In high school, the bullies were a bit more hardcore. As in, they were really all up in my face and didn't care. I was also exposed to a lot of peer pressure. I was pressured to smoke, do drugs and drink alcohol and I gave in. I really regretted doing those things. I should've backed out and just enjoyed my life as a young teen. Unfortunately, I didn't know any better. I never gave in to premarital sex, though. Because even Nate didn't want to do it. I was really lucky to have such an amazing boyfriend who understood and believed in the same things I did.

In the middle of freshman year, I began to get along with the bullies. I'm not sure if it was because I gave in to peer pressure, or because I just kind of changed. Either way, we became good friends. One of them was named Angeline. She was like the sidekick, and was one of the closest one to me. The "head bully" is a girl named Roxanne. She's one, if not the meanest of the bunch. But as I got to know her, I learned that she wasn't that bad, and was actually kind of a nice person to be with.

As I learned more about these bullies, I began to abandon Nate and Alyssa and started to hang out with them more. I became a bully myself. I would do those things that the bullies use to do to me. But, instead, I'd do them to other people. Like if one day, I somehow forgot my lunch money, I'd go to someone and steal theirs. Or if there was a person that I didn't like, I'd stuff them in to lockers and beat them up. Honestly, I wasn't sure why I even did these things. Maybe the feel of "revenge" sort of came upon me and it felt really good that I couldn't control myself.

Nate eventually talked to me about my behavior and told me that he didn't like it at all. Frankly at that time, I didn't really care what anyone said. Even my own mother told me that my behavior was bad. She also told me that I was very unreasonable when it came to why I even bullied in the first place.

After a few weeks of arguing, me and Nate broke up from a one and a half year relationship. It was probably for the best. I really didn't want to hurt Nate anymore. It was really sad seeing him the way he was.

Even after the break up, I was still hanging out with the bullies and not Alyssa. We did a lot of crazy stuff while we were together. We sniffed and drank lots of stuff and went to lots of parties. We spent some of our time doing some illegal things.

With all the stuff happening in my life, I surprisingly moved up to tenth grade, which was my sophomore year. It was also Angeline and Roxanne's last year, because they were seniors. When I entered this year, nothing changed. Everything was the same. I mean, I was still a bully and I was still not talking to Alyssa.

There was actually not one day in my life where I didn't think about missing Alyssa. I missed talking and hanging out with her so much. She had been hanging out with these people whom she thought were her friends. But, they were not really. I knew them, and they had connections with Roxanne's group. So, obviously, they were just trying to mess with Alyssa. Although I knew, I just brushed it off and told myself it wasn't such a big deal, unless it was really going to harm Alyssa, which I didn't think it was going to.

I went through my sophomore year, the same way I went through my freshman year. Like a mean bully who didn't know any better. I did everything the same. I'd steal people's lunch money if I forgot mine, stuff them in to lockers, beat them up and all those things.

One day in particular, was very different from the rest. I heard about some people from Roxanne's gang meeting in an alley way and murdering someone. Hearing the news from people, I broke down in to tears. I realized that what I've gotten to was very wrong. I tried to hide my emotions from them and just acted normal. I still hung out with them, but I wasn't much of a bully anymore. I still didn't talk to Alyssa much, but I would occasionally greet her in the hallways.

So, as months passed, I kept hearing news about how bad Roxanne's gang was getting. I got more worried as I heard these things. I knew that I had to try and find a way to escape the madness. I didn't want to be part of such a heinous group anymore. At some point in that year, I realized the things I was getting in to. I didn't like it all.