ACT TWO
INT. SG COMMAND-INFIRMARY
SAM
...so, anyway...in the time it took us to drag you away from Tollan,
even though you asked us not to, and detain you here, even though you asked
us not to, your 'Gate's been sealed under tons of volcanic debris and you're
cut off from your world forever. Our official position on this is, "Oops."
And the General owes me a plane.
OMOC
You said you had good news and bad news.
DANIEL
Oh. Uh...the bad news is, that bowl of fruit in the middle of the
buffet table was just a centerpiece. It's actually all plastic. You might
want to pass that along to your people.
INT. SG COMMAND-BRIEFING ROOM
JACK
Maybe we should try calling in some markers. I know some worlds
that owe me big from that intragalactic game of Fizzbin last week.
DANIEL
Fizzbin? Isn't that where you just made up the rul-
JACK
Shut up, kid.
HAMMOND
Okay. Colonel, you follow up on that. Pay a...visit to some of
our old friends and take a big guy like Teal'c with you, if you know what
I mean.
Daniel frowns to himself but keeps his mouth shut.
HAMMOND
(continued)
Captain Carter, I want you and Dr. Jackson to get the multi-purpose
room on 5-C ready as a refugee housing center. Take down the door decorations,
clear the dealers' tables, relocate the art show-you know the drill.
INT. SG COMMAND-5-C.
The room has been partitioned into cubicles, offering a modicum of privacy. One idiot's alarm clock will still wake everybody else up, unfortunately.
HAMMOND
As an act of good faith, we're returning the devices you were wearing.
OMOC
The whatyercallits? They are not weapons.
DANIEL
Well, actually, we couldn't figure out exactly what they were.
HAMMOND
(under his breath)
...so we're even more suspicious and primitive than you already
thought we were. Good going, boy.
(louder)
But I want you to understand, you're restricted to the immediate
premises.
OMOC
Are we prisoners?
DANIEL
N-no! Yes! Pass!
INT. SG COMMAND-5-C, NARIM'S CUBICLE
SAM
Hey-how're you doing?
NARIM
Um...it may sound ridiculous, but I have no idea how this bed works,
could you show me, nudge nudge wink wink?
SAM
Oh, that's just a pillowcase; I'll show you later. You might like
to take a look at this first.
NARIM
Oh. Er, sure.
SAM opens the cat carrier to let out SCHROEDINGER.
NARIM
I never thought I'd see a living animal. So it's not all just stock
footage, then?
SAM
(shrugging)
Cats are cheaper, I guess. His name's Schroedinger. You know, Heisenburg,
Bohr, Charm and Strange?
NARIM
Ahh. Molest me not with this pocket calculator stuff.
Omoc enters, annoyed because he has no lines in this scene.
SAM
Cheese it, the old man! Later.
(exits)
NARIM
I did not tell her anything.
(beat)
Hey! There is a profusion of orange hair all over this mattress.
