I'm thrilled by the amount of emails from that I'm getting, haha. Thanks so much for your support! Also please check out my other fics. I'm still working on updating them, probably this weekend, but take a look. In this chapter, I decided to write Rachel's letter. I'm trying to make Allie's, Rachel's, and Finn's voices different, although Allie is going to sound a lot like Rachel.
I can't start this with "Dear" something, because I don't know who you are or where you are.
The first thing I want you to know is that I'm proud of you. Prouder than proud. Knowing me, I'm sure you're a star singer, and probably misunderstood and hated for your brilliant personality. It was like that for me in high school, too.
The second thing I want you to know is… I'm sorry. I can't believe I gave you up, after all I'd been through. The thing is, my biological mother put me up for adoption too. It hurt, especially when I met her and we didn't click. It just felt wrong. I want you to know that you're a special part in my heart. I'm sure you have a wonderful family now. Love them. They're always there for you, because they love you. I'm always here for you too.
You're probably wondering who I am, so here goes.
My name is Rachel Berry. I went to NYADA and now, eleven years after graduating there, my stardom has been a bit toned down. I used to be an insufferable know-it-all with an obsession with rising to the top. I still am, at heart, but I've learned that sometimes a little goes a long way. It took years of hard work and rejection letters to help me understand that.
To answer the inevitable question, yes. Your biological father and I are still together. His name is Finn Hudson, and he's the love of my life. He's the most amazing guy you could ever want, and I know that he would be an incredible father for you, if we kept you.
Damn, that sounds bad. It sounds like we left you on purpose. Trust me, it was painful. I cried, and so did Finn. After we signed all the paperwork and they took you away, we just held each other and cried. You were such a beautiful baby, with my brown eyes and Finn's lopsided smile. The only consolation we had was that you would be given many more opportunities than we could ever give you.
I don't have any children now. Finn and I talk about it sometimes, but we're both so young. We never fully got over losing you.
I'm so proud of you. Really. Sometimes I imagine that you are there, that I could see you, and try to imagine what you must look like now. I was your age when I met Finn. Trust me, there was drama between us. A lot of drama. Tons of break-ups, and fights, and shooting each other down… but we defeated it in the end. He proposed on your fifteenth birthday. He says that it wasn't on purpose, but I think it was.
It was a way of bringing the cycle back around. A sense of closure. We'll never forget you, okay? And I hope I'm still on your mind sometimes. If we ever get to meet… don't call me Mom. Call me Rachel. And maybe you can meet your grandmother Shelby and your aunt Beth and your uncle Kurt.
I don't know what even possessed me to sit down and write this letter. It just felt like something I had to do. So I'm going to fold this up and tuck this away in the shoebox that has your hospital ID bracelet and a DVD of your first sonogram. Maybe someday you'll read it.
Until then,
Rachel Berry
So what do you think? I think it was a little bit shorter than Allie's letter was. Next I'm probably going to do a bit from Allie's point of view, like a day in her life, to see what it's like. After that, it'll probably be Finn's letter… and then we'll see. Read and review!
