The Train Job

"You're move," said Jayne.

Mal reached over and moved his game piece across the board.

"That's a bold move," said Zoë.

"I live on the edge," said Mal taking a drink.

"Riiight," said Janelle sitting down at the table.

Zoë smiled as she moved her piece across the board.

"Nice work, dumb ass," said Jayne.

"Oh, it's okay. He's just new to strategy," said Janelle.

Mal smirked at her as she giggled. "I've given some thought to moving off the edge. Not an ideal location. Might get a place in the middle."

"A toast!" shouted a man.

"Toast!" shouted another. "Quiet!"

"Shut up!" shouted the first man.

"Oh, no," said Janelle.

The bar got quiet as the man started to speak.

"I'm uh – I got words," he said. "I'm saying this is an "ass-picious" day. We all know what day it is."

"Suspicious? What say is it?" said Jayne slightly confused.

"Auspicious," said Janelle.

"Oh…what" said Jayne.

"Nothing," said Janelle rolling her eyes.

"A glorious day for all the proud members of the allied planets," said the man. "Unification Day!"

"This is gonna get ugly, isn't it?" asked Janelle, looking at Zoë.

"The end of the scumbag independents and the dawn of a new galaxy," said the man.

"Yeah!" shouted a few people in the bar.

Mal turned back to the table and grabbed his glass.

"Captain," said Zoë.

"Just feel the need for another drink," said Mal leaving the table.

"Yeah, it's gonna get ugly," said Janelle sipping her drink.

"What month is it?" said Jayne talking to himself.

Janelle rolled her eyes.

"Hey. You gonna drink the Alliance with me?" asked the man as Mal walked up to the bar. "Six years today the Alliance sent the Browncoats runnin' pissin' their pants. You know, your coat is kind of a brownish color," said the man looking at Mal's coat.

"It was on sale," said Mal taking a drink.

"You didn't toast," said the man. "You know, I'm thinkin' you're one of them independents."

"And I'm thinking you weren't burdened with an overabundance of schooling," said Mal. "So why don't we just ignore each other till we go away?"

"The independents were a bunch of cowardly, inbred piss pots," said the man. "Should've been killed off of every world spinnin'."

Mal slammed his glass on the bar and turned to the guy. "Say that to my face."

"I said…you're a coward and a piss pot," said the man standing to face Mal. "Now what are you gonna do about it?"

"Nothing. I just wanted you to face me so she could get behind you," said Mal.

The man turned around and when he did Zoë hit him with the butt of her gun.

"Drunks are so cute," said Mal. "Oh. Mǔqīn tuófēng gǒu niang yǎng de.

"Jayne?" said Zoë.

"Hey, I didn't fight in no war," he said kicking his feet up on the table. "Best o'luck, though."

"You're so nice," said Janelle shoving his feet off.

"What? I didn't," he said. "And I suppose you didn't either, although I wouldn't surprise me if you did. I'm sure you one of the most armed people in here."

"And if I am?" she said looking at him over her glass.

"Could come in handy, is all," he said looking away from her.

Janelle laughed as she turned to watch the fight unfold. It was only when Mal was tossed through the holographic window did Jayne get up and do something.

"Looks like it's time to go," she said standing up.

Janelle picked her way through the crowd and out the door without someone stopping her. Once all four of them were outside the crowd started edging them towards the edge of a cliff.

"Whoa-oa. Ha ha. Ha," said Mal as he looked over the edge. "There's just an acre of you fellas, isn't there?" He turned to Zoë, "This is why we lost you know. Superior numbers."

"Thanks for the reenactment, sir," she said breathing heavily.

The man who'd made the toast walked to the front of the crowd and pulled a gun.

"Hey, hey. Them ain't "kosherized" rules," said Jayne stepping in front of Janelle slightly.

"I'm thinkin' somebody needs to you down, dog," he said. "What do you think?"

"I'm thinkin' we'll rise again," said Mal.

Janelle just looked over at him. As he said that Wash flew up behind them with the ship and opened the airlock.

"Every man there go back inside or we will blow a new crater in this little moon," he said over the loud speaker.

The crowd slowly dissipated back into the bar as the four of them climbed aboard the ship. Mal waved at them as Wash started to fly away.

"Damn yokels can't even tell a transport ship ant got no guns on it," said Jayne.

Janelle rolled her eyes.

"Blow a new crater in this moon," said Jayne laughing.

Janelle laughed as she made her way to her room. She needed a nap after all the excitement. Mal and Zoë went up to the bridge to talk to Wash. Jayne went to his own room.


