Author's Note: Well, life got in the way a bit and I couldn't write as much as I wanted and when I actually did sit down to write, a new chapter of this story came out alot better than the rest of JWTF. So, I went with the flow and knocked this out. But JWTF is very close, I just need to sit down and let it come to me. Hopefully, the epilogue for Timeless will come out soon too. ;)
Anyway, this chapter will answer alot of your questions and I can't wait to see what you all think of it. As always, thank you so much for all your reviews, they mean so much to me.
Thanks to my love Maggie for continuing to be an amazing beta. :)
Chapter Three "I Won't Back Down"
Well I wont back down, no I wont back down Gonna stand my ground, wont be turned around
You can stand me up at the gates of hell
But I wont back down
And Ill keep this world from draggin me down
Gonna stand my ground and I wont back down
Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
Exhausted, Lucas dropped the last box onto the living room floor of the New York City loft that was his new home. Looking around, he was satisfied that at least all of his furniture and belongings were in one place, even if it would take him weeks to organize it all.
He couldn't believe he had really moved here, but it felt so right. Tonight he'd be having dinner with Haley, Peyton and Brooke and he was nervous as hell. Having Haley on his side was one thing, but Peyton and Brooke were just a tad daunting. Who the hell was he kidding? Those two put the fear of God into him and he knew that time only multiplied their sarcasm.
"Need any help?"
Lucas froze, pretty sure his heart even stopped. It couldn't be? Slowly, he turned around and there, in his doorway, stood his only brother.
Nathan hesitated in the doorway for a moment, but took a chance and stepped inside. "I guess you got it all up here. I wasn't always the best at my timing." He cleared his throat nervously, trying to get Lucas to respond to him any shape of form.
He got his wish because as soon as he was within reach, Lucas threw a left hook that landed squarely on Nathan's jaw and sent him tumbling towards the hardwood floor.
Nathan stayed down on the ground and rubbed his already aching jaw. "Damn, I guess I deserved that."
"Get the fuck out." Lucas gritted out through clenched teeth.
Getting up of the floor, Nathan stood his ground. "If you want to fight, then game on, but at the end of the day when we're both bruised and bloody, I'll still be here until you listen to what I have to say. "
The two brothers stared at each other in a silent battle of wills before Lucas finally broke eye contact and turned away.
"You have five minutes." He relented and motioned for Nathan to sit on his mahogany, leather couch while he sat in a chair off to the side.
"I'm still in love with her Luke." Nathan stated plainly.
Lucas rolled his eyes. "Tell me something I don't know. I'm not an idiot Nathan, I knew you loved Haley then and I figured you've never stopped, but that doesn't explain or excuse all the things that you've done."
"Just let me finish Lucas. You don't understand how hard it was for me."
Lucas couldn't take one more second of this shit and rose to his feet. "Understand? You want me to understand? You weren't there GOD DAMN IT!" Lucas shouted.
"I was the one that had to tell Haley you left her, I was the one who had to watch her break, I was the one who held her in my arms for days as she sobbed for you, I was the one who had to deal with the guilt that I ever let you near her, and because of what you did, I was the one who had to give her up for five years so that she could have a life where you didn't haunt her."
"I had to live without her too, Lucas!" Nathan shouted right back.
Staring at his brother as if he was insane, Lucas went to a box in the corner and quickly ripped it open. After a few moments of searching his finally produced a small velvet bag out of a smaller box marked Haley. Shaking the object out of the bag, he came back to stand in front of his brother and then slammed the object down onto the table.
Looking down, Nathan saw the ring he'd given Haley six months before their wedding day. He'd saved forever for that ring, because from the moment Haley slipped it on her finger, he knew that's where it belonged. Just as he had known from the moment he collapsed on the court she was where he belonged.
Flashback…
"Why are we here again?" Nathan groaned as Haley lead him into the small antique shop that they had driven an hour from Tree Hill to get to.
"Because you said you wanted to help me pick out Lucas' birthday present and this place usually has some amazing rare book finds." She explained as she went directly to a shelf that contained several ancient looking books.
Not taking his eyes off her, he smirked as she raised her hand up to reach a book and her shirt rose, revealing her tattoo of his jersey number. What he wouldn't give to be lined up behind her, sliding in and out of her as he stared at that number. 'Damn he needed a cold shower.'
"Nathan quit staring at me and help me reach this." Haley said, while at the same time blushing, figuring he was picturing her in a lot less clothing. Ever since she'd gotten the tattoo, he'd become way too fascinated with her backside.
Coming up behind her, he placed his hands on her hips and effortlessly lifted her so could reach the book. "I love that I can make you blush just by staring at you." He teased as he sat her back down.
