Scene 3
Ron: (staring in a stupor) it wasn't a dream.
Mr. Stevens: It better not be a dream, I'm gonna be rich!
Cho: Come here, quick!
(Harry, Ron and Mr. Stevens run over to Cho).
Narrator: Ever since the animals disappeared, Cho had been listening to the WWN whenever she got the chance.
Cho: Listen...
Radio Broadcaster: Today is a sad, sad day in history, folks! Butcher shops everywhere are closing down and people protesting animal cruelty have absolutely nothing to do!
Ron: I didn't know this would happen!
Radio Broadcaster: This summer is going to be a warm one! And more so, since the production of dairy products such as Ice Cream is at a standstill!
Harry: NOOOOOOOO!
Cho: No more ice cream? That is totally going to ruin my little sister's birthday party next week!
(Cho walks off, shaking her head sadly).
Mr. Stevens: No! Wasted money? I just opened a new ice cream stand in the Zoo!
(He storms off to the Crumple-Horned Snorkack's tank).
Harry: Ron, we made a terrible mistake!
Ron: (Sadly) I know...
Harry: How did this happen? It was just a stupid wish...
Sad Zoo Visitor: Hey, mister! Where are the Snidgets? I want to see the Snidgets!
Ron: They're all gone, kid, sorry...
Sad Zoo Visitor: No Snidgets?
(Sad Zoo Visitor begins to cry and runs off).
Harry: Now, because of us, that little kid will never get to see the Snidgets!
Ron: I miss Malalacla Maclaw!
Narrator: But missing animals isn't the only one of Harry and Ron problems...
(Mr. Stevens walks over).
Mr. Stevens: Sorry, boys, but I'm going to have to fire you. Since the only animal left is Skippy, we're going to need fewer people.
Ron: This really stinks, Harry! That dumb wish shouldn't even have come true. I don't even know how it did...
Harry: Skippy. We were talking to Skippy when we made the wish! Come on!
(Harry runs over to Skippy's tank and Ron follows him).
Narrator: In order to figure out how the wish came true, Ron decides to try talking to Skippy.
Ron: How did you make our wish come true?
Skippy: eeeeee
Ron: What?
Skippy: eeeeee
Ron: What?
Skippy: eeeeee
Ron: What?
Skippy: eeeeee
(Long pause).
Ron: What?
Harry: That's enough, Ron, we can't understand him.
Ron: I wish everything was back to normal... (pause) Come on, you stupid, overgrown lump of flesh! Make everything better again!
(Blaise, Pansy and Draco walk up behind Harry and Ron at Skippy's tank).
Draco: (Sneering) Hey, look - the last three animals on Earth.
Pansy: Animals should be together in times of need.
Blaise: I agree.
(Blaise and Draco push Harry and Ron into Skippy's tank and laugh).
Narrator: Harry and Ron crawl back out of the dolphin tank to a big surprise...
(Bob and Ralph crawl out of the tank and look around. All of the animals are back in their cages).
Ron: All of the animals are back!
Pansy: What're you talking about?
(Mr. Stevens runs over).
Mr. Stevens: What are you doing? Don't you EVER throw Clabbert poop! Blaise, Pansy, Draco... you three are FIRED!
Blaise: But-
Draco: That's not fair!
Pansy: NOOOOO!
(Blaise, Pansy and Draco stomp off angrily and muttering curses).
Mr. Stevens: You can never get good help these days...
Harry: (puzzled) Clabbert poop? (Pause) That happened, like, three days ago.
Mr. Stevens: What? What're you talking about?
Ron: All of the animals are back!
Mr. Stevens: What're you talking about? They were never gone. They've always been here.
Ron: Are we re-hired?
Mr. Stevens: Re-hired? You were never fired. Are you boys all right? You seem as though you've knocked a few screws loose.
Harry: We've never been better, sir!
Mr. Stevens: Good, now GET TO WORK! I told you to clean the Snidget cages at least four times already!
Ron and Harry: (simultaneously) With pleasure!
