse for a sapient being. No more than five percent."

"Why you theif, I would not work for anything less than fifteen."

"Seven."

"Twelve."

"Three."

"WHAT, you went back down. In fact you went lower than your original offer."

"I know, ain't it grand?"

"Fine, ten."

"Done."

"You are strange, lad." says Snarl. I giggle.

"So, do we have anything else to do?" I ask, "Like an inheritance test or something to determine what gifts and abilities I have. Oh, and I need to see a healer to see what can be done about fixing my body." I state, "Oh, and could you have someone chaeck to see if I am bound or tracked or monitored in any way."

"Yes, all of those ideas are good, should I call our resident healer to start wit the diagnostics. He should also be able to tell if there are any bindings on you. The inheritance and Blood-trait rituals will have to wait until you are healthy enough to withstand it and have any blocks or bindings removed."

"And how long do you think that will take?"

"We will know in a few minutes, when the healer gives us an idea." said Snarl. A moment later there was a knock at the door. "Enter" said Snarl. And so they did. In walked two healers, or at least that was my guess from the matching pastel green robes with a caduceus over their left breast.

"You called?" said the first to enter, a man that looked to be in his thirties. The second to enter was a woman that looked in her forties.

And knowing the wizarding world, the man is probable mid forties, and the woman in her late fifties or early sixties.

"Yes, Healer Smith, Healer Jones, this is Mr Potter. He needs a full diagnosis. Both the upper reaches and the depths."(1)

"Right." said the two as they began to cast various spells over me.

"Upper reaches? Depths? What are those?" I ask, having an idea, but needing confirmation.

"The upper reaches refers to the physical body and the psyche, the depths refers to the magic and the soul."

"The soul? How often are their problems regarding the soul?" I ask.

"You would be surprised. Spells that effect how a person acts have a minor effect on the soul. Like a compulsion can be detected by its effect on both the soul and the mind." said The woman, who by the tag on her robe was healer Jones.

"Thank you for the explanation. Should we quiet down to let you work?" I ask.

"That would be nice." commented Jones.

"Then I can wait til you are done." I finish.

About five minutes later, minutes filled with me twiddling my thumbs and watching the steadily darkening faces of the two healers, they finally finished.

Jones collapsed into the only available chair, rubbing her temples. Smith began pacing angrily, muttering under hi breath.

"So, I take it the result is 'not good'?" I ask.

"Understatement of the century kid." said Smith angrily, "Do you know ho many broken bones you had?"

"No, I lost count." I admit.

"Yeah, I would have too. Especially since the only unbroken bone in your body is your third thoracic vertebra, and every limb along with most of the ribs have been broken multiple times I would have been astonished if you had been able to keep count." said Smith, sighing, "Kid, how are you still alive?"

"Magic." I say jokingly while doing jazz hands.

"The kid is right." said Jones, "His core is huge, even while bound. He has thirteen bindings on his core alone. There are several other blocks attuned to various magical talents that he has. Though a few of them seemed to be cracked slightly from sheer pressure."

"Really?" asked Smith. He received a quiet nod from Jones.

"So, what needs to happen to fix all of this shit?" I ask.

"Language." admonished Jones.

"Lady, I've just been told that someone took it upon themselves to bind my magic multiple times. I think I've earned the right to curse." I deadpan, "along with that, I've spent the past ten years of my life as the slave to my aunt and uncle. So, pardon my french, fuck off."

"I think I like you kid." said Smith, laughing his ass off, "you're the first person I've met that has been able to cuss at Jones and live."

"So, like I said, how do we fix it?"

"Well, the rituals to remove the block require a healthy body, so we have to work on that first." said Jones, turning to look at Smith.

"If you don't mind staying in an infirmary for a week, I can get you healthy enough for the rituals by then. After that, I can work on negating all of the abuse you've suffered. That will take about a month. A week of which will have to be spent in the infirmary so I can repair the bones. After that, it is mostly a potion regimen."

"So, Jones, what will it take to get rid of the blocks and bindings?" asked Snarl.

"Well, there was something in my scan that might interfere with the rituals. Give me a few days and I'll get back to you on that." she said.

"Right, so a week in the infirmary being subjected to who knows what." I say, resigned, "I'll need something to occupy myself with. Snarl, what can I access in the vaults? That reminds me, where are the key's to the vaults? Can we recall them?" I ask Snarl as Smith and Jones leave.

"Yes, that is quite easy." said Snarl. "Each Key has a recall function built in, in case of theft."

"Then let's recall them." I requested. Nodding, Snarl pressed a button on his in box and a moment later four keys appeared in the tray.

"Four?" I asked.

"Yes, one for your trust vault, one fro your mother's, one for the Potter vault, and one for the Potter Heirloom vault." informed Snarl.

"Ah, and which can I access?"

"The trust vault." said Snarl, "You can access your mother's at thirteen, and the other two at sixteen. Or, if you are emancipated, you would immediately gain access to all four."

"Alright, that's fine." I say. "One last thing before I head off to grab some gold and do some shopping. Wait, make that two things. First, I am sure that, due to my fame, some companies are using my name as advertising, let's make them pay for it. And the same for any books. Finally, is there some way I can access my money without coming down to the vault every time I run out of gold?"

"Yes, we offer a charmed money purse or wallet and something akin to a debit card for purchases in the muggle world. Would you like one?" asked Snarl.

"As long as I can withdraw either form of money from the wallet and the fees are waived." I say.

"Ah, an inteligent move. Though you must still pay for the initial cost of both, agreed?" said Snarl.

"Agreed." With that, Snarl pulled two forms from his desk and filled out certain portions.

"If you will sign in these places," said Snarl, pointing to several places on both forms, "and place a drop of blood in the box at the bottom." he said, offering a small blade to me to draw the blood. Signing where indicated and adding the requisite drops of blood, I handed them to Snarl, who placet them in the out box. In a flash, the forms were gone and in the in box was a black leather wallet and a black card with a silver G on the face.

"Thank you Honored Snarlgrip for your time."

"And thank you Mr Potter for your business." replied Snarl.

As I left Snarl's office, Griphook reappeared to guide me back to the lobby.

"There you are." said Vector as I entered the lobby. "What took so long?" she asked.

"I had to deal with several things. Mostly people stealing from me. I also underwent a medical scan." I said, "So, now that that is over, let's get shopping."


(1) I want to give credit where it is due, but I can't remember where I read this, so I'm just going to say it isn't my original idea, it was someone else's.

So, how'd you like it? R&R please.