"Do you want me to put it up?" asked Inara as she brushed Kaylee's hair.

"No, that's okay," said Kaylee.

"You have such lovely hair, said Inara.

"She's right Kaylee," said Janelle.

"I'm sure the doctor would agree," said Inara smiling.

"Who? Simon? No, he's much too – I mean...I'm just – Do you think it looks better up?" asked Kaylee.

"We can experiment," said Inara. "We might even get wild later and wash your face."

All three women laughed at the joke.

"Do you ever do this for your clients?" asked Kaylee.

"Very occasionally. Not all of them have enough hair to get a brush through," said Inara.

"Have you ever had to service a really hideous client?" asked Kaylee. "With boils and the like?"

Inara chuckled. "A Companion chooses her own clients. That's guild law," she said. "But physical appearance doesn't matter so terribly. You look for compatibility of spirit. There's an energy about a person that's difficult to hide. You try to feel that…"

"Then you try to feel the energy of their credit account," said Mal walking into the shuttle. "It has a sort of aura."

"What did I say to you about barging into my shuttle?" asked Inara.

"That it was manly and impulsive?" said Mal.

Janelle laughed and Mal smirked at her.

"Yes, precisely. Only the exact phrase I used was don't," said Inara.

"Well, you're holding my mechanic in thrall, and, Kaylee what's going on in the engine room?" said Mal. "Were there monkeys? Some terrifying space monkeys maybe got loose?"

"I had to rewire the grav thrust because somebody won't replace that crappy compression coil," she said.

"Well get the place squared away," said Mal. "It's dangerous in there and I aint payin you to get your hair played at."

Kaylee muttered something in Chinese as she walked out of the room.

"We work before we play," said Mal as she walked out. He turned back to Inara. "You're servicing crew now?"

"In your lonely, pathetic dreams," said Inara. "What do you want?"

"We have a job," he said.

"Congratulations," said Inara. "Tis job wouldn't be on a decently civilized planet where I could screen some respectable clients, perhaps?"

"Respectable clients. That seems a contradiction," said Mal. \

"Don't start," said Inara.

"There's um…," said Mal. "We haven't got a location yet. We'll be landing on a skyplex in a bit. Run by a fella called Niska."

"Never heard of him," said Inara.

"Well, I have, and while we're there you'll stay confined to the ship," said Mal. "And that goes for you too, Janelle."

"Don't worry," she said. "I'm staying put this time."

"Is the petty criminal perhaps ashamed to be riding with a Companion?" asked Inara.

"Niska has a very unlovely rep," said Mal. "He's got work for me, fine. But I don't…I'm not sure you'd be safe."

"Mal, if you're being a gentleman, I may die of shock," said Inara.

"Hmm," said Mal as he bowed and then headed for the door. "Have you got time to do my hair?" he asked walking back in.

"Out," said Inara.

"You need to heed his warning about Niska," said Janelle standing up. "I've heard of Niska and believe me, it's not a pretty story."

"I'm sure. Are you ready?" asked Inara.

"Yeah," said Janelle taking her hair down from the tight bun she'd put it in that morning.

"Wow, your hair is long," said Inara.

Janelle's hair fell down past her shoulders and stopped at her back. She shook it out to make sure it wasn't tangled or still wrapped around itself as she sat down on the floor. Inara sat on the couch behind her and started to run a brush through her hair.

"Is this why you always keep it up?" asked Inara.

"Part of the reason," said Janelle.

"What's the other part?" asked Inara.

"The way I was brought up," she said. "WE were told to keep our hair off our shoulders. So I found ways to keep it up and look pretty."

"You have very pretty hair," said Inara. "I think you should wear it down more often."

"Maybe," said Janelle. "Depends."

"On Jayne?" asked Inara.

"Why would it depend on him?" asked Janelle.

"I've see the way you look at him," said Inara. "You like him."

"He's intriguing," said Janelle. "But I don't like him."

"So why did you stay on the ship?" asked Inara. "Simon is the medic for the ship and River is with him, the shepherd thinks he's doing missionary works, and then there is you…so why?"

Janelle didn't say anything. The truth was that she did stay on the ship because of Jayne. She couldn't fix anyone and didn't have the excuse of God for her to stay, but she did. Mal really didn't care because she paid him and that's all that mattered to him. Inara finished brushing her hair and pulled some of it back with a pin.

"There," she said. "It looks good like that."

"Thank you," said Janelle standing up. "I'll see you later."

Inara nodded as Janelle walked out of the shuttle.


