Chapter 3 Fresh Air Clears The Mind

The Next morning Lois woke up and went over to Stewie's cot. She sighed in relief as the young infant was still fast asleep.

She then nudged Peter gently.

Peter grunted slightly.

"Mummy I don't want to go to church." Peter moaned in his sleep.

Lois chuckled slightly."Peter come on wake up you fat lump." Lois said. "I'm making pancakes for breakfast."

"Peter then nearly jumped up into the air.

"Yayyyyyy Pancakes now please." Peter yelled out in excitment.

Lois just sighed at her husband

Rupert came flying out of nowhere and hit her in the face. Lois turned in the direction of where the Bear had come from and saw Stewie standing in the doorway with an irritated look on his face.

Lois then took her young son out of his cot.

"Well I think someone's fussy this morning." She remarked.

"OI woman where's my breakfast I've been calling you for several minutes and still you don't give food instantly. Stewie protested. "What does a baby have to do to get a liitle service around here."

He then slapped Lois across the face.

"Stewie no hitting mummy that's naughty." She said while tutting and shaking her head.

Peter then charged downstairs while weilding a knife and fork.

"PANCAKES, PANCAKES, PANCAKES YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY." Peter screamed.

"Well there goes one hungry customer." Lois commented.

Later that same morning the family went to the Park to get some fresh air and relax.

"Aww mn when are we going to get Ice Cream." Peter was saying.

"In a few minutes Peter just be patient." Lois retorted while rolling her eyes.

Peter then began annoying Meg by making loud farting noises.

"Ah dad stop making those noises." Meg shouted out in embarresment.

"Just ignore him Meg, Lois sighed. "It's just the way your dad is.

"Yeah I know, Meg groaned." "But he's just so annoying sometimes, Remember when we went to Chuck E Cheese.

Cutaway Gag

The Griffins excluding Peter were sitting at a table at Chuck E Cheese. Lois was currently looking at her watch with an anxious look on her face.

"Where is he?" She questioned in a nervous voice. "I told him to go to McDonald's and it's been two hours."

Peter then suddenly burst through the front door, He was completley naked and was absolutly drunk.

Sorry I'm late everybody," Peter explained in a slurred voice. "Tell me does anyone have a Pop Tart.

Meg just placed her hands over her face and rested her head down on the table.

Lois just shook her head and sighed.

Stewie who was over in the ball pool saw Peter and.

"Good god Fatman what have you done." Stewie squeeled in horror.

The young infant vomited while Chris was on a Wack A Mole Machine.

End Cutaway Gag.

Later on the Griffins were still at the park. Peter was currently hiding in a bush concealing a baseball bat and looking through a pair of binoculars.

"Peter what the hell are you doing?" Lois questioned in an amused voice.

"I'm looking out for Helen." Peter explained. If that fat bitch so much as comes charging at Stewie I'll whack her in the face with my good old baseball bat."

Lois just sighed while rolling her eyes.

"Peter get out of there we just need to keep a closer eye on Stewie and if she does come we run." Lois informed.

Lois then turned around and was shocked when she couldn't find Stewie there."

"Oh my god Stewie where are you?" She cried out in a horrified voice.

"Maybe he wondered off somewhere." Brian suggested.

"Then we'd better split up and find my baby quick before a certain fat psychotic bitch does." Lois explained in a nervous voice.

Stewie was currently down by a pond near the woods laughing his head off while talking to Rupert.

"Oh you know Rupert I shouldn't really be here all by my self but I can't be scared of a crazy fat woman. If she so much as pokes her head out I'll blow her brains out." Stewie commented.

Suddenly a large 5 year old boy was standing in front of Stewie. He wore a white shirt with red stripes on it and had brown spiky hair.

"Hay little baby. He said in a mocking voice. "You want your Teddy Bear to go for a swim?"

"Don't you even think about it." Stewie growled in a threatning voice.

"What's that." The boy replied "you do."

He then swiped Rupert out of Stewie's arms and threw him into the pond..

"HOW DARE YOU, YOU SON OF A BITCH." Stewie screamed in anger.

Before the older boy knew what was happening he was on the ground and having the living crap beat out of him by an enraged one year old.

After several minutes Stewie stopped beating the boy up. He was covered in bruises and cuts. Stewie then pulled out his mind control device and used it on the boy.

Stewie's voice echoed in his head.

"Now go into the pond and get Rupert then wash him on your clothes." The voice commanded.

The boy did as he was told. Stewie became seriously amused as the boy washed the wet Teddy Bear on his shirt. The young infant then picked up a twig and whacked the boy with it several times before grabbing Rupert.

"Now go run back to mummy." Stewie suggested in a mocking voice.

The boy then ran in the opposite direction crying his eyes out.

"Yeah that'll teach you to mess with Stewie Griffin you bastard." The young infant shouted.

Stewie then froze in fear as he heard a russeling noise right behind him. Stewie then slowly turned around as he heard large footsteps approaching him. The sounded as though they belonged to an obese person. Stewie shivered in fear as he decided to turn around completley.

"Please don't let it be Helen, Please don't let it be Helen." Stewie muttered to himself in a voice quivering with fear.

Stewie then fully turned around and screamed in terror which caused Peter to scream in terror as well.

"Holy Crap Stewie you gave me a fright." Peter panted.

"Yeah well you shouldn't have crept up on me like that you fat oaf." Stewie replied.

Peter then chuckled slightly.

"Anyway we'd better get back to the others or else Lois will think you've been kidnapped." Peter said.

"Does she seriously expect Helen to be hiding in this park." Stewie said. "I mean there are tons of people around here so she wouldn't be stupid enough to come charging through here and try to take me again."

"Yeah. Peter replied. "Besides if she did come through the bushes she'd warn you as you might say with a russel, russel, russel, russel, russel, russel."

Peter then suddenly noticed that as he was saying that there was a russeling sound that was growing louder. Peter's ear began to twitch as he turned around to face the nearby bushes.

Stewie's ears and hairs began twitching as well, The young infant then slowly turned around to face the bushes and began shaking in fear as an all to familiar figure came walking towards him, Helen then came walking out of the bushes with an evil grin on her face.

"PETER." Stewie screamed out.

He then leapt into the obese mans arms.

"Oh please fat man don't let her get me oh save me please fat one." Stewie said in a fearful voice.

Peter then glared up at Helen while shaking in fear slightly.

"What are you doing here you evil bitch?" Peter growled in an angry voice.

"Oh now is that really how you treat an old friend."' Helen stated in a sarcastic voice.

Stewie began laughing hystericaly.

"Friend listen Helen we are not friends and I'm most certainly not your son." Stewie retorted.

Helen's evil smile then faded.

"But you are my son and the fat bafoon holding you will give me you or suffer."

I'll never let you take Stewie away from us again you fat psychopath. Peter stated in a determined voice.

"Very well then." Helen growled in a low angry voice. "If you will not give me my baby then I shall take him by force."

She then charged at Peter, However before she could grab Stewie the young infant slipped out of his overalls and kicked Helen in the face. He then bit her in the arm and leapt into Peter's arms again.

"Right what are you waiting for Fat man run." Stewie cried out.

Peter then ran back towards the park not noticing that Helen was close behind.

(AN Well that was Chapter 3. As you can see Stewie learned his leason from the first story that it's never a good idea to face Helen with overalls on. Anyway as for Family Guy Fan writers suggestion for Stewie to fight Helen he'll do that next Chapter so we'll see how well a baby genius does against a crazy fat woman. See you all next next chapter and remember to read and review.)