(TW: contains Mutilation and metal illness

Otterspeck p.o.v.

Otterspeck sat inside his den sorting herbs . He was tired from a long day the sun was setting soon . He place the herbs in a little hole in his den. That's when he heard a small voice, "Would you like me to help you Otterspeck. " He turn to see his apprenciate Springpaw behind him.

Otterspeck shook his head," Im good Springpaw I was about to-." Thats when he was cut off by a loud yowl . He saw Honeylegs run towards his den.

The she cat stopped ,"Fishpetal having her kits!" Otterspeck quickly grab his herbs and limp fastly as he could to the nursery .Springpaw and Honeylegs right behind him he saw Rustwater rush over to him.

Rustwater looked nervous, " Will she be okay? I want see her."

Otterspeck looked at the tom,"She'll be okay Rustwater I need to stay out here you will do no help by coming in. Rustwater nodded Otterspeck quickly looked back at Honeylegs and Springpaw, " Springpaw come with me and Honeylegs stay out here I need you to make sure Rustwater doesn't get any bright ideas and comes in." Honeylegs nodded and Springpaw followed after Otterspeck . When he entered the nursery he saw his sister Mothsea comforting Fishpetal.

Mothsea looked up,"There you are she having them right now." Otterspeck nodded and limped over to the she cat side.

He looked over at a nervous Springpaw who had a stick in her jaws, "Springpaw go ahead a give that to Fishpetal. " Springpaw nodded and gave the stick to Fishpetal who was wailing in pain. Otterspeck softly spoke to Fishpetal, "Ok I need you to take these herbs the first one coming.

Fishpetal licked up the herb in bit on the stick again a small kit slid out Springpaw came over nip the sack and lick the kit clean,"It's a she kit!" There another wail from Fishpetal.

Otterspeck looked over at the two she cats who were comforting Fishpetal ,"Here come another one ." Soon another kit slide out Otterspeck nip the sack and lick the kit he quickly announced, "It's another she cat." That when he saw Fishpetal spasm from the pain he realized she was going into shock and still one more kit coming . Thats when he heard a snap and turn to see the stick had broke. He turn see Springpaw panic on her face.

Springpaw yowled,"She dying! What are we going to do? " Before he could answer he saw blood was coming out of Fishpetal the shock must made her start to bleed . Thats when the last kit slide out Otterspeck quickly nip the sack it was a tom kit. He turn back to Fishpetal she spasm one more time then fell limp. She was gone.

Otterspeck looked over at the two she cats shaking, "S-She with Starclan now her kits lived. " He saw Springpaw who only became his apprenciate a moon ago she never expriced a death like this. The poor little she cat start to shake . He turn to see Fishpetal body wasn't their anymore it was replaced with his mentor Redwillow he froze in fear then it was Fishpetal's body again. Thats he saw Rustwater come in the tom looked at them.

"Is everything ok ? Is Fishpetal done kit-." The tom stop and looked at Fishpetal body,"FISHPETAL! What happen?

Otterspeck sighed, "She died from shock and blood loss .I'm sorry Rustwater she gave birth to three health kits two she kits and a tom kit . " The tom looked at Otterspeck then to Springpaw who was still crying as she leaned onto Mothsea .

Rustwater growled at Springpaw, " YOU -YOU KILLED HER YOU ROUGE BLOOD!" Otterspeck saw Rustwater looking at Springpaw his claw unsheathed, "YOU PROBABLY POISON THAT STICK WITH DEATHBERRIES YOU DEREVE TO DIE! " Rustwater yowled as he pointed to the broken stick on the ground .

Otterspeck jump in front of his apprenciate baring his teeth, "Get away from my apprentice .Fishpetal died of blodd loss and shock not of poison. How dare you accuse Springpaw of killing your mate.You have no right of doing so just because her father was a loner."

Rustwater snarled, "Get out my way Broken leg. "

Otterspeck snapped, " Don't disrespect me Im your medicine cat and Springpaw is too .You hurt her you break the code you still need to take care of you and Fishpetal's kits they need thier father."

Rustwater placed sheathed his claws," Fine , but don't this over Dirty blood." Rustwater looked at a trembling Springpaw thats when Crookedfern,Swiftstorm,and Eveningpaw came in.

"What happen i-is she dead?" The voice came from Crookedfern. Otterspeck nodded Crookedfern looked at him ,"Ill take care of them how many are there."

Otterspeck sighed," Three, two she kits and a tom kit. " That's when heard any angry yowl he saw Rustwater fury looking at him.

Rustwater sneered, "These not my kits they don't look like me !" Otterspeck went over and looked at the kits they didn't like Rustwater at all the tom kit was black and one she kits was silver with black speckles the other she was lilac with silver legs.

Otterspeck looked over at the six cats," Swiftstorm and Mothsea can take Fishpetal body to my den so prepare her for vigil and Eveningpaw take your sister to appreciate den Ill give her some poppyseeds. Crookedfern these kits need milk now." Otterspeck watch Swiftstorm and Mothsea pick up Fishpetal body and carry her outside the nursery .

Springpaw its ok it's not your fault lets go hang out with Pumapaw ." Eveningpaw slowly lead her sister out of the den Otterspeck walked over to see Crookedfern with Fishpetal kits . Rustwater had disppered he limped back to his den only to see Shadepatch at the enterance.