"Hello Shepherd," said Janelle walking into the dining area.

"Oh, hello Janelle," he said.

"Want some company?" she asked making some tea.

"Sure," he said with a smile.

Janelle smiled and walked over to the table.

"I wonder how it's going," she said.

"Who knows," he said. "Inara said I should pray for them, but I'm just not sure Captain Reynolds would appreciate it."

Janelle chuckled. "What he doesn't know won't hurt him. And I think it would help. They are working for a terrible man."

"Who?" asked Book.

"A man called Niska," she said. "He has a horrible reputation, especially if people don't come through on a job. Believe me, they can use all the prayers they can get."

Book nodded as she stood up from the table. It was then that he noticed her hair was down instead of up in a bun.

"Your hair looks lovely," he said.

"Thank you," she said with a smile.

Janelle walked around the ship, ending up on the catwalk around the cargo bay. She watch Simon walk away and could only assume that Jayne had been a douche to him, again. She sighed as she walked over to River and sat down.

"Hey," she said.

River turned to look at her.

"You shouldn't be here," she said. "He's worried about you."

"I, uh, I don't think so," said Janelle.

"You should tell him," said River. "You could help them."

Janelle smiled as she stood up. She liked River, even if she was a bit loopy. She watched as Jayne jumped through the opening in the floor of the ship and on to the train. She had a feeling it was only going to get more interesting as the day went on.


Janelle ran down the stairs to where Kaylee was standing as Jayne came up from the train.

"Ahh! God!" said Jayne as the crates hit the ground.

"Where are the others?" asked Kaylee.

"They shot my gorram leg!" he said falling off the crates.

"Jayne? Are they still on the train?" asked Kaylee. "Are they gonna be okay?"

"Simon!" shouted Janelle as she reached the two of them.

Simon came running through the door. "What?"

"Looks like you've got a patient," said Janelle looking at Jayne's leg.

"I'm fine," he said.

"Bullshit," she said. "Let's get you upright."

Janelle got under one of his arms while Simon got under the other. They slowly walked him to the infirmary so Simon could look at his leg.


"Well?" asked Janelle when Simon was done?"

"He'll live," said Simon.

Janelle nodded and walked into the infirmary.

"How you feeling?" she asked Jayne.

"Peachy," he said looking over at her. "How many of them dresses do you got?"

Janelle looked down at the earth green dress she was wearing. "What are you talking about?"

"You wore that when we were dealing with Patience," he said.

She smiled. "I've got a few of them in different colors. Mostly in earth tones. Helps me blend into a crowd."

'Why do you need to hide in a crowd?" he asked sliding off the table.

"You are the only ones who don't want to be found sometimes," she said watching him limp around the room. "Should you be doing that?"

"I'm fine," he said limping out of the room.

Janelle sighed as she, too, left the room.

"What are you doing?" asked Inara.

"Nothin," said Janelle.

"Jayne can be a bit…" started Inara.

"He's s juéjiàng de lǘzi," said Janelle.

"He is that too," chuckled Inara. "Come to my shuttle. I've got some tea that might help with your mood.

Janelle nodded and followed Inara to the shuttle.


"Hey. How'd it go?" asked Kaylee walking up to the shuttle.

"She hit me," said Mal pointing to Inara.

Janelle laughed from where she was sitting on the stairs with Jayne.

"We tried to get him into the infirmary," said Kaylee. "He's just heavy."

"That's an understatement," said Janelle.

"Hey," slurred Jayne.

Kept the engine running," said Wash. "We're good to go."

"We're not going," said Mal.

"Not – What? Not – Why?" asked Wash.

"We're bringing the cargo back," said Zoë.

"What?" said Janelle and Jayne.

"What do you mean back? I waited for you guys!" shouted Jayne.

"Hush, you'll hurt yourself," said Janelle.

"What are you talking about? What about Niska?" asked Wash. "Wont this put him in more or less a killing mood?"

"There's others need this more," said Mal. "Let's get it on the mule."

"My shuttle's faster," said Inara.

"You risked enough flying in there once. And I don't want to get slapped no more," said Mal. "Far as Niska goes, we'll explain to him the job went south and return the money."

"You wanna explain, now's your chance," said Wash.

Everyone turned to look out the airlock to see an ominous looking group of men walking up. Janelle slid herself behind Jayne to lean up against the wall. Everyone else seemed to take collective step back.

"You didn't make the rendezvous," said the man.

"Ran into a few complications," said Mal.

