Why Can't I ?
***
By: Ryoko [a.k.a. Raiju]
***
Track 2
***
My legs have never hurt this much...
My arms have never felt this worn...
My heart has never sped this fast...
My head has never pounded this hard...
All of this because of him? All of this because I was running away from HIM?
I found myself at the Oceanside, MILES and MILES away from anything I could recognize. I was lost...both geographically, and emotionally. My heart was in a tizzy.
The ocean looked so calm this afternoon, and the darkening sun setting on the horizon of it only made the picture more serene. I fell to the cement, dangling my feet over the edge and watching the sun set, thinking deeply about what I'd seen and done all within a matter of a single day.
I randomly looked up, hearing the faint whimper of an animal close by. A black German shepherd stood in the alleyway close to me, whimpering from, what sounded like, hunger. I reached into my sweatshirt pocket and pulled out a few sticks of pocky that I'd forgotten to eat. I held it out, smiling the best I could and clicking my tongue until the dog trotted closer to me. She looked up at me, then sniffed the food, instantly grateful, and eating it as fast as he could.
"Sorry, that's all I have."
She looked up at me with large brown eyes, clouded over with pain and suffering, but now with new light. Like a new ray of hope. She was so thin, so underfed and uncared for...must've been abandoned.
My attention went back to the water in front of me, so calmly just sitting there... both me and his total stranger, basking in the glow of the twilight sun.
"Should I try to go back...? Even if I WENT back...I'd only be hurt more...I don't wanna see him so angry...but...I wanna be there for him...what should I DO?"
***
The loud blaring of a ship's horn woke me the next morning...while it was still dark. I sat up slowly, looking around. Still at the dock, the same dog laying beside me with his head up either due to the fact that I was up, or that the horn had woken him up as well. "I must've nodded off..." I looked down at my watch.
"1:52 am...damn. Well...guess I might as well get going..." I sighed heavily, standing and dusting myself off. I started to walk away from the docks, toward the alleyway. The dark was so cold...especially at night, in the middle of autumn.
I looked around when almost out of the darkness, seeing absolutely NOTHING familiar. I'm lost...oh shit...I'm lost...! "Where AM I?" I mumbled, stepping out into the street.
"Lost, kid?"
The intruding voice made me jump with surprise, before I spun around. Three or four people were standing in the alleyway a little ways from where I'd just come from. I backed up a step.
"N...no." I blurted out, taking another step back. I turned, breaking into a speedy walk, but one of the shadows was quicker than I and grabbed me by the wrist. "Ah! Let go! It hurts! Let go!" I yelped, trying to twist my arm out of the figure's grip. They let go almost immediately, just standing there.
From the dim light, I could make out a man, around 5'11", heavyset, bald with black eyes, staring down at me. And I was only a mere KID. His face was hard to see, but he looked at me in a way I really didn't like...
Me, being the dimwit I was, stood there holding my wrist and hissing in pain softly, watching his movements carefully. I stepped backward when he advanced, our steps slowly becoming quicker until I'd run myself into another alley. A dark one. With another guy that looked like he was gonna hurt me.
The other three of the group stood in the only opening to the alley, kind of covering it and watching as he started wrestling me to the ground, knocking over a trashcan in the process.
I felt as though I was going to be sick when my front hit the ground and my arms were held behind me. Taking advantage of my clouded thoughts, that contact with the pavement had caused, he bound my arms with his belt, rendering me almost completely helpless.
I shook my head, trying to get it to function again, regretting that I had. The moment my senses came back, I was wailing in agony, my organs being pushed up to my throat and my spine burning with pain. Oh god he hurt.
My vision blurred as the new intense heat shot through my frame, to my brain, and back again, taking with it every sense it could. Suddenly, I remember looking up just as this huge shadow took down the man on top of me. I heard barking and snarling, followed by screams and the scurrying of feet, just before everything became unbearably black. My last thought being of my rescuer...was it that shepherd from before?
***
I woke to whispering and something warm caressing my face. I could hear a little, and barely see. However, I could smell perfectly fine...I could smell cologne...the same one that Yuki always had on.
"Yu...ki...?" my voice didn't come out at all. It was shot, probably beyond repair at this rate.
Why was this all happening to me? Why did everything bad always happen to involve ME?
"Take it easy. You're in no condition to even be talking. Just relax. I'm not going to hurt you." a soft voice explained as a warm hand combed gently through my hair. It was a man holding me. He had such a kind voice...I automatically trusted him...after all...he WAS taking care of me...right?
By the time any sight had returned to me, I was already nodding off again. The man holding, although I wished it was, was not Yuki...nor anyone else I knew.
"Am I dead...?"
"No, you're very much alive, kid. Just take it easy though."
I should've known though, just as I started to regain myself back, I drifted into another exhausted rest.
***
A/N: This chapter is dedicated to Mariah (Momo) which passed away while I was working on this chapter. Come to think of it...it wasn't just a coincidence I put the BLACK GERMAN SHEPHERD in here...hehe, yup, Momo's famous. Thank you all for being so damn patient...between losing another dog, and my own social problems, I really can't seem to concentrate...but I'll try my very best to make up for it. ^_^
***
Game Over?
Continue?
***
By: Ryoko [a.k.a. Raiju]
***
Track 2
***
My legs have never hurt this much...
My arms have never felt this worn...
My heart has never sped this fast...
My head has never pounded this hard...
All of this because of him? All of this because I was running away from HIM?
I found myself at the Oceanside, MILES and MILES away from anything I could recognize. I was lost...both geographically, and emotionally. My heart was in a tizzy.
The ocean looked so calm this afternoon, and the darkening sun setting on the horizon of it only made the picture more serene. I fell to the cement, dangling my feet over the edge and watching the sun set, thinking deeply about what I'd seen and done all within a matter of a single day.
I randomly looked up, hearing the faint whimper of an animal close by. A black German shepherd stood in the alleyway close to me, whimpering from, what sounded like, hunger. I reached into my sweatshirt pocket and pulled out a few sticks of pocky that I'd forgotten to eat. I held it out, smiling the best I could and clicking my tongue until the dog trotted closer to me. She looked up at me, then sniffed the food, instantly grateful, and eating it as fast as he could.
"Sorry, that's all I have."
She looked up at me with large brown eyes, clouded over with pain and suffering, but now with new light. Like a new ray of hope. She was so thin, so underfed and uncared for...must've been abandoned.
My attention went back to the water in front of me, so calmly just sitting there... both me and his total stranger, basking in the glow of the twilight sun.
"Should I try to go back...? Even if I WENT back...I'd only be hurt more...I don't wanna see him so angry...but...I wanna be there for him...what should I DO?"
***
The loud blaring of a ship's horn woke me the next morning...while it was still dark. I sat up slowly, looking around. Still at the dock, the same dog laying beside me with his head up either due to the fact that I was up, or that the horn had woken him up as well. "I must've nodded off..." I looked down at my watch.
"1:52 am...damn. Well...guess I might as well get going..." I sighed heavily, standing and dusting myself off. I started to walk away from the docks, toward the alleyway. The dark was so cold...especially at night, in the middle of autumn.
I looked around when almost out of the darkness, seeing absolutely NOTHING familiar. I'm lost...oh shit...I'm lost...! "Where AM I?" I mumbled, stepping out into the street.
"Lost, kid?"
The intruding voice made me jump with surprise, before I spun around. Three or four people were standing in the alleyway a little ways from where I'd just come from. I backed up a step.
"N...no." I blurted out, taking another step back. I turned, breaking into a speedy walk, but one of the shadows was quicker than I and grabbed me by the wrist. "Ah! Let go! It hurts! Let go!" I yelped, trying to twist my arm out of the figure's grip. They let go almost immediately, just standing there.
From the dim light, I could make out a man, around 5'11", heavyset, bald with black eyes, staring down at me. And I was only a mere KID. His face was hard to see, but he looked at me in a way I really didn't like...
Me, being the dimwit I was, stood there holding my wrist and hissing in pain softly, watching his movements carefully. I stepped backward when he advanced, our steps slowly becoming quicker until I'd run myself into another alley. A dark one. With another guy that looked like he was gonna hurt me.
The other three of the group stood in the only opening to the alley, kind of covering it and watching as he started wrestling me to the ground, knocking over a trashcan in the process.
I felt as though I was going to be sick when my front hit the ground and my arms were held behind me. Taking advantage of my clouded thoughts, that contact with the pavement had caused, he bound my arms with his belt, rendering me almost completely helpless.
I shook my head, trying to get it to function again, regretting that I had. The moment my senses came back, I was wailing in agony, my organs being pushed up to my throat and my spine burning with pain. Oh god he hurt.
My vision blurred as the new intense heat shot through my frame, to my brain, and back again, taking with it every sense it could. Suddenly, I remember looking up just as this huge shadow took down the man on top of me. I heard barking and snarling, followed by screams and the scurrying of feet, just before everything became unbearably black. My last thought being of my rescuer...was it that shepherd from before?
***
I woke to whispering and something warm caressing my face. I could hear a little, and barely see. However, I could smell perfectly fine...I could smell cologne...the same one that Yuki always had on.
"Yu...ki...?" my voice didn't come out at all. It was shot, probably beyond repair at this rate.
Why was this all happening to me? Why did everything bad always happen to involve ME?
"Take it easy. You're in no condition to even be talking. Just relax. I'm not going to hurt you." a soft voice explained as a warm hand combed gently through my hair. It was a man holding me. He had such a kind voice...I automatically trusted him...after all...he WAS taking care of me...right?
By the time any sight had returned to me, I was already nodding off again. The man holding, although I wished it was, was not Yuki...nor anyone else I knew.
"Am I dead...?"
"No, you're very much alive, kid. Just take it easy though."
I should've known though, just as I started to regain myself back, I drifted into another exhausted rest.
***
A/N: This chapter is dedicated to Mariah (Momo) which passed away while I was working on this chapter. Come to think of it...it wasn't just a coincidence I put the BLACK GERMAN SHEPHERD in here...hehe, yup, Momo's famous. Thank you all for being so damn patient...between losing another dog, and my own social problems, I really can't seem to concentrate...but I'll try my very best to make up for it. ^_^
***
Game Over?
Continue?
