Disclaimer: All of this belongs to J.K. Rowling
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He had finally worked up the nerve to enter the common room. He braced himself for the stares he would no doubt receive. For the argument outside had not been a quiet one. He walked slowly and with trepidation toward the stairs of his dormitory. Each step up the stairs to his dormitory felt like an eternity, his hand clenched the rail as if holding on for life. His fingers trembled as they closed around the cold crystal doorknob. The creak of the opening door challenged the oppressive silence that hung in the air. The darkness of the dorm was overwhelming as his eyes struggled to adjust. He could barely make out two sleeping figures. He walked closer to James' bed and knew instantly that James was only feigning sleep, the rise and fall of his chest was too deliberate to be convincing. He continued over to his bed, taking extra care to walk heavily and step on the floorboards that creaked. He sat down on his bed, the mattress springs groaned under his weight. He shrugged off his robes and shoes and pulled the blankets over him. He turned to look at James.
His tired eyes were wide open, watching Sirius with an unreadable expression; his face was gaunt and gray under the light of the moon, his unwashed face had an almost waxy look to it. Sirius sent James a silent plea for forgiveness, hope desperately clawing at his heart and evident in his eyes. James merely shook his head and turned over in his bed, away from Sirius.
Sirius sighed, releasing the breath he hadn't realized he was holding. How could he make it up to James? To Remus? James hadn't even been willing to talk to him, so how could he prove he was sorry?
()()
Breakfast the next morning was despondent for the marauders and this was well observed by those who were dining in the great hall. James and Peter were down early, which was cause for them to receive many stares. They normally came to a meal when it was halfway over (so as to make an entrance). Not only that, but James' other half was nowhere to be seen, and Remus, they presumed, was gone visiting his sick mother again.
James and Peter were currently eating in silence, an abnormally large amount of food was piled onto their plates-they were planning on skipping lunch to visit Remus in the hospital wing. Remus was in a particularly bad condition because he had not had James or Sirius to keep him from biting and scratching himself when he was alone in the shrieking shack. On a normal full moon- or a full moon that was spent with James, Sirius, and Peter- Remus was able to be distracted by his companions as well as kept under control, but, without them, he became nervous and self-destructive. And the morning after nights such as these, Remus was tired, grouchy, and emotionally unstable, which was why none of the other marauders wanted to even attempt to shed light on the reason why he was left alone in the first place.
After an uneventful morning in their classes, James and Peter left Slughorn's room in the dungeons and made their way to the hospital wing. However, upon entering the hospital wing they found their way blocked by a fuming Madam Pomfrey.
"Good Merlin! This boy needs his rest! He'll not be having any visitors until this evening!" she all but yelled.
"But-"
"I don't care how urgent it is Mister Potter! He already has enough to do with already!"
"Oh come on Poppy," her eyes narrowed at his use of her first name, he continued, ignoring her obvious displeasure at his manner of addressing her, "he'll want to see us!"
"I'm sorry, but he already has a visitor by request of Professor Dumbledore. You'll just have to wait."
"A visitor?" piped up Peter, "Who?"
"Never you mind," she replied, her eyes flashed in irritation.
James huffed, recognizing defeat, and turned away tugging Peter along with him, who was trying to get Pomfrey to concede by saying "please" an innumerable amount of times.
They strode away, both disappointed by the outcome of the morning, and progressed toward the great hall for lunch, for they were considerably hungrier than they predicted they would be. They looked around for seats upon entering and found that the only seats that were open were either right next to Lily and her friends or across from them. James sighed; this was going to be a long and awkward lunch-for both of them. He sat down next to Lily and Peter sat across from him. He frowned as he felt Lily stiffen beside him. He tried to catch her eye but she was looking determinedly at her plate of food, pretending to take no notice of him. He sighed and turned away, grumpily piling food onto his plate.
It wasn't his fault Snape said what he said. Okay, maybe he hadn't done anything to help either, but he wasn't going to just stand by and do nothing. It killed him to see her like this, cold and indifferent, when he knew she was struggling to just keep it together. Even now as he watched her, her jaw would clench and unclench and her fingers trembled ever so slightly, but her face remained a careful mask. No one else could see these subtle differences, to them she was just the same, somewhat stern, but all around good natured, perfect, Prefect, Lily.
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