Otterspeck quickly pulled him inside, " Shadepatch what doing here? "

Shadepatch sighed, " I saw Fishpetal body Mothsea told me what happen . I know who the father is."

Otterspeck looked him ,"Who is it?"

Shadepatch sighed, " Its me Otterspeck i'm the kits father."

Otterspeck looked at Badgerback in shock,"Your the father b-but I thought -."

Shadepatch sighed," Otterspeck I'm sorry it was an accident Fishpetal she cornered me . Saying Rustwater was abusing her she lied but I mated with her anyways. It was stupid for me to do."

Otterspeack felt fury tears brimming his eyes," YOU CHEATED ON ME ! EVEN IF RUSTWATER WAS ABUSING HER DOESN'T ME YOU GO OFF AND HAVE KITS WITH FISHPETAL!"

Shadepatch step back," Otterspeack please clam down someone might hear us."

Otterspeack ignored him he thought of what him and Shadepatch been though ,"CALM DOWN WHY SHOULD I! HAVEN'T YOU ALSO FORGOTTEN FAWNKIT AND TROUTKIT OUR KITS THEY SO YOUNG AND SICK AND NOW THEIR DEAD ! SO YOU FIND ANOTHER SHE CAT TO REPLACE ME AND THEM WITH ! ", He stopped his voice soften, " I thought you loved me."

Shadepatch soften nuzzling him," Of course I haven't forgotten about them and I know thier death has taken a toll on you and your metal state."

He had forgotten about his PTSD and how it effected him after his kits died but he knew what Shadepatch was doing . He using his illness against him . He pulled away from the nuzzle, " How dare you trying to use my metal state against me just so you can muplite me for own personal gain. "

Shadepatch smirked, " Wow you really are stupid you think I loved you . You see ever since your mother dearest there became Leader I wanted power or at least my blood within the line of the leader .Since Flowerkit died and Mothsea was already taken .You were mouse - brain enough to fall in love with me and get yourself pregnant with my kits. So I helped you hide it until the day they came and died and you who fault it is." Shadepatch's smirk to a look of fury . Otterspeck backed up sacred of what the tom will do to him. " Its yours Otterspeack your the reason our kits are dead."

Otterspeack yowled,"MY FAULT THE DEATH OF OUR SON AND DAUGHTER IS MY FAULT! LEAVE I NEVER WANT SEE YOU AGAIN! Shadepatch padded away not looking Otterspeck in the eye as he left. Otterspeck went and pepared Fishpetal's body when heard pawsteps behind him he growled ,"I thought I told you-." But cut himself off when he turned to see Blizzardsting,"Oh Blizzardsting how may I help you?"

Blizzardsting turn to him her blue eyes peiring his fur,"I heard about Fishpetal and that they not Rustwater's kits . Do have any ideas who kits they are?"

Otterspeck try not show fear,"No ,Fishpetal use to go to the twoleg place a lot maybe they are a kittypets kits."

He could tell she wasn't buying it," I'm not mouse - brain I heard you and Shadepatch's little fight . It good thing I killed Fawnkit and Troutkit before they could see your messed up relationship."

Otterspeck looked at Blizzardsting in horrified way ," How did know about my kits . The only cats that knew were Mothsea,Shadepatch,and-."

Blizzardsting smiled cutting him off, " and Crookedfern I overheard you and her talking about your kits. So to get more information about your secret I thearten to kill her kits . Poor Echokit and Ebonykit didn't even know what was going on. "

Otterspeck took step back,"What are you talking about?" Why would Blizzardsting want know about his kits . The memory of there small sickly bodies in the sand with the cold wind blowing on thier fur like they still alive .Flashed back to him leaving a bottomless pit of sorrow in his stomach . But she couldn't have she a deputy why would she kill innocent kits?

Blizzardsting laughed, "You see those herbs you gave Fishpetal were lace with poison reeds the plan was to kill her and for you and Shadepatch to get into a fight. Then I did the same with you but I gave you a small dose so it only got to the kits which killed them a couple sunrises later. But only doing to protect you. Shadepatch was is using you and those kits would have ruined your life."

Otterspeck want to throw up his kits were not dead because they were sick and because the weather. But they were poisoned by her,"You -YOU KILLED MY KITS !YOU POISON ME AND KILLED THEM! TROUTKIT AND FAWNKIT ARE DEAD BECAUSE OF YOU ! Why -Why would do that to me?"

Blizzardsting wrap her tail around him and whispered into his ear,"Because I love you every since Shadepatch and you became mates in secret I've been furious! I will not stop until I have killed everyone you love . One by one till you only have me I wanted a family with you Otterspeck I always have ,I will never hurt you, I'll take care of you." Otterspeck stepped back anger, fury, pain filled his body.

He cried, "GET AWAY FROM ME YOU MURDER!

She smirked," It okay dear I'll see you soon my love." He watch as she left the den . He quickly limped out camp ignoring the call of his clan mates. He finally saw two little rock towers his kits graves. He let out a wail of agony, pain,and sorrow he lost so much his kits ,his mate,his father, and his mentor.

He he let out another painful wail before yowling" Fawnkit,Troutkit Im so sorry !" He start to quietly hum to himself the same tone he hummed to his kits when they were still alive . He slowly started feel his eyes get heavy before falling asleep .

The first chapter finshed sorry it took so long. This first one chapter was sad so I hope I didn't make you guys cry. But thank for reading the next chapter is Silverdusk.