"You were thinking of taking Mr. Niska's money, and his property , maybe," said the Russian.

"Uh, interestingly, neither," said Mal.

"I don't understand," said the Russian.

"Yeah. Look. Here's what it is. Deal's off," said Mal. "We changed our minds."

"You entered into an arrangement with Mr. Niska," said the Russian. "There is no mind changing."

"I'm afraid that's where you're wrong," said Mal. "We – we just – We can't take this job. So you just relax. We'll get you the money Niska gave us, you return it, and we'll call it even."

"There is no even," said the Russian.

"Is that right?" said Mal.

The Russian threw his dagger and hit Mal in the shoulder. Zoë tossed off her coat and pulled out her gun and started shooting. Inara grabbed Kaylee and pulled her behind one of the giant crates that was sitting in the cargo bay. Wash snuck his way around so he could climb on the mule. He revved the mule and ran over the guy guarding the exit. Janelle pulled her legs up to her chest trying to make herself smaller to hide behind Jayne's prone form some more.

There was a gun shot and the large Russian man fell to the ground. Every turned to see Jayne with his gun in his hand.

"Nice shot," said Mal.

"I was aiming for his head," slurred Jayne.

Mal and Zoë packed up the medicine crates and loaded them onto the mule and rode out of the ship. Inara and Kaylee went to check on Wash. Janelle extended her legs and started to stand.

"Where were you?" slurred Jayne. "They could've used your help."

"I couldn't help," said Janelle leaning over to grab his upper arm. "You got to help me or you're going to be stuck here."

Jayne used all the strength he had to help her help him to his feet. They slowly made their way down the stairs. They paused at the bottom of the stairs so Janelle could adjust her grip on him and to catch her breath. The trek across the bay was slow. It was only when they got through the door that Jayne asked her where they were going.

"You won't be able to climb down the ladder to your room, and if I just drop you down the hole you might hurt yourself" she said.

"So where are you taking since we by passed the infirmary," he said, the slur in his voice slowly dissipating.

"My cabin," she said.

"What?" said Jayne.

"It's all one level and I can drop you on the bed and leave you," she said. "And the only way you're going to hurt yourself is if you roll off the bed."

Janelle opened the door to her room and they slowly made their way to the bed. She helped him sit on the edge of the bed and when she let go of him he fell backwards. Luckily he didn't hit the wall.

"Sleep it off," she said walking out of the room.


Janelle was standing at the edge of the air lock when Mal and Zoë returned.

"How are our prisoners?" asked Mal.

"Yelling in Russian," she said. "He hasn't shut up since he woke up."

Mal nodded. Zoë and Wash brought the large Russian outside and dropped him to his knees. Janelle watched from just inside the ship.-

"Now, this is all the money Niska gave us in advance," said Mal holding up a wad of cash. "You bring it back to him. Tell him the job didn't work out.

The Russian spit on Mal.

"We're not thieves. But we are thieves," he said. "Point is, we're not taking what's his. We'll stay out of his way as best we can from here on in. You explain that's best for everyone. Okay?"

The Russian stood up despite the bullet hole in his leg. "Keep the money. Use it to buy a funeral. It doesn't matter where you go or how far you fly," he said. "I will hunt you down, and the last thing you see will be my blade."

"Darn," said Mal.

Mal lifted his leg and kicked the Russian in the chest. This sent him stumbling backwards until he was caught up in the suction from the engine. His body was pulled through the large turbines. Janelle cringed and left them to their business.

Not long after she made it to the dining area they were up in there and leaving the world. Janelle grabbed a cup and poured herself some tea. She walked over to the lounge area and laid down on the couch. She opened her book and started to read. At some point she fell asleep. She was woken up by someone shaking her.

"What are you doing up here?" asked Mal.

"I fell asleep" she said sitting up.

"Why didn't you go to your bunk?" he asked.

"Jayne's in there," she said. "I didn't want to drop him down the hole to his room do I left him in mine. I'm fine sleeping here."

"Well, I'm not," said Mal. "Come on."

Mal leaned over and picked Janelle up and started to walk out of the room.

"I can walk, you know," she said.

"It's easier and quicker if I just carry you," said Mal.

Mal set her down in front of the door to her room. He slid it open and looked around. Jayne wasn't in there.

"Looks like you get your bed after all," said Mal. "Sleep well. And don't fall asleep on the couches anymore. They aren't all that comfortable."

Janelle nodded and closed the door to her room. She stripped from her dress and pulled on her night shirt before she climbed in bed. She turned out the lights and smiled. It smelled like Jayne.