"It's not the staring it's the fact that I know that smirk on your face usually means you have me in some compromising position."
"Oh trust me, I have you in every possible position."
"Nathan." She blushed even more and swatted his arm.
Leaning down, he kissed her forehead tenderly. "I'll be good, I just love seeing you blush for me."
"I can't take you Scotts anywhere." She admonished playfully.
"Well, I hope when the other Scott took you here, you weren't having the same problem." He commented light heartedly, although at times he still couldn't accept that Lucas didn't want more with Haley. How could any guy spend that much time with her and not try something? He'd been better though at understanding the platonic yet apparently powerful connection Haley and Lucas shared. While he was still insanely jealous of when Lucas ever spent time with Haley, he'd come to accept Lucas wasn't half bad and that even calling him his brother was getting easier each day.
"Oh please, he just always managed to knock something fragile over. Wow, this is perfect." Haley beamed as she ran her fingers over a first edition John Steinbeck that contained his entire thought process and all his letters to his editor as he wrote one of his masterpieces, East of Eden. She knew Lucas would love it.
Nathan took it out of her hand and looked at her confused. "A hundred bucks for a worn out book about a better book."
"Lucas has always wanted to be a writer and this book gets inside the head of one of the greatest authors of all time. Trust me, Lucas will freak about this book."
"I'll never get yours and Lucas's obsession with all things old."
Haley patted his cheek "You're lucky you're so pretty."
Wrapping his arm around her shoulders, he led her to the register. "You think I'm hot."
"Lord, why did I feed your ego?" She rolled her eyes and laughed.
A woman in her sixties smiled at them as they approached the counter. "Did you find everything you need?"
Smiling kindly, Haley handed her the book. "Yes ma'am, thank you very much."
As the women slowly began wrapping the book, Nathan absentmindedly began to look at the jewelry showcased in the glass counter and noticed Haley staring at one item in particular.
"Uh, can we see that ring right there, Ma'am?" Nathan pointed to the ring in question.
"Nathan what are you doing?" Haley whispered, slightly embarrassed.
He just smiled and took the ring from the woman. Facing Haley, he took her left hand and slipped it on her left ring finger. He really didn't stop to think why he was doing this…it just felt like the most normal thing in the world.
The woman smiled to the young couple, it was obvious they were young but you could just feel the love between them. "That's a lovely choice sir. It's a ring designed from 1920's and such a gorgeous work of art. It's a one-carat brilliant-cut, round diamond raised in an elegant split prong platinum setting with open sides that leave a clear side view of the center diamond. And there are exactly twenty-three beaded diamonds along the band. Oh, and the best part, if you notice there are two secret diamonds set below the center diamond on the front and backside. Secret diamonds are said to represent two souls that meet in the middle to create a much more powerful united soul, which is demonstrated by the center diamond."
"It's the most beautiful thing I have ever seen." Haley breathed as she gazed down at her hand that was still being held by Nathan, and she couldn't help the jolt she felt knowing he was the one to place it on her hand.
Nathan had known since that first tutoring session there was something different about Haley and that from that day on his life would never be the same; and he was right.
They'd only been together for four weeks, but he was already hopelessly in love and he never imagined he could ever be capable of falling in love with parents like his. She opened his eyes to a whole new world and he'd never been happier in his entire life. So, it really didn't come as a surprise to him that when he placed that ring on her finger, that deep inside he knew she was the one. In that moment, his entire future flashed before him and all he saw was Haley.
"Shall, I wrap it?" The woman asked breaking them out of their thoughts.
Haley began to blush profusely. "Oh, I'm sorry. We were just playing around, we won't be buying it." She took the ring off and handed it back to the woman.
"Yet." Nathan whispered down to Haley.
End of Flashback…
"I had to dig that ring out of her clenched fist, you son of a bitch. She not only cried, she bled for you. You tore her down completely, Nathan. Everything she trusted in life, you ripped away and left me to pick up the pieces. You couldn't even tell her to her face. You're a fucking coward and you never deserved her."
Nathan put his head in his hands, trying to hold back his emotions, but the images of a broken Haley crying for him was just too much to bear. "If I could take it back, I would in a second," he whispered; his voice thick with pent up emotions.
"But you can't." Lucas answered back coldly. "Just get the hell out Nathan, nothing you can say will change a damn thing."
"I can't live without her Luke. I tried, I tried for five years to keep my distance."
Lucas laughed bitterly. "You're such a prince."
"With or without your help, I'm fighting to get her back Luke." Nathan finally revealed.
