Jeez! Sorry that this chapter is so crap-tastic! This chapter was a little derpy to write because there's only so much I can put into one chapter without overwhelming you guys! Anyway, I hope you guys like it anyway~ Keep up the rating, the review, and the favoriting! It seriously means a lot!
Your name is John Egbert and you are confused. Dave Strider said he loved you but he was joking. And when you accused him of joking, turning the whole situation into one big prank, you could feel your heart breaking a little when he went along with it, claiming it to be exactly what you perceived it as: a prank. You aren't sure why Dave would say something like that, prank or not. You've loved him for three years and you don't understand why you've continued to find affections for him. You can't shake the feel that you're too derpy of a guy to even hope to be in a relationship with him. Besides, you've already claimed to everybody that you are not a homosexual. You had hoped, when you told Karkat that, that you would start to believe it yourself. But who are you kidding, you're totally gay and you're in love with Dave Strider.
You just got out of your last class of the day and you're exhaling with relief. Boy, working towards your degree in ectobiology was really hard work! But just the thought of donning a crisp white coat and being able to work hands-on in a lab made it seem like these classes would be worth it. Luckily your day was open now and you wondered what you would be doing. Jade might want to work out and maybe the two of you could drive those long two hours to Rose and Dave's university and – your mind falters and you bite your bottom lip. Dave. You'd rather not think about him right now.
Ever since he admitted that he loved you – jokingly of course! – he has been scarce in both text messages and on Pesterchum. You had asked Rose about it once and she simply said that he was probably busy getting assignments in for his classes. You didn't realize that being a graphic design major was such hard work! But you figured Dave was probably working really hard so you didn't press Rose further on the matter. But that did not mean you did not wonder what was going on with him. You had tried to talk to Jade about it, but she didn't really know entirely what to say to help console you. And that was okay; you shouldn't be dumping your emotional turmoil on the sweet girl anyway! In lieu of Dave's absence, however, Karkat and you have developed a stronger friendship! The two of you talked a few nights a week, just kind of keeping another up to date and his anger is becoming less sporadic and vicious and more predictable and tolerable. You could even say he was turning into one of your best friends! Not to mention he's really kind of cute and though you told him that you weren't gay, you wonder if maybe-
No.
You frown to yourself as you make your way up the sidewalk towards your dorm. Even though Karkat was available and had past feelings of you, it isn't right to just stab Dave in the back like that. You've loved him for this long and just running off to another guy when you're hurt doesn't feel right. Especially when that guy was also Dave's roommate. The thought of Dave finding out that you and Karkat were hooking up made you uncomfortable and so you pushed the thoughts away hastily.
Your roommate is sitting behind his desk when you walk in the door and frankly, you aren't surprised. It's almost as if he never has much of a social life aside from those he talks to online. The only time you've ever seen him leave was to go to the bathroom. Did he even have classes? You aren't sure. All you know is that he's a computer science major and he's really good at hacking. You wonder if he's ever hacked into your computer before. But you don't bother to ask him. You don't like to ask him too many questions because he has also has a bipolar disorder and sometimes gets annoyed with you too quickly for your liking.
"Thup," He says as his usual greeting when he glances over at you. You nod quickly to him and offer him a polite smile, shutting the door and dropping your bookbag next to your own desk. Stepping over a thick rope of twisted cords that ran along the floor, you make your way to your bed and drag your old laptop onto your lap, flipping it up and turning it on. Immediately the screen lights up and Pesterchum loads, your chumroll revealing that Rose was online and so was Dave. For the first time in a long time. Your heart is suddenly beating a million beats per second and you cannot stop smiling. Elated, you make a soft noise of excitement that obviously tore your roommate from his concentration, because he turned around his chair to look at you.
"Jeguth, what the hell wath that noith about?"
You blush and look over at him, giving him an apologetic grin. "Sorry, Sollux, I just got excited when I saw that Dave was online."
With a sigh, Sollux lifted a dark brow. "It'th like you're in love with the guy. Perthonally, I think he'th a bit of a douthe."
"Oh, I am not! And besides, he's not that bad of a guy! You just gotta get to know him, that's all!"
"Whatever," Sollux said, obviously not in the mood to try and argue with you. You exhale, a little put-out by your roommate but you don't let that stop you from messaging Dave!
– ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering turntechGodhead [TG] –
EB: hey dave! :)
TG: oh hey egbert
EB: jeez you're never online anymore!
EB: what's the deeeeeeeeal? ::::?
TG: dude you need to stop talking to that spiderbitch
EB: oh come on, she's not that bad!
TG: yeah she is topic closed
TG: strider – 1 egbert – 0
EB: yeah ok well anyway!
EB: what's up?
TG: not much just relaxing i guess
EB: oh fun! i think. Hehehehe
EB: so i guess youve worked yourself into a coma then?
TG: yeah sure lets put it that way
EB: :?
TG: nothing whats up with you
EB: oh not much!
EB i just got out of class and am so ready for the weekend!
TG: oh yeah tomorrows friday isnt it
EB: yeah! i think jade and i are going to go see that new nic cage movie!
TG: have fun i guess
TG: i gotta go
EB: what!
EB: fine ok i'll just talk to you later!
TG: maybe
– turntechGodhead [TG] has ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB] –
Your name is John Egbert and you are staring at your computer screen. Your heart feels like its being crushed and there's this nearly intolerable pressure on your chest. You can't believe that it's happening but it is. You're losing your best friend.
