Disclaimer: Touhou belongs to Zun, and the only things that belong to myself would be Usagi the mimic, and Moegi the japanese beetle. Everything else belongs to their rightful owner.

Y/N: You know, I have been thinking about something.

A/N: Do you do that often?

Y/N: Of course! How rude...

A/N: You make it sound as if you're any less rude to me.

Y/N: I've been thinking about your sexuality.

A/N: ...And?

Y/N: I think you may not be nearly as strait as you once believed.

A/N: But... I'm bi?

Y/N: Yes, but you also say that you lean towards strait.

A/N: ...So?

Y/N: You have a crush on two women.

A/N: And a boyfriend whom I would do anything for!

Y/N: Two against one.

A/N: Tch...

Y/N: So, why don't you come out of the closet?

A/N: A closet in which I am already out of.

Y/N: Just admit that you like women more than men!

A/N: Never!

Y/N: So you admit that you aren't admitting it!

A/N: Now you're just grasping at straws.


A/N: Well, this has been my shortest chapter in a long time!


Some time in the past:

As we ate breakfast one morning, and I spooned baby food into our daughter's unwilling mouth, my husband thought aloud, "You know what we need? A dog."

Pausing a moment mid-flight with the plane-like spoon, I resumed flight soon after I realized that I had stopped. "Dear, whatever do we need a dog for? They are far from hygienic, enjoy eating whatever they happen to find, and die too quickly to grow all that attached to."

Sighing, he stopped eating. "Dear, little Rika has no friends. If not a dog, what do you recommend? Are you going to build her a friend?"

Setting down the plane-spoon, I as well sighed, asking, "Do you really think I haven't noticed them picking on her? But would a dog really be wise in the long run?"

Raising a brow, he asked, "What do you mean?"

Sighing once more, I answered, "I mean that the dog will die. If it's her only friend, will she be able to take that loss if she becomes overly invested in it?"

Slumping his shoulders, my love asked, "What choice do we have? Even if she managed to make a friend, we move too often for her to keep them. A dog can come with us wherever we go."

Sighing yet again, I said, "Fine. A dog it is. ...But what of a name?"

Now that I had stopped trying to feed her, and was no longer paying attention, Rika began to awkwardly clutch the spoon and use it to eat the slop that one feeds a baby. As she did this, my husband offered, "How about... Alpha?"

Snorting, I asked, "The first letter of the greek alphabet?"

Smiling sadly, he said, "It will be the first, but certainly not the last, if things keep up like they are..."


Present day:

Sighing, I removed the tape about the tank from the tape recorder. Leafing through to the front of the of the tapes, I placed it back from where I had gotten it, before picking the next in order. Reading it aloud, I said, "Bakebake, huh? Sounds Japanese... Still don't get how these things are in English if they live in japan. They don't even have an accent... Maybe they're multilingual? Best explanation I can come up with anyways...

Shoving the tape into the door of the thing, I closed it and pressed play.

Rika: Mommy's a bit busy with inventin' stuff today, but Alpha's here with me! Isn't that right boy? ...Or are you a girl?

[woof]

Rika: I'm not sure either! [giggle] Well, hi again, whoever's listenin' to this! ...Then again, Mommy said we'd probly be the only ones listenin'! Uhh... Hi Mommy, Daddy, and me! Ahh, and Alpha! Whichever of us is listening, hi!

[arf]

Rika: I was talking to future Alpha, not you! ...Anyways, I should probably talk 'bout the weapnized souls I put together!

"...What? How does that even...? Ohh, whatever. They've said enough crazy stuff that I'm just gonna ignore that. Not like I have anyone to ask about it."

Rika: It's a pretty simple process, really!

[woof]

Rika: That's right, you just have to place the special hitaikakushi in them, and they start to form a solid body under it!

"...Hitaiwha?"

[bark]

Rika: Yeah, I guess I should. It's still a protype, but the way it works is it lets them hear you! It works as an artficial ear, and it's gotta be blessed so that it can touch them! It took a bunch of tries, but eventually I got it so that a soul followed my orders! Of course, the key compnent is finding a soul that'll listen to you!

[woof]

Rika: Aww, thanks, Alpha... I think you're pretty too! Anyways, I think that's all there is to it! See ya whoever you are!

[woof]

Rika: Ehe. Yeah, I'm looking forward to my birfday as well! Maybe Mommy and Daddy'll get me a whole lot of scrap and tools from the kappa! They always seem to have extra stuff.

"...Kappa? I wonder who that is?"

[arf]

Rika: Ohh yeah, I forgot to mention that! Let me just turn it back o-

I couldn't help but snort at that turn of events.

Rika: Well, turns out I forgot to turn it off! Anyways, I have one last thing to say! I'm working on making artficial souls out of metal! If everything turns out okay, I'll have all the bakebake I can make! Once I perfect it, I'll have all the friends I can make! Then maybe my birfday party'll have more than just famly, Alpha, and Mister Bakebake!