"Are you serious?"
"More serious than I have been about anything in my entire life. I left because I never thought I could the man she deserved and there's a little more to it, but she's deserves to hear why before anyone else. Point is, no matter what reasons I had, I realized I was wrong. Every day without her has killed me. I threw myself into the NBA, hoping that it would at least distract me, but nothing helped."
Lucas sighed and sat back down. As much as he hated to admit it, he could see Nathan was telling the truth. "Is that why you retired?"
Nathan nodded. "So you saw that?"
"I may not play ball anymore, but I do still watch it."
"I guess a just figured you'd avoid anything to do with me, just like Haley."
Pausing, Lucas decided that if Nathan could be honest so could he. "I won't lie Nathan, I pretty much erased you from my life except for the exceptional game on television, but what choice did you leave me. You didn't just leave Haley that day, you left me too. So what the hell did you expect? One day you were there and the next, you left everything behind like it never meant anything to you. I won't apologize for a single bad thought I felt and still feel for you."
"I don't expect you to, but believe me, you haven't called me a single name I haven't already called myself. I know this is going to be an uphill battle not only with Haley, but with you too. All, I'm asking is for you to give me a shot."
Pulling his vibrating phone out of his pocket, Lucas noticed it was Haley, but let it go to voicemail. No way he could handle talking to her at this moment. "Honestly man, I don't know if Haley could ever look at you the way she used to. Plus, she's happy Nathan. She's made an incredible life for herself here and I'm pretty sure that life has no room for you in it. I know that's not what you want to hear, but I'm not going to lie to you."
Nathan wasn't going to be deterred. "Come on Lucas, you remember Haley and I together. Can you honestly tell me you think she's going to find that with anyone else? Because if you think that she's better off without me and could find something even close to what we shared then I'll go back to where I came from. But if there is a single ounce of you that believes that just maybe I could open her eyes to me again, then don't stand in my way. You don't have to like it or even support it, just let me try. I'm fighting for my life here."
Watching his brother, Lucas could tell how much pain he was in, and while ninety nine percent of him wanted to tell him Haley would never be happy with him and to get the hell out of New York, there was that one percent of him that wouldn't be quiet. It kept flashing images of that radiant smile on Haley's face that only being in love could produce, it kept telling him that maybe the only guy who could find their way into Haley's heart was the one that broke it, and more importantly it kept screaming that if his brother and best friend could recapture the love that people usually wait a lifetime for and never find, then they should have that chance.
"Alright." Lucas finally softly agreed and Nathan knew it had taken everything in his brother to say that one word.
"But, Nathan, like I said you have no idea of the pain she went though. Getting her to forgive you is one thing, but getting her to ever contemplate letting you back into her heart is a feat I don't think you truly understand."
Picking up the ring, Nathan slipped it into his pocket. "You're right, she'd never let me back in; that's why I have to get her to see she never really let me out."
…
"Hey Brooke, it's me." Haley spoke into her cell.
"Hey Tutorgirl, where are you? Our reservations are in twenty minutes."
Haley glanced at her watch. "Shit, I bet Lucas has already left. And of course he never called me back from this afternoon."
"Lucas was always a stickler for being on time. Lord, sometimes he even said no to sex because it would make us late. Can you imagine?" Brooke asked, truly aghast at the thought any man could say no to her.
Laughing, Haley entered the key code Lucas had given her. "Look, you and Peyton get in the car and pick me up at Lucas'."
Brooke motioned for Peyton to grab her keys. "I thought you said Lucas already left?"
"Yeah, well I'm already here, besides he gave me a key to his place. So, even if I missed him, this gives me a chance to check out his place."
"Oh goody, let us know if he has any creepy shrines of Goldilocks? Since obviously he had some sick obsession with her to ever let me go," Brooke winked playfully to Peyton as they climbed into Brooke's new baby…her shiny, silver Range Rover.
Haley giggled as she heard Peyton hit Brooke in the arm and the brunette started whining.
"Stop it you two. Just hurry up and get here."
"Wait…Haley what are you wearing?" Brooke asked, sweet as pie.
"I changed into the strapless little black dress, I keep in my office in case of emergency…Oh wait, let me clarify, the one you put in my office after that one time I showed up in what you deemed a 'boring' outfit to dinner at Tao. I'm freezing my buns off though, because you didn't leave me an emergency jacket or wrap."
"Haley, why would I do that? You are supposed to have a guy warm you up, not a jacket. Besides, playing the 'I'm cold' card always gets them every time."
Peyton grabbed the phone. "I can't take her babbling one more minute. We'll honk when we get there. It's just a few blocks down right?"
"Yeah, it's that newly renovated building down by that Italian restaurant we love."
"Got it, see you then."
Right as she stuck her key in the door she heard movement inside and couldn't believe Lucas hadn't left yet.
"You know Lucas, you could have at least answered your phone to tell me you were going to be late." Haley teased as she swung open the door, a huge smile on her face.
"Haley." The words left Nathan's lips in a whisper, afraid that if he said her name too loud she would vanish.
"You're not Lucas." Haley finally spoke after two of the longest minutes in his life, but it was clear she was still in shock and he wasn't sure if she had even taken a breath.
There he stood…Nathan Scott, in nothing but jeans hung loose on his hips. He was barefoot, and wandering about as if he was comfortable in his setting, meaning he wasn't just here by coincidence. If she had seen him anywhere else, she would have written it off as a hallucination, but him being here in his brother's house…so comfortable, it was real…too real.
'God she was gorgeous.' She always had been…but he could tell that now she was more confident in her beauty and wasn't afraid to let it show. He couldn't believe she was standing right there in front of him.
"You're not Lucas." She softly repeated.
He shifted nervously. "Uh, yeah…look Hales." He moved closer.
Hearing him choose to use such an intimate form of her name, made her blood run cold. She quickly held up her hand to stop him from moving any closer. "Don't."
Nodding, he took a step back. "I know this is a shock."
"Haley, I don't care how scary Peyton looks in the shrine, it's still no reason to keep us waiting and make me have to sweet talk my way into this building." Brooke bitched as she walked into Lucas' apartment.
"Oh, you have got to be kidding me?" Brooke remarked as soon as she saw the scene before her.
"Haley let's go; now." She pulled at Haley's arm.
"Wait!" Nathan tried to stop them.
Brooke swung around—fire in her eyes. "Wait? You want her to wait?" She asked as she slowly got closer to him.
"That's fucking irony if I ever heard it. Where do you get off? I mean I've always known you were an arrogant ass, but this is all time low even for you."
"Brooke this is none of your business." Nathan warned her.
"None of my business? You're the one who has no business even breathing the same air as Haley. I don't know why you're here or what your plans are…but stay the hell away from her Nathan or I swear to God…"
"Brooke stop." Haley intervened.
Nathan looked hopefully to Haley, but he was only met with emotionless eyes.
"He's not worth it." She spoke firmly, yet her words were hollow, almost mechanical.
Brooke smiled reassuringly toward her. "You're right he's not." But before she went back to Haley's side, she faced Nathan once more and slapped him as hard as she could. "But I'm a little slow on the uptake."
Nathan rubbed his sore cheek that just happened to be right above his still throbbing jaw. "I'm not going away." He yelled after them.
Brooke took Haley by the arm, but just before they walked out, Haley turned back and locked eyes with him and he knew she saw the promise shining in his eyes.
But he still saw nothing in hers, but he had expected that, even prepared himself for it. He just had to get her to feel again for him, even if it was hate; because at least with hate there was still passion and with that passion he would get her to see their love again.
He would never back down…never again.
Flashback…
"Haley James soon-to-be-Scott, get your horny little ass out here pronto."
Haley rolled off Nathan, giggling.
"Just five more minutes." Nathan smirked as he grabbed her wrist and pulled her back on top of him.
Haley kissed him quickly on the lips and then pulled back ever so slightly "If I stay here, I know we're going to do something naughty, and I think Brooke might kill me if we break tradition." She purred against his lips.
"Mmm, I don't ever want you to leave this bed…let's call the priest and he can marry us right here." He huskily suggested, as he began to kiss her neck.
"Only one more dayyy." She half spoke, half moaned.
"Actually twelve hours, four minutes and twenty seven seconds." Brooke proclaimed, as she checked her watch in the doorway.
"Brooke get the hell out of here." Nathan bitched as he held on tight to Haley.
Brooke just rolled her eyes. "Sorry Scott, but it's almost midnight and the groom cannot see the bride on her wedding day. Haley we are now down to less than four minutes. "
"Yes, Bitch Davis." Haley grinned and saluted.
"That's Bitch Davis, maid of honor extradornaire to you Miss 'I am a pain in the ass because I am the bride" James." Brooke playfully corrected her while tossing Haley one of Nathan's sweatshirts that was lying haphazardly on the ground.
Reluctantly getting out of the bed, Haley slipped the sweatshirt over her tank top. "Oh, you know I love you bossing me around Tigger and I'm coming, but…um… I have no idea where my shorts are."
Brooke grabbed her arm. "No time, besides that shirt swallows you whole anyway, you can't even see your cute caboose."
"Damn Brooke can you even give me a minute to say goodbye to my fiancée before you kidnap her? Nathan interjected.
Brooke checked her watch. "Um, no, but we do have time for your whipped ass to blow your Haley-bear a kiss."
Nathan ignored her and looked at Haley. "I'll see you at the finish line…I love you Hales."
"I wouldn't miss it for the world and I love you too Nathan Scott." Haley promised with a wink and a radiant smile before she was pulled out of his sight.
About an hour trying to get some sleep, he decided to give up and shoot some hoops.
Haley had moved in a month before, once her parents declared they didn't want their future son-in-law breaking his neck trying to sneak into their daughter's room every night. Lydia and Jimmy were not your average parents, besides in their minds once you are engaged the rest of the wedding stuff was just red tape. To them if you already pledged your life together in your hearts, sharing a bed is just expected.
The only negative was that when she was not beside him, he got restless and never got a good night sleep. He figured his body would never settle for anything less than having Haley by his side every night.
Once he arrived at the Rivercourt, he began hitting shot after shot, running tomorrow's events through his head.
"Mrs. Haley James Scott." Nathan proudly recited Haley's soon-to-be new name out loud as he launched another nothing but net ball through the hoop at the Rivercourt. While most grooms usually have cold feet the night before they say 'I Do' Nathan couldn't get over the fact that by this time tomorrow Haley would finally be his wife. If he had had it his way, they would have eloped six months ago, but Haley had told him long before he proposed of her dream to be married at the beautiful plantation where her parents were married.
"Not if I can help it." Dan mused as he stepped onto the court.
Nathan missed his shot and whipped around to see his father—smug as ever.
"What do you want Dad?"
"For you and Haley to have a very happy life…apart." He added at the end with a smirk.
"Save it Dad, she's going to be my wife and you sure as hell better start respecting her."
"You think so little of me son. I have the utmost respect for Haley, in fact I want her to have the best life possible. Which is why it would be such a shame for her not to be able to able to go college." Dan smiled wickedly.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"Well, you know that National scholarship that Haley so admirably earned?"
"Of course"
"Turns out being the Mayor of the town she attends high school in, gives me some pull. I mean how would it look when I presented evidence that Miss James wasn't who she said she was."
Nathan clenched his fists at his side. "What evidence?"
"Unfortunately, Haley is too squeaky clean for my taste. So I've had to waste my time adding fraud to my lists of evil deeds."
"You would seriously hurt her like that? You know we don't have money to pay her tuition without that help and neither do her parents."
Dan chuckled. "Well, there is a way around it. You have a choice, you can either go to UCLA or the NBA." Dan said as calmly, as if he was presenting Nathan with a choice of a hamburger or a hotdog.
"I turned down Phoenix, Dad, and I didn't even apply to UCLA and neither did Haley."
Dan rolled his eyes. "I think your mom most have dropped you on your head because you are missing the point son. Those two options separate you from Haley; and I applied to UCLA for you and I also talked with a friend I know who says Phoenix is willing to re-extend the offer. "
Nathan started to walk away. "You're fucking insane." He yelled back to his father.
"Are you that selfish son? Haley will have no way to go to college and end up resenting you. You could never be a husband anyway, you know she's going to end up leaving you. Right now she's still enamored by you, but what happens when she starts to see there is nothing more to you, that you truly are my son. Because one day she's going to wake up and see me when she looks at you. It's in your blood son and there's no way that you can avoid it. Look at your mother, you say I destroyed her, do you really think you won't do that to Haley?"
Nathan kept his back turned to his father, but halted. "I would never do that to her. I will never become you."
"Didn't Haley want to go Stanford and yet, low and behold, she ends up going to your dream school? Sounds like she's the only one sacrificing. Just think about it Nathan, sure it will be hard for awhile losing her, but you're giving her a future, a future with an education and a future in which you can never hurt her the way I did your mother. You're saving her Nathan, and deep inside you know what needs to be done, you're just too scared to lose her."
End of Flashback…
That was the night he backed down and let his father win. Looking back, Nathan knew that walking away that night was something just like his father would do. It set him on a path to become Dan Scott. Dan too had walked away from the love of his life when he left Karen, and it turned him into a bitter, selfish shell of a man that ended up hurting everyone around him, especially Nathan and his mother.
But, what Dan never counted on was that Nathan's love for Haley would never fade and that Nathan might actually learn from the sins of his father. It may have taken him five years to see the light, but now he was back on the right path, back to being the man he was meant to be, and back to where he belonged…with Haley.